I was wondering if anyone else had problems speaking up in class. I am so self conscience of my voice that it usually just makes me too anxious to speak up in class. Not to mention, I have severe social anxiety any way. I always get the "to improve his grade, Russell should speak up more in class..." blah blah blah. Did/does anyone else have issues with it?
Before testosterone, yes, it was really awkward for me.
Do your teachers actually refer to you as "Russell" though?
If you're in high school still, that's pretty accepting. I mean, out loud is one thing, but I've seen several teachers that make the excuse "oh, well, I can only refer to my student as their legal name when I'm documenting something" i.e. a report card. Well, unless you haven't already legally changed your name, that is.
All of my teachers refer to me as Darrin, but I still have an issue speaking up in class. Mainly because I stutter. But I am a quiet person and don't really like talking that much to other people.
I've had this issue with work, especially lately. Huge disphoria for me. I just started at a new residence house so everyone started with Paul/He from the beginninging, however with my position I have to make a TON of phone calls and run a TON of medical appointments and I hate it everytime. Because even though my voice is a little on the deeper side, it's still feminine and I HATE when I introduce myself as Paul and people still say she (sorry that last part was a rant).
I don't really have much of a problem in class, either I'm "correcting" (read: shouting) at the teacher, or I get on well with them and I get slightly hysterial and just end up joking around. I do have that problem in sports, especially how we've started playing rugby, and I'm constantly getting shouted at for not calling for the ball enough, as all I can ever manage to say is "yup", while everyone else is screaming "yes! rightrightright! iwanttheball! yes!". At work as well I say the exact same things every time (waiting in a pub), and cringe whenever I hear that squeak come out as it always gets worse then somehow? I'm guessing it's my nervousness (anxiety) around people.
So yeh, I feel where you're coming from. Although I can't see how a lack of participation in class discussions will lower your grade unless you're graded on what you're like in class? As long as you're listening, taking notes, and revise before exams you should be ok right?
I used to hate speaking out in class, I didn't want attention drawn to me, I hated the thought of people looking at me because they heard me speak and seeing me. I actually took a year off my college career, partially due to finances and partially to transition. By the time I started back I had been on T for about 10 months. I feel that I am more confident now. I don't mind people looking at me because I know I look like I'm supposed to, a man. I feel more and more comfortable talking in class, I think what makes it easier for me is that the field I'm studying (office technology) the classes I'm taking has only women so I find it easier to speak out in front of them than I feel talking in front of men.
I haven't had issues speaking up or asking questions in class since I was in middle school where I was quite shy and had a lot of resentment towards my body (oh puberty...). In high school and college (or any sort of setting with strangers, really), I have had no qualms speaking out because my pursuit of knowledge and wanting to understand a topic trumps any potential dysphoria. I'm pretty shameless in general anyhow.
I usually go the entire school day without saying a word. Apparently it makes most of my teachers nervous since I never talk, but that's because I as well am really conscious about my voice, especially since I had to spent 9 years in speech therapy. I'm also not one to say what ever is on the top of my mind, so I'm just usually lost for words or have no input to conversations and no questions during lessons.
I'm not in school any more, but I find myself afraid to speak up in other situations, especially when I feel like I'm passing because I tend to get a lot of weird looks when they call me he or sir and then I open my mouth and they realize their "mistake". I pretty much accept it as a fact of life at restaurants and stuff, but I try to speak in stores and if I'm there with someone else, I whisper a lot and talk as quietly as possible so people don't really hear me, which annoys the people I'm with. I really want to get on T.
it depends after coming out i talk way more. also i participate in the classes im good at but i stay silent in the classes im bad at or if i dislike the teacher.
Sometimes when my daughter yells for me from a few aisles over in a store I don't answer, I just walk to her and get close before asking what she wants. She calls me daddy, but needlessly giving half a building the chance to examine my voice makes me uncomfortable.
I was more much into participating in class post transition. I can't say if this was solely because of my voice or just the overall fact that school was no longer the suckfest it used to be.
My voice makes me too self-conscious to talk in class, yes. Bummer, because a lot of our progress is monitored through seminar participation.
Yeah. I'm hoping to get on T by the next school year. I'm lucky though that I go to a school that is very openminded, and all the teachers address me by Russell and with male pronouns. I think that just drawing attention to myself is just too anxiety provoking for me. Hopefully once I get on T, I will be more confident! :)
I really struggle with speaking up. T has done wonders for my voice over the past five months, but social anxiety does not let me speak easily, especially when I'm directly asked a question. Or when it's a question which could be answered in more than one exact, prescribed way, (...which is 99% of questions) but I think that's a personal quirk.
In my program class participation is crucial so I don't really have a choice, heh. It's gotten much easier to speak up as my voice has dropped. When I appeared very male but my voice wasn't there yet it was much harder though.
Quote from: AdamMLP on December 29, 2011, 03:47:40 PM
I don't really have much of a problem in class, either I'm "correcting" (read: shouting) at the teacher, or I get on well with them and I get slightly hysterial and just end up joking around.
lmao i was the same way in high school. i was either besties with the teacher and joking around the whole time or yelling at them because they were stupid and i hated them :P
although i have a lot of social anxiety by the end of high school i just didnt give a rats ass and was very loud. i have a large mouth :P
high school was five years for me as i took a victory lap and in my fifth year i went to a different school where i was a year older than everyone in my classes.
in the ninth, tenth and eleventh grade i was quiet as a mouse partly because i was bullied and partly because i had zero self confidence but in my twelfth and thirteenth year i got some self confidence and just did my thang
I hate to talk because I am a very shy person in general especially since I'm pre-T/everything. I was in a police patrol class with 6 other guys and the professor said. "Okay I'm going to pick on you since you are the only girl. Why do you think women have such a hard time entering policing?" It was just an odd experience....
I went to public school for 5 & a 1/2 years, and I also didn't like to speak up in class. Partly because I didn't enjoy everyone's attention being on me, being the only one talking, and I just didn't understand how participation could affect my grade.
The only exception was if the teacher tried telling people something that was incorrect or a personal opinion, which pissed me off enough to speak up.
I remember once when my science teacher used me as an example in class "look at scott, never says a word but when I do call on him he knows exactly where we are and exactly what to say"
I always used to have a problem speaking up in class in high school. College I found was a lot better and I tend to speak up more often now because I feel that I don't have the spotlight put on me as much. I think it also helped that through my entire history class this semester though my teacher called me by my birth name, Amanda (I haven't had the courage to ask most of them to call me by my chosen name yet) the girl who sat behind me thought I was a guy by birth (that made my day:D). Turns out people don't always pay as much attention as you think they do.
Quote from: Anon on December 31, 2011, 06:21:31 PM
I went to public school for 5 & a 1/2 years, and I also didn't like to speak up in class. Partly because I didn't enjoy everyone's attention being on me, being the only one talking, and I just didn't understand how participation could affect my grade.
The only exception was if the teacher tried telling people something that was incorrect or a personal opinion, which pissed me off enough to speak up.
This is me so, so, so much.