There's no denying I feel like I should have been a girl. But for some reason I can't seem to convince myself that there's still a way. It's like I needed to be born that way, and changing won't work. I also know that my feelings are nowhere near as extreme as most of yours, so maybe part of why I think this way is that I don't think I can make such a huge choice on my own... Like it needed to be forced on me.
Quote from: Lyra Dash on December 29, 2011, 03:37:58 PM
There's no denying I feel like I should have been a girl. But for some reason I can't seem to convince myself that there's still a way. It's like I needed to be born that way, and changing won't work. I also know that my feelings are nowhere near as extreme as most of yours, so maybe part of why I think this way is that I don't think I can make such a huge choice on my own... Like it needed to be forced on me.
Forced feminization.. i heard of it but its too kinky for me..
If you are afraid to make the large jumps, go with smaller ones. I did the same, like doing my nails (black is a good choice) and wearing girl-style jeans. Both can start people's minds turning, but not as much as coming out completely. And sometimes you have to do a little more than what you are comfortable with, because if you just did what was comfortable, you'd probably never transition.
I guess I'll try that. I think part of what worries me is that I don't think I could ever look female enough...
Probably talking to a gender therapist would be a good start, and get your feeling sorted out. There is a huge diversity in feelings and all of them are correct for someone. You just have to find your place.
Quote from: 30kps on December 29, 2011, 08:26:33 PM
If you are afraid to make the large jumps, go with smaller ones. I did the same, like doing my nails (black is a good choice) and wearing girl-style jeans. Both can start people's minds turning, but not as much as coming out completely. And sometimes you have to do a little more than what you are comfortable with, because if you just did what was comfortable, you'd probably never transition.
Have to agree.
Whatever your intentions, objectives or determination, we should each take each step as we feel comfortable.
It isn't a race after all. That some here have bigger problems than other, that some are more determined or have more courage than others, is not a reflection upon anyone else. That's what I really like about Susans', I don't need to apologise for who I am.
I have started to think of the Gender Spectrum in 4 dimensional terms, rather than a line from Man to Woman.
As well as points between the two extremes of M and F, I imagine that there are other poles in different directions. That allows for all sorts of opposites to be included around the outside of the space, and an infinite number of variations of all aspects of Gender and Sexuality. It also allows for changes over time, which we all undergo in various ways. One of the counsellors at my support group thinks that it is a useful way of looking at being Trans, or just human generally.
There are no right or wrong ways to be Transgressively Gendered, just different ways to break the rules society tries to impose on us. As long as you can find something that allows you to try and live an authentic life, that's all that is neccessary.
Karen.
Quote from: justmeinoz on December 30, 2011, 04:53:32 AM
I have started to think of the Gender Spectrum in 4 dimensional terms, rather than a line from Man to Woman.
As well as points between the two extremes of M and F, I imagine that there are other poles in different directions. That allows for all sorts of opposites to be included around the outside of the space, and an infinite number of variations of all aspects of Gender and Sexuality. It also allows for changes over time, which we all undergo in various ways. One of the counsellors at my support group thinks that it is a useful way of looking at being Trans, or just human generally.
There are no right or wrong ways to be Transgressively Gendered, just different ways to break the rules society tries to impose on us. As long as you can find something that allows you to try and live an authentic life, that's all that is neccessary.
Karen.
ditto gender is a sphere going in all directions from the center.. the choice is yours
Lyra, try finding a near by support group and just try a few things at a time , say a pair of jeans , flats , minimal make up. Come out very slowly too. Just see how you cope with a couple of friends in say a Gay Night club . This ain't no race dear , this is yer life . Make the most of a "Good Journey ".......... ellen