The way we talk and communicate can be very different between males and females. This is quite well known and accepted.
This link has some advice on this matter. While aimed at MtF, it shiuld be useful for FtM as well.
Be interested in reactions.
http://feminizationsecrets.com/communicate-like-a-woman/ (http://feminizationsecrets.com/communicate-like-a-woman/)
To be honest that site looks kinda sleazy to me. Why are all the ads emphasizing boobs and sexual poses?
Quote from: pretty on October 06, 2011, 07:04:38 PM
To be honest that site looks kinda sleazy to me. Why are all the ads emphasizing boobs and sexual poses?
It does appear that way. Not sure what they are thinking about really.
Some of the commentary, is equally rather, dreamy. It is certainly commercial. The site owners seem to be trying to sell their products quite a lot.
I know our own Janet reads (at least did), some of the articles on that site.
A number of the articles on there are quite intersting. They rarely have a lot of information in themselves. But can start lines of thinking that can be quite interesting.
This one seemed to have a number of ideas which I thought might be a useful template for a discussion on this site.
I should say that, along with many others, I have noticed a change in the style of posts here. Discussions seem to be more centred and less hypothetical. I'm not sure if those that have stopped posting are bothered by this particularly. For my own part, I do hope we can get some thinkers back here. But Susans' is an important part of my own life, so I'll just persist while I can.
Sorry if some of the aspects of that site bothered you though.
I guess this is among the things that I find rather irritating. I don't feel a need to gender communication patterns. I don't think it's necessary.
My body, my voice, my physical self I'm willing to accept are gendered. Even certain mannerisms, ways of walking, sitting, etc. seem to be gendered. But I'm unconvinced that anything else needs to be.
Or to put it another way - learning how to tell a good story, speak politely, and show interest in other people are all useful communication tools. For anyone.
Quote from: spacial on October 07, 2011, 08:47:31 AM
It does appear that way. Not sure what they are thinking about really.
Some of the commentary, is equally rather, dreamy. It is certainly commercial. The site owners seem to be trying to sell their products quite a lot.
I know our own Janet reads (at least did), some of the articles on that site.
A number of the articles on there are quite intersting. They rarely have a lot of information in themselves. But can start lines of thinking that can be quite interesting.
This one seemed to have a number of ideas which I thought might be a useful template for a discussion on this site.
I should say that, along with many others, I have noticed a change in the style of posts here. Discussions seem to be more centred and less hypothetical. I'm not sure if those that have stopped posting are bothered by this particularly. For my own part, I do hope we can get some thinkers back here. But Susans' is an important part of my own life, so I'll just persist while I can.
Sorry if some of the aspects of that site bothered you though.
Well the article is a bit confusing to me, why would you want to learn to communicate differently? How you communicate is a part of you. Isn't transition supposed to make the outside match the inside? If you change the inside too then it seems like transition is an attempt to become someone else rather than you.
Quote from: pretty on October 06, 2011, 07:04:38 PM
To be honest that site looks kinda sleazy to me. Why are all the ads emphasizing boobs and sexual poses?
Think about the stereotypical man's perception of women and what he sees and there is your answer.
Sex, and nothing but sex.
Not all think this, but there is a vast majority that do, 99%* of conversations in jail between men are about women and sex with them.
*99% of all statistics are made up including this one, it just puts emphasis on the point not meant to be a literal statistic.
A woman wouldn't tell you about the "pink dress" she just bought. She'd tell you about the "sleeveless fuchsia Diane Von Furstenberg wrap dress" she just maxed out her credit card on.
Wtf, lol, yeah I don't think any of my girl friends would do that. That would be annoying.
Quote from: pretty on October 07, 2011, 02:08:49 PM
Well the article is a bit confusing to me, why would you want to learn to communicate differently? How you communicate is a part of you. Isn't transition supposed to make the outside match the inside? If you change the inside too then it seems like transition is an attempt to become someone else rather than you.
I think there may be some value in the idea, although I don't know that I agree with that website specifically.
My communication skills at this point are the result of years of being raised as and socialized as a male. I don't see it as a part of who I am, so much as how I convey who I am to others, and my ability to do so at this point is definitely lacking. So, I feel the way I communicate needs to change, and thus improve.
Hey spacial .. thanks for trying to help but people vary and to make people into a stereotype is not going to help anyone but maybe the newly transitioning person who can only see the basics of gender..
PS: I care about you :)
Instead of finding on this site what you dislike you might truly look into the text and what it suggests.
There are all kinds of transitioners out there, late or early from all different backgrounds. Specifically some of the late M-F folks might make use of those suggestions as they might not pass very well or have a harder time finding social connection so when they do have an interaction they may as well make the best out of it.
A lot of suggestions on this site I have come to learn through my own observations but I am relatively young and outgoing.
And yes the site is looking sleazy but Spacial did not recommend you look into the web design or the breast enlargement tips either.
peace out!
At least the woman running the site cares. Wait a month for my report on her herbal method for one year compared to one year HRT. I wish she would find some TG models instead of the cis women stock shown. The forum images from her readers are a bit risqué to me, a lot of hairy boobs. I respond to those articles anyway.
Joelene
Edit: About this communication method. I would recommend some kind of speech therapy anyway. I have GERD and until I get it under control, I will not attempt voice training until my larynx heals. I almost had the Jimi Hendrix experience (the one that put him on the slab) twice with the upchuck and partial aspiration while sleeping.
Quote from: ~RoadToTrista~ on October 07, 2011, 02:46:52 PM
A woman wouldn't tell you about the "pink dress" she just bought. She'd tell you about the "sleeveless fuchsia Diane Von Furstenberg wrap dress" she just maxed out her credit card on.
Wtf, lol, yeah I don't think any of my girl friends would do that. That would be annoying.
It could also be regional. The only person I know who did that was my ex, and she was from the east coast (US, that is). All my girlfriends grew up in the west like me and we're more to-the-point. We have names for girls who gush about that much detail: rich bitches or snobs. To us, there's the "cute purple one," the "adorable blue strapless one," or "what do you call that color? Puke?"
Quote from: Amazon D on October 07, 2011, 07:11:55 PM
Hey spacial .. thanks for trying to help but people vary and to make people into a stereotype is not going to help anyone but maybe the newly transitioning person who can only see the basics of gender..
PS: I care about you :)
I care about you too.
But as envie put it, it's just information. There does seem to be some discussion started and some thinking about the issues.
What I found most intersting about the video, beside the stereotype female, concerned with brands, was that the talk was presented by a man.
I can't accept the notion that men and women have the same conversations. I've had to spend much of my life trying to emulate male conversation styles. Theirs' seems steeped in various levels of hero worship.
Maybe it's generational since gender roles have eroded in our modern world?
I grew up in an age when girls did not go out of their way to prove that they can talk as foul as any drunken sailor. Guys clearly talked and acted one way, girls another. Guys I couldn't really relate to but was basically forced to adopt and adapt to the role. Given a situation like a party or get together with a bunch of people I just met, I always wound up talking with the women more then guys.
The communication skills the site talked about are basic communication skills as well as great selling skills. I guess it works since women, being flowers not bees, do have the biological drive to sell herself to a potential mate. Some guys have to learn communication skills to be better at sales. This shy introverted engineer did better then many of my companies sales people because when I talked to the customer my female side was my inner salesmen. I asked questions, empathized with their current problems that needed to be solved, found out what was most important, and knew what I could easily do to help them if we didn't already have a solution. Most of the salesmen I've worked with could do little more then just tell them what they needed.