I'm not sure if this is where I post but... Too late now, I suppose! I will never get over this awkward.
For a while now, I've been playing with the idea of my gender and sexuality, but not until recently had I actually dug as deep as I have now into the subject! I always thought I was a bit off for thinking this, going to an all girls, religion-tied school since third grade. Several of my closest friends were coming out, and, with that, it was only natural I look at my own. I've always felt like the guy of the group, and I thought that was fine. Though, nothing feels... Right, if you get what I'm saying, when the guys at the football game would talk to me, or when I had my first boyfriend, or when I would get that jumping feeling when I saw some of my female friends. This year, I've begun to come to terms myself, and I've found out I'm not as messed up as I thought I was. I look like a girl, but feel like the guys. Yes, okay, I knew that already. But, now, I finally told the girl I liked I thought I might love her, and she said the same. Another check. Though, with my previous thoughts about being trans masculine, I never thought you could like both guys and girls. Stupid, right? I thought it was ridiculous, and someone would surely get mad if I even mentioned it. But, now I see that it isn't what I thought it was, and I actually feel like I can fit in that slot I'm comfortable in, despite being afraid to tell someone other than complete strangers on a forum. Whoops?
So, what's you're story? There's probably already another one of these open, and I'm sorry if I screwed up or anything! I'm hoping to get this right sooner than later~
hi i hope you find your way. so this is how it started.
i was a gender bender, so was my little brother. he would role play and we would both be boys, men, knights. i was fine with being dressed in dresses and such when i was little. i was always one of the guys my best friend in lower elementary was a kid named michael then patrick i didnt like playing with girls. i found it harder and harder to be one of the guys they pushed me away, but i didnt fit in with girls. i always knew i was different.
I was a junior in high school and I got my hair cut short and I would dress up in guys clothes mixed with girl clothes, then just guy clothes, and I would always try to look androgynous, I remember my dad even telling me that I looked androgynous and I remember thinking that I wanted to look as andro as possible.
Quote from: Elijah on October 05, 2011, 04:28:40 PM
I was a junior in high school and I got my hair cut short and I would dress up in guys clothes mixed with girl clothes, then just guy clothes, and I would always try to look androgynous, I remember my dad even telling me that I looked androgynous and I remember thinking that I wanted to look as andro as possible.
i had a very similar experience except i was about 20 and in undergrad. i started taking a lot of women's and gender studies classes, got my hair cut short, blended men's and women's clothes then just men's clothes. started going out to gay bars and packing sometimes but not often... i'd always get so nervous even though i loved it. i remember my first time seeing a drag show with kings and was completely blown away. i wanted to be exactly like that.