Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Transsexual talk => Male to female transsexual talk (MTF) => Topic started by: MsDazzler on January 02, 2012, 05:53:41 PM

Title: The limp-wristed mannerism - A No-No as a Transwoman?
Post by: MsDazzler on January 02, 2012, 05:53:41 PM
As you know, tons of effeminate gay men and drag queens tend to have that stereotypical limp-wristed mannerisms. On them, it looks.. well... cute, i guess. lol.

I've seen natal females do the same mannerism, although not to the exaggerated degree as some of the effemmes/drag queens do!

I am wondering if as transwomen, we could get away with doing the limp-wristed mannerism (albeit, not so exaggerated) or would appear foolish or just gay doing it?

For the record, I don't usually do the limp-wristed mannerism, but I do notice I use it occasionally when I m out at gay bars with effemmes (group mentality, I guess) or signing, "Fabulous!" or "OMG, No way!" with my deaf gay friends.

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fmarytv.net%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2008%2F09%2Flimp2.jpg&hash=84c62162f48bd969603911eceec50cd506fdfeb2)
Title: Re: The limp-wristed mannerism - A No-No as a Transwoman?
Post by: stldrmgrl on January 02, 2012, 05:56:10 PM
If it comes naturally, I see nothing wrong with it; though as you said, overdoing it might draw some unwanted attention.
If it's being done intentionally, well, that's awkward and I'd lean towards ya, it's a no-no.
Title: Re: The limp-wristed mannerism - A No-No as a Transwoman?
Post by: Lily on January 02, 2012, 06:02:00 PM
I've found myself doing those hand movements a little in the last couple months, where before my hands would always just hang at my side.

I don't know why it started. I never made a conscious decision to start making girl hand gestures, it just kinda started happening. It feels natural to me, so I just let my hands do what they will.
Title: Re: The limp-wristed mannerism - A No-No as a Transwoman?
Post by: Keaira on January 02, 2012, 06:32:34 PM
I remember doing things like this as a child. it was just a natural hand movement for me. But it also helped get my butt kicked. So I trained myself out of it.
Title: Re: The limp-wristed mannerism - A No-No as a Transwoman?
Post by: Beth Andrea on January 02, 2012, 07:30:55 PM
I've always tried to control this kind of thing (and other mannerisms, because they got me targeted as gay or whatever)...one of the many things I did so I would "pass" as a man.

Not anymore! Not that I'm flamboyant or anything, I'm just not watching my every move to make sure I don't "girlie" myself.
Title: Re: The limp-wristed mannerism - A No-No as a Transwoman?
Post by: MyAlias on January 02, 2012, 07:34:35 PM
I say definite NO-NO! i don't want to be confused with a gay guy! I am a girl!
Title: Re: The limp-wristed mannerism - A No-No as a Transwoman?
Post by: Emi on January 02, 2012, 07:49:51 PM
IS funny..but where i live the fact that i dont have that mannerism are one of the  reason because  nobody in the LGTB community  or in my family / friends circles believe that i am transexual
"you are  to much manly and never was effeminatte   or look never  had gay amnnerism ..so you are just confused  and not  transexual"  :P  that is what they say...
I so amazing how much far are our   transexual cultures  :) 
Well to the point, i really dont care if i do or not a limp- wristed,  at this moment of my life i just want to be me...if that mean do limp wristed...is just ok...but well for now that mannerism is not part of my behavior..for good or for bad :P

But in a more objetive view...i never found to much atractive a  exagerated mannerism, no matter if come from a gay men, a transexual woman, or a cisg woman
Title: Re: The limp-wristed mannerism - A No-No as a Transwoman?
Post by: Mahsa Tezani on January 02, 2012, 07:50:23 PM
Quote from: MyAlias on January 02, 2012, 07:34:35 PM
I say definite NO-NO! i don't want to be confused with a gay guy! I am a girl!

Unfortunately, things don't often work like that.

That being said...I have very flitty wrists. LOL
Title: Re: The limp-wristed mannerism - A No-No as a Transwoman?
Post by: MyAlias on January 02, 2012, 08:08:13 PM
Quote from: Mahsa the disco shark on January 02, 2012, 07:50:23 PM
Unfortunately, things don't often work like that.

That being said...I have very flitty wrists. LOL
very true but I don't want to give them a nother reason to believe that!
I have nothing against gay guys, I have a few gay guy friends, but I am not a gay guy!
Title: Re: The limp-wristed mannerism - A No-No as a Transwoman?
Post by: Keaira on January 02, 2012, 09:12:33 PM
Well I've had many remarks about my being seen as feminine when I was still trying to present as a guy. One of my own sister-in-law's, when she first met me, made the comment to my wife that I seemed very effeminate. My Councillor made the comment that I was very soft-spoken and talked with my hands, used feminine gestures, etc. But I never even thought about my gestures or the way I spoke.
Title: Re: The limp-wristed mannerism - A No-No as a Transwoman?
Post by: Mahsa Tezani on January 02, 2012, 09:21:50 PM
If anyone here has heard my voice...I sound like a California gay guy doing an impression of a Valley Girl.

Title: Re: The limp-wristed mannerism - A No-No as a Transwoman?
Post by: MyAlias on January 02, 2012, 09:22:42 PM
Quote from: Mahsa the disco shark on January 02, 2012, 09:21:50 PM
If anyone here has heard my voice...I sound like a California gay guy doing an impression of a Valley Girl.
ooh ooohh I want a vid! I wanna hear!
Title: Re: The limp-wristed mannerism - A No-No as a Transwoman?
Post by: Keaira on January 02, 2012, 09:25:19 PM
I sound like a teenager. Still!

How a Bounty Hunter introduces himself (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eL1XJ3_4efI&list=FLqi32msQzK6Hv4HtPDPIARA&index=6&feature=plpp_video#)

There Mahsa! :P
Title: Re: The limp-wristed mannerism - A No-No as a Transwoman?
Post by: Mahsa Tezani on January 02, 2012, 09:27:23 PM
Quote from: MyAlias on January 02, 2012, 09:22:42 PM
ooh ooohh I want a vid! I wanna hear!

I have nothing to talk about transition or anything else.

I am not gonna make a vid on youtube unless I have something to say and I don't. I sure as hell won't be posting a video of me and other transsexual women.

I'll go dig up some of my gay friends. That sound be fun and possibly turn into a makeout session.
Title: Re: The limp-wristed mannerism - A No-No as a Transwoman?
Post by: Jen-Jen on January 02, 2012, 10:03:03 PM
Quote from: MyAlias on January 02, 2012, 07:34:35 PM
I say definite NO-NO! i don't want to be confused with a gay guy! I am a girl!
I have to agree, it just seems to say that to people for some reason! I also have nothing agaist gay guys, I also just rather not be mistaken for  any kind of guy.
Title: Re: The limp-wristed mannerism - A No-No as a Transwoman?
Post by: Joelene9 on January 02, 2012, 10:16:10 PM
Quote from: JennyCop on January 02, 2012, 10:03:03 PM
I have to agree, it just seems to say that to people for some reason! I also have nothing agaist gay guys, I also just rather not be mistaken for  any kind of guy.
Me neither.  The women in my family are not limp-wristed nor are they all overly effeminate.  I'm taking my cue from them. 
  Joelene
Title: Re: The limp-wristed mannerism - A No-No as a Transwoman?
Post by: Annah on January 02, 2012, 10:32:30 PM
Quote from: MsDazzler on January 02, 2012, 05:53:41 PM
As you know, tons of effeminate gay men and drag queens tend to have that stereotypical limp-wristed mannerisms. On them, it looks.. well... cute, i guess. lol.

I've seen natal females do the same mannerism, although not to the exaggerated degree as some of the effemmes/drag queens do!

I am wondering if as transwomen, we could get away with doing the limp-wristed mannerism (albeit, not so exaggerated) or would appear foolish or just gay doing it?

For the record, I don't usually do the limp-wristed mannerism, but I do notice I use it occasionally when I m out at gay bars with effemmes (group mentality, I guess) or signing, "Fabulous!" or "OMG, No way!" with my deaf gay friends.

The transwomen I have seen in the past who did the limp wrist thing profusely just never blended in to me....meaning people knew they were trans.

Had a trans friend who did it and other bodylanguage to the point where i was like "omg cut it out...you're outing yourself everytime you do that."

So, for me, I think the limp wrist thing can def clock you.
Title: Re: The limp-wristed mannerism - A No-No as a Transwoman?
Post by: MsDazzler on January 02, 2012, 10:39:57 PM
Yeah I've seen some natal females be limp-wristed or flutter their hands constantly and they don't look trans... how can they get away with it?

Think Blanche from Golden Girls... that woman flutter her hands all the time, heh
Title: Re: The limp-wristed mannerism - A No-No as a Transwoman?
Post by: eli77 on January 02, 2012, 11:01:44 PM
Ah... it's different. I'd never do the forward drop with my palm down thing, unless I'm being ironic.

But I do gesture a lot of with my wrists relaxed. Especially the forward drop with palm up thing. With girls it all tends to be fluid and fast and look thoughtless. When gay guys do it, it's emphasized, specific, and intentional. Because they are being ironic. If you act like you are doing "girl" ironically, you aren't actually going to look like a girl.

I'm not sure how you learn it, or why I move like that. It's just built in.
Title: Re: The limp-wristed mannerism - A No-No as a Transwoman?
Post by: Mahsa Tezani on January 02, 2012, 11:13:01 PM
Quote from: Joelene9 on January 02, 2012, 10:16:10 PM
  Me neither.  The women in my family are not limp-wristed nor are they all overly effeminate.  I'm taking my cue from them. 
  Joelene

Why not just be yourself?
Title: Re: The limp-wristed mannerism - A No-No as a Transwoman?
Post by: MsDazzler on January 02, 2012, 11:36:26 PM
Quote from: Sarah7 on January 02, 2012, 11:01:44 PM
Ah... it's different. I'd never do the forward drop with my palm down thing, unless I'm being ironic.

But I do gesture a lot of with my wrists relaxed. Especially the forward drop with palm up thing. With girls it all tends to be fluid and fast and look thoughtless. When gay guys do it, it's emphasized, specific, and intentional. Because they are being ironic. If you act like you are doing "girl" ironically, you aren't actually going to look like a girl.

Yeah... i get what you mean.. it is like swaying your hips. I ve seen some crossdresser wannabes at Divas trying to sway their hips while they walked, but they were trying too hard to look like they were, so it ended up looking stiff and forced.
Title: Re: The limp-wristed mannerism - A No-No as a Transwoman?
Post by: EmmaM on January 03, 2012, 12:59:37 AM
I do it. Just happens.
Title: Re: The limp-wristed mannerism - A No-No as a Transwoman?
Post by: Anatta on January 03, 2012, 01:12:31 AM
Quote from: MsDazzler on January 02, 2012, 10:39:57 PM
Yeah I've seen some natal females be limp-wristed or flutter their hands constantly and they don't look trans... how can they get away with it?

Think Blanche from Golden Girls... that woman flutter her hands all the time, heh

Kia Ora Ms Daz,

::) I speak with my hands[No I don't mean sign language for the deaf]...Perhaps it's my French blood on my mother's side from way way back[Plus I lived there for a while many moons ago]...I'm just very expressive with my hands and always have been...I don't mean I'm a member of the limp-wrist brigade, I have bones in 'my' wrists, 'they' on the other hand[excuse the pun] don't seem to have... ;) ;D


Metta Zenda :)