I was reading a news article the other day about a man who transitioned to a woman, changed his mind, and transitioned back again. He was very very rich, and I assume that he was able to somehow fast-track the process (skipping much of the counselling stuff).
It got me thinking. If someone said to me, right now, here's some money, go get surgery, and here's a doctor who'll operate on minors, I would be running off to wherever that doctor was and be throwing banknotes at him.
But, the more mature side of me knows that that's a REALLY bad idea, that no matter how strong my dysphoria is now, things might...just...possibly (SO NOT GONNA HAPPEN) change and maybe I'll be happy in my own skin without scalpels getting involved.
So I think that maybe at some point, I'll get to a stage where I would hoard the money somewhere and wait for a go-ahead from someone who knows what they're doing, instead of jumping right in.
Who's at that stage? Anyone?
What would YOU do if you had a million pounds and an unethical doctor?
I would just go for it, which is exactly what I'm doing.
I don't think this is a bad idea. For as long as I can remember I have felt this way. I am 22 now so it's been way too long to just be a phase or something. I have no doubts.
I would be thrilled to have whatever a million pounds is in USD, already got access to "unethical doctors."
I would hoard the money until I was absolutely sure I knew what I was doing. I wanted a tattoo on my ear so bad I thought I was going to die but now I'm so glad I didn't have the money. I don't trust myself to know whats right when I want something so bad I think I will die.
if I had that much money then I would complite my trandition first with all my plans, I think it would be more easy since I could travel to whatevery country I wanted to make the best operations and surgery I felt needed.
after that I would give myself a sump of money to use,
a sump of money to spare,
a sump of money for friends and famely,
and then give the rest milions to poor people and organisations who would make something good in my opinion..
I sound so angle sweet, but I dont have the big need for money,
I've felt this way since I was 4. When I realized why I felt that way, and that I wasn't the only one, I gave myself two years. Two years to figure out exactly what I wanted, where I wanted to go with my life, and how I needed to go about that. It's been more than two years, I'm dead set and nothing can change my mind. But I've got to make sure I do it right, I'm not in a position to save the money, but I can afford T, and I have an appointment with a doctor who prescribes hormones on informed consent.
As far as surgeriy, I'm willing to sacrifice waiting time and money, in exchange for quality. I have a friend who went the illegal route, he says the thing he regrets is being wreckless and jumping for surgery in a foreign country. His results weren't bad, but they could have been better, and he really got lucky.
I've had over two years to figure everything, what therapist, which hormones and how to get them, which surgeries, which surgeons, and what order.
I've got my therapist, I've got an appointment with Dr. Gary Smith for hormones (recommended by my doctor and my therapist) which I want to be on before Ukraine next summer, I want top surgery and sculpting before I graduate from from a surgeon in Florida, and either after I have work or if I can get a grandparent loan I want to get the full phalloplasty by Perovic in Belgrade. If I can find a local or US surgeon who performs the same type of hysterectomy as Perovic I'll probably have that done sooner, but otherwise I'm willing to wait, for the sake of optimum quality. I have yet to find surgeons better than these two (for what I want) so I'm set on them specifically. If I rushed into Surgery right now, I know I'd regret giving up the possibility of better quality. I'm trying to be happy in my body, and that requires surgery that I can be pleased with and not have to worry about if "it could have been better".
I have a problem with hoarding anyway, so I'd probably start by hoarding it, then forget the money existed for a while and get depressed about not being able to transition. Then I'd remember it, stock up more money, and try to get the doctor to do experimental surgery that's never been done before, just to see if my idea would work.
i would jump right in i mean if the doctor i wanted would operate on me and i had the money i would go for it. well i would want to be on T for a year before top surgery. if i could i would get on T today and in 6 months to a year i would get top surgery. if the doctor i want was unethical and i had the money i would do it.
Transitioning is a lot different than a tattoo. It's a lot bigger decision, but to some of us - it's a no brainer.
If you are transgender, and have as high of dysphoria as many of us do, then I think all of us would go ahead and get this done. I'm 21 and I've felt like this since my EARLIEST MEMORIES. I tried to conform, and it didn't work. It made me sick to think of myself as a girl. I took the time to ponder on whether or not transitioning was right for me, but then I asked myself why it wasn't right for me. I couldn't think of one thing except for other peoples reactions. <not allowed> other people. If I had an unethical doctor, and a few million dollars, I would opt for everything right away. I would get lawyers to deal with everything so I wouldn't have to, and I would be legally male in every way shape and form within the next few months. Then I would buy a bloody vehicle, drive my ass to NY for my grad school and get on with my life.
But as Orion said, I would not jump into surgeries unless they were performed by the best.
I'm at the point right now where I'm eeking by without top surgery but need it and am currently saving. It's slow going, I have a low paying part time job and go to school so am not able to save much. I'm really counting on my sister a lot who is going to boot camp for the Navy soon and told me she will help pay for my surgery.
For the little over 3 decades I've been alive I have to say that every decade was vastly different. In hindsight I'm really super glad I didn't have the options young people do today because I probably would have been one of those jumpers too. There's certainly a part of me that wishes many years ago I could have gotten these moobs off my chest (literally) but then another part that is happy I've never had surgery of any sort (unless you count tonsils getting out).
One of the main things I've learned over time is that no matter how stubbornly I announced to the world, "I AM NEVER GOING TO CHANGE!", I have. Change is one of the only constants in life. On the inside, I'm still who I've always been - just gotten refined and molded over the years. But I was definitely making poor decisions from the ages of 16 to about 28 ... ones that, if I knew then what I know now, I never would have done. That's not to say I have regrets about my decisions ... all of them add up to exactly who I am today.
If I had a seemingly unlimited amount of funds to get everything I want out of life, I would go for it. I'd get on thyroid pills, maybe even get a gastric bypass, transition, have skin taken off, and get fully inked up. :P
I can't say for certain that I'd never have the slightest regret, because I already do feel a bit of dissatisfaction and disappointment that my life has gone so drastically different than I thought it would be. My path in life has been a really hard one to go down. But there's nothing I can do to change that. And I do think it would have been a lot easier on me to just have been born a boy, not born a girl who naturally looks like a boy. But also, I'm a very forward thinking person. Once my mind is made up, it stays made up. I run full speed ahead with no looking back. That's just how I am. And I've decided that this is what I want and feel is the best course of action for my future and personal happiness.
I did my time and am ready for freedom.
However, I've had too many experiences with bad doctors to trust an unethical one.
When I figured out what the solution was, of course I wanted it right now. Because of that anxiety & despite waiting so long, following the recommended course has been a good thing. It has helped me feel like I'm on solid ground while going though the awkward experiences that are part of this big change.
I'd probably wait for a good doctor. I'd hate myself for it, I know for a fact, but I'm so terrified of medical ->-bleeped-<- as it is.
I'd hate the wait, but it'd be a damn shame for me to finally feel right and die a few days later.
if i had that much money i'd spend it on a house and car. and a motorcycle
after that i'd possibly try hrt if i had a good doctor who agreed with my reasoning. and i might want top surgery and a nice tattoo on my back, or maybe a full body one
bottom surgery of any kind isn't an option for me yet, i couldn't get the result i want so it's better to wait and see what science may provide in the future