personal examples would be appreciated so I can find out about the different variations of stealth. :)
Well the Predator was stealth...so were a few superheroes. There's also stealth planes.
:laugh: :laugh:In a transgender context of course......
I am not visibly trans, I don't out myself to many new people, and the people who know keep my history confidential. Basically, the people who are important in my life know, and the people who are/were involved in my transition know, and everyone else can ->-bleeped-<- off. So I'm some degree of stealth.
I choose not to disclose simply because I don't really want to be "the trans girl I know." Like it used to be "the gay person I know," and before that "the black person I know." I'd rather be allowed to be a complete person.
If someone really desperately wanted to they could probably track down who I used to be. Which would be irritating, but hardly devastating.
Quote from: Sarah7 on December 17, 2011, 11:28:17 PM
If someone really desperately wanted to they could probably track down who I used to be. Which would be irritating, but hardly devastating.
Who did you used to be? ??? I not asking for an address and social security number, i just don't under stand what you meant by that
Quote from: Sarah7 on December 17, 2011, 11:28:17 PM
I am not visibly trans, I don't out myself to many new people, and the people who know keep my history confidential. Basically, the people who are important in my life know, and the people who are/were involved in my transition know, and everyone else can <not allowed> off. So I'm some degree of stealth.
I choose not to disclose simply because I don't really want to be "the trans girl I know." Like it used to be "the gay person I know," and before that "the black person I know." I'd rather be allowed to be a complete person.
If someone really desperately wanted to they could probably track down who I used to be. Which would be irritating, but hardly devastating.
If people can clock transexual individuals after srs, does "stealth" really exist? I think "stealth" is a bunch of funny stuff. I can't deny my past, no matter how much surgery I get.
I'd rather people know.
I don't come out to anyone. It's been many years since my transition. I am who I am. The people I now know have always known me as "Cindi". I have no desire to complicate my life. I wanted to be a woman, not an object of curiosity.
It took many years to reach this place in my life. I moved a few times, took different jobs, and here I am. I like it just fine. My only connection to my past is here, where I might be able to help someone along the way. My transition was extremely messy and I feel like if I can help someone just a little bit, then my life will be all the richer.
Chin up!
Cindi
@fionabell,
Stealth, oh god where do I begin. It's working in a job where if they every find out I'm mid transition. They um... grunts will make my life hard. not so hard cause my job is 4 sates from my home. I travel there for 3 out of every 6 weeks. But it's things like keeping up 2 of everything, facebook, e-mail, damn near everything. at lease until I can A save up the SRS cost, or B find a new job that will pay enough for the SRS costs.
Stealth for me will be the point when/if I pass fully so people don't question my sex, so new people will be none the wiser of my transness and if I lose all contact with people I know now for whatever reason then no person knows about that I'm trans... Until I find a nice guy.
stealth is walking round town shopping, banking, dining, drinking with other women giving me the quick once over to check out clothes, shoes etc then the look away without reaction, guys holding the door open and taxi drivers calling me 'miss'.
->-bleeped-<- spotting is as amusing to homosexuals as homo spotting is to GMs and GGs.
Quote from: Mahsa the disco shark on December 18, 2011, 02:48:06 AM
If people can clock transexual individuals after srs, does "stealth" really exist? I think "stealth" is a bunch of funny stuff. I can't deny my past, no matter how much surgery I get.
I'd rather people know.
Maybe this is counting for you, don't know but it's absolutely not counting for everyone.
The fact that one can't deny the past is something completely different than being clocked.
Depends of one was lucky enough before transition with bone structure, body/facial hair etc.
Stealth originally referred to just not showing up on radar. If you looked up in the sky, you could still see the plane. I think that's pretty much what Mahsa is trying to say.
stealth is the deliberate act of trying to be something or someone your not. feeling you have or are deceiving another is never a good thing for sure . . . and the luxury of being able to fall back on a "need to know basis" is the best we can ever hope for or do. anyone who seeks to wholly deny who they once were in the past is missing the whole point and unique value of being "trans" in the first place.
Given the 'ole debate "Which is more important ? PASSING or ACCEPTANCE ?" i think being completely honest with every potential "significant other" is just a necessary, integral part as also being True & Honest with Ourselves.
I was stealth when I was still living as a male, just like a gay guy was stealth before he came out as gay.
Now I am not stealth anymore, I am finally open about who I am. A woman. Just like that gay guy is not stealth anymore now he is finally open about the fact that he is gay.
I really don't like the way the term 'stealth' is generally used in the transgender world. It suggests that we have something to hide. But I stopped hiding when I told the world that I am not a man.
Quote from: fionabell on December 18, 2011, 01:12:31 AM
Who did you used to be? ??? I not asking for an address and social security number, i just don't under stand what you meant by that
I meant my previous legal name and gender marker.
Kia Ora Fiona,
::) In a nutshell.........
::) Stealth = Keeping 'mum' about ones past life...
::) Deep stealth = Keeping 'mum' about ones past life, with 'fear' as the enforcer...
::) Semi-stealth = Keeping 'mum' about ones past life, but without fear as an enforcer...
::) The above is in a nutshell, but there's a lot more to it than just the nutshell's contents !
Metta Zenda :)
Quote from: fionabell on December 17, 2011, 10:20:18 PM
personal examples would be appreciated so I can find out about the different variations of stealth. :)
Blending in with society as male or female without question 24/7 (physical appearance, voice, mannerism's etc) which may or may not require surgery depending on the person.
Changing documents & shredding others so that you cannot be linked to your past.
Distancing yourself from family & friends and starting fresh some where.
Distancing yourself from the trans community online & in real life as to not expose yourself which as of now i'm doing.
This is my definition of stealth which might not be for everyone, hope this helps some people and good luck. - xo
Changing documents & shredding others so that you cannot be linked to your past.
That was surprisingly hard even before the computer age. Good researchers can find just about everything. But now, your past is always just a couple of keystrokes away for anyone in the government, or anyone involved in finance (money, its' our state religion).
Oh so stealth is just not bringing up that you are trans and letting people think you were born female.
I've been reading it as , taking hormones but still going around as your man self lol.
Thanks. It's cleared up.
Mental note: Must work on voice and possibly a hand-o-rechtomy :laugh:
Quote from: Sarah7 on December 18, 2011, 10:44:26 AM
I meant my previous legal name and gender marker.
I see. In the post before this one you can see where my confusion was. ;)
Now i know better.
I hope i can go stealth. I'm like a bodybuilder right now :'( :laugh:
Quote from: fionabell on December 18, 2011, 10:25:03 PM
Oh so stealth is just not bringing up that you are trans and letting people think you were born female.
But I don't know what anyone is thinking, nor do I care.
I just exist.
Quote from: fionabell on December 18, 2011, 10:25:03 PM
Oh so stealth is just not bringing up that you are trans and letting people think you were born female.
I've been reading it as , taking hormones but still going around as your man self lol.
Thanks. It's cleared up.
Mental note: Must work on voice and possibly a hand-o-rechtomy :laugh:
Kia Ora Fiona,
::) The alternative '
stealth' as used by some... [Well according to Zenda's observations-so take with a pinch of salt ]
::)
Stealth =Feeling like one should have been born the opposite sex, but not disclosing ones true feelings to others.
::)
Deep stealth = Living as ones birth sex but still in denial of ones true feelings-[For M2Fs some become very 'macho' in an attempt to deny their trans-nature]
::)
Semi-stealth = Still living as ones birth sex, but have just come to terms with ones condition and have told a select few,[and perhaps have started HRT but not living as ones opposite birth sex yet] or in private have experimented [dressed up and may have even gone out in public] but not yet ready to tell others...
::) Another 'in a nutshell' moment: [Or an according to Zenda moment, have salt at the ready]....
::)
Stealth = Swapping one
closet for another = Living as ones birth sex one is in the
closet about ones true feelings["I feel like a man/woman !"] ...Then one comes
out for a period of time,[transitions] before venturing back into another
closet= either
deep stealth which can be quite claustrophobic at times or
semi stealth where the
closet door is left a jar wide enough so one can either step out or invite others in !
Metta Zenda :)
Quote from: Cindi Jones on December 18, 2011, 03:04:45 AM
I don't come out to anyone. It's been many years since my transition. I am who I am. The people I now know have always known me as "Cindi". I have no desire to complicate my life. I wanted to be a woman, not an object of curiosity.
It took many years to reach this place in my life. I moved a few times, took different jobs, and here I am. I like it just fine. My only connection to my past is here, where I might be able to help someone along the way.
This sums up what stealth means for me as well. It took a lot of work moving, taking different jobs, changing my last name, changing every bit of contact information and saying bye to everyone I ever knew except my closest family. Even living with protected identity for a while.
Now I don't take any measures to hide anything because there is nothing to hide. Time passed and your past become more and more distant. I kind of figure myself living in stealth as well since no one "knows" and if they would know or suspect it's not an issue and no one has ever mentioned anything (I doubt it but you never know if HR department or something found out by chance somehow). I actually met someone I knew when I was 16 the other day in a night club. Someone who used to bully me a bit for being who I am/was and I had MAJOR fun making him think I'd go home with him and letting him buy me drinks without disclosing he used to know me. :)
That's what stealth means to me.