I'm just wondering if the thoughts I've been having are in any way weird or illogical. I wish I could get pregnant. It upsets me greatly that I will never be able to. I cry about it sometimes. :'( I wish I could bear children so badly. It's probably stupid, I know because I can have kids other ways. I really don't know why it bothers me so much.
I know, I'm lucky, I don't have to go through periods or anything like that. Honestly though I'd gladly endure those and more to be able to bear children.
Quote from: Trixie on January 19, 2012, 09:19:02 PM
I'm just wondering if the thoughts I've been having are in any way weird or illogical. I wish I could get pregnant. It upsets me greatly that I will never be able to. I cry about it sometimes. :'( I wish I could bear children so badly. It's probably stupid, I know because I can have kids other ways. I really don't know why it bothers me so much.
I know, I'm lucky, I don't have to go through periods or anything like that. Honestly though I'd gladly endure those and more to be able to bear children.
youre not alone
I used to have dreams and nightmares of getting pregnant. I really wish I could.
But I've accepted it's just not in my future anytime soon.
Plus, even if it was it wouldn't be the same.
Fact is, I was not born a cis gender bio female.
It's really tough, but you're definitely not alone. There are lots of women out there that can't bear children for a number of reasons, and unfortunately you're one of them (and so am I).
Having said that, who knows what might happen in the future with medical advances, and there's always adoption. I know it's not the same as carrying the child, but you can still love and care for it just like any other mother.
I wouldn't think it's weird. It's just having maternal instincts.
I have also gone through times wishing for the ability to experience pregnancy....
I don't really have this desire but it may be because I have 3 kids. So I get my fix daily. Babies on the other hand I can't not hold. Last time I held my Nephew, his Mom kept saying "You dont have to hold him or feed him you know." And I just said "I know. But I want to." So I have some of that feeling of want or need. it's just not that strong compared to yours.
I wish I'd be able to get pregnant one day. It's one of the things I dislike most about being trans tbh.
I think it is a pretty common feeling. Part of the female brain contains 'I want to have children' circuits, depending on how female our brain is we may have the same circuits.
It is also quite funny that woman at my work bring their baby in and most of the guys quietly disappear, there I am have a hug and a cuddle along with the other woman.
I'm also on baby sitting duties for one of my colleagues, which is extra special; except last time the little one had explosive diarrhoea, so we both ended up needing a bath. Wouldn't have missed it for the world. Amazing how much one so small can contain. :laugh:
Cindy
I've often felt the desire to be pregnant and give birth over the years :) The only thing that has helped to alleviate that feeling is
knowing I'm too old now :'(
Me too.
Having to accept that it won't happen really hurt.
Quote from: V M on January 20, 2012, 02:59:57 AM
I've often felt the desire to be pregnant and give birth over the years :) The only thing that has helped to alleviate that feeling is
knowing I'm too old now :'(
Very much the same for me as above said.
I had horrible GID attacks about just this issue, horrible.
Post-op it got a lot better, a lot. But I still can get very emotional when reading or hearing related stuff. I can also feel so much for cis-women that can not have babies and so very much would want to.
It's actually heart breaking, - that is the feeling that always came up for me.
Yes, " You can't always get what you want...."
Axélle
I have the same desires. I dream about falling pregnant and carrying my child to term.
Yes, woman moan its uncomfortable, especially during the summer months... but it must be magical to have that baby growing inside you. Also then the breast feed afterwards. Breast feeding creates a bond with your child that the father never can have.
but I also have the another funny desire ... To expierence a period....I know its not the best female expierence and I know girls who cramp a lot during that time of month. They tell me I am so lucky not having to go through that every month. .. but the desire to expierence it exists...
maybe it linked to the pregnancy desire.. Maybe its because I have body of a woman and feel like one.. but I dont get those two female expierences Pregnancy and periods.. and it reminds me I was not born a woman..
I feel a little better now that I know it's not weird or anything. Every once in a while it really upsets me, sometimes to the point of tears.
I think I will be okay with adoption though. I know I'll be a good mother. :)
Trixie: Do not despair. It is actually fully plausible, depending on your age, that you one day in the future will MAYBE will be able to bare a child.
However please do not take it for granted and depend you everyday life on this possibility, however, you should atleast know that it is not an actual impossibility(By the way, the first MTF that modern SRS in the 1930's, Lili Elbe, did actually recieve a surgically speaking Successfull Uterus Transplant, but died the following weeks because of Tissue Rejection).
QuoteMedical advances have transformed the lives of transsexual woman over the last 50 years. Hormones provide huge physical and mental benefits, whilst surgery can provide effective female genitalia that permit a normal sex life - other than pregnancy.
After Sex Reassignment Surgery it can be difficult to distinguish many genetically XY male-to-female (MTF) transsexual women from a XX woman without an intimate medical examination. Indeed, some transsexual women now lead their lives without their friends, work colleagues, and even husband ever having any inclination of their sex re-assignment.
One study found that transsexual women are as likely to have reproductive dreams and daydreams as any other women.
Transwomen cannot bear children due to their lack of internal female reproductive organ. Fortunately most transsexual women seem to have no great desire to bear children - and it's perhaps relevant that many older transwomen have often previously have been fathers. However some transwomen - typically those who transitioned at very young age - experience extreme broodiness, jealousy of pregnant women, anger at the "unfairness of life" and even clinical depression.
Ayana Tsubaki - a Japanese post-SRS transsexual starlet - as a pregnant woman.
The denial of the basic female right to have children and enjoy the wonderful and unique experience of motherhood is a tragic loss for some transsexual women - as it is for other infertile women. Seeing other women having children or even worse complaining about their fertility and worse seeking abortions is often hard to bear. Paraphrasing one very frustrated [British] MTF transsexual "I just want to be a Mum on a Council Estate with a pile of kids".
For transsexual women seeking to have children and be a mother, things are even harder than for XX women because of the additional barriers she faces in relation to adoption or the use of a surrogate mother. However, the situation may eventually improve.
Just ten years ago the idea of a genetically XY "male" (be they a transsexual woman or a non-transsexual man) having a baby was still science fiction, but soon it may be science fact - advances in fertility treatment are starting to hold out great hope. It could be only a few years before the first transsexual woman gives birth - assuming that someone desperate enough and rich enough hasn't very quietly done so already.
The remaining and very recommended reading in the following link, also containing detailed descriptions of procedures technically possible for Transsexual Pregnancy: http://www.secondtype.info/pregnant.htm (http://www.secondtype.info/pregnant.htm)
My mom calls me crazy for it, but I certainly hold onto hope that I can one day give birth to a child of my own. I'm a pretty stubborn person... I'm sure I'll do it one way or another.
After all, it's not impossible.
:)
That's one of the reasons why I detransed. I'm kind of non op now because of it.
I remember , I once imagined I was pregnant when I was 5 years old. I put a pillow under my shirt. ;D Now in retrospect that is something I am happy no one else saw.
I think it will be possible at some point. I think it will come to late for the current users on this forum. Just think of all the issues which need to be dealt with.
Maybe it's just that I still think I'm a little young, but I haven't really thought much about my ability (or lack thereof) getting pregnant. I think I'm just not at that point in my life yet.
I wouldn't mind going through the whole monthly cycle thing though...
LOL... I use to put pillows in my shirt and walk around pretending to be pregnant when I was a kid :laugh: My mom eventually told me to stop it so then I'd just do it when I was alone
It's actually just been within the past few years that I haven't been practically obsessed with the idea
this sorta wierd to read cause its all opposite of me.
I always hated pregnancys so much, and even thought im happy others doing the work, I dont understand why they want to and I would never want it myself?
however I used to dream of being the father type, who wouldnt get pregnent but come in after the baby where born.
and usunally also it where kinda wierd cause it seamed imposible and I couldnt tell other people about it, cause if they asked about I wanted kids they would imidently put me up with some mother/pregnent think who would just make me feel horrible.
Most cisgendered women will say we are lucky not to experience periods - but would most of them wish to have no womb and be unable to bear children, and have to take estrogen tablets for the rest of their lives? I doubt it.
It does upset me too, but I knew from a long while ago that being unable to have children would be one sacrifice I would make for transition. I have sperm stored, although I am not a lesbian, but there may be one way to find a surrogate mother. It may not be the best way but at least a chance of my a child from my genes may be possibly born. In some ways I feel guilty or inferior that I can't give my future partner children in the same way that most women can, but there are other women in my position, and with true love, my partner will find a way around it, rather than reject me.
Oh you're not alone. It bothers me immensely that I will never bear a child, never have the experience of it. The best I'll ever be able to do is adopt, and in truth, that's not a bad option. There are too many unwanted and unloved children in the world.
Nevertheless, it hurts that it's something I simply cannot have, no matter what... it's a fact of life that I can't do anything about. How nice it would have been... but alas. It is what it is. Le sigh
With current technology it's likely that an xy individual could gestate an embryo to term. A version on an ectopic pregnancy could work without a uterus being present however ectopic pregnancies are usually terminated one way or another as the embryo rarely survives. Another hurdle is, unless you started hormones early enough to have "genuinely female" hips, the likelyhood of successfully giving birth is very, very low. "Male hips" simply lack the correct structure to allow a featus to pass through. It would almost certainly have to be a Caesarian birth. Currently it's simply too dangerous. Not so much for the mother as it if for the child. To the point that (in my mind at least) its a series of unfair risks to needlessly place on the health of a baby. 20 years or so, who knows? With stem cell and cloning technologies advancing perhaps they'll be able to give us "proper" hips and bio-identical internal female reproductive structures.
Like Keaira I fathered a child with a cis-woman. After he was born, she left me, and we shared custody. I have to say breast pumping made it possible for me to share feeding my infant son, so we are very bonded. And, I also want to hold every baby I see - not that I get to that much.
One of the aha moments that helped start transitioning was realizing that I actually was depressed at never being able to get pregnant and give birth - in spite of everything I experienced second hand. My son's mother's labor was 36 hours. I was there the whole time as her breathing coach.
I am grateful to be a co-parent of my son, and I will always feel the lack of bearing a child.
I really want to be pregnant :(
Just get a dog and put it in a pouch
Quote from: batgirl on January 21, 2012, 02:15:20 AM
I really want to be pregnant :(
Just get a dog and put it in a pouch
meaning?
Quote from: batgirl on January 21, 2012, 02:15:20 AM
I really want to be pregnant :(
Just get a dog and put it in a pouch
That is kind of a confusing thing to say, care to elaborate?
I was just being silly. I wish i could get pregnant too. It's the most painful part of my disporia:(
Occasionally somtimes.
I usually discourage such thoughts in myself by reminding myself about the logistics of raising a child (Presumebly on my own at my current time in my life) but those ideas are usually counterbalanced by the hypothetical if such a thing were to somehow happen to me I could never say no :/
If I ever get into a stable long term relationship I'm sure it will be a more difficult ache to ignore.
I used to think i was alone in this thought, guess i'm not. I also used to have dreams of at least being able to have my own children through pregnancy but ah, it sucks but it's not life or death (to me anyway).