So, on a more serious note, I have to ask an important question to all of you F/Ms out there:
Who of you has always had a bad or at least complicated relationship with your mother?
I won't delve into the psychological analysis of the topic now, it's quite obvious to many therapists
that the lack of a female role-model can lead to gender dysphoria in girls lateron, but this would be
to easy, really, wouldn't it? I mean, there are cis guys out there who hate their mother's guts and
don't come to terms with the lack of approval they got from their moms throughout their lives, so there
must be more to it.
In my case, since I've told her that I mean businesss with transitioning this time and that I won't stop
before I see the final result (me=man), she's behaving rather odd: first, it was all a bed of roses, like
of course I must do what I feel is right, and yes, it'll take some getting used to, and all sorts of jokes
like when she was supposed to call me at my new male name etc, she could never take it seriously;
and she kept saying things like ' Today you really don't look male at all, you know' like she was rather
saying 'I think you'd better NOT do this, you're such a nice girl' (however, she never told me whenI
was looking great even when I was still a 'normal' girl/woman!
She's the most annoying person ever! And the trouble is, she is NOT an alcoholic, drug addict what have you,
she's just so 'likeable' and nice, and people would probably describe her as a decent person; while she
is not at all!!!! She's 64 now and I think suffers from first waves of dementia or Alzheimers, her personality
has changed drastically during the past 4 years, she's growing more aggravated and stressed out for
no reason, doesn't care about her body hygiene, dresses horribly at home and outside, in short, she's
turning into one of these people who're losing it and you can tell!
I've been pitying her all through my adulthood, she was always weak but nice, my father was very dominant
to the point of physical abuse (no beatings, but the odd slap over the dinner table whenever he didn't like
what i said), so she never stood a chance against him, which was the reason for me to take her side and defend
her; later in life, she wasn't really going for it either, always defensive, never ambitious, and I know I really hate
her for that!
Now she blames me for everything that's not right in her life, and me transitioning is just about the pinnacle of
her misery, but she's too false and pretentious to speak to my face, instead she makes all these hints, and I can
tell from the look of her face that she doesn't approve at all!
I can live with my ex-boyfriend advising me to thing 'really long and hard' about it, saying, 'If you want to do it,
ifg it can't be 'helped' >:-) you do it, but I'd rather hope you didn't.... But my Mom staring me in the face with a
smile and stabbing me in the back at the same time.... I really regret now to allow her to influence my life so much!
I've made decisions in her favour at times when I should have thought of myself and nobody BUT myself! Now I find
myself in this place with her where there's no way out really! We share a big house which neither of us wants to
leave, but there's a point when no house can replace the feeling of being at home with yourself!
I really hate her so much right now, I sometimes catch myself wishing she would die! Any of you went through similar
stages of anger? And how do you control it? Maybe, the lack of T at the moment (still not on it)- has prevented me from
freaking out completely, who knows? But seriously, guys, who of you also hates your mother? And why? A,nd did it interfere
with your decision to transition?
My mother can be manipulative and scary and childish and a lot of other things, and I don't think she loves me, and I know I don't love her, but I don't hate her. I've never considered how my feelings about her might relate to my gender.
Quoteit's quite obvious to many therapists
that the lack of a female role-model can lead to gender dysphoria in girls lateron
This doesn't make a lot of sense to me. It sounds outdated. I was a psych (and bio) major in college, and I was certainly taught that lack of gender-appropriate role models can cause identity and self-esteem issues, but I never heard that it could cause specifically gender dysphoria. None of my therapists have brought it up either. I could be wrong.
If I were you I would leave the big house and go through whatever it takes to get away from this person you hate. It sounds like she's making you feel bad. You don't deserve that and it will hold you back.
I have tons of complications with my mom and none with my dad. And I'm mtf.
I've had much more daddy issues growing up than I have ever had with my mother.
And I still identify with him more, regardless.
I mean, I've gotten angry, but I've had a lot more issues with parents that extend beyond me being trans.
I guess that's mainly because I never got much pressure to fit into "female-likeness" by my parents though.
As far as frustration when things in your life feel out of control goes, I can relate to that entirely.
I get along great with my mom. She has been my support growing up. My father was standoffish and we really didn't have much of a relationship. She is uncomfortable with my transitiion --- I think b/c she doesn't understand it. However, she is trying and she hasn't been mean about it at all.
I love my mom to bits. She's always been very supportive of me in my being different from the mainstream. I think it was a bit like she would have liked to be like that but never had the feeling she could keep her head up with all the people being negative about it.
Only trouble I've had with my mom is about her trying to arrange my life too much like thrice a year. Just resulting in her cleaning up and organising my room, that's it.
I've been more annoyed with my dad, but that's just because he always wanted to know éverything at the moment I really didn't feel like talking. (early in the morning, right after school etc)
All in all, gender doesn't change a thing in this house. Even though they've called me daughter for more than 20 years, I've always been allowed to do and wear as I pleased. And probably mostly cause of that freedom, I hardly have any trouble with my folks.
Then again, a lot of friends have pointed out that they're pretty much one-of-a-kind, so that would just be my luck then.
Looks like you guys were indeed lucky having the moms you had! The trouble with mine is really that
on the outside, she seems to be almost perfect. Nobody would understand if I told them I had the
problems I described, they would look at ME, trying to find the source of the problem in my refusal of
the 'normal' life everybody else seems to aim for.
As for the role model thing, I've had a therapist talk about that, a couple of years ago, and he mentioned
something along those lines: 'Because I don't find my mother and her relationship with my Dad and men
very encouraging, I refuse to become a woman (I was 14 then and annorectic).' I found this a rather easy
explanation really, but then, I didn't see the guy very often anyway, and eventually solved the problem
myself (no more eating disorder), but still found the idea of living that sort of life (as someone's wife) not
very appealing; it wasn't like I was refusing fighting female identity, it just didn't come natural to me, but
my mom never took it seriously; she didn't even 'worry' when I didn't get boyfriends and stuff, but when I
mentioned lesbians and homosexuals she'd cringe and avoid the subject!
Her disapproval is a very subtle one which makes it even more difficult to ignore.
And as to the house, I've done it up and worked my bum off in there to make it nice, and it's more or less
a dream come true for me, keeping horses in the field behind the house, enough space for the dogs, so
my animals would suffer the most if I just left and moved to a smaller place!
Another issue is that the house is in Germany (where I don't want to die, to say the least, I never meant to
come back anyway, but Belgian homes have become so expensive it's ridiculous!) and I would have to find
a decent place back in Belgium where I lived for the past 10 years. So, to say the situation can be described
as a tad on the complicated side :-\
Sorry you have such a tough time with your mother.
My mother and I don't really have a relationship. She's a distant woman, and doesn't like me very much, and her opinion is I deserved my father's and brother's treatment of me growing up. Just my personality grates on her, and she's not the type to put up with people she doesn't like much. Eh.
I love my mom. :o Our relationship has been getting some hits lately -- unfortunately, me being queer has everything to do with it :/ -- but we're still close.
My dad's the one I have the most difficulty with, actually. A lot of the conflict happens when he says gross, bigoted things, but the rest of it is just ego clashing. ::) When I was a kid everyone who knew me would comment on how much I am like my dad. I'm 99% sure that's why we don't get along a lot of the time, we're too similar. Though I'm pretty happy that I escaped with a more open-minded, tolerant perspective than the one he has. :P I still love him, though. He's done a lot for me.
This is a tough one for me, because while I know my mother I was raised primarily by my Dad and grandparents (funnily enough my mother's parents.) I don't hate her, but she has a lot of issues. In her mind, she loves the idea of being mother but hates the reality of it all. She's also been a drug addict/alcoholic and is currently spending time in jail awaiting charges on a few things.
All that being said, my mother really is very kind. When she is sober, you would never meet a nicer person. While she was never really there in my life, even when my parents were married, I don't hold it against her. I love her and I do have some good memories of her, but I don't really like her as a person. I used to hate her, but then I realized that you don't have to like someone to love them.
My dad was the one I have always had problems with. Even now I have serious issues with him. Our relationship is much better than it used to be, but with my soon to begin transition and his new wife, I don't think we will talk for a while.
However, I do have a mother figure. My grandmother on my mom's side raised me for several years. So, I never really lacked a mother figure in my life. In fact, she is my rock.
So, I don't think one could argue that gender identity and dysphoria are based on a lack of materinal influence.
QuoteI used to hate her, but then I realized that you don't have to like someone to love them.
I think this is an important concept.
Not mother, but GRANDmother yes. I do hate HER. For personal reasons I won't go into that on here.
I love my mom. I don't really know why she has a tough time dealing with me being trans. I have been out to her for almost a year now. I try to talk to her and explain to her what I am and how I feel but she never wants to listen. I try to tell her I don't hate women and that I am not one one. The day I came out to her we were talking and she said that I could be a girl or a boy when she wanted. I told her that was selfish and creepy. I am a guy and I am a person not an object. I really wish that we got along better and that she would love the son shes got instead of being so obstinate.
I moved out and away from my mother at the very first opportunity. She passed away a few years ago before I could come out to her and it may sound mean but I was a little relieved. Everything I did was wrong, to her my life was a train wreck and it was all my fault and blah blah blah....not because I'd done anything bad, but just because it didn't fit the expectations she had in her head...as in married with 2.4 children and a career as a rocket scientist. She tried to kill herself on many occasions and I read many many suicide notes over the years, all of which had a nice little section about me and how upset I made her feel because I made so many mistakes, and how she wished she could take me with her and end my pain. It's like thanks mum :-\ you believe my life to be so terrible that you would rather just put me out of my misery. She had bi-polar and was an alcoholic for as long as I could remember so I never really took much notice of her disapproval and I wouldn't say I exactly hated her, I just moved out and became indifferent.
I also never knew my dad, I ended up with a string of horrible stepdads. So no decent role models on either side over here :P
The funny thing though is that, although I never wanted to be like my mom, I always, even as a little
child, wanted to sort out her life for her. I wanted to get everything right and then start again; but that
never happened; me being stuck here in the middle of nowhere with her is just another result of that, I guess.
But I keep asking myself why the heck did and do I care for her more than for myself? I almost feel guilty,
and since I've come out to her, this feeling has even increased, because now I make her life even more unbearable!
She's unhappy with about every single aspect of her life, nothing has worked out for her, and now - this!
I mean, she could have told from the way I presented myself for years now that I'm not your average little
lady, so why the fuss now? We did talk a lot when I was in college and later at uni, but for the last couple of
years, our conversations have only one subject, money, and the struggle to keep the boat afloat!
I don't let this influence my life too much, I can still be happy and see a bright future instead of waking every
day with a frown on your face! I was really really happy about coming out and taking things into my own hands
now after years of indecision, and now that very fact makes her turn against me!
So, do I hate her? Do I love her? All I know now is that my father had a good reason to walk away from her back
then after all, and perhaps it wasn't all his fault...I wonder what he'd think about the whole thing, I haven't met him
in 15 years and he's not exactly in the area.
I love my mom. We get along great now, but we didn't when I was in high school. Mostly because I was dealing with several issues at the time--coming out as trans, being (unmedicated) bipolar, the girl I dated. It took several years to get things right with her and rebuild our relationship. Things aren't perfect, nor will they ever be, but our relationship is much healthier now.
I'm sorry you have to put up with that. Even if you are stuck living together you might be able to find activities that keep you out of the house more.
My mother and I have different perspectives on how life works, and we sometimes clash over that. Despite that, we get along fairly well and have a good relationship. She is a feminist and has always encouraged me to do what I want regardless of if it's a gendered thing, and I love her for that.
Im actually the opposite.
I am very close to my Mum. Albeit, for the first few years of my transition, there was a great strain in our relationship as she struggled, but it is forming with a new strength as she accepts me more.
I grew up with my twin sister and Mum, we have been through alot together, but it has strengthened us and kept us extremely close.
Father on the other hand. Dont know his name. Had step Dads,but always felt like I raised myself in terms of male role models. For me the question would be, "Do we all hate our fathers?". (Although hate is a strong word, maybe, "not give a crap about...")
I'm lucky. My mom and I have always been very close, and she's been a huge support/voice of reason for me since I finally came out to her.
My dad's a different story. I don't know if I'll ever be able to be out to him, and while we get along casually, we've got no real relationship. I still love him dearly, but I hate a lot of his opinions and the things that he does. Its weird.
I used to hate my mom. I used to hate her so much. I blamed her my while life up until 18 for how I felt about my body. There really was no reason why I thought how I felt about my body was her fault. I was never sexually abused, just physically.
But then when I was 18 and realized that I was trans. I stopped blaming her for how I felt and realized I was born this way. so I stopped hating her. But I still want nothing to do with her and will never speak to her again. I won't forgive her. but I will forget her.
My mom doesn't know I'm trans. I haven't spoken to her since I was 18.
But I have an aunt like your mom, CaptainFantastic. I used to live with my aunt. and she started out saying she was accepting of me. but then slowly changed to trying to make me want to be a girl. And even just her personality sounds a lot like yours. She wants everyone to think she's so perfect.
I love my mom as well. She'll never understand how my head works and we used to get into tons of arguments when I was growing up because she wanted to make me into more of a girl, but I know she was only doing what she thought would make my life ok. In spite of everything my life turned out ok anyway. She still throws a comment around here and there about how I don't look or act like a girl. She also still thinks I don't have a "real" job. But that stuff doesn't bother me. Other than that she's a lot of fun and she's taught me a lot of important things in life.
Mom tried to "make" me more of a girl when I was a kid. For example, she didn't allow me to wear certain kinds of clothes or get my hair cut short because that would've made me look like a boy. But I'm sure she was just concerned about me not getting bullied if I didn't fit in. Well, I never did fit in after all... :P
As for now, I think Mom is my biggest supporter along with my fiancé. She's completely okay with my process and took my coming out of the closet phase well. She does have her problems, like the everlasting name issue, but I'm sure she'll get over it.
Sometimes, it feels like I'm the only one who doesn't have any issues with their mother about transition process... :-X
I hate my mother because she physically and mentally abused me as a child. I wasn't really trans, I wasn't really even a full person. The reason I dislike her has nothing to do with being trans, nor does being trans have much to do with her I think. I realised I was trans after I got out of that toxic environment but to believe that the two are related just because they both happened is (in my opinion) a bit silly. It might be true for some but correlation does not equal causation and generalisations always leave out a good number of people.
I love my mom very much. We're really close. We had a rough patch a few years back, but we're over that. I call her mommy. 98% of the reason I'm not out yet is because of her. It will kill me to hurt her. Making her cry...ugh. I can't handle it. I know it's going to break her heart, I'm her only 'daughter' (three sons and me) and it means a lot to her even though I've never been feminine. I'm sorry to all of you who don't have good relationships with your mom/parents :(
I love my mom.
My dad on the other hand...I wouldn't say I hate him, but I don't really have a good relationship with him...or any kind of relationship actually. I used to hate him when I was younger, but now that I'm grown I don't. I just feel sorry for him.
Not a fan of my mother. I'll be happy never to see her again.
My mother and I have an interesting relationship...
To put it simply, I'm like my father and my sister is like my mother - my mother hates my father's guts, but since I'm her child, she tries to look past our differences. When my sister's around, though, she's a time bomb waiting to go off.
We fight a lot, and although that's not abnormal for a mother-teen relationship, we fight about all the wrong things. She constantly crosses lines I've previously and clearly drawn - bringing my father into arguments, bringing my step-sister/step-mother into arguments, and questioning my love for her - though I have yet to say anything she'd find offensive. I sometimes wonder why I hold back, since she claims that I've said all sorts of horrible things that I didn't, but then I remind myself that she's my mother and I know I love her - even if she doesn't think so. The woman may be crazy, childish, and a pain in the ass, but we have our moments and she accepts me for me, so I can overlook all the bad things.
As for my father, he's an older version of me - literally, now that I actually look male.
We get along swimmingly. :P
My mother gets on my nerves a lot, childish and has her own little temper tantrums. Makes me feel guilty cause I don't want to do EVERY little thing here. I don't think I really love her that much, no...but she raised me herself. My father had nothing to do with me and my brother because he was already married and didn't want to ruin it. Mom never forced anything on me, not religion, not gender, not sexuality. She has tried her best to support my atheist/woman loving/male identified self, as her child. So, no I don't HATE her, just minimal love, and more respect than anything, I think.
I know my daughter loves me but I wonder how she would answer this question.
I don't hate mine. Just the indifference or blindness to the suffering I went through from about 13 until I left home. And the refusal to see that I never was a boy now that I have started transition, regardless of what I look like.
I don't hate mine but I don't love/like her much either. She's been a pretty terrible parent and while she admits to some past mistakes, she's oblivious to the current ones, she's completely impossible when it comes to me being trans, and she's probably still mentally abusive to my younger siblings, even if she can't get to me anymore.
My father isn't a whole lot better though, haha.
Quote from: Tossu-sama on December 10, 2011, 07:26:04 PM
Mom tried to "make" me more of a girl when I was a kid. For example, she didn't allow me to wear certain kinds of clothes or get my hair cut short because that would've made me look like a boy. But I'm sure she was just concerned about me not getting bullied if I didn't fit in. Well, I never did fit in after all... :P
Quote from: AugustFalcon on December 11, 2011, 04:30:38 PM
I don't hate mine but I don't love/like her much either.
Similar,.. almost same here. :) I don't hate my mother, but that's not full love I feel. I've tried to understand her, I accept her - it must be hard to accept things which she doesn't know yet very well. I know her thoughts and ideas are not clear, she does not know many things all around the world so... One day she's okay, she asks many things for I feel great, then next day she's on the edge shouting me.. and I see on her face she would not say how shame I am for my family but she feels that within.
What to do? Hating her won't solve problems, won't wash away the mistakes... I remember those days when we had our family-shoppings, everybody should have been together, aaah. But I cannot hate her because she tells me all the time that I should wear this or that (which is not also a female piece, but old-fashioned that SHE wanted to wear but no chance on that...) - I even won't forgive her when she attacked me in front of my friends on ~ how I dare buy a baseball cap, it looks so boyish, may I wanna be a boy or what?! ~ then another day bought my sister three baseball caps in pink and gave me one... I won't forgive, but won't show my back either, I won't shout but won't gulp the pain either, if have some because of her deeds and words. :-\
In the last month she calls me once a week, talks about herself then nothing. When I go home, she shut her mouth and walks away. But I cannot blame her or hate her. No way. I talk more often with my feminine dad, we get on well - sudden weird-good thing it is. :)
My mom is awesome.
She just sent me home with cookies, muffins, and soup for finals week.
i love my mom so much. she loves me and i love her i really hope nothing will ever change that. i hate my dad sometimes, he is an ass.
My grandfather was in the SS :P
My mom and I got along quite well when I was younger, before I started to think for myself more. Now I wonder if she's at an early stage of Alzheimer's or something too, her personality has changed drastically to me as well, becoming more high-strung and quick to yell "sin!" at practically anything I defend. I'm not out to either of my parents but I think if I was out to her, it would break her entirely (though I have early memories of crying and telling her I was a boy). Her irritability and constant "you're a sick, disgusting pervert" perception of her kids (my brother is gay) makes it hard to talk to her.
My dad and I, on the other hand...always rough, always a relationship of fear. Yet I also see more of myself in him and hold him more as a role model than my other family members.
Quote from: JasonRX on December 08, 2011, 04:47:34 AM
I've had much more daddy issues growing up than I have ever had with my mother.
This. Although now that I've spoken to him in much more detail about my transition and what changes he is going to see, he's really supportive. It just takes time. My mother on the other hand, there is no human being I am closer to than her. Even though she has told me seeing my transition is going to be a huge deal for her and a journey for both of us, she is supportive 110%. She's my mother and my best friend.
Quote from: fionabell on December 12, 2011, 01:19:32 AM
My grandfather was in the SS :P
I just thought I'd add, so was mine :)
I love both my parents, though I relate to my mom a lot more than to my dad. My dad is just... there. He's a good guy, but we're so alike in terms of our personalities and quirks that it irks me to spend significant amounts of time with him. We rub in the wrong direction yet still love each other dearly. And even though my mom can be a little over-the-top when it comes to drama and emotions, we always get over it. Pretty much your regular semi-functional family unit, lol.
Would a simple "no" suffice?
I really like that you asked that question, and it looks like it gave us all some thought. I love my mother and my grandmother very much but I know being trans is very hard on them. I used them both since I actually ran away from home when I was a child to live with my grandmother. Its taken me awhile to figure out how I felt about them but I do love them both even though I dont always like or agree with what they do. My grandmother is mormon and generally doesnt think its ok to be gay or be trans and gay so when I came out it really made her think about everything. My mother is a recovering meth addict (clean 12 years and I am very proud of her) so shes accepting of it all and just wants me happy. They both stated the only problem they had was in thinking being trans and being gay was a CHOICE. I think they have finally realized its not a choice its just part of who I am. Even my grandmother is coming around, she tries hard to call me by my name and use male pronouns. I don't push her to do it, its her choice and I dont freak out on her if she gets it wrong..I mean shes almost 90 lol she deserves some slack. So no I dont hate them, they are trying so hard.
On a flip side I met my boyfriend/partners parents in june of this year. OMG talk about supportive. They are very proud of their gay son and show it and now that I am in the mix they are proud of me too. They treat me like one of the family and really support both of us. I say not bad for an older catholic southern republican couple ( no disrespect to anyone btw when I say that)
Quote from: CaptainFantastic on December 08, 2011, 04:11:09 AM
im sorry but I think the point seam alittle stupid..
why should we hate womens, or female role models for being maculine or ftm?, then what about all those violance fathers who hit there sons, they will automatically turn mtf?..
no it dosent really work that way.
--
for anyone who currious I had a good relationship with my mothers in general, but the being transgender things had made it hard,
she have a hard time accepting me as a guy, and I feel heartbroken for loving her if she cant love who I am.
My egg donor has never been there for me, and when she has, she has tried, along with her mother, to mash me into some mold. My birth name is Christie, named after Christ, and I have that held over my head constantly. I still love her and all, but I also don't expect her to change. Control runs in the family, and instead of being the lesbian she is, shse hides behind religion. Does this have anything to do with my gender identity? hell no. I've always looked up to my dad more and ever since I can remember I wanted to be just like him. When I found out boys peed standing up I wondered why I couldn't. But I never heard about sex changes and transgenders until I was out of high school. That's thanks to my Baptist family. Everyone has their own unique relationships with their parents. I only care about my egg donor so much because of her health sucking major nuts. I f she were healthy I would never speak to her again.
Looks like you guys were indeed lucky having the moms you had! The trouble with mine is really that
on the outside, she seems to be almost perfect. Nobody would understand if I told them I had the
problems I described, they would look at ME, trying to find the source of the problem in my refusal of
the 'normal' life everybody else seems to aim for.
its pretty much the same with me and my mom.
I Do like my mom, however the thing about me being transgender and her acceptence been very hurtfull for me.
she been very aganst me trandition, she sorta try not to but even this and there she seams very unsure.
People who see her from outside think im the evil one for refusing her so much, but once in a while I has to because otherwise she will just hurt me by putting me down.
I'm glad to see that so many of you guys are doing fine with your mom's, and I guess I was
looking for an easy explanation as to why I never got round identifying with the female, being
a biological girl, and instead chose the opposite.
It's just what I heard from (bad) therapists, pointing in that direction. I'm still very very glad I'm
everything but a blueprint of my mother. The moments when I feel I want to cut her out of my heart
oddly contrast those when I feel I want to get everything right for her because her life wasn't really
much fun.
For the moment, with x-mas coming up and all that, I've agreed to a temporary cease-fire - that is, if
she doesn't start annoying me too much again - which is one of her specialities, and holidays and the
festive season is one of her favourite times to do it! I guess I'll be in trouble next week anyway, because
I agreed to take a dog in for the holidays while the owners are off to Spain; I've been knowing for weeks
now, but i'll have to sell it to her like I only got the news...tomorrow, so she can't say anything. Well, she
probably will, but what the heck! I'll get paid for taking the dog, and as I'm rather skinned at the moment,
this is a welcome 200 EUR for our x-mas budget (smoked salmon and bubbly after all! Yippee!)
If it all goes belly up, I can still put put all the dogs in the van and head out camping in the woods - nice ;D
Quote from: CaptainFantastic on December 16, 2011, 09:43:51 AM
I'm glad to see that so many of you guys are doing fine with your mom's, and I guess I was
looking for an easy explanation as to why I never got round identifying with the female, being
a biological girl, and instead chose the opposite.
It's just what I heard from (bad) therapists, pointing in that direction. I'm still very very glad I'm
everything but a blueprint of my mother. The moments when I feel I want to cut her out of my heart
oddly contrast those when I feel I want to get everything right for her because her life wasn't really
much fun.
For the moment, with x-mas coming up and all that, I've agreed to a temporary cease-fire - that is, if
she doesn't start annoying me too much again - which is one of her specialities, and holidays and the
festive season is one of her favourite times to do it! I guess I'll be in trouble next week anyway, because
I agreed to take a dog in for the holidays while the owners are off to Spain; I've been knowing for weeks
now, but i'll have to sell it to her like I only got the news...tomorrow, so she can't say anything. Well, she
probably will, but what the heck! I'll get paid for taking the dog, and as I'm rather skinned at the moment,
this is a welcome 200 EUR for our x-mas budget (smoked salmon and bubbly after all! Yippee!)
If it all goes belly up, I can still put put all the dogs in the van and head out camping in the woods - nice ;D
blamming the parrents, or your childhood are always a very typical gay/trans thing.
please ignore people telling you anything like that because its all b***
if those prejugings where to be true then it would mean EVERY person on earth who had a bad relationship with there mothers and who biologically was born female, would turn out to be transgender.. I know we are a couple of transgender but really thats ALOT of people..
I like my mum and dad a lot. I had a great childhood where I was free to be pretty much exactly as I wanted. During my teen years my parents were stricter but they've calmed as I became older. Now they trust me and respect me enough to make the right decisions for myself and my future happiness.
I have a love/hate relationship with her.
I hate her old school ways in concerns to religion. I also hates that she drinks and smokes and takes it out on me but I do love her and it is going to tear me up inside the day when she won't be on this Earth anymore. Heck it tears me up to think of her being in a retirement home. I don't know how I will handle that. Even at age 20 she gives me a "mummy tuck" in bed if I am ever feeling sick and she still do a lot of things for me out of the goodness of her heart. She is the reason why I am completely shelted but I'm enjoying it for as long as I can because one day she won't be here to do those things for me.