For me it was myself per usual
I thought I was spooning up some black beans to add to my soup, luckily I noticed I had a spoon full of olives before things went incredibly wrong :laugh:
The containers look the same, maybe I should label them? :laugh:
What made you laugh today?
Trolls.
And songs about cats.
Something that was said at the TransParents group this morning, but now I can't remember what it was. I can only remember that I LOL'd.
A line from The L Word.
Jenny: Go f* yourself.
Dawn Denbo: Now why would I do that when I could f* you?
Jenny: You are so tacky...*whispers* I think she's psychotic, what do I do?
It's probably funnier to hear Mia Kirshner say it in her awesome voice.
Well written fanfiction. And my zucchini. I forget exactly what was said, but he always makes me laugh.
My daughter. I'm sure I'm a bad person for laughing, but she stands out like a neon sign wherever we go, and she's totally oblivious. Nobody can figure her out, myself included. She does this really high pitched wordless singing thing when no one's talking to her, and she dresses in outlandishly fancy outfits, and she's really serious all the time, and she talks like a dictionary, and she usually has a stuffed animal with her. She reassures everybody that it isn't real and won't hurt them. I have to watch her closely, because she talks to everyone like she knows them. I came out of the bathroom at the store today and she was bragging to the staff about the "pretty money" her dad gave her (dollar coins), and about her kitty doll who has a real collar, and about the book that her cat picked out, etc. One long happy runon sentence. This kid is twelve, and more intelligent than I am.
Living with her is insane. It's not all violence and misery, but it is all absurd. :laugh:
I never laugh at the way people say things, but one of my professors said "The Gaps" (referring to the store, The Gap) and I broke out into this like...half smile bordering on a laugh and fortunately it didn't become one. I don't know why it was that funny, actually.
Quote from: Caseyyy on February 02, 2012, 06:58:19 AM
I never laugh at the way people say things, but one of my professors said "The Gaps" (referring to the store, The Gap) and I broke out into this like...half smile bordering on a laugh and fortunately it didn't become one. I don't know why it was that funny, actually.
This reminds me of when I attended a job training seminar years ago, I was really tired and couldn't stop yawning, fighting to stay awake :P
The teacher berated me for yawning and then fumbled over his words, I couldn't help but laugh and the whole room erupted in laughter with me :laugh:
The teacher laughed a bit also and said "Now that everyone's awake...
I cracked up while making coffee, just because, reading a blog about Twilight (no, I am not a fan at all) sent me into fits.
I always have a lot to laugh about, but today the funniest thing was a little girl teaching me dance moves she was making up. She made them especially silly so I would look like a fool and her friends had a good giggle at us looking silly, as did I.
Yesterday I went to see 'She Stoops to Conquer' at the National and it was very funny...and (plug) here is a link to my review.
http://grubstreetlodger.blogspot.com/2012/02/review-she-stoops-to-conquer-at.html (http://grubstreetlodger.blogspot.com/2012/02/review-she-stoops-to-conquer-at.html)
Realizing that I'd forgotten to add the question mark when I'd first started this topic :laugh:
Today was hard. I'm not sure that I laughed at anything other than chattery small-talk stuff from my daughter's occupational therapists. I'll read the Onion or something later.
one of my best guy-friends has caused one the best glitches in Fallout 3 ever. I couldn't help but laugh for about 5 minutes as I watch to continue to glitch out the game. The glitch is he is playing a ten-year-old version of the character that one is suppose to be playing and in the game, one doesn't get to play the main game till the character is either 16 or 17 years old.
I laughed at myself when I realized how afraid I was of the police at the courthouse today. XD I'm an idiot. Nobody gets hit or arrested for changing their name. :laugh:
I don't remember if I posted about this, but a few days ago one of my friends asked me if I "tie down my boobs."
Quote from: Caseyyy on February 17, 2012, 11:24:29 PM
I don't remember if I posted about this, but a few days ago one of my friends asked me if I "tie down my boobs."
Zomg thank you. I keep thinking I'm getting too walled-off and cynical. I fell out laughing at this one. :laugh:
Everything.
I was dressed as a mouse and mucking around in a music company boardroom. We had a mad tea party.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fassets.huluim.com%2Fshows%2Fkey_art_american_dad.jpg&hash=12546907f74fc5accd74661fcf017391bfd87fbc)
American Dad (http://www.hulu.com/american-dad) ! It's DISGUSTING and my kids have me watching it all the time !
Quote from: Caseyyy on February 17, 2012, 11:24:29 PM
I don't remember if I posted about this, but a few days ago one of my friends asked me if I "tie down my boobs."
This is it, and I would have replied "Why yes I do, I use motorcycle tiedowns, see."
Haha, glad it could make you laugh. When the girl asked me, I gave her this deer-in-headlights look, and then laughed and said "Uh, not exactly." She's a good ally, like uses the right pronouns and gets that I'm a guy, but when it comes to the "technical" stuff she couldn't be more clueless.
I made the local paper today!
" Local woman tries to cash $5,000 in forged checks, money orders (http://www.times-herald.com/local/Planning----under-way---for-March---convention--2088483) "
Er, lol mixed LINKS up somewhere -
I'm the Republican *imagine that* with the white cap on (hiding a pony-tail)
I got a text message from my daughter saying she'd made it back to university safely, and in that text she put a reference to a silly meme. Well, it made me laugh.
An absolutely brilliant, cover of 'heaven knows I'm miserable now' with a sort of oompa beat by the beautiful south, made me laugh a lot.
Heaven Knows I'm Miserable Now - TBS (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zY_L-Z-DiUo#)
Nicki Minaj. d-d-d-don't let me die young, I just want you to father my young. What the hell kind of rhyme is that?? lmao
Reading some of the threads on here.
Connie made me laugh out loud.
Rodney Dangerfield
"Your so ugly your mamma breast fed you with a straw" Now that ->-bleeped-<-s funny.
Quote from: Gretchen on February 23, 2012, 06:27:22 PM
"Your so ugly your mamma breast fed you with a straw" Now that ->-bleeped-<-s funny.
lol
bad setup but I'm underslept and throwing up everything I eat so I'm just light-headed and cracked out enough that everything makes me laugh. The world is such a silly place. :laugh:
Was watching the big bang theory. I think it is hillarious and I love Sheldon!
also the surreality of everything lately makes me laugh. We have new fire alarms and they rattle the walls and make your ears ring and are just ohmigosh the loudest things ever. There's a deaf guy in the building, so the alarms also have strobe lights. They spent half of yesterday testing those things and even when they'd turn off the sound they'd leave on the strobe lights.
I took a shower in that context, and then I had trouble taking my T shot because I jumped when the alarms would start up. So I stuffed toilet paper in my ears and covered it with a hat and headphones. Sitting around in that getup and underwear all I could think was wow I bet nobody would ever ask for my honored citizen bus ID if they saw this. :laugh:
Then later my kid rattled off a long technical description of some kind of dinosaur while talking to her eye doctor, lots of big words and jargon, and finished the statement with a proud "I have a toy alligator at home." She makes my head spin.
Thinking about that woman who tried to pee on that Clyfford Still painting and then rubbed her butt on it and punched it.
The fire alarms in my house are so loud they don't even sound like anything. It's just pain and vibration. And strobe lights, if you go in the hall or the bathrooms. I googled the local fire marshal to try to learn why exactly do they have to test these things so often, and the snippet on the search page under their FAQ link -
QuotePortland Fire and Rescue (PF&R) does not fill swimming pools ...
Omg I was indignant and adrenalinized but it's hard to be angry and giggling at the same time. They not only got asked that, but they get asked that often enough they put it at the top of their FAQ. :laugh:
Being bundled by 12 kids who squashed me, made us all laugh.
Silly jokes about art and concreted intestines in the pub after.
I've been trying all day to fix a problem with my bank. I overdrafted when I shouldn't have, when I know I budgeted and tracked my spending carefully. Turned out there was an unauthorized charge, further complicated and obfuscated by the intermediary paypal and their lovely habit of attempting the bank transfer over and over. Each transaction was declined but also added to my negative account balance. I got the bank to remove the unauthorized part from my record, but not the authorized part that only bounced because of the funds being tied up illegitimately. I still have to tangle with paypal. And probably report the other company to the Better Business Bureau. Grr.
Anyway, what made me laugh. When I got off the phone a minute ago, I sighed real big and smiled, incredibly relieved to be making some progress. My daughter asked why I looked so happy. I said because I'm working on a problem, and people often feel good when they engage with obstacles even if they don't accomplish anything. My daughter said "You know what else makes people feel good? Puppies." Very matter of fact. She's so cool. :laugh:
Quote from: Caseyyy on February 27, 2012, 10:22:18 PM
So my grandpa was talking about how people should love their trans children...comparing it to disability, which is wrong and ableist, but let's look past that.
He said "you know, you could have one hand, be missing a leg, have Down's Syndrome, you could be Mongolian..." LMAO. I should have asked what Mongolian was actually supposed to be.
Sounds like he is attempting to be supportive in his own somewhat awkward non PC kinda way :) Def. he loves you, and that's the important thing
Yeah when I was a kid my mom worked in a hospital, and I heard the word mongoloid used pretty casually when talking about certain messed-up babies. I'm going to assume that term is no longer in open use by hospital staff. :laugh:
Casey I'm now enjoying imagining that your grandpa also occasionally speaks of "the google." Please don't correct me if I'm wrong. I love old people. :laugh:
(ageism disclaimer: if you have a problem with my othering "old people" then you need to get off my lawn already)
I was around my sister and cousin Sunday and I just felt like screaming out "tentacles" "yaoi" "yuri" "hentai" "lemon" and other anime terms that otakus and people who are into anime would know and I just kept saying them over and over and I shouted them out loud in my neighboorhood that night. My sister then realized what I was saying was probably objectable to her so she told me to stop but I kept going until my 4 year old nephew started saying these terms >.> It was funny while it lasted and I'm still laughing about it metally today.
Quote from: Malachite on February 28, 2012, 01:56:22 AM
I was around my sister and cousin Sunday and I just felt like screaming out "tentacles" "yaoi" "yuri" "hentai" "lemon" and other anime terms that otakus and people who are into anime would know and I just kept saying them over and over and I shouted them out loud in my neighboorhood that night. My sister then realized what I was saying was probably objectable to her so she told me to stop but I kept going until my 4 year old nephew started saying these terms >.> It was funny while it lasted and I'm still laughing about it metally today.
I'm not into anime but I am a creature of my environment so I know those terms.
Which reminds me, The Simpsons made a lemon party reference on a recent episode, and I thought that was not cool. But I spent enough years not following the show that I probably missed plenty of fair warning that they were getting edgier. And maybe I'm just uptight because my kid is so fragile and weird.
A couple days ago she woke up at least an hour before me, and she quietly spent that time online, without asking. I got suspicious because when I awoke I saw that she had propped up a notebook to hide the screen, but lol she doesn't know about history files. Her very first unsupervised foray into the internet left a really funny trail.
I know a 12 year old deserves some privacy, but I think she'll be mature enough to handle it when she's savvy enough to be more believable in her sneakiness. Among other things of course, but that basic level of proficiency and self-control needs to be there.
Quote from: Logan Erik on February 29, 2012, 11:23:33 AM
The house kitties are engaged in fearsome combat.
This made me laugh. Cats are great. :laugh:
Quote from: Logan Erik on February 29, 2012, 11:23:33 AM
The house kitties are engaged in fearsome combat.
Yup, I got a kick out of that too :icon_chuckel:
I was feeling lonely this morning and wanted some "company" so I played Grand Theft Auto and went to their in version strip club to get a few lap dances. They were playing the best song in there "Shes got the Look" (I love getting video game lap dances with that song.) So things were going well and I was getting excited as if it were the real thing when all of a sudden my mom comes in to get some pills because she had a headache. She saw the stripper dancing, dropped the pills and looked at me and I laughed and told her it's for a mission and she slowly walked out and closed the door. My experience was ruined so I just burned the stripper and shot up the place left the club. It was still funny though. This particular stripper was actually more covered than the ones I usually see.
Quote from: Caseyyy on March 02, 2012, 01:51:30 PM
lmao, that's a shame.
One time my dad walked in at the very moment I orgasmed. I managed to conceal it, but...ugh.
Omg how horrible. Did he say anything?
Quote from: Malachite on March 02, 2012, 12:55:48 PM
I was feeling lonely this morning and wanted some "company" so I played Grand Theft Auto and went to their in version strip club to get a few lap dances. They were playing the best song in there "Shes got the Look" (I love getting video game lap dances with that song.) So things were going well and I was getting excited as if it were the real thing when all of a sudden my mom comes in to get some pills because she had a headache. She saw the stripper dancing, dropped the pills and looked at me and I laughed and told her it's for a mission and she slowly walked out and closed the door. My experience was ruined so I just burned the stripper and shot up the place left the club. It was still funny though. This particular stripper was actually more covered than the ones I usually see.
This is great. :laugh:
My mum gave me some home videos of me from the ages of 5-14 or so. I am 6ish at the moment and coming across as a little bit awkward and strange...and I know many awkward and strange kids. But I can read well.
What made me laugh today was just now trying to explain what made me unhappy today. It involved wanting to fistfight a 15 year old special ed kid and being assaulted by a stuffed animal. It's really hard to see what an idiot I am when I'm actively being an idiot.
my cat farted. i laughed.
These images.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2F7ifU7.jpg&hash=fe8d0acf2447b03b33a5a446f43b1f0b7a2b0461)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2F3d96h.jpg&hash=128ddaa2bb7f8a58c95929da3d285e2379272331)
Batman humor.
Watching the looks of incomprehension and then dawning awareness and confusion, on the faces of my fellow students in Gender Studies when I finally outed myself this afternoon. If they can't handle it they definitely need that class.
It was going to happen eventually, so I wanted to control the timing. And I really like messing with people's heads. >:-)
Karen.
Quote from: justmeinoz on March 07, 2012, 04:53:04 AM
Watching the looks of incomprehension and then dawning awareness and confusion, on the faces of my fellow students in Gender Studies when I finally outed myself this afternoon. If they can't handle it they definitely need that class.
It was going to happen eventually, so I wanted to control the timing. And I really like messing with people's heads. >:-)
Karen.
Haha! Yes, I think gender studies could really help this person.
Racism. My daughter was talking about a kid at school, and I didn't recognize the name so she said "oh he's the one with frizzy hair and tan skin." I laughed and said "you mean he's black?" She said something about how he didn't look like other black people, and I said he's probably mixed. She misheard me, and answered "He's not mexican, he doesn't even have a mustache."
Now I'm picturing the guy in a cartoon mariachi band. :D Thing is, she went to a school for awhile that was over 30% hispanic ESL students. Kids are weird.
This prick on Craigslist is so stupid. He made an ad targeting me from my email and say in caps that my name is Maxwell. I don't put my real name on emails so I set up a fake one for this purpose but the odd thing is my fake name is Maxfield so I'm wondering where in the world he got Maxwell from. It made me laugh like wtf. He is also targeting another guy and has posted his phone number and name in his own ad slandering him (that didn't make me laugh). This is why I don't put my number in ads. Idiot.
That image and a few of the comments that follow because of it...especially the "so does mine!" picture. (http://imgur.com/gallery/Ir6tf)
My friend's baby going crazy when his sister made goofy faces and stomped around. It was so funny to see him laugh and giggle over something so silly.
I went to meet with my professor today for our once a week thesis paper discussion. He took one look at me and said "I don't want to see you. I can't criticize anything you're doing. If I can't destroy your drafts it takes the joy out of my life. Go do something irresponsible like a normal 24 year old." :laugh:
I had a convo with my cousin that lead me to me telling her that I was going to purchase a Mr. Limpy and we both laughed about it because she thinks I'm joking.....
Quote from: Lynn Gabriel on March 08, 2012, 10:15:36 PM
My friend's baby going crazy when his sister made goofy faces and stomped around. It was so funny to see him laugh and giggle over something so silly.
Calming the Baby Beast. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BnBau6fL8S8#)
Quote from: Logan Erik on February 29, 2012, 11:23:33 AM
The house kitties are engaged in fearsome combat.
My cats do this nearly everyday. If you were at my house, you'd be laughing a lot.
:o
What made me laugh today shouldn't be funny, but it was so unexpected I had a hard time being serious about it. My daughter got suspended from school, and she goes to a school for kids with issues so getting suspended is pretty hard to do. I asked what she did, and they said she kept licking the teacher. Then her story was that she was really just trying to bite his face. Well then.
Our problems are so weird. :laugh:
This guy on craigslist keeps harrassing and flagging this other guy about his ads so that other guy made 8 duplicate ads and in them he said, "Hey (censored) have fun flagging all these."
A news story about the problem of Israeli cats in heat. :laugh:
I think I confused the poor girl on the phone when I ordered take-out. My voice was already pretty deep pre-T and it's definitely dropped a bit more lately.
Me: *gives order details*
Girl: Can I get a name for the order?
Me: Katherine (ugh)
Girl: Alfred?
Don't know why, but the name Alfred just cracked me up. :D
At school today, former Kosovan refugee: "Does anyone know what seeking asylum is?"
Excitable child with hand up: "Yes! It's the thing they put on top of a police car."
Some of the posts here.
I watched paranormal activity 3. It's a really funny movie if you imagine the ghost as bender from futurama
I was blasting Sailor Moon music in Black Ops and some guy is like "Juda what are you doing man" Juda is my clan tag. Then when the music ended he was like "it stopped.....he must be loading the next horrible track" LOL
My sister's funny lil' teacup terrier :icon_chuckel: Such entertaining antics can not be ignored
Very pleased that someone found my blog by typing in the phrase, 'crossdressing violinist'
Episode 39 of the Sailor Moon Abirdged series
Lesloveboat's ad slogan for packing underwear - "Tired of feeling like there's a science fair down your pants?" :laugh:
My mom called me in her room to see a segment on Dr. Oz talking about tampons and she was like "you need to watch Dr. Oz sometimes. He answers all of your personal medical questions." Immediately when she said that the topic quickly shifted to increasing lubrication in the vagina so it doesn't feel like sand paper sex and she was like "Uh you can go now you don't need to watch this."
When I was wearing the bunny suit I didn't initially put on the feet because it was raining. But little kids kept staring at my sneakers. So I went to get the bunny feet and explained to my friend that I was having trouble passing without them. As a rabbit, I meant, but the phrasing caught me up for a second. ;D
My mother came back from the doctor. She had to take a stress test and I asked her how did she do and she said that exercise bike was hard on her body and she got a 137. I asked her 137 in what and she said, " I don't know." LOL I know it shouldn't be funny but it is so funny. I hope it's good.
Me and my two really good friends were playing fatal frame, and we couldn't help but make nothing but terrible jokes about the ghosts. It turned a normally terrifying game into a giggle fest.
LOL... The surprised and suspicious look in the substitute postman's eyes when I had to sign for a package :laugh: I guess I should get a bit more serious about getting a name change :P
Felix made me laugh today. :D I love the man so much!
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fstatic4.fjcdn.com%2Fthumbnails%2Fcomments%2F%2B_2c94adb02fa8492cca17faee08659193.jpg&hash=8795930b9fcdb2296dd5a7b439a8662823c2c97f)
Tekla's random comments. :laugh:
Finding the bubble-blowing machine my daughter and I assembled a couple years ago. I live upstairs so I set it up to blow bubbles out the window for a bit. I hope it confused somebody. :laugh:
I ran into something earlier, and now I have a bruise shaped exactly like a penis on my thigh.
Walking to the bus stop, a bus stop we've used hundreds of times, my daughter loudly exclaims "look at that tall building!" like it just jumped out of the underbrush or something. :laugh:
the word "unknowingly"
Seeing that word reminds me of the Brenton Butler case where his lawyer ripped the officer's statements to shreds.
"Unknowingly....was that his words or yours?" LOL
*crickets*
Well I guess you had to be there to see it lol.
Noticing the speckles of egg dye on the kitchen chair. :)
it wasn't today, but my chem prof played Rebecca Black's "Friday" to describe a chemical reaction
Quote from: Lee on April 10, 2012, 02:01:46 AM
I ran into something earlier, and now I have a bruise shaped exactly like a penis on my thigh.
AHAHAHAHAHAHAH xD
Quote from: Felix on April 07, 2012, 11:16:56 PM
Finding the bubble-blowing machine my daughter and I assembled a couple years ago. I live upstairs so I set it up to blow bubbles out the window for a bit. I hope it confused somebody. :laugh:
BUBBLESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS they never fail to make me happy =D
I was digging through old email trying to find something, and I found this:
Quoteleah and i just had a conversation about oprah, and she whispered in
awe "not even Space Ghost could beat her up!"
I went to the supermarket and the trolley return guy (who may not be the most intellectually gifted person, but he is a hard working guy who does his job) was having problems getting two sets of trolleys into the door, mainly because five idiot 15-16 yrs old were sitting on the floor in front of the door. Oh how macho they looked. He was trying hard to miss their legs and they were being big boys and ignoring his effort. I just said I'll take this set and grabbed a set of trolleys and went right over their legs, the first one screamed, it was only three trolleys, Geez what a wimp, the second panicked the other three got up and moved, he was ecstatic. If he had done it they would have reported him. They had left by the time I came out. Felt pretty damn good.
Macho Cindy
Quote from: Cindy James on April 14, 2012, 03:59:01 AM
I went to the supermarket and the trolley return guy (who may not be the most intellectually gifted person, but he is a hard working guy who does his job) was having problems getting two sets of trolleys into the door, mainly because five idiot 15-16 yrs old were sitting on the floor in front of the door. Oh how macho they looked. He was trying hard to miss their legs and they were being big boys and ignoring his effort. I just said I'll take this set and grabbed a set of trolleys and went right over their legs, the first one screamed, it was only three trolleys, Geez what a wimp, the second panicked the other three got up and moved, he was ecstatic. If he had done it they would have reported him. They had left by the time I came out. Felt pretty damn good.
Macho Cindy
Cindy that is beautiful. ;D
My daughter calls those guys "cartherds" btw.
watching people in earthcams live
A little before closing, a guy was giving his girlfriend crap and then he said that I was hotter than her. She asked me if I wanted a boyfriend, but I told her "No thanks, I already have a dog." That made both of us laugh, him, not so much, lol.
Quote from: Cindy James on April 14, 2012, 03:59:01 AM
I went to the supermarket and the trolley return guy (who may not be the most intellectually gifted person, but he is a hard working guy who does his job) was having problems getting two sets of trolleys into the door, mainly because five idiot 15-16 yrs old were sitting on the floor in front of the door. Oh how macho they looked. He was trying hard to miss their legs and they were being big boys and ignoring his effort. I just said I'll take this set and grabbed a set of trolleys and went right over their legs, the first one screamed, it was only three trolleys, Geez what a wimp, the second panicked the other three got up and moved, he was ecstatic. If he had done it they would have reported him. They had left by the time I came out. Felt pretty damn good.
Macho Cindy
Auntie Cindy strikes again!
Quote from: Jaime on April 14, 2012, 10:43:02 PM
A little before closing, a guy was giving his girlfriend crap and then he said that I was hotter than her. She asked me if I wanted a boyfriend, but I told her "No thanks, I already have a dog." That made both of us laugh, him, not so much, lol.
Classic ;D
A silly Livewire sketch about penguins. :)
seeing that I got this as change:
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi1207.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fbb464%2Fkaelsleeps%2FPhoto-0493-1.jpg&hash=0ccb9a80e6ce112116c981d8210246330955d8bd)
I'm so easily pleased. :D
Quote from: Felix on April 15, 2012, 09:08:10 PM
seeing that I got this as change:
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi1207.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fbb464%2Fkaelsleeps%2FPhoto-0493-1.jpg&hash=0ccb9a80e6ce112116c981d8210246330955d8bd)
I'm so easily pleased. :D
(Oops, clicked the wrong button) Sorry Felix
LOL... That made me laugh too :laugh: Haven't seen that one before
This morning a regular-sized yellow school bus drove by and my daughter pointed and said "Whoa! Look how long that bus is!" I think it's awesome that she sees no stigma in riding the short bus. :laugh:
Quote from: V M on April 15, 2012, 09:17:52 PM
(Oops, clicked the wrong button) Sorry Felix
LOL... That made me laugh too :laugh: Haven't seen that one before
Neither have I, lol
Going outside to check on the doggy a little bit ago to see if he wanted in yet and he was just sitting there on one of the porch swings, swinging back and forth. Had a cute little contented look on his face too.
2 certain locked topics from a while back on this site-I keep going back to them when I need a good laugh. I can just feel the frustation in them.
I was looking up the question where route does a bill take and someone said straight to hell
Sephirah talking about superman and Sephirah talking about Horticultural Fight Club.
I laughed on purpose just to post in this thread.....
I've been waiting for like half an hour for some water to boil, checked it I don't know how many times and finally, just now, I noticed that I had barely even turned the stove on, lol.
getting old...
Caught myself looking at a cisgirl and being jealous of how easily she could transition if she felt like it. Lol. Forgot to be jealous of regular guys today. ;D
I went to the convienence store to buy a MEGAMILLIONS ticket
There was a new cashier there who informed me that he hadn't been trained on the LOTTO machine yet... WHAT?!?!?! :o
LOL... No problem, I just instructed him how to do it :laugh:
I thought that funny anyway
Malachite's posts, they really are a hoot and a half ^o^
Quote from: JayKyle on April 24, 2012, 09:30:37 PM
Malachite's posts, they really are a hoot and a half ^o^
Lol ^ This made me laugh on the inside today. I really needed it.
Curious though, which posts?
Quote from: Malachite on April 24, 2012, 09:40:57 PM
Lol ^ This made me laugh on the inside today. I really needed it.
Curious though, which posts?
*hugs* I'm glad it helped. And most of them. You're very random and amusing and I guess I'm simple minded enough that it entertains me greatly ^.^
Actually one of your posts made me laugh in public today. I went to subway and got juice with my sandwhich and it reminded me of how juice makes you happy, which was really funny at the time, and I couldn't stop laughing. I think I might have scared several people '^^
Quote from: JayKyle on April 24, 2012, 09:47:36 PM
*hugs* I'm glad it helped. And most of them. You're very random and amusing and I guess I'm simple minded enough that it entertains me greatly ^.^
Actually one of your posts made me laugh in public today. I went to subway and got juice with my sandwhich and it reminded me of how juice makes you happy, which was really funny at the time, and I couldn't stop laughing. I think I might have scared several people '^^
Oooo I see what you mean. Aside from transition stuff there isn't much on my mind so it probably comes from that lol.
Quote from: Malachite on April 24, 2012, 10:04:36 PM
Oooo I see what you mean. Aside from transition stuff there isn't much on my mind so it probably comes from that lol.
Eh but it still great and makes my day. I love RANDOMNESS!
Quote from: JayKyle on April 24, 2012, 10:10:38 PM
Eh but it still great and makes my day. I love RANDOMNESS!
Glad to hear that. Me too. :) Thanks! ::)
Quote from: Malachite on April 24, 2012, 10:13:43 PM
Glad to hear that. Me too. :) Thanks! ::)
No problem, anytime! (I now have this sudden urge to watch anime on crack.....youtube time!)
I went to library orientation today and I got a little nervous when they mentioned I'd have to have a background check if I work around children. I was trying to decide if it was time to out myself, but they interpreted my unease as meaning I had a criminal record. Lol it made me feel like a grizzly outlaw. ;D
Grunt's Birthday Party and rediculous ragdoll effects
One of my best friends, made me laugh today :D. Somehow, she, always makes me do that. Despite me, having a horrible day. She is very very good at that, I am very grateful for that ;D.
Random posts
My transit-fu wasn't so great today so I was racing the clock to get home in time to meet the school bus. At one point I was on a packed streetcar, and my legs were hurting so I was holding with both hands onto the overhead bar and trying to keep most of the weight off my feet. Some guy kept looking at my belly and giving me dirty looks, and I couldn't figure what it was about so I just ignored it.
I got off at my stop and started rearranging my bags and noticed that my belt buckle had broken and the belt was hanging open. It looked all wrong. :laugh:
Quote from: Felix on April 27, 2012, 11:14:56 PM
I got off at my stop and started rearranging my bags and noticed that my belt buckle had broken and the belt was hanging open. It looked all wrong. :laugh:
LOL... Reminds me of the time most of the buttons on my button fly Levi's had come undone and people were gawking at what they could see of my pink with black butterfly undies :laugh:
I went and bought a new pair :icon_redface: of Levi's
Quote from: V M on April 27, 2012, 11:55:14 PM
LOL... Reminds me of the time most of the buttons on my button fly Levi's had come undone and people were gawking at what they could see of my pink with black butterfly undies :laugh:
I went and bought a new pair :icon_redface: of Levi's
That helps. Thank you. :)
Watching Keara trying to get away from jake while he's getting all spastic with excitement and jumping all over the place and on her, lol.
The absurdity of piles of paper ducks.
Decepticons
A customer tried to tell me there was a bald headed rat in the bathroom today at work. I told him not to worry, it was probably just the mirror he saw.
That'll teach him to mess with me, I hope, lol.
Quote from: Jaime on April 28, 2012, 11:14:43 PM
A customer tried to tell me there was a bald headed rat in the bathroom today at work. I told him not to worry, it was probably just the mirror he saw.
That'll teach him to mess with me, I hope, lol.
LOL... That is sooooo terrible!!! >:-) But it made me laugh too
Quote from: V M on April 28, 2012, 11:23:23 PM
LOL... That is sooooo terrible!!! >:-) But it made me laugh too
Oh, I often have fun with some customers at work. Tonight I was telling some of them we were out of something, usually the kind of cigarettes they smoke and the look of despair on their face would tickle me, then I'd tell them I was just kidding or they would see what they wanted in the background and then the flash of relief on their face, lol. I'm careful not to do stuff like that to the aholes that come in there though. I can also be quite a smarta** too, but I'm pretty sure that's genetic.
Sailor Moon Abridged series.
Knock Out...and praise Primus he's back! I almost thought Hasbro forgot about him
A little girl at the store pointing at me and blurting rather loudly... "Look mommy!!! That big lady over there is sick!!!"
Quote from: V M on April 30, 2012, 09:41:59 PM
A little girl at the store pointing at me and blurting rather loudly... "Look mommy!!! That big lady over there is sick!!!"
Omg I shouldn't find it funny too but I lol'd. :laugh: My daughter pointed at a guy yesterday and said too loudly "Look daddy that guy is short just like you!" Not near as funny but the same childlike guilelessness. XD
LOL... The little angels can sure be a kick in the pants sometimes :laugh:
My dog had to take her snack outside with her. I gave her the snack before leaving for school and she hadn't touched it for a good 5 hours -- she had to wait for me. Then she took it outside, set it on the ground, used the restroom, picked the snack back up and ate it when she was back in the apartment. It was silly.
Dark humor. I was speaking to a fellow comrade online and she asked me how much will all my surgeries cost and I gave her a ballpark estimate and she told me that I better start selling more on Craigslist. She speaks the truth though.
My dad was grumbling about how his brother likes to give him crap and jokingly tease him, and he said "It's such a guy thing to do, like punching each other, and it seems stupid." What's funny about this is that he does it to me all the time.
Also, as he was walking out the door I tossed him the last cookie and said "It's dangerous to go alone. Take this." He didn't appreciate the humor, but hey I think I'm funny.
(I feel a bit guilty for laughing about this)
One of my new neighbors got a new 'puppy' and wanted me to come see it :) Okay, but when we went to her place she couldn't find the dog
Finally she happily announces that the dog is in her room, but just as I go to look I notice that it is a small full grown older dog which proceeds over to puke in one of her shoes... Then I notice that the dog has also gone diarrhea near the closet
I go get some cleaning supplies from my place and clean up the shoe and carpet near the closet :) Okay, but then I mention that she may want to consider another pet
So then I get my ears blasted with a row of profanity and told to go to hell for even entertaining such an idea
I just smiled and wished her luck :laugh:
Roger Pushes Over Bike (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4_0OpOzndwQ#)
Sooooo gpoy.
A pit bull dog riding a rocking horse on the Late Night with David Letterman Show
Republican Space Rangers
@JoeyD hahahahaha that's great. I love American Dad ^o^
Watching the sprinklers run during a hail/rain storm :laugh:
Kookaburras going off like demented hyenas at 7:30 this morning.
Buying a pair of large silver hooped ear rings and telling the guy in the shop that I would wear them away. I was dressed fully as me but not wearing a wig and just basic foundation so I got lots of looks. I'm really enjoying that. I really need that experience and dealing with it, and I am. Good fun.
Loved it
Cindy
A call from an old friend which has a problem with my ex boyfriend relating into her boyfriend getting into a physical fight with him
I mean I found it pretty funny because I haven't talk to her because we had some problems then she calls me when she needs help for her boyfriend not to get hurt , sorry dear not my problem ^^
revenge time :D
Nikki
Just finished watching "Asterix and Obelix take on Caesar" in French. Tres drole!
Pastor Kelly (and he looks just like my dad OoO)
I'm happy. That makes me laugh.
My dream about spoiling fun for others.
Gamer humor....
"We're geeky and we know it"
Quote from: Liam Erik on May 10, 2012, 12:44:16 PM
I'm watching the cat move slowly along a shelf - he stares intently at each thing he comes across, sniffs it, pokes it, and deliberately pushes it off onto the floor. Next thing, stare at it, sniff, poke, and push off. He seems quite pleased with himself.
I had a cat who was the exact opposite. She would delicately walk around everything on table tops and such, leaving it completely undisturbed. I could practically stand a pen on end and she wouldn't knock it over. If she weren't so affectionate, she'd have made an excellent assassin.
People's write in votes- I'm voting for Sailor Moon when it comes down to the presidental election. She and the Sailor Scouts are the only ones who can save us now.
Quote from: casey on May 11, 2012, 10:43:02 PM
My packer was labelled (on the package, for border crossing) as "rubber novelty item."
Hahahaha that is too great!
The thought how my gg gf would look fixing HER washing machine (topless!) like it came to pass for me today. Thankfully I got it fixed, but gosh these items ARE heavy!!! I got so sweaty and hot I just took my top off.
It went right back into the thing once it worked again. My gf is a 36D... it still makes me giggle to think "a picture for the Gods" crawling topless behind those appliances. Appliance-Mechanics are better served with A cups - methinks :)
So I guess she'd rather would have used the call out service... and just having to wait for Monday.
Sometimes it helps being able to help yourself (topless or not).
Quote from: casey on May 12, 2012, 07:18:44 PM
LOL, and today while in my room my mom tripped on my "rubber novelty item" (I was a tad careless and didn't expect her to come around), and she just looks at it and says "...good grief." :|
I hate when that happens! :D
Me: "What am I looking for?"
My dad: "It's big, black, and looks like a dildo."
I found it soon after, and that was a pretty good description.
Quote from: casey on May 13, 2012, 03:29:25 PM
Haha! I wish someone in my family would say something like this to me. What was the item?
ROFL, same here, what is this mystical item you quested for?!
It's the thing in the ring on the front of this. (A ring clamp for jewelry making)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Ftoolmonger.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2010%2F02%2Fbenchmate-basic-package.jpg&hash=a5f2111dd183d95285bf8d15e7c16d0d1ef67c1e)
Added bonus: It's made by GRS Tools. On their front page was something else dildo-shaped, and it said "More power than any other GRS handpiece!" My mind went in the gutter...
My cousin said that "recite" is a big word.
A guy I recently slept with suddenly deciding and announcing to the world that he is gay.. He's about as gay as my left foot.. :laugh:
Quote from: kelly_aus on May 14, 2012, 06:43:56 AM
A guy I recently slept with suddenly deciding and announcing to the world that he is gay.. He's about as gay as my left foot.. :laugh:
One way for a straight male to get out of a realtionship unscathed.
I'm sure you have heard that, eh? :)
Next thing you see him with someone else and he be, ah BI...?
Life, um.
Axelle
My cat rediscovering the couch....and its been there for years...
Guys trying to look down my top at the store
My sister popped round to visit and I haven't seen her since the e-blockers I'm on have started to take effect. The first thing she said to me was "holy crap since when do you have acne?"
It's noticable then sis? :laugh: Don't feel like you have to sugarcoat it
She's lucky I shaved that morning or she would have had to take in a ridiculous looking puberty 'stash as well
the British TV show show Faulty Towers
gif of a sheep ramming a guy into a lake. ;D
http://imgur.com/gallery/ppVdI (http://imgur.com/gallery/ppVdI)
Margaret Court, retired tennis player, evangelical preacher, and now apparently idiot claiming that heterosexual marriage is the only legitimate form as, "Adam and Eve were married. It is in the Bible."
That literally left me speechless.
Karen.
All the looks I got this afternoon, wearing a short black knit dress, black hose and red 3" heeled calve high boots. My hair up as usual.
It gave me some un-suppressible giggles, how mostly guys tried look at my legs - and try not to let on, lest there female partners would notice... :)
It's not the first time of course, and if it gets that much as was today, one gets these 'celebrity feelings'. It was REALLY laughable, but in a very good way of course :)
Axélle
My son is sitting in a mixing bowl and spinning around.
Couple things. My doctor's office's exaggerated use of gendered language was one. Being greeted as "mister dude" made me giggle.
The other thing was that my grumpy mood and rude behavior today was taken seriously by no one, because early this morning on my way out I purchased a large stuffed pig for my daughter at a garage sale. It didn't fit in my bag so I carried it all day. Lol. No matter how pissed off and mean I got, everybody smiled and said nice things. Stupid pig. :laugh:
LOL... Gotta love stuffed pigs 'Mr. Dude' :laugh:
What made me laugh? Guys trying to look down my top the past few days :laugh: Warm weather...
Go figure
Also, I called a guy an A-hole!!! after he nearly hit me on my bike... He stopped his car and got out and was looking confrontational but then suddenly stopped in his tracks and said...
"Sorry ma'am" and got in his car and left
My dad again. As we were looking through art nouveau pattern books he smiled and said "Gotta love a style where naked women are the norm."
Saying:
"Aww....that's so sweet." in a girly voice and in the same breath, "now ->-bleeped-<-."
>> Yaoi anime...brings out the worst in me.
Hearing the word "bananatown" used as a synonym for craziness. Yay.
My son was laughing maniacally on the bus this morning. Seriously, it sounded like "AHhahahahaha! AHahahaha!"
Yep. That's my boy. I'm so proud. ;D
Okay, it wasn't today and I've been struggling about whether to put this in the "What are you thinking?" thread. My friend went on a total rant about what he would do if he had a vagina. Though it was really funny, it seemed kind of sincere, like he's really given this some thought, though I certainly don't consider him trans in any fashion. Was struggling with some thoughts about it:
1) It might be offensive or triggering to some people. Like I said, these aren't serious thoughts of possibly being trans and I really don't want to upset anyone. It was fairly adult in nature.
2) It's got my friend's podcast URL plastered all over it so it also might be seen as an ad. He was just testing the cameras and mics before his show and we were just doing silly stream of consciousness stuph and it happened to get recorded so he put it up on YouTube.
He basically went off about how he would be tempted to put all manner of objects into it out of curiosity and then started pointing things out around the room. Then my other friend asked why he doesn't feel the same temptation to put his penis into various things and he explained how it's not the same. If you want to see it and don't think it would be triggering and you're not easily offended, maybe PM me. >:-)
watching noahwagoner on youtube (a trans guy) dancing/signing to Baby by JB and Down by Jay Sean for his ASL final
The Big Bang Theory.
:)
Quote from: bballshorty on May 23, 2012, 07:50:19 PM
watching noahwagoner on youtube (a trans guy) dancing/signing to Baby by JB and Down by Jay Sean for his ASL final
Ohhh... Noah is a heart-breaker.
Reading the mod log on another forum, only if people know what the powers that be crap on about it's always good for a morning laugh, then realising I have no milk cause I forgot to get it 3 days in a row....
Quote from: Felix on May 18, 2012, 08:55:02 PM
Couple things. My doctor's office's exaggerated use of gendered language was one. Being greeted as "mister dude" made me giggle.
The other thing was that my grumpy mood and rude behavior today was taken seriously by no one, because early this morning on my way out I purchased a large stuffed pig for my daughter at a garage sale. It didn't fit in my bag so I carried it all day. Lol. No matter how pissed off and mean I got, everybody smiled and said nice things. Stupid pig. :laugh:
Reading Felix's post =P
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.incredibomb.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2010%2F07%2Fshroom.jpg&hash=fbf91e29bce636dbac1397139763354b5e353513)
My son takes tae kwon do. His Master is Korean, and teaches the kids some Korean. Today he was quizzing the kids on what they new. He asked "Who can say how are you Master in Korean?". My son, who is 6 and only speaks English and German, promptly raised his hand. When he was called on him, he proudly said "How are you Master... in Korean". It took all I could not to break out in laughter. His Master even laughed.
Hot Tub Time Machine
That movie is HIGH-larious!
Quote from: Casey on May 30, 2012, 09:33:50 PM
My grandma just told me that when I was like 3, I was learning to talk, and every time my aunt Ria came over I'd chant "DIA...RIA! DIA...RIA!" and laugh hysterically. I can't believe that woman still loves me, lol.
Roflmao... That's so messed up and so funny at the same time!!! :laugh:
Casey's post.
On the bus home, the window was open and my son waved and called out "Hi!" to everyone we passed.
Issac's lunatic dead girlriend hallucenation in Dead Space 2
While making lunch for the 8-year-old I was babysitting, she told me the following joke:
"What do you call a panda on a candelabra? A PANDALABRA!"
Adorable ;D
http://26.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_l9mx6mIuhd1qael6bo1_500.jpg (http://26.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_l9mx6mIuhd1qael6bo1_500.jpg)
Heheh
My dad was telling me that at the airport in Canada a guy was asking him the usual questions (name, why you're there, etc) and went on to "Who was Dudley Doright's arch nemesis?" Dad got it right (Snidely Whiplash), and the guy let him in.
Because I am a bad person, I laughed at my daughter jumping behind a newspaper box to hide from the guy in the OSU beaver mascot suit when the convertable carrying him drove by in the children's parade today. Lol. She also hid from a wolverine and a "trailcat" (yes we have a trailcat and it is indeed stupid). The clowns didn't bother her.
Also, she really wants a sousaphone. I'm not sure why, but that makes me laugh too.
When I laugh in front of her I usually make like it's about something else. I'm not mean. Well, I am mean, but that's not how it manifests.
While walking across the office this morning, a coworker and I greeted each other politely.
But, he was staring at my chest when he said, "Good morning."
As the bulk of my bosom is still prosthetic, it made me laugh.
Noticing the Yuri moment in Sailor Moon between Usagi and Rei when Rei was dying
Rei: "You still have Mamarou"
Usagi: "....No......NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
lol
This:
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fcdnimg.visualizeus.com%2Fthumbs%2F26%2Fb6%2Fclever%2Cfunny%2Ckeep%2Ccalm%2Cposter-26b61c393828fb7c0b78c0ea1fbebcc6_h.jpg&hash=baa3437e2c6fa1cada0fda88a1595e465568a694)
When I opened the loungeroom blinds this morning there were about a dozen Yellow Fronted Honeyeaters chasing each other around in the bush near the window. Cute. :)
Toddler kisses. They involved a lot of slobber and were kinda gross, but he was so cute. (By kinda, I mean slobber all over my face and glasses.)
Someone compared a preacher they believe is a false prophet to Mr. Krabs
I watched this video with my daughter -
YACHT - Psychic City (Voodoo City) (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MI6xNf4tMcs#)
and at the end when they kiss and the girl licks the boy's face, my daughter says "she's pretending to be a boy." I asked her what that meant. She explained to me that facelicking is a boy's role. I asked her when she had ever seen a boy do that, or anyone for that matter. She told me she saw a boy at school licking girls' faces.
I have enough trouble worrying about any gender confusion I might cause that I forget that kids are weird even without my help. ;D
Quote from: Felix on June 14, 2012, 01:22:05 AM
... I forget that kids are weird even without my help. ;D
THIS made me laugh.
I'm mentally laughing because I am about to type Nyan Nyan Nyan Nyan constantly at another site to make those people made.
Our lovely PM Julia trying to tell the EU how to run there economy the Australian way...
I just read an email from a cousin describing what it's like to be queer in Houston, Texas.
Aunty Cindy's Lovely Abuse Advice for me
My sister sitting on top of me twisting my leg above my head and giving me a wedgie...
It hurt but I laughed :icon_neutral:
The TV in the lunch room is playing the Euro Cup. Not only has the lunch room been more crowded than usual lately, the folks watching the match are really getting into it. It's not every day I hear cheering and screaming in the office.
I decided to buy some Ricola cough drops because my prescription won't be ready 'till tomorrow
So when I check out the cashier asks me if I want a bag and I say no, I can just put that in my pack :) Well the zipper on the pack gets stuck and I have to force it open... When it finally pops open a Kotex pad flips up in the air and the cashier catches it :icon_redface: She looked a bit surprised for a second and then smiled and handed it to me and said "That's okay hon, we all have day like that"
My son called me a tractor. :D
My manager told me today that the other store clerk complained that I was lollygagging about rather than relieving her early since I always go in a little early and do a couple things on my own time so it makes my shift a little easier since its annoying to do some things while also dealing with customers. I got a good laugh about it. All she wanted was more time to sit on her ass, she's not going to leave any earlier if I do relieve her early.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FXlLzR.jpg&hash=8116e4a60303d61545f45adce59250a9c345e9e2)
Chumlee on Pawn Stars
"No one said it had to be correct."
LOL!
This commercial has been making me laugh for quite awhile :laugh:
State Farm® - State Of Disconnect (Journey) (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jriGDrB41nA#)
Quote from: Papa Taco on July 05, 2012, 04:57:08 AM
Her expressions were absolutely priceless, lol. She's not the easiest to gross out but there were a lot of "ewwwwws" and "nooooooooos." :P
Your face showed a lot of horror as you tried to identify food that had been in the fridge since 1812. That was funny! :P
Watching how the doggy is reacting to one of my brothers staying over at my house. There hasn't been any overnight visitors since over a year ago when I got him. He's fine with him until he goes upstairs and then he'll go into the spare room up there, check him out, run out, go back, growl, jump on the bed, sniff, sniff, jump off, run out, growl and repeat.
He's guarding the stairs right now while he's taking a shower, lol.
KrisRix from Sailor Moon Abridged
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Ftomdanvers.com%2Flabs%2Fmordorviabank%2Fmordor_via_bank.jpg&hash=c440d684bc63cb54c78ac823de50a65c43543f51)
My dad was sitting in a chair with a square of fabric over the top of it. He then stood up and unknowingly walked around for a while with it stuck to him like a miniature cape. I was laughing too hard to explain what was so funny.
Quote from: Papa Taco on June 28, 2012, 07:47:52 PM
I was talking to one of the admins for my program a few minutes ago, and a past classmate of mine who is apparently applying for the Master's program came in. She was very anti-transition, and openly disrespectful of my new name/pronouns...and says "Kate, my girl! I've missed you, what's up?"
The admin stands up, without a pause, and starts singing, to the tune of that "my Name is Kay" song:
You don't know what his name is! You don't know what his name is!
His name is CA-A-A-A-A-LEB
C-A-A-A-A-LEB
Did you just call him Kate when you know he is Caleb?
That's what's up, that's what's up, that's what's sss-sup.
She even did the little dance. And the look on the girl's face was PRICELESS.
This is superb.
This Facebook status:
"See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time."
Quote from: dalebert on July 09, 2012, 12:19:14 PM
This Facebook status:
"See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time."
I saw that on my feed too!
Is it a cosmic coincidence?
Quote from: Adam1 on July 09, 2012, 12:31:10 PM
Is it a cosmic coincidence?
Probably just a popular meme at the moment.
"You people"
My son came up to me with a box on his head.
Watching a large Wattle Bird hang upside down on a branch feeding on nectar from the first Bottlebrush I have seen flower this year.
This happened yesterday, actually..
I was in a rush to get to work, having slept in, so I skipped shaving.. While in the ladies, another woman says to me, 'Don't worry about the facial hair, I get it too, my electrolysist is a wonder..' And no, she isn't trans - she is obviously pregnant..
Nice One Kel!
I'm taking the PCAT in a week, so for the past month or so every time my dad sees me he shouts "Go study!" I asked him what he's going to do after next week. He said it will be "Go find a job!" After I get a job it will be "Go apply to schools!" After I get in it will be "Go study!"
I'm dooooomed!
My Iguana's reaction to watermelon bits :laugh:
Quote from: kelly_aus on July 12, 2012, 05:50:48 AM
This happened yesterday, actually..
I was in a rush to get to work, having slept in, so I skipped shaving.. While in the ladies, another woman says to me, 'Don't worry about the facial hair, I get it too, my electrolysist is a wonder..' And no, she isn't trans - she is obviously pregnant..
I think that is a pass :laugh:
Sugar+ADD+sister might be getting a job
In a crosswalk with a middle-class, middle-aged couple walking a black labrador (rush hour, two bars caddy-corner to a grocery store) the dog decides to just lay down and make himself comfortable. The dog wasn't tired or ill or anything. All kindsa wrong and lol and win. ;D
I found a crossover comic of Sailor Moon and Hellsing. I thought it was funny when Alucard turned out to be Tuxedo Mask. Then "Sailor Regenerator" showed up. So wrong, but so funny.
I found out that when setting up my computer years ago my brother named it "FluffyBunnyComp."
Driving down I-40, I passed a semi truck pulling a Prime Inc trailer that said "Prime job" on the back of it...my mind immeadiately put
Optimus Prime+BJ=Prime Job
roflmao XDD
I think I have established a perminant residence in the gutter
Quote from: Lee on July 17, 2012, 02:29:49 PM
I found out that when setting up my computer years ago my brother named it "FluffyBunnyComp."
lol, fluffybunny has been the password to get into my home wireless for several years.
Quote from: crazy old bat on July 17, 2012, 10:44:01 PM
lol, fluffybunny has been the password to get into my home wireless for several years.
Haha good choice. Ours is "Crudmuffins".... Also set by my brother.
how simple my mind can be sometimes...or is that just hysteria?
Indescribable blatant worldwide hypocrisy and...
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fsansscience.files.wordpress.com%2F2012%2F02%2Fspam.jpg&hash=3e791aaeea201866e15fc1a1da239935cf118545)
I was looking in a Sailor Moon forum that takes about the scout they hate the most and why and this comment always gets to me:
"I hate Sailor Saturn because she's stupid!"
No explanation at all.....just clear cut.
LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL
Nnoitra in all his spoony glory.
Nnoitra fires his laser/kicks a baby 0_o (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W1eXtnLgcwI#)
Also...
Ulquiorra: Lose the caffeine, Grimmjow.
(When asked who hates Ichigo the most)
Ulquiorra: I'm just trying to get a pay check.
Aizen: Welcome to Taco Aizen. May I take your order? Would you like the espada nachos?
Ulquiorra: I'd like a Hueco Mundo enchilada please.
Grimmjow: Burrito? That is so pathetic. I want a taco!
Quote from: edderkopp on July 29, 2012, 04:41:17 AM
I told her she couldn't do it. She proved me wrong, I ate my words:
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi1161.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fq510%2Fclbrosh%2FScreenshot2012-07-29at32911AM.png&hash=588df9af4086925742f6840d8ccc57c4d5e2807b)
Yes I did! :P
Haruka and Miichiru Parodies
Quote from: edderkopp on July 30, 2012, 01:54:37 PM
You know you've got to link me, don't you? ;)
Indeed comrade indeed. :) I'll pm you the links of my personal favorites. ;)
Sent even though I forgot some. >.>
Bill Cosby on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon.
Getting used to having a cat. We were gone most of today and when we got home Professor Cuddlesworth plopped himself down right on top of my cellphone and computer mouse like he knew exactly what he was doing. Cats are funny.
Quote from: edderkopp on August 01, 2012, 10:54:16 PM
;D lol. nice.
Thank you. He's a very dignified older fellow so I felt like he should have a title.
So. I'd said at one point that he wasn't playful. He's old and traumatized but he does apparently play sometimes. Today he launched himself at my crotch, hunting at my pajama drawstrings. Took me pretty off guard. :laugh:
I do wonder how (and if) he thinks of me gender-wise.
As usual random Sailor Moon nonsense has made me laugh.
For example I have a comforter on my bed and it's ripped in certain places because I have nails sticking out of my mattress. I was trying to figure out how the to divide the scouts to where they would live and how to connect their respective planet alliances if they hook up. I looked at an Irish Pennant and pointed and said "Okay this is Crystal Tokyo". Then I laughed and said that wait a minute why does it have to be Crystal Tokyo? Crystal Tokyo is an ugly place to live with all of those shards of glass sticking out just ready to cut you. It's a safety hazard to live there so I changed it to the Moon Kingdom which actually looks beautiful.
In my next Sailor Moon moment of laughter I got an empty bottle and used it as a mic as I pretended to be on a Sailor Moon panel answering questions and trying to walk out the fact that Haruka isn't the moon princess. I think I actually got pretty far. My stance was I'm identifying as Darien I have to protect Serena too and she's nuts over me and THAT'S the Messiah or at least one of them.
Then I laughed because I was looking at a site that says "You know you watch too much Sailor Moon when" and one of the points was that you watch too much when you start calling your friends by Sailor Moon characters names whether they like it or not. I'm guilty as charged.
"I hate Sailor Saturn because she's stupid!" That makes me laugh all the time along when someone else listed almost the entire characters of Sailor Moon except for Uranus and Neptune as to who they hated on the show and someone replied "You just listed the entire cast of Sailor Moon except for Uranus and Neptune. Why do you even watch the show?" LOL
Calling myself a lunatic after all of this has made me laugh. Me: "Malachite you're a lunatic!" Me: "I know right?" Me: "YOU NEED HELP!" Me: *laughs* "I know right?"
I seriously love the convos I have with myself.
My logic is like this donkey while debating Sailor Moon and this makes me laugh too because it's SOOOOOO me. http://youtu.be/Cg_8knBHEyw (http://youtu.be/Cg_8knBHEyw)
I dressed in a white blouse and black slacks for work today. So did the other Connie in the office.
There's a character in Baccano! named Jacuzzi Splot.
the panda camera from SD zoo! the panda was sleeping on his face for a while
Sailor Moon Promise of the Rose Abridged "seed" talk
My Iguana loves watermelon, so I'll slice some up to add to her food :) Trouble is she tends to gulp her food much like a large dog does and gives herself a brain freeze from eating the cold melon too quickly :laugh:
Imagining an iguana with brain freeze.
A scene in the fanfic "Absence" where Luna tells Rei that she objects to her and Usagi going on a date and then Rei says "Well thankfully no one cares." LOL!
Jamie's picture-laden distress over on the Bad Jokes thread >:-)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FVs0HF.jpg&hash=d97d34651f555b1698c69d4eda34173bb91ace19)
Me: "I've been weird these last few weeks with less hours at work. I want to pick up piano again, revist my japanese lessons, and fine tune my french."
Mum: "That's not weird. What i consider weird is you buying a packer online and me being okay with it"
LOL, yay for progress thats no longer being ackward (and yay for random laughter :D )
My daughter has a two foot rubber alligator toy, and today she tied it to a five foot rope and dragged it around on our errands downtown. She kept reassuring people (with a straight face) that the animal wasn't real. :laugh:
Quote from: Felix on August 17, 2012, 11:48:07 PM
My daughter has a two foot rubber alligator toy, and today she tied it to a five foot rope and dragged it around on our errands downtown. She kept reassuring people (with a straight face) that the animal wasn't real. :laugh:
That's so cute!
-Maddie
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.cleanfunnypics.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2012%2F07%2F375596_10151006424717870_1497202319_n.jpg&hash=9187b4dd2b5d02b662eb698dc72a54d2433d9e44)
Joan Rivers!
Quote from: MadelineB on August 18, 2012, 01:16:09 AM
That's so cute!
-Maddie
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.cleanfunnypics.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2012%2F07%2F375596_10151006424717870_1497202319_n.jpg&hash=9187b4dd2b5d02b662eb698dc72a54d2433d9e44)
Lol that pic is perfect. :D
Mother: "I should just grow a set and stop complaining about work"
Me: "You know you can just order one online"
(my apologizes if that offends any of you but it was rather amusing to us two...and i think i'm still just so relieved by her reaction)
I still laugh at the "Why so Sirius" meme.
Hitting my hand on the wall hard in class tonight then laughing cause I did something stupid and now its really sore and swollen, no point crying when I did a stupid thing...
Oh, the hilarity of the haircuts.
Ace Of Wands - ITV 1970's spooky kid's show 'Peacock Pie: Episode 1' (6 September 1972) (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BqeFp-ChxTs#)
i tells pi to be rational. Pi tells i to get real. Hahahahahahahahahahahaha.
One of my friends told me a very funny joke. He's Chinese and he says his parents are the stereotypical Asian parents and would say, "You got hepatitis B? Why not hepatitis A+?"
These kinda dumb characters in Baccano!
Dallas Genoard, who almost everyone hates, trying to convince Luck Gandor to help him and his men get retaliation against Firo Prochainezo for beating them up. Luck and Firo are good friends. Good luck with that, Dallas.
There's also this gem from the first episode: "The Gandors are just small time, boss. It won't take much trouble to wipe 'em out." The Gandor brothers are immortal.
Oh yeah and it took Isaac and Miria seventy years to figure out that they were immortal.
I was reading up on the amazing lush and sexy film of Romeo & Juliet that Franco Zeffirelli made in the 60's (I really recommend it - DiCaprio, Danes? Pff...) when I came across this item of trivia, which made me nearly wet myself laughing:
"According to Franco Zeffirelli's autobiography, Paul McCartney was originally asked to play the part of Romeo."
I'm still laughing.
The term 'fart-sack', just has a humorous ring to it :laugh: But then it was also somewhat triggering because it reminded me of early school years for some reason :P
Quote from: Padma on August 24, 2012, 05:29:32 AM
I was reading up on the amazing lush and sexy film of Romeo & Juliet that Franco Zeffirelli made in the 60's (I really recommend it - DiCaprio, Danes? Pff...) when I came across this item of trivia, which made me nearly wet myself laughing:
"According to Franco Zeffirelli's autobiography, Paul McCartney was originally asked to play the part of Romeo."
I'm still laughing.
The cute Beatle
My neighbor's toy chihuahua thought it was going to chase my other neighbors Manx cat :laugh: Lucky for for the chihuahua it can run away pretty fast :laugh:
Well, both laugh and cringe. I just started reading a Young Adult novel about a US teen ice skater, and it describes him as skating to "Bizet's opera Carmina Burana". Ferchrissakes. They so need me as copy-editor :).
Quote from: Jaime on August 30, 2012, 04:08:29 PM
I stop in at the store and the girl working my shift called me a butthole, lol.
Then she told me the telechek machine(it uses thermal paper) was out of ink, lol.
That doesn't sound like a very 'customer friendly' employee :) Does she know you work there?
Quote from: V M on August 12, 2012, 06:00:54 PM
My Iguana loves watermelon, so I'll slice some up to add to her food :) Trouble is she tends to gulp her food much like a large dog does and gives herself a brain freeze from eating the cold melon too quickly :laugh:
Ooh I used to have an iguana named Paco. He ate the same way, and it was pretty ridiculous. I fed him mostly kale.
So what made me laugh today and yesterday is something that happened the day before. It's something I probably shouldn't laugh at. I was downtown and there was a young guy with a pitbull, and there was a blind lady with a cane. She was running the cane back and forth in front of her as blind people do, and the dog got very interested in the ball at the tip. He starts taking that silly stance dogs do when they want to play and then he pounces. OMG. She didn't fall down or anything, just said something curt to the owner. He halfheartedly apologized. I was the only one laughing, but it was one of the funniest things I've seen in a long time.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Faffectionpraise.com%2Fdogstrain%2FDog_Language_files%2Fplay-bow1.jpg&hash=c993c8274690436d160a042ff248c12f60ca1f14)
Quote from: Bailey on September 01, 2012, 11:11:32 PM
It wasn't today, I profess, but it was yesterday. I had my orchiectomy.
Oh golly. Congratulations Bailey!
Quote from: Bailey on September 01, 2012, 11:11:32 PM
It wasn't today, I profess, but it was yesterday. I had my orchiectomy.
Congratulations Bailey! That's so cool. No more andro-blockers for you! :)
My boyfriend likened me and my mannerisms to the Jenny Schecter character from The L Word. I just laughed since he hasn't watched the series long enough to know how much that's an insult :P
Quote from: edderkopp on September 08, 2012, 11:26:55 PM
Haha. I adore Jenny. I have to say I liked her better earlier on as well, before she went batcrap crazy, but even at her craziest I kind of liked her. She has such a unique outlook on the world.
omg, someone else who actually likes her! Most of my friends who watched the show just thought she was a mega-bitch, but she actually had depth to her character. I guess I do have that self-indulgent living in your own head thing going on as well the constant lip-biting.
How twee.
Quote from: edderkopp on September 09, 2012, 12:16:00 AM
I just love how openly flawed she was. I almost feel like they did her a bit of a disservice, because they could have done SO much with her character. She was so complex and then they just simplified her. Mia Kirshner did an absolutely fabulous job, she really did, both earlier on and near the end.
I'm trying to remember exactly how she went insane. It was a slow progression. I want to watch the whole series again. ;D
Marina and her suicide attempt.
Being filmed and exploited by her new roommate guy triggered her suppressed memory and the "Carnival" sequence in season 2 is a parallel to her sexual abuse as a child.
Then the whole cutting herself up to shreds bit...
what really made her so crazy was the publishing of her memoir, I think. She was told that she sort of had to stop being the victim, and she did, but she instead became a manipulator and abuser herself. Her biggest douchey act was cheating on Max at the end of season 3 and washing her hands of him. That's when everyone just wanted to strangle her from then onward.
What I really liked though was the "chart" storyline in season 3. My friends and I did something along the same lines and it's weird to see that you've sort of slept with most of your friends in 5 degrees of seperation or less O.o
I fancied Jenny - but I'd still love to have one of those teeshirts that said:
I killed Jenny Schechter
And I had help
;D
Meanwhile, on-topic :) - I woke up giggling this morning out of a dream that ended with someone flinging a huge amount of warm rice pudding onto my back.
Paging Dr Freud...
Check me out, I'm becoming a goose!
Well, according to OSX anyway, which helpfully corrected my email to an old friend today, telling her that I'm going through a gander transition ::). ;D
Quote from: Padma on September 09, 2012, 05:36:41 AM
Check me out, I'm becoming a goose!
Well, according to OSX anyway, which helpfully corrected my email to an old friend today, telling her that I'm going through a gander transition ::). ;D
Thanks, I needed that.
BTW, one of my wife's nicknames (not the nickname of one of my wives, I'm areligious) is Snowgoose; I used to be Snow-gander. Heehee. So I am very familiar with gander transitioning.
Goose luck!
Well, I used to be called Spoonbill :).
Quote from: Padma on September 09, 2012, 10:55:46 AM
Well, I used to be called Spoonbill :).
Those are beautiful birds:
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.aaagiclee.com%2Fgalleria%2Fimages%2FCC0006spoonbillP1014.jpg&hash=1f48c4f64723a6a135c4817d30d17b46719b2c8e)
but I would rather be a Sporkbill. More versatile. :)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Farnoldzwicky.s3.amazonaws.com%2FBizarroSpork.gif&hash=544655bc8ef563ce5a7d4a56b2745663459d738c)
Spoonbills make great grunting sounds - but for the hands-down best ever description of a bird call, look no further than this (the female doesn't get much of a look in here, mind you):
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.yoxi.net%2Fanitya%2Fcapercaillie.jpg&hash=335f04f089881781a9cff5a3de3781417ce996e8)
I like to think that the female is rolling her eyes as she goes Guck-Guck and puts up with his nonsense...
I was trying to set up a date for later this week thinking lunch or a hike or something. Instead, she invited me to the queer sex ed and BDSM talks that she's going to. I'm really excited about this, but it cracked me up.
Adventure Time. That always makes me laugh. <3 Jake. He's so adorkable.
My 12 year old lost a tooth yesterday and the tooth fairy gave her $1.50. Today she in a hushed and reverent voice told me that the tooth fairy gave her a special quarter that's small like a nickel but it has ridges so it must be a quarter. I'm pretty sure it was a dime. I didn't correct her because I've given up trying to explain money to her, and because I don't think I could have done it respectfully and without giggling. We have very silly problems sometimes.
Quote from: Padma on September 09, 2012, 12:32:07 PM
Spoonbills make great grunting sounds - but for the hands-down best ever description of a bird call, look no further than this (the female doesn't get much of a look in here, mind you):
Lol omg Padma this is awesome. :laugh:
Yeah, I like to imagine the author spent years perfecting the transcription :).
Quote from: Padma on September 12, 2012, 02:26:34 AM
Yeah, I like to imagine the author spent years perfecting the transcription :).
He did. He was married during that time. Ba-bum-bum!
Quote from: MadelineB on September 12, 2012, 03:11:57 AM
He did. He was married during that time. Ba-bum-bum!
Meh, I assumed the author was a woman :).
Today was radiant, and everything just felt good ^.^ I have had this smile I can't get rid of. Nor do I want to!
I came to my usual spot near the hospital to get wifi, and there's thumping base and a freakin bouncy castle in the parking lot. I'm not sure why I find this funny, but it feels very surreal. :laugh:
I'm such a geek! I was queuing to get my train ticket from the machine, overheard people in front of me failing to find Exeter St James' Park in the machine's index - when it got to my turn, I spent an extra minute determining that you had to enter S T [space] J to find it - just couldn't leave it unsolved ::).
And no, there wasn't anyone queuing behind me - I have some standards... :)
I told my van insurance company I'm now female on my driver's licence - and they refunded me £12.60 :).
I know it's probably something really prosaic like "women statistically make less claims", but I like to imagine they have a flag on their system for trans folk which assumes our new-found peace of mind makes us better drivers... :D
Life.
It was yesterday, but the facilities guy came over the the support department looking for burly guys to help him move something ... and he passed me be entirely.
It's good to be considered one of the girls instead of one of the guys.
The story about Rahm Emmanuel being accused of liking Nickelback by the striking Chicago teachers. His office released a statement just to say no he doesn't. :laugh:
The report that came back with my CT scan
Also one of the ER nurses this morning
The Three Stooges dvd i'm watching. Three Missing Links episode the part where Moe slaps Curly's hand and it rotates to bonk him on the head. Then Moe gets upset and starts chasing him with an empty bucket and throws it through glass missing Curly's head.
Game Grumps with Jontron and Egoraptor. I seriously can't stop laughing at this, because it reminds me of how me and my brother play games.
I made a new trans woman friend online, she's a French speaker (her English is fine too) and I'm cracking myself (and her) up trying to type in French on my phone when I'm bloody tired and keep forgetting words (and there is no French word for Gender that's different from Sex) :).
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi302.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fnn90%2Fjoseph_jealousy%2F2ED770B8-E09B-484D-AB8D-9BBD8D7B55C8-4560-000003DF1CC92709_zpsb9b1200a.jpg&hash=bb7d30f84b781c265321e84958d977b56be4ef1b)
I literally spat out my drink and choked at his own comment.
Quote from: Padma on September 21, 2012, 07:25:04 PM
I made a new trans woman friend online, she's a French speaker (her English is fine too) and I'm cracking myself (and her) up trying to type in French on my phone when I'm bloody tired and keep forgetting words (and there is no French word for Gender that's different from Sex) :).
Le Gender! ;)
Quote from: Padma on September 22, 2012, 03:23:36 AM
Le Gender is sadly legendary :).
Man dieu! It was worth le try. :(
Quote from: MadelineB on September 22, 2012, 03:41:55 AM
Man dieu! It was worth le try. :(
Dude or dude not - there is no le try.
[Disclaimer: Yoda would not have been binary-obsessed...]
Oh, and I'm in such a teen strop today, and then found this on youtube, made my day ;D.
Moving Pictures - What About Me (1982) (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OzQKECQgjW8#)
Quote from: Padma on September 22, 2012, 03:51:42 AM
Dude or dude not - there is no le try.
[Disclaimer: Yoda would not have been binary-obsessed...]
Yes, Yoda was always the most non-binary sibling among the famous Yo triplets: Yoda, Yoplait, and Yodude!
Don't forget Yomama :).
When I was a kid I loved punky brewster. My roommate showed me this video and I about choked.
http://www.grantland.com/blog/hollywood-prospectus/post/_/id/58082/rembert-explains-punky-brewster-and-hard-drugs (http://www.grantland.com/blog/hollywood-prospectus/post/_/id/58082/rembert-explains-punky-brewster-and-hard-drugs)
This:
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FOJRRV.jpg&hash=d6afb98c799ff1282eb35bedc8ce7de3a1a79dfc)
At the pharmacy today, someone said "Stacey is coming in this afternoon" and then clarified it with "It's guy Stacey today." I thought we must have a bigender or trans customer or something and asked if he preferred a different name. I got some funny looks and found out that we have two part-time pharmacists named Stacey, one of which is a guy.
I just remembered something hilarious that I'd forgotten for decades. Blue Peter (for non-Brits, that's a recently demised squeaky-clean children's tv programme) held a children's story-writing competition when I was 14 (in the 70s), and I sent in a Robert Sheckley homage about heaven and hell, that had gay sex in it.
I didn't win.
The way my dog always looks at the coffee table when I lower it back to its normal position after eating my dinner. I think it scares him.
Quote from: Padma on October 03, 2012, 06:50:31 PM
I just remembered something hilarious that I'd forgotten for decades. Blue Peter (for non-Brits, that's a recently demised squeaky-clean children's tv programme) held a children's story-writing competition when I was 14 (in the 70s), and I sent in a Robert Sheckley homage about heaven and hell, that had gay sex in it.
I didn't win.
Geex,
I used to watch that too many years to think about ago. Recently demised? It must have been going for over 50 yrs!
Quote from: Cindy James on October 04, 2012, 02:57:13 AM
Recently demised? It must have been going for over 50 yrs!
My mistake, it's still going, just not on BBC1 any more.
I just watched one of Michael Palin Ripping Yarns series. The one on Escape from Stalag Luft 234B. I was on the floor laughing so much!
Quote from: judithlynn on October 04, 2012, 03:53:59 AM
I just watched one of Michael Palin Ripping Yarns series. The one on Escape from Stalag Luft 234B. I was on the floor laughing so much!
I loved the Black Pudding one :).
Oh Yes Ostlethwaite and his rain guage!!. Padma I can see we are two people of the same interests. Must be that we are both from Devon.
Hugs
I have been having trouble sleeping lately, so saw the Dr today and amongst other things got a prescription for a sleeping pill.
There is a warning label on the side, "Warning: this medication may cause drowsiness."
Quote from: judithlynn on October 04, 2012, 05:09:47 AM
Oh Yes Ostlethwaite and his rain guage!!. Padma I can see we are two people of the same interests. Must be that we are both from Devon.
Hugs
Even the white bits were black :).
I'm originally from London, but very happy to have landed in Devon.
City employees make me laugh today, I mean how do you send someone a letter of acceptance and then tell them you received nothing originally after they cancel you.
I mean what do I pay them for out of my paycheck.
Padma;
Me too. My parents lived in Devon, but I lived in West London then Buckinghamshire. Did you get moved by one of the Government relocations to the Exter Business Park?
Nah, I've been all over :).
I heard about the blue and green honey problem in France. Seemingly the bees were targeting left over MM colourings outside an Mars Factory and the colouring became embedded in the honey they made.
I'm drunk, there's a young hetero cisguy asleep on my couch, and I have no idea what to do about it. He's just a friend and I don't know him all that well and he doesn't know I'm trans. I think he realizes I'm gay but I'm not positive on that. My cat likes him. I just had a great conversation about politics with the nice girl who lives next door to the east. Lol I don't get respite childcare often enough; I have no idea what I'm doing. ;D
Quote from: Felix on October 06, 2012, 01:39:27 AM
I'm drunk, there's a young hetero cisguy asleep on my couch, and I have no idea what to do about it. He's just a friend and I don't know him all that well and he doesn't know I'm trans. I think he realizes I'm gay but I'm not positive on that. My cat likes him. I just had a great conversation about politics with the nice girl who lives next door to the east. Lol I don't get respite childcare often enough; I have no idea what I'm doing. ;D
You're a great guy to talk with Felix so I'm not surprised at all.
Seeing a pair of rabbits hopping about in the roadside bushes on the ride down the hill to Uni Library this morning. Not often they are out in daylight this time of year.
So, my girlfriend was playing with these bouncy balls we'd gotten from a vending machine type something, making them bounce from floor to ceiling to floor. She'd lose control of them every so often and they'd bounce all over the place, causing her to go running into the hallway or scurrying under the bed to retrieve them. I'm not one for laughing at other people's misfortunes, but this show of hers had me in stitches on the bed for some reason.
"The FDA has been looking for a generic name for Viagra. After careful
consideration by a team of government experts, it recently announced
that it has settled on the generic name of Mycoxafloppin.
Also considered were Mycoxafailin, Mydixadrupin, Mydixarizin, Dixafix, and
of course, Ibepokin."
The maximum ridiculosity inherent in Mario Party 7.
Me + friends + MP7 + cookies = Hilarity :icon_weee:
Ok. I know I'm a dork. This has been well established.
This parody has had me giggling on and off for three days.
||Why Was There Bacon In The Soap?!|| Random Rumbelle (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=foIwmkqRCyo#)
Three months of continuous sunshine. For a Portlander, that sounds like heaven. But I'm relieved that I only have to wait 36 hours before the rains finally come and Portland is Portland again.
Crazy long stretch of perfect weather: we hardly knew ya. Thanks for visiting. Come again some time. My skin thanks you. I forget what mold smells like. The grass is brown. Should I water it? Nah.
Normal soggy autumn and winter returning: hugs. So glad you are coming back! See you Friday. 3 inches in 3 days sounds nice.
My neighbors gran daughter :) Such a cute lil' bug... We sang a couple of songs and she told me all kinds of amazing stuff that only a three year old could come up with :laugh:
Stuff, far too suacy for this forum ;D
*Saucy, and far too crazy for proper spelling.
I just got a spam email whose subject was:
<my old first name>, what sort of man are you?
I laughed so loud, next door's dog started barking. Boy, did they miss the boat. (Online blokey clothes shop, in case you're wondering. It went on to ask whether I'm: The Guv'nor, The Pro, The Champ, or The Player? ::) )
If only it were a real person sending that so you could reply all snarky like.
I could totally be The Governess ;D.
This. Which is, in fact, absolutely true. This.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.yoxi.net%2Fanitya%2Fvanilla.gif&hash=3045dec24a4c5e0e4fceab854b79820676cd0f50)
Quote from: Padma on October 19, 2012, 04:59:08 PM
This. Which is, in fact, absolutely true. This.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.yoxi.net%2Fanitya%2Fvanilla.gif&hash=3045dec24a4c5e0e4fceab854b79820676cd0f50)
Those vanilla seed pods have got the sexy thing going on. You can see why it means "little vag":
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2F1.bp.blogspot.com%2F-qZSUfSwznas%2FUHKjFc59Q8I%2FAAAAAAAAAZM%2FLPGmcQJZBWA%2Fs1600%2FVanilla%2Bplant.gif&hash=ab87da9a295d6bc1df18ca765c90d94e4b08ff0a)
to that I say, "You grow, girl!"
Quote from: Padma on October 18, 2012, 11:58:24 AM
I just got a spam email whose subject was:
<my old first name>, what sort of man are you?
I laughed so loud, next door's dog started barking. Boy, did they miss the boat. (Online blokey clothes shop, in case you're wondering. It went on to ask whether I'm: The Guv'nor, The Pro, The Champ, or The Player? ::) )
I was at work and got a spam email from a 'Russian princess with smoky eyes' she was after a man.'
I read it aloud to my colleagues and got a reply from one of the girls. 'You'd better forward it to Art, he's the only man in the lab'
A neighbor of mine (also of Scandinavian heritage) jokingly asked:
"Is it cold out, or is it just snowing?"
Does it get cold when it snows? I keep seeing people ski-ing wearing sunglasses :o
I was chatting with my hairdresser while she cut my hair today, and she's always curious about how my transition is going. At one point, I said "All I need now is a higher voice, and to lose six inches in height..." and she replied (she's quite short, by the way) "If you could give me six inches, I'd be happy." I managed to keep a straight face - it was an effort ;D.
This Boston Terrier...
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fstatic.grindtv.com%2Fimages%2F1%2F00%2F40%2F68%2F91%2F406891.jpg&hash=98f335e9182344434a4b6c157e460eddd4d76f62)
Who couldn't love this lil' character?
Seeing that purple in the pumpkin loot bag and then realizing it wasn't the headless horseman's horse but his sword :P I can still use it :)
The Job Centre phone woman kept on calling me "sir", even after I asked her not to. After a while, it was just funny ::).
This was actually last Saturday :)
One of my neighbors had a couple of her grand daughters come to visit, as the girls were walking (which somehow tends to look like some kind of Vaudeville show) through the lobby, the elder of the two let rip quite a loud stinker
The little girl already looked a bit embarrassed so we were all trying to not say anything, but of coarse their mother who was dropping them off had to scold her "child's name, what do you say after doing that?"
The kid pipes up and starts singing and dancing about... "I farted, I farted, now everyone looks retarded"
We all started busting up :D Free entertainment while waiting on the mail carrier
Quote from: V M on October 30, 2012, 07:14:42 AM
"I farted, I farted, now everyone looks retarded"
...
Oh right, that rhymes in America ;D.
Quote from: Padma on October 30, 2012, 07:44:40 AM
...
Oh right, that rhymes in America ;D.
Not really. But in America, not really is good enough for at least one party every four years.
But seriously, I'm going to try on the French Maid costume my sister sent me. If it fits, I may wear it again tomorrow night.
That will make me:
RE-TARTED.
I will avoid legumes and cruciferous vegetables just as a sound precaution.
What made me laugh today was hearing that recording of the toddler crying and saying she's tired of Mitt Romney and Barack Obama. That kid is a hero. ;D
Watching the Fanfic critic's videos
My son had a bit of a bad attitude on the way to the bus this morning. I suggested to him that he should find someone with a good attitude and trade with them. Then, I suggested one of his friends who is a ten year old girl (my son is 6). He said "she does have a good attitude now but, it can turn really bad really fast. It kind of scares me". I thought it was so funny! ;D
Lauren Weedman on the radio. I'm not sure if she's a showman or an author or a regular stand up comic, but she made me lol. Also, chimpanzees. I've been reading a Jane Goodall book, and chimps are good at being adorable and ridiculous.
Realizing what it sounds like when I rock back and forth in my computer chair :icon_redface:
I ran into a friend from university whom I haven't seen since she graduated. Much laughter was had.
seeing the dog wake himself up snoring while his head is tucked up into my armpit.
Watching my little sister get really excited over her Neopets games. She's 17.
My dog thinking he was going to do his usual sideways jump to the top of the couch and him just whacking the cushion because he didn't jump high enough and rolling off it.
Dear oh dear oh dear - the BBC need a better copy-editor for the Radio Times. Someone reviewing the new Hobbit film has described Gollum as a "hobbit-cum-junkie" - yes, I see what they're trying to say, but now all I can think is "What *has* it got in its pocketses?"
Me. On Monday, I had near zero gender dysphoria. I just felt completely like me and forgot that there was anything about myself that wasn't the way I already feel inside.
Peed on myself twice on the sitdown at work, because I forgot, TWICE, that my anatomy still needs a directing hand to stay in the piddle pot. LOL.
Someone posted some autocorrect gems, I was reading them and got stuck laughing uncontrollably, nearly popped something. It was "wawa skittletits" that did it. Well, it is 3 am...
This actually makes me laugh all season, my iguana likes to watch football games
Quote from: Liam Erik on November 17, 2012, 12:36:04 PM
I found some things from when I was very very little, including one of those books that asks you all sorts of questions about yourself and you fill in the answers, and it's called '(your name here)'s Book' or something.
Apparently, when I grew up, I was certain I would have sheep, cows, horses, goats, pigs, llamas, alpacas, rabbits, dogs and cats.
Apparently, I also wished my parents had named me Oliver.
This is actually really cool.
Quote from: Cain on December 04, 2012, 12:18:22 PM
Watching my little sister get really excited over her Neopets games. She's 17.
I have neopets, got them a year after introducing my daughter to the game when she was 7. I still log in occasionally and lodge them or use the lab ray or whatever.
What made me laugh today was bad things. I don't know if it's gallows humor as a coping mechanism or if that's just the way I am. My daughter's school room had to be evacuated because she was flipping out because she wanted to play with blocks. On Friday it was the same thing because she'd snuck in some lip gloss and they tried to make her put it away.
Half the stuff she tells me is innocent and adorable and the other half sounds innocent but also like serial killer talk. Somebody pointed out she should be a "threatener for the mafia" after she very straight-facedly described a nice young german shepherd and how he has short fur for his breed and he's almost a year old and she would never poke him with an umbrella because he wouldn't like that. Wait what?
Lol now I don't trust her with umbrellas.
She has such an odd mixture of ralphie ("when I grow up I want to be a principal or a caterpillar") and hannibal that it's hard not to laugh being around her all the time.
I just noticed my child support paperwork looks a lot like the result of a gay marriage. Yay. ;D
That damn music thread you add, "in my pants" to. Nearly wet mine with some of the titles I thought of.
It's the zaniest thread I've seen yet.
Huggs
Catherine
My young daughter a few months post potty training had an "accident" today.
Upon discovering this she turned to me and said, "Accidents happen, Daddy!"
I reassured her that they surely did then shared a giggle with my wife. Our daughter is the best accident that ever happened to us! (and living proof that 99% is not 100% :))
An old episode of who's line, Ryan and Colin never fail to bring a smile to my face :)
My neighbor's yippy little dogs reaction to me making snarly noises at it :) First it looked confused, but then it got all happy when I laughed and ran about like it was the best 'good one' it had heard in quite awhile :laugh:
Quote from: V M on January 18, 2013, 09:32:26 PM
My neighbor's yippy little dogs reaction to me making snarly noises at it :) First it looked confused, but then it got all happy when I laughed and ran about like it was the best 'good one' it had heard in quite awhile :laugh:
Lol :)
The boss and I went down the street for shwarmas.
Him: How are you feeling?
Me: Good.
Him: About the treatments and changes?
Me: Oh, that. I thought you meant life in general. Haha, that's going well too.
Him: How does that work? Like a pen? At the doctor's?
Me: No, with a needle every two weeks by myself. Here *pointing*.
Him: YOU STAB YOURSELF IN THE REAR END?! DUDE...
I don't know, I just couldn't stop laughing.
I fell asleep on the couch, and when I woke up, my hair looked like Bozo the Clown's - just not orange.
Quote from: Pleasingly Plump Jamie D on January 19, 2013, 12:58:27 AM
I fell asleep on the couch, and when I woke up, my hair looked like Bozo the Clown's - just not orange.
Somehow not surprised
Quote from: Pleasingly Plump Jamie D on January 19, 2013, 12:58:27 AM
I fell asleep on the couch, and when I woke up, my hair looked like Bozo the Clown's - just not orange.
I look a lot like the bride of frankenstein when I get up.
LOL... One of my neighbors has a little snick dog and is dog sitting another of the same type (some kind of something doodle mutts)
Anyway, they both went after another neighbor's orange stripe cat who just sat there and boxed both of them up until they ran away yelping :laugh:
Orange stripe cat - 2 -VS- Yippy lil' dogs - 0
The Fanfic Critic lol.
since starting estrogen I have been laughing/giggling for no reason whatsoever. So I don't know what made me laugh today but I did laugh a lot. :icon_joy:
my kid is so much like this guy :laugh:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yAOhBBEQwE8 (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yAOhBBEQwE8)
Quote from: Felix on February 02, 2013, 03:26:49 AM
my kid is so much like this guy :laugh:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yAOhBBEQwE8 (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yAOhBBEQwE8)
OMG... Reminds me of one of my neighbors, but he's in his mid 30's
Quote from: Felix on February 02, 2013, 03:26:49 AM
my kid is so much like this guy :laugh:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yAOhBBEQwE8 (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yAOhBBEQwE8)
omg, that video is spot on. Whoever wrote it and acted in it had to have had family on the spectrum. The train is ok. :laugh:
"Can we go on the train now and drive it?" XD
Someone elsewhere posted a picture of a character from The Lord of the Rings and a direct quote from The Lord of the Rings, claimed it "wasn't related to" The Lord of the Rings, and claimed to be astounded that people made that connection. Yup.
Dead Space 3 commentary
No matter how much I never click on it, youtube keeps recommending for me a video titled "Getting High Injecting Snake Venom." Who the hell does the internet think I am? :laugh:
Quote from: Caleb. on February 28, 2013, 09:16:25 PM
Keaira and I were having a very intelligent discussion and watching very intelligent commentaries such as this one:
The Jumbo Hippopotamus Fart [HD] (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SeCOfNWjJUs#)
Oh my god, I think I busted my funny bone. XDDDDD
I think many FTMs can relate to this...
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi7.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fy285%2FBukefalos%2Fami%2F8853_zps0f945787.jpg&hash=76d6f1042d49695a887be17c550235554d650cdb)
Quote from: Caleb. on March 05, 2013, 03:47:11 AM
Keaira and I watched Jeepers Creepers, which really creeps me out...she thought it was dumb. But anyway, right as I'm about to go to bed, she goes "
Me: Goodnight. Sleep tight. Don't let the bed bugs bite.
Keaira: Don't let the Creeper bite.
Me: Why would you say that??? I had forgotten about it!
Keaira: Don't worry about it, you'll be able to beat him off
And now she's picturing it and laughing like a lunatic. -_-
I still giggle about it. lol ^_^
A woman who works at the nursing home was staring at my chest. She said "Your already bigger than me." A few minutes later I caught her staring again. I threw my hands up to cover myself and told her to please stop staring at me. I said it with a big grin on my face, we both had a great laugh over it.
This little girl!
Xylophone player gets serious (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=agDpd5hTSkQ&feature=youtube_gdata_player#)
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on March 05, 2013, 08:59:28 PM
This little girl!
Xylophone player gets serious (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=agDpd5hTSkQ&feature=youtube_gdata_player#)
That was awesome. That made me laugh just now.
I got to laugh a lot earlier while singing. We are learning a french piece and I made a comment that in order to learn the french you must get cocky and arrogant. You must make faces and watching everyone start to make faces was absolutely awesome.
The bad humor from the indie game Binding of Issac >:-).
Quote from: Bailey on March 07, 2013, 11:04:29 PM
I saw someone use the nonword "perchololate" in lieu of "percolate."
I shall add that word to the book of WTH words.
Some dads are a little different. :D
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2F25.media.tumblr.com%2Ftumblr_lz30w7BoKt1rn4985o1_500.gif&hash=9a067bb781c4c149aca8887d4acb645206bac9f4)
I forgot about this and it made me laugh my butt off just now when I listened to the message. I got a blood test done a couple days ago and I have the testosterone level of a small child. I wonder if that's a good thing or not. Mind you I am not on HRT so there is nothing suppressing it.
Darth Vader in a kilt on a unicycle playing b->-bleeped-<-ipes.
Darth Vader In A Kilt On A Unicycle Playing B->-bleeped-<-ipes (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wTniWCh0nwo#)
Grossing my sister out
There's a young guy who comes and cleans/vacuums the public areas at my apt.s :) He always wears earphones and hums along with whatever he's listening to
I don't know what he's listening to but his humming always sounds like an odd rendition of the Oompa Loompa song :laugh:
He's also rather shy and gets all flustered when I talk to him :laugh:
Keaira is eating chips flavoured with cock sauce. She says it's not that bad. Good to know?
Within the United States, Sriracha sauce is most commonly associated with the version produced by Huy Fong Foods, colloquially known as "rooster sauce"[1] or "cock sauce".
Quote from: Caleb. on March 16, 2013, 03:07:03 AM
Keaira is eating chips flavoured with cock sauce. She says it's not that bad. Good to know?
Within the United States, Sriracha sauce is most commonly associated with the version produced by Huy Fong Foods, colloquially known as "rooster sauce"[1] or "cock sauce".
I know I might get some bad rep, but..... I liked those cock sauce flavored chips. It was a free bag of a flavor that Walkers is trying out. spicy but sweet. ^_^
Caleb's reaction to seeing Fergie half-naked in the "I got a feelin'" music video by the Black Eyed Peas. Extremely amusing.
Quote from: Keaira on March 16, 2013, 05:17:33 AM
I know I might get some bad rep, but..... I liked those cock sauce flavored chips. It was a free bag of a flavor that Walkers is trying out. spicy but sweet. ^_^
I should also mention you took 6 inches of Subway earlier today, have 6 more inches waiting and ready, and that for dinner you enjoyed a chicken taco. :P
Second day of being a blonde.
Decided to upload a new forum profile avatar picture, using Tapatalk on my phone.
No matter how I rotated my photo before I uploaded it, Tapatalk (or Susans?) turned it so I was laying horizontally with the top of my head towards the right.
Coincidence?
I think not.
And I don't live at the equator.
The translation on this bag of connectors I was working with today:
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi1279.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fy537%2FDevlynMarie%2F20130404_133758_zps7f71ffcd.jpg&hash=7db1f56c727a6efb447ff97d2a41c3175c6681d5)
A chase between a dog and a cat.
That xylophone kid and also jimmy fallon late night tweets. I don't have a twitter and I've never actually watched the guy's show but I got linked that segment and binged on it on youtube and it made me happy. :)
This did.
Wile E Coyote kills the Road Runner (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vR7DCFCkqao#)
Religious reasons for why a page may not be found.
http://www.larknews.com/july15_2003/secondary.php?page=5 (http://www.larknews.com/july15_2003/secondary.php?page=5)
I'm not sure, but apparently a gal at the store punched her boyfriend for eyeing up my boobs ::)
I was watching a Youtube response video and these phrases made me laugh:
"I wrote a list of everything thing that I think is wrong with her."
"She hates herself and I don't blame her."
My nephew is picking up my bad habits. I spit on the ground and he spits on the porch. I told him to stop doing what I do and he says "but I love copying you". I asked him if I jumped off of a bridge would he do it and he said "no, but I'll copy everything else you do."
LOL he got me there
I found a video of David Tennant in a poncho and sombrero getting slapped by a fish.
Quote from: Edge on May 22, 2013, 11:44:34 PM
I found a video of David Tennant in a poncho and sombrero getting slapped by a fish.
I just read this outloud and now my SO is looking it up.
Quote from: Darkie on June 03, 2013, 10:46:20 PMI just read this outloud and now my SO is looking it up.
David Tennant gets slapped by a fish (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k0oFL1wMfcw#)
This makes me laugh just thinking about it. (And, yes, that show has nothing resembling historical accuracy, but not as bad as microwaves.)
Merlin - Children in need 2009 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vJhixrsFO1Y&feature=youtu.be#)
We're finally getting some warm weather here in England, so our house is pretty warm in the evenings which is making it difficult to sleep. I asked my youngest daughter whether she wanted me to open her bedroom window to let in a cool breeze - and she said "No, because I'm worried that Ninjas might break in through the window and attack me whilst I sleep!".
So I suggested just opening it a crack & putting it on the latch, to which she replied: "But what if they're really thin Ninjas? Thinjas! Thinjas are going to attack me whilst I sleep!"
Gotta love that kid. :D
One of my neighbors has two of her granddaughters ages 6 & 7 visiting, They came into the lobby while I was checking my mailbox and one says to the other "male name is a girl" and the other one replies "I already know that"
Cute lil' bugs :laugh: I was thinking, I'm right here, I can hear you... but decided to just smile and ask them how they're doing
They said that they were fine and then proceeded to go back to playing their 'I know more than you' game :laugh:
Remembering when I showed my friend a video of a maid cafe....she viewed it and said she looked at the comments and saw a bunch of desperate people....Two of those comments were mine LOL
MY WIFE!!!
Strip Search on Penny Arcade TV -- makes bad days better.
My neighbor and her sister making 'boyfriend dude' go sit on the bench because he kept trying to look down my top while I was working on my neighbor's bike :icon_evil_laugh: LOL... Typical guy
While I was playing the new Tomb Raider game I mentioned out loud that I like Lara Croft's boots, ad my friend went "you would be looking at her boots" since he and his roommate were looking at her boobs.
Some guy that came into the store said I was so sexy today. That's pretty laughable.
My funny vocal slip while playing "St.James Infirmary"
There's this one passage:
Then give me six crapshooting pallbearers
It came out like this:
Then give me sax cr"loud laugh" sax? cr-cr....crap-shooting pallbea-"laugh" (thinking i should restart)rers
Let...(forgot the lyrics for a moment lol) a hundred blackbirds(?) sing me a song (still wrong)
put a jazz"giggle" b"laughter"
"stops playing"
20 minutes later i restart and still crack up. Then i tried from the beginning, same problem, but with a different verse.
(https://fbcdn-sphotos-c-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-ash4/1012991_577903358929246_1194681977_n.png)
I just had a marvelous idea:
First i record myself hitting my table with a plastic bottle to a click track.
Then i record an "organ" guitar track with a nice melody or riff, then semi-acoustic clean playing,
then screaming double-tracked vocals and some nice synths.
Korean Elvis, do you want to rock?
Lock and Loll!
I found out that there is a joke about Rumpelstiltskin, Dr. Frankenstein, and the Mad Hatter from Once Upon a Time being in a magical boy band called Believe or Leave. I bet that's how they really broke Regina.
Seeing a little dog trying to run round in circles chasing it's tail
Quote from: big kim on June 30, 2013, 03:34:23 PM
Seeing a little dog trying to run round in circles chasing it's tail
LOL... That's something that always cracks me up as well :laugh:
A lot of things, first was my dad and friend comparing their welts from yesterday's paintball game, that was just funny. Then was me and a girl talking about how we should record what was really happening at the youth group, and post it on the church's website, forgot what was happening some how, but it was funny.
I don't know if this is one of those "you'd have to be there" incidents, but this totally made me laugh.
One of my roommates is Arabic (he came to America to learn English) and only speaks a little bit of English. He moved in recently so I haven't figured out how to pronounce--let alone spell--his name, so I'll just refer to him as "the Arabic dude." He was cooking chicken today, and here's how our conversation went:
Arabic dude: "You eat chicken?"
Me: "Chicken? No, I don't eat meat."
Arabic dude: "You eat chicken?"
Me: "Nah, I just don't eat meat."
Arabic dude: "No meat, but eat chicken?"
Me: "No, I don't eat any meat."
Arabic dude: "This chicken. This not meat. You eat chicken."
Me: "No, I don't eat meat: no chicken, no pork, no beef... no meat."
Arabic dude: "You don't eat chicken?"
[Short pause]
Arabic dude: (solemnly, as if he just heard someone died) "I'm sorry."
Me: "It's okay."
There's either oil or soot on my guitar strings. I was just touching the broken string with my fingers.
Watching freestyle battles that are making me die laughing.
I genuinely thought i had a problem with my gender. Hah.
I forgot that when you shave and the hair grows back.....try not to scratch in public. Watching a grown man on tv scratch like an ape on crack is hysterical
Jonesy (John Paul Jones) screwing up the bass pedal entry in STH in Vienna 1973.
I fell out of bed last night (what am I, 2 years old?!?). I haven't done that for so long that I can't actually remember the last time it happened.
So there I was sleeping peacefully when all of a sudden I hit the floor, waking myself (and Hubby). I lay there on the floor for a couple of seconds, utterly bewildered, whilst Hubby asked whether I was OK. I was just fine, so I put my left foot flat on the floor so that I could stand up & get back into bed... when my calf suddenly went into a MASSIVE, agonising cramp. It hurt so badly that I couldn't use my leg at all; Hubby had to drag me back upright so that I could stretch out the cramp.
After recovering from that little extravaganza, I had a good chuckle about how ridiculous it is for someone in their 40s to fall out of bed like a toddler. ;D
One of the originally suggested names for Hannah Montana was Alexis Texas. Just google that name.
I noticed that a small group of boys kept showing up on nearly every isle at the grocery store today and they kept giggling and whispering to each other ??? I figured that I'd been outed and they were making fun of me :(
I edged a bit closer and overheard them talking about wanting to 'crawl up my sn**ch' ? :o So then I told them... "I can hear you ya know, do your mommies know you talk like that?"
They looked shocked for a second and then ran off giggling like kids do
Naughty LIL' buggers!!!
My uncle got a little drunk and insisted on dancing with me. It was very funny. He'll have such a hangover tomorrow. We all laughing when we DID dance. This is so unlike both of us. We also cracked a lot of jokes about the cultural differences between where i live and where he lives.
I absolutely love that shirt!
What was i thinking drinking two bottles of Coke and then not sleeping until about 6 AM
I found the clip from the Pink Panther where Clousseau hassles the guy with the "minky" unaware a bank robbery is taking place.Peter Sellers was a genius I defy anyone to watch this and not laugh
Bläck Fööss - Drink doch eine met 1981 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Jm0muoTs6A#)
My brother: Whenever I see Psy, I think of a big Asian lesbian.
This. (http://25.media.tumblr.com/f113248c52fb45e0ab8ccaaa0bd9fac3/tumblr_mmyjtiVEzc1r8f37mo1_400.gif)
I'm dying.
I tried to research whether wearing large plugs in the ears is something typical in lesbian culture, to test a theory I'm developing based on a thread over on the FTM board. (I was wondering whether wearing plugs/tunnels in the ears is 'a thing' in the more butch end of the lesbian community, which *might* explain why some FtMs who previously identified as lesbian have them).
So I typed 'lesbian culture ear plugs' into Google - nothing particularly relevant came up.
Then I tried narrowing it down to 'lesbian ear plugs' and got a lot of hits for earring sales - again, not really what I was looking for.
Then I tried 'lesbian plugs' and OMG WTF!!! That's definitely an NSFW search term. My eyes quite literally did this: o.O
Moral of the story? Be careful what you type into Google!
Quote from: FTMDiaries on July 10, 2013, 10:30:00 AM
Then I tried 'lesbian plugs' and OMG WTF!!! That's definitely an NSFW search term. My eyes quite literally did this: o.O
Moral of the story? Be careful what you type into Google!
I can so imagine what appeared on the screen. XD
I once made a similar mistake in my teen years and searched pictures with Finnish swears. Of course, I used the Finnish equivalent of the f-bomb - which is actually closer to the c-word - and bam. I had a screen full of women's privates and I was mentally scarred for some period of time.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi42.tinypic.com%2F2i6nbj5.jpg&hash=17f8a6db02371183426c5204bf43d0925a031d26)
That awkward moment when I got an eyelash in my eye whilst stuck in traffic and I knew I should look at it in the rear-view mirror & get it out... but I suddenly realised that checking out your face in the rear-view mirror is a stereotypically girly thing to do so I simply didn't bother.
Attempting to recite this:
The Muffin Man is seated at the table
In the laboratory of the Utility Muffin Research Kitchen . . .
Reaching for an oversized chrome spoon
He gathers an intimate quantity of dried muffin remnants
And, brushing his scapular aside,
Proceeds to dump these inside of his shirt . . .
He turns to us and speaks:
"Some people like cupcakes better. I, for one,
Care LESS for them!"
Arrogantly twisting the sterile canvas snoot of a fully charged icing-anointment utensil,
He poots forth a quarter-ounce green rosetta
Near . . .
(Let's try that again . . . )
He poots forth a quarter-ounce green rosetta
Near the summit of a dense-but-radiant muffin of his own design
Later he says:
"Some people . . . some people like cupcakes exclusively,
While I myself say there is naught, nor ought there be,
Nothing so exalted on the face of God's grey earth
As that Prince of Foods . . . The Muffin!"
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2F25.media.tumblr.com%2Ftumblr_m2olszl1dI1qgthdfo1_500.jpg&hash=b7de870efe488c2e2fdeb24f444eb79298a70dbf)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2F24.media.tumblr.com%2Ftumblr_m2olszl1dI1qgthdfo2_500.jpg&hash=b0a4e61d3b64dbce8a4e77ae6bd49f010a33e35a)
Quote from: Tossu-sama on July 09, 2013, 08:22:32 AM
This. (http://25.media.tumblr.com/f113248c52fb45e0ab8ccaaa0bd9fac3/tumblr_mmyjtiVEzc1r8f37mo1_400.gif)
I'm dying.
I like.
Seeing a cat turn it's ear inside out and then getting mad as it couldn't shake it loose
drunk Ian Gillan performing with Deep Purple:
Deep Purple - Highway Star (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LRt3PIDER94&list=TLZn5X91JoPtc#)
This prank
www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ev68U17WsYo (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ev68U17WsYo#)
I can't tell you in public since people might be able to identify me, but it's hilarious. I'm going to show them.
Let's just say....hypocrisy.
Someone who uses terms incorrectly in order to sound important :D
(https://fbcdn-sphotos-d-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-ash4/1000749_10151557573036840_797937582_n.jpg)
http://youtu.be/GvGINTSU2AI (http://youtu.be/GvGINTSU2AI)
Barney Stinson's song: "the boobs on the bus" (10h) (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1VXb1jemvS0#)
The title of an MSN article, "Woman linked to Weiner" struck my funny bone with mental images of link weiners.
Maybe Oscar Meyer can use this? :D ;D :laugh:
Seeing how much Amazon want people to pay to pre-order PS4 games.
£55 ($85)
Yeah... forget GTA. Try GTFO.
Quote from: Shantel on July 25, 2013, 10:23:49 AM
The title of an MSN article, "Woman linked to Weiner" struck my funny bone with mental images of link weiners.
Maybe Oscar Meyer can use this? :D ;D :laugh:
Hey! That's my problem!!
But in a different way ... ::)
Virginia's caption for my Kitty KAT
(btw, I don't smell a thing.)
I'm washing Caleb's laundry. Even though he is back in Canada now. It will smell like Old Spice Swagger though, which will make him happy. :P
Carrie Fisher - Wishful drinking - 2010 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IMNvoq1PQjQ#)
Finding out i put my nephews nappy on back-to-front xD
Quote from: SaveMeJeebus on August 09, 2013, 01:55:13 PM
Finding out i put my nephews nappy on back-to-front xD
Careful when you change it, they are equipped with squirt guns and can get you in the eye! ;D
Quote from: Shantel on August 09, 2013, 02:12:55 PM
Careful when you change it, they are equipped with squirt guns and can get you in the eye! ;D
:laugh: I think i have good reflexes ::)
My nephew nodding off but trying to stay awake as i was there.
shooting a shiny new 454 cassul taurus judge 7", BOOM!!! nearly dropped the thing
Quote from: Kaitlin4475 on August 11, 2013, 04:53:01 PM
shooting a shiny new 454 cassul taurus judge 7", BOOM!!! nearly dropped the thing
"Careful kid you'll shoot your pretty eye out!" Gee, that's overkill, might as well have a 155mm Howitzer!
Angry people in local newspapers,check it out if you need a laugh
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.zappateers.com%2Fbb%2Fdownload.php%3Fid%3D16584&hash=94a83dec5a28de4d243e6c3a58e77f943c835b85)
Caleb farted and it sounded like a loud tearing of time and space as I was writing my post. What made it funnier was his expression of pure shock and horror. Just dont light a match in his room!
I forgot about this
http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/norway
I saw a take away called Bulldog Burgers,I'm glad I'm a vegetarian!
Seeing this on TV
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.bbc.co.uk%2Fcbeebies%2Fbobthebuilder%2Fimg%2Fbobthebuilder_slide_main.jpg&hash=523cc11f68f85844ad0c533c8ce86e37c9106a45)
Bob's your Uncle
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fd24w6bsrhbeh9d.cloudfront.net%2Fphoto%2FaZPBP83_460sa.gif&hash=275e3bfa2caeba031841ed2d976066ec31825dd9)
Who's afraid of the big bad KAT?
This sort of made me laugh this morning ...
Unearthed Peruvian tomb confirms that women ruled over brutal ancient culture (http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/geekquinox/unearthed-peruvian-tomb-confirms-women-ruled-over-brutal-160013738.html)
Archaeologists digging in an ancient Peruvian tomb have unearthed a skeleton, confirming that a mysterious people known as the Moche were ruled by a succession of queens that presided over a brutal and ritualistic society.
Centuries ago, in the Sechura Desert of northern Peru — one of the most arid and brutal environments on our planet — the Moche people developed an equally-brutal culture. With no written history left behind, much of their society still remains a mystery, but paintings on pottery have shown researchers evidence of a rigid culture of survival, with ritualized combats where the losing side was sacrificed.
So it really doesn't matter if the society is patriarchal or matriarchal, power corrupts. I don't think that second wave feminists are going to like this. Not one little bit.
Quote from: Jamie D on August 27, 2013, 12:14:36 PM
This sort of made me laugh this morning ...
So it really doesn't matter if the society is patriarchal or matriarchal, power corrupts. I don't think that second wave feminists are going to like this. Not one little bit.
:D ;D :laugh: Yup!
A Spanish guy called Jesus started work with us this week,the day after Mary and Joseph arrived for 2 days
Listening to Scottish people trying to pronounce the word 'hurl'. Put it this way: in many Scottish accents it has two syllables and rhymes with 'Beryl'
A commercial on TV talks about coating your deck to protect it, but the way she talks sounds like she is saying something other than deck >:-)
either that or condoms work on wood.
I confessed to my friends at work that I was feeling nervous about getting my first shot today.
Their (affectionate) responses?
"Man up!"
"Grow a pair"
and my personal favourite:
"Bend over and take it like a man!"
LOL - I love those ladies! ;D
It's unbelievable. My 105€ (slightly discounted) Squier Strat sounds better and feels much better too than an almost 400€ euros Ibanez
My youngest daughter yelled up from downstairs this morning: "Mum! We need you down here urgently! It's a matter of life or death!!!!1!"
I could tell from her tone of voice that it wasn't really that serious; it sounded more like she'd spotted a spider or something. So I headed downstairs to see what the commotion was... and it turned out to be a moth. Sitting quietly on the floor, minding its own business.
So I was like "Is that all? OK, I'll go & get a glass so I can catch it & take it outside."
To which daughter replies: "OMG, I can't believe you're so nonchalant! That moth is clearly homicidal!!!!"
So yeah, I got to chuckle at my daughter's turn of phrase, and at the thought of man-eating moths.
Quote from: FTMDiaries on August 30, 2013, 09:21:12 AM
My youngest daughter yelled up from downstairs this morning: "Mum! We need you down here urgently! It's a matter of life or death!!!!1!"
I could tell from her tone of voice that it wasn't really that serious; it sounded more like she'd spotted a spider or something. So I headed downstairs to see what the commotion was... and it turned out to be a moth. Sitting quietly on the floor, minding its own business.
So I was like "Is that all? OK, I'll go & get a glass so I can catch it & take it outside."
To which daughter replies: "OMG, I can't believe you're so nonchalant! That moth is clearly homicidal!!!!"
So yeah, I got to chuckle at my daughter's turn of phrase, and at the thought of man-eating moths.
Some of these things make having kids worth all the turmoil that they sometimes produce in our lives. Some day in the future, this will give you warm smiles as you recall the drama in the man-eating moth episode! :D
Quote from: Shantel on August 30, 2013, 10:05:14 AM
Some of these things make having kids worth all the turmoil that they sometimes produce in our lives. Some day in the future, this will give you warm smiles as you recall the drama in the man-eating moth episode! :D
Yes, these moments are pure gold. :D
The scariest thing about man-eating moths? They only come out at night.
You never see them coming... ;D
Quote from: FTMDiaries on August 30, 2013, 11:09:20 AM
Yes, these moments are pure gold. :D
The scariest thing about man-eating moths? They only come out at night. You never see them coming... ;D
Like walking face first through an unseen spider web?
My dog walking around with powdered sugar spots all over the back of his head from where I was throwing bits of powdered donuts at him.
Quote from: some old bag lady on August 31, 2013, 04:14:23 PM
My dog walking around with powdered sugar spots all over the back of his head from where I was throwing bits of powdered donuts at him.
They really like people food, no matter what it is if it's people food they want some!
Maps and tangents. And silly videos.
japan video game
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sdmsRcsl_xA (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sdmsRcsl_xA)
sheep rally
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QcE5aDTszrY (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QcE5aDTszrY)
After sitting down with my bowl of cereal I'd got a fork instead of a spoon. I was so tired I couldn't be bothered going back to the kitchen so I ate the "sieved" flakes, then drank the milk from the bowl. A typical start to my day! ;D
I heard on local radio this morning that the farmer on whose land
Teletubbies was filmed became so annoyed at the
Teletubbies fans who trespassed on her land to visit the hill where the show was filmed, that she called in the builders, flattened the hill and turned the whole area into a pond. That'll teach those Teletrespassers!
Quote
'People were jumping fences and crossing cattle fields,' said 63-year-old Rosemary Harding, who runs an aquatics shop at the countryside location. 'To be honest, we're pleased to see the back of it'
In other news... apparently, people make pilgrimages to a farm where a rubbish TV programme for toddlers was last filmed 12 years ago. Who are these people?
Watching Hardcore Pawn
This:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=k6Lb3kFwJRQ
Just don't ask Kirk to sing! :laugh:
Oh what the heck...
Punish me for this...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_0hTtsqiFCc (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_0hTtsqiFCc)
Quote from: Jenny07 on September 05, 2013, 04:52:13 AM
Just don't ask Kirk to sing! :laugh:
IKR? That yell at the end is one of the funniest things in the history of ever. I can listen to William Shatner 'sing'
all day long.As a treat, how's about a little
Bohemian Rhapsody? I was part of the live release of this album a couple of years ago, and this song had me literally falling out of my seat. He's strangely brilliant:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rmPOWJtsEGc
Most guy's beards grow on their faces, mine grows right on the spot where my adam's apple is.
A skinhead with an umbrella
Quote from: Miss Bungle on September 07, 2013, 03:16:09 PM
That IS pretty funny!
It seems at some point I purchased Metallica's "Ride The Lightning" CD and I have no memory of this. I was putting away my Minor Threat "Complete Discography" CD and I noticed it in the rack and I was like "wow...cool!" :D So, I decided to throw it on.
It's just weird because usually I can remember purchasing CD's, DVD's, etc. But I have no memory of buying this. Maybe I picked it up on one of my late night grocery runs to the Wal-Monster....I don't know. :D
Uh-oh sounds like CRS to me hon, welcome to my world! ;D
Quote from: Miss Bungle on September 07, 2013, 06:47:19 PM
CRS?
Can be stated in a crude way, but for the sake of the kids "Can't Remember Stuff!"
This. It totally cracked me up. I guess because I've been awake all night and it's like 8am now... but it sent me into fits of giggles. The video as much as the song. ;D
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NCHq0m67lq8
This pair of intercom announcements at work this morning:
"John, can you please phone Mary when you have a minute".
... two minutes later ...
"John, can you please call Mary back, she's out of the toilet now and is ready to take your call".
Quote from: FTMDiaries on September 11, 2013, 06:45:20 AM
This pair of intercom announcements at work this morning:
"John, can you please phone Mary when you have a minute".
... two minutes later ...
"John, can you please call Mary back, she's out of the toilet now and is ready to take your call".
OMG! :D ;D :laugh:
Quote from: Shantel on September 11, 2013, 09:23:55 AM
OMG! :D ;D :laugh:
I know, right? I had a client on the phone at the time and he heard the announcement over the intercom. I had no idea what to say... so I just carried on as if it hadn't happened. :laugh:
Quote from: FTMDiaries on September 11, 2013, 09:54:14 AM
I know, right? I had a client on the phone at the time and he heard the announcement over the intercom. I had no idea what to say... so I just carried on as if it hadn't happened. :laugh:
What else could you do? What a no-class person on the intercom huh? They should be banned from using it!
Dave Gahan's smexy dance moves in this 1982 performance of Just Can't Get Enough. I found myself mimicking his moves all round my kitchen, laughing my backside off.
My favourite bits are around 0:48; 1:25; 1:42 and 2:40. Dunno why, but it just tickled me.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qap24Z41QI8
And guess what? He still dances like that today. Love it!
Reminiscing about when my mom and step-dad banned me from participating in the naming of my younger stepbrother's pets >:-)
Quote from: V M on September 17, 2013, 01:25:30 AM
Reminiscing about when my mom and step-dad banned me from participating in the naming of my younger stepbrother's pets >:-)
So don't leave us in suspense,why were you banned?
My mom called me and told me she had told my Grandma that I had gotten a job. My grandma told my mom that she had been doing a LOT of praying over the lady who basically caused the firing to happen. She said she had been doing that because she wants to go up to the lady and slap her across the face because NO ONE hurts her baby girl. XD
Even though it involves me being called a girl, it still CRACKED ME UP. My grandma is one of those cute little old ladies without a mean bone in her. So to hear her say something like that was HILARIOUS.
Me, myself and I being a total idiot. (http://25.media.tumblr.com/694212ed5971f00a4a3ec933bfbb9c5e/tumblr_mtc67qcfvb1rhq6who1_500.jpg)
Quote from: Darkie on September 17, 2013, 08:12:19 PM
My mom called me and told me she had told my Grandma that I had gotten a job. My grandma told my mom that she had been doing a LOT of praying over the lady who basically caused the firing to happen. She said she had been doing that because she wants to go up to the lady and slap her across the face because NO ONE hurts her baby girl. XD
Even though it involves me being called a girl, it still CRACKED ME UP. My grandma is one of those cute little old ladies without a mean bone in her. So to hear her say something like that was HILARIOUS.
What a swell grandma, she loves you hon!
I don't remember laughing today, but yesterday I laughed at a bit on the daily show about a (trumped up for laughs) rivalry between tennessee and georgia. I've connections to both locales and I know how badly Atlanta needs water and how tense it is between them and the Carolinas and Alabama, but hadn't seen any Tennessee drama. "Butt-chugging" is a word I really didn't need to learn. xD
"Butt-chugging"? LOL... Makes me think of various individuals for various reasons that I will not mention >:-) Just looked up what that means :icon_blah: EEEWWW, Very dangerous
Quote from: V M on September 21, 2013, 01:07:54 AM
"Butt-chugging"? LOL... Makes me think of various individuals for various reasons that I will not mention >:-) Just looked up what that means :icon_blah: EEEWWW, Very dangerous
I just looked it up too...
...I don't want to live on this planet anymore. XD
Quote from: V M on September 21, 2013, 01:07:54 AM
"Butt-chugging"? LOL... Makes me think of various individuals for various reasons that I will not mention >:-) Just looked up what that means :icon_blah: EEEWWW, Very dangerous
Yuck, how repulsive!
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.brentalflossthecomic.com%2Fimg%2Fcomic%2F49.jpeg&hash=e212aa7dfad0865a9d187c76731a1a0a17e84286)
Bungle, I thought of you today! Mom and I were garage saleing and I found a Get Along Gang book. I took a picture of it. XD
A support English heritage windscreen sticker in a Subaru!
Quote from: Liam Erik on September 22, 2013, 10:22:51 AM
My brother had his wedding at our home last week, a nice casual type thing, no perfectionism from anybody, which is great. I didn't realize they were going to have their little ceremony in front of the tree by the kitchen door. Otherwise I'd have been sure to take the chicken nooses out of it. I use them to hang up headless chickens by their feet to drain before plucking them. The bride and a lot of her family and friends probably wouldn't know that, given that they are vegetarians... Well, as long as they don't ask what those strings are swaying in the background of their wedding photos, we'll be fine :eusa_doh:
That's a riot! :D ;D :laugh:
Dr. James White made a joke about Dr. Michael Brown and suggested they go around and do the Calvinist/Arminian show. LOL
A rather peculiar zucchini from the garden...
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi569.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fss131%2FVirginias_Stuff%2FPicture49_zps6ca0f405.jpg&hash=b0f2596b69f9a742f08cca10d9881a8ee6bcde10)
Quote from: V M on September 27, 2013, 06:01:53 PM
A rather peculiar zucchini from the garden...
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi569.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fss131%2FVirginias_Stuff%2FPicture49_zps6ca0f405.jpg&hash=b0f2596b69f9a742f08cca10d9881a8ee6bcde10)
Ahem-er can you be trusted with it? ;D :D :laugh:
Quote from: V M on September 27, 2013, 06:01:53 PM
A rather peculiar zucchini from the garden...
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi569.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fss131%2FVirginias_Stuff%2FPicture49_zps6ca0f405.jpg&hash=b0f2596b69f9a742f08cca10d9881a8ee6bcde10)
Oh, my! That is peculiar, I've never seen a zucchini reading a notebook before! >:-)
(https://fbcdn-sphotos-b-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-ash3/943350_450981911681336_2106134845_n.jpg)
I know this plays on stereotypes but with many people i know, including me, it is true.
Quote from: ZootAllures/BlackNapkins! on September 28, 2013, 03:59:06 PM
I know this plays on stereotypes but with many people i know, including me, it is true.
Lol it so is.
I was typing up a PM to another FtM here earlier today, and I tried to type 'PMs' as part of my message... but for some reason my fingers thought I wanted to type 'PMS'.
Oops, no - that's not a subject we particularly want to discuss. Glad I spotted it before hitting 'send'. ;D
There are few things funnier than watching a cookery programme with an immature teenager who had no idea how much innuendo goes on in these shows. ;)
That's right, Great British Bake Off. I'm looking at you.
A French Bulldog,they have such funny faces
I'm so silly I make my ownself laugh.
Was in the GTA V strip club and got on stage when the next stripper was about to come on. when they introduced her I came out (Trevor in his underwear) and the stripper was telling me ot get off the stage LOL.
This was yesterday but one of the anime characters I wanted to marry when I was younger is voiced by the same guy who plays Light/Kira from Deathnote. Now, the character I love, Quatre, is a very timid loving person. So, they took a clip from the few episodes that he snaps and put the laugh Kira does when he tells everyone he really is Kira and put it to that. It was hilarious. Almost as good as "I TAKE A CHIP AND EAT IT."
The video clip from Sons of Anarchy where Half Sack's testicle implant has become infected and just as he shows it to Dr Tara Tig walks in and blows chunks when he sees it
Hahahaha Gamestop trying to sell the Xbox One with the ad that actually says "Easily turn Xbox One and Kinect on or off" HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA LIKE THAT'S SUPPOSED TO BE AMAZING! hahahahahahahahhaha xbox one will fail and I'm a Sony fanboy! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAA#MalachitetheTroll
Playing GTA V and have another bounty on my head so I climped on a roof after I robbed a store and some guy was trying to claim the bounty. He drove so fast to get to me and realized I was on the roof so he started climbing so I got out my shotgun. I was ready for him to get to the top so I could say "surprise"! But I think he knew I was waiting for him so he climbed down and drove off and I turned my mic on and trash talked him. I wish someone else would try to claim THIS bounty while I'm on the roof. I'm looking on the map and it look like a potential person may try to claim the bounty. We shall see what happens.
LOL the way that guy lef was hilarious though.
Today's PA Strip:
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fart.penny-arcade.com%2Fphotos%2Fi-QnHSJGQ%2F0%2F950x10000%2Fi-QnHSJGQ-950x10000.jpg&hash=8a8c40b51242cff82ac6a8065f68d4872c34564e)
Can't believe it's been already nearly 10 years since I played Pokémon Red... And I did not ever played the series again after Crystal.
I subscribe to a bunch of discount voucher sites, and I got an email through this morning offering me a tantalising, Earth-shattering, bargain-basement deal of a £20 discount off a flight to Australia! Wowsers. ::)
The cheapest plane ticket is £579, not to mention the high cost of food, transport and accommodation in Oz. That £20 makes all the difference then.
For reference, £20 is pretty much what I spend on a single trip to McDonald's.
Quote from: FTMDiaries on October 18, 2013, 05:23:57 AM
I subscribe to a bunch of discount voucher sites, and I got an email through this morning offering me a tantalising, Earth-shattering, bargain-basement deal of a £20 discount off a flight to Australia! Wowsers. ::)
The cheapest plane ticket is £579, not to mention the high cost of food, transport and accommodation in Oz. That £20 makes all the difference then.
For reference, £20 is pretty much what I spend on a single trip to McDonald's.
Could be like Ryanair advertising 1 euro flights; add taxes and fees on top of that. AirAsia does the same thing, so I'd suspect it's via Kuala Lumpur then.
Vickie Gurrero's "excuse me" line
The plastic gangster who stayed the night and then said he was going to write a rubbish review of the hotel,but if I gave him his money back and another £100 on top he could make it go away!
Quote from: big kim on October 19, 2013, 04:56:24 PM
The plastic gangster who stayed the night and then said he was going to write a rubbish review of the hotel,but if I gave him his money back and another £100 on top he could make it go away!
The cheek!
The Fanfic Critic's video of episode 207 haha!
Ahhh... this is the thread I need :D I can't believe I just found it.
Yesterday we were at a work party for a woman who's getting married. She and I are pretty good work friends, I think...
She was sitting next to me and we were getting ready to leave... her back was turned slightly, so she could see me and where I was standing. This other woman walks by and, planning to say congrats etc., starts rubbing her on the lower back. First of all... that's just weird, but not only did my work friend think it was me (until she turned around) but I KNEW she thought it was me, given our standing positions.
It was pretty hilarious after she figured it out... but a split second of awkwardness for at least two of the three people involved!
I may be a woman (not that any of them know yet), but I will never feel comfortable doing that to anyone I'm not in a very close relationship with... friend or lover, male or female. Certainly not at work!!
Quote from: kabit on October 24, 2013, 04:26:06 AM
Ahhh... this is the thread I need :D I can't believe I just found it.
Yesterday we were at a work party for a woman who's getting married. She and I are pretty good work friends, I think...
She was sitting next to me and we were getting ready to leave... her back was turned slightly, so she could see me and where I was standing. This other woman walks by and, planning to say congrats etc., starts rubbing her on the lower back. First of all... that's just weird, but not only did my work friend think it was me (until she turned around) but I KNEW she thought it was me, given our standing positions.
It was pretty hilarious after she figured it out... but a split second of awkwardness for at least two of the three people involved!
I may be a woman (not that any of them know yet), but I will never feel comfortable doing that to anyone I'm not in a very close relationship with... friend or lover, male or female. Certainly not at work!!
Good thinking! What I'm curious to know is did it seem that she was enjoying it before she realized who it really was? That would be an indicator of how comfortable she is with you right now.
Quote from: Shantel on October 24, 2013, 10:06:40 AM
Good thinking! What I'm curious to know is did it seem that she was enjoying it before she realized who it really was? That would be an indicator of how comfortable she is with you right now.
LOL... no, but I don't know who would be. We laughed about it this morning and agreed that it was weird... she just felt better when she saw who did it because it was clearly not out of interest at that point.
Quote from: kabit on October 24, 2013, 10:15:13 AM
LOL... no, but I don't know who would be. We laughed about it this morning and agreed that it was weird... she just felt better when she saw who did it because it was clearly not out of interest at that point.
Nice lady!
She's a good work friend... and hopefully will be accepting when the time comes.
This morning, one of the Hilton front desk ladies. We were friendly before, but now after suddenly going full time and checking in as Karla, we began to have 'girl talk'. We were talking about dress shops locally, and she recounted getting stuck in a dress and needing to call for help.
I laughed, as I used to believe that kind of thing only happens to transwomen... happened to me once in a thrift shop and i didn't ask for help until several minutes had passed... the dress over my head, arms pinned.
I have to get an antibiotic to treat my strep throat, and the package said this:
You should not use Biaxin if you have a life-threatening heart rhythm disorder, a history of Long QT syndrome
My friend said "guess you can't take it, you're too much of a QT." ;D Lmao.
That awkward moment this morning when my SatNav told me I had 16 minutes to get to an appointment that was an hour away from me.
After a good minute of panicking & trying to figure out how I'd miscalculated so badly, I realised that I hadn't adjusted my SatNav's clock when our clocks went back on Sunday, so I really had an hour and 16 minutes to get there. D'oh!
Watching Ashley from Hardcore Pawn walks when she gets mad.
Quote from: Malachite on October 29, 2013, 07:48:46 PM
Watching Ashley from Hardcore Pawn walks when she gets mad.
Haven't seen her but I can tell when the gal across the street is pissed by her hilarious body language. She comes bursting out of the house and get's her back up real straight, does the violent hair toss and puts her cell phone up to her ear and struts around, her other arm and hand waiving as if she's lecturing someone.
Quote from: Malachite on October 29, 2013, 07:48:46 PM
Watching Ashley from Hardcore Pawn walks when she gets mad.
Ashley is a b**** if there ever was one. She seems to always try to start stuff with customers and coworkers. In normal work environments where she wouldn't be related to the owner, she'd be fired in short order.
Quote from: big head horsey-face on October 30, 2013, 11:28:39 AM
Ashley is a b**** if there ever was one. She seems to always try to start stuff with customers and coworkers. In normal work environments where she wouldn't be related to the owner, she'd be fired in short order.
And you would go :eusa_boohoo: :eusa_clap: :icon_evil_laugh:
Quote from: Shantel on October 30, 2013, 09:01:00 AM
Haven't seen her but I can tell when the gal across the street is pissed by her hilarious body language. She comes bursting out of the house and get's her back up real straight, does the violent hair toss and puts her cell phone up to her ear and struts around, her other arm and hand waiving as if she's lecturing someone.
LOL that's how many people on Hardcore Pawn act when they don't get amount of money they wanted for their items.
Quote from: big head horsey-face on October 30, 2013, 11:28:39 AM
Ashley is a b**** if there ever was one. She seems to always try to start stuff with customers and coworkers. In normal work environments where she wouldn't be related to the owner, she'd be fired in short order.
I know right? Seth can be just as much frigid, but I was actually happy when Ashley had left for a while. I honesntly don't see how Seth puts up with her. She can be quite possessive when it comes to the store.
This :D
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2F25.media.tumblr.com%2F5b4b9deb260ab127eca76523d588568d%2Ftumblr_mvi11osjkG1s02vreo1_400.gif&hash=7be30f64a9d98b7799489b9f106a78b0278523ac)
Quote from: Devilish Goddess on October 30, 2013, 05:20:49 PM
This :D
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2F25.media.tumblr.com%2F5b4b9deb260ab127eca76523d588568d%2Ftumblr_mvi11osjkG1s02vreo1_400.gif&hash=7be30f64a9d98b7799489b9f106a78b0278523ac)
Ouch, that was a nasty face plant! >:(
Quote from: Shantel on October 30, 2013, 05:51:48 PM
Ouch, that was a nasty face plant! >:(
Who told her to race on heels? *Not that I wouldn't* :D
Looked like it was one of those high heel runs if I'm not mistaken. The others looked to be wearing heels as well.
Quote from: big head horsey-face on October 30, 2013, 06:10:33 PM
Looked like it was one of those high heel runs if I'm not mistaken. The others looked to be wearing heels as well.
Only time I run with heels is when I feel like I'm about to get brutally murder.. :-\
chances are that I will kill myself before the attacker gets to me..
Quote from: Devilish Goddess on October 30, 2013, 06:12:49 PM
Only time I run with heels is when I feel like I'm about to get brutally murder.. :-\
chances are that I will kill myself before the attacker gets to me..
Heels can be a dangerous weapon. I recently read about a woman that hit her boyfriend on the head with one of her spike heels and killed him. They are known to poke holes in floors especially on linoleum even when worn by little women, there's a lot of PSI pressure under these heels.
The French students in the classroom that is used for my math class on Thursdays have terrible accents. Funny to listen to, but not as agonizing as dad's.
the toddler next door is starting to form little sentences on his own now, though he sometimes twists the words saying the syllables in wrong order, sometimes creating hilarious phrases. so he's learnt a new sentence today, that is we cut paper with scissors. you ask him what do you do with scissors, he'd reply 'we cut paper' BUT, he can't say cut properly so twists it everytime he says it, and the outcome is the equivalent for f***! you could laugh for hours seeing how he says it with utmost confidence! then he laughs with us too! i just adore that kid, i wish i could get rid of my jealousy for his you-know-what organs.
just in case it confuses you, please note that the kid was not speaking english, but our native language.
My new female friend was getting her hair done and the hairstylist asked her if I was her husband, and she told her no, but I soon will be. :)
My mom made me sign a life insurance paper. I attributed it to the fact that I told her I'm stll going to buy a moped against her wishes lol.
Quote from: Malachite on November 02, 2013, 03:14:30 PM
My mom made me sign a life insurance paper.
That's funny?
The sad fact is, life insurance for most people means just enough money to bury you so your family isn't burdened with it.
"The average cost of a funeral in 2012 was more than $8,500 for a burial service and $3,700 for a cremation service"
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on November 02, 2013, 03:22:14 PM
The sad fact is, life insurance for most people means just enough money to bury you so your family isn't burdened with it.
"The average cost of a funeral in 2012 was more than $8,500 for a burial service and $3,700 for a cremation service"
I have no qualms about sticking my family with the cost of cremation. They'll be getting a really nice house out of it...
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on November 02, 2013, 03:22:14 PM
The sad fact is, life insurance for most people means just enough money to bury you so your family isn't burdened with it.
"The average cost of a funeral in 2012 was more than $8,500 for a burial service and $3,700 for a cremation service"
That's pretty much what my mother said. If she can avoid those costs by donating my body to science then I don't mind. They probably wouldnt' take my body but it's worth a shot.
Quote from: LordKAT on November 02, 2013, 03:34:01 PM
Now it is funny.
Yeah when my mom gave me the paper I said "It's because I'm going to drive a moped and because I'll be a beginner driver, isn't it?"
She shifted her eyes and started to laugh.
The opening scene in an episode of 'Gilmore Girls'. I heard it playing in another room as I was just waking up. I cannot now even recall what happened in these three minutes - though I believe it involved Lorelia, Rory, and the parents/grandparents. I do recall a bit of belly laughter rippling through my body as I lay there wrapped in a warm quilt. Nice way to start another day...
Slightly NSFW-ishThis is the front-page story in my local newspaper today: Fight for your ->-bleeped-<-gots! (http://www.bristolpost.co.uk/Fight--%3E-bleeped-%3C-gots-Bristol-s-Mr-Brain-s-launches/story-20038124-detail/story.html)
I know the word is used as a homophobic slur in the US, but here in England it is the somewhat ridiculous name of a delicious dish of oversized meatballs, which are usually served with mash or chips, peas and gravy.
Here's the image from the article, in case you've never seen a ->-bleeped-<-got before and don't fancy risking a Google Image Search:
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.bristolpost.co.uk%2Fimages%2Flocalworld%2Fugc-images%2F276268%2FArticle%2Fimages%2F20038124%2F5457578-large.jpg&hash=c96f36d0cbec9585505ece481a0731923b356595)
There's even a helpful related article on that page with tips on 'How to make ->-bleeped-<-gots'. Oh, and it is a source of delight for me to know that for many years, my mother-in-law worked in a ->-bleeped-<-got-making factory.
The reason for the article is that a couple of people have had their Facebooks locked because they talked about, or posted pictures of, plates of ->-bleeped-<-gots. A simple misunderstanding of a very innocent English word that has negative American connotations.
->-bleeped-<-gots are widely available in pubs here in the West Country, and part of the fun of ordering them is the innuendo you can come up with while you wait for them to arrive.
So, in case you're curious: yes, I have eaten several ->-bleeped-<-gots in my time. They're hot and delicious, and there's nothing quite as satisfying as stuffing your face with a nice, big chunk of meat... and ->-bleeped-<-gots certainly provide you with that. And they're at their best when they come with loads of gravy... ;D
Here's another for you!!
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fjoshblackman.com%2Fblog%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2013%2F01%2FiStock_000004312564XSmall1.jpg&hash=22899d78a9f92e54d540bcd3e5739e41d0534d22)
and yeah... I searched on "bundle of sticks"
Quote from: kabit on November 06, 2013, 06:27:38 AM
Here's another for you!!
Those look a bit dry... perhaps you need more gravy. ;D
Hallmark just learned how it can be offensive to hide the old meanings of words, too.
Here's to hoping everyone has a gay holidays!! ;D
I've often enjoyed the difference in semantics between English speaking countries. I watched some Aussies play a game of football in a dry Vietnamese rice paddy against a group of Kiwis, later when discussing the game with the Aussie group, I made the comment that they were a spunky team and that I had been rooting for them. One of the Aussies turned to his friends and said, "Blimey mates, I think we have a poofter here!" :icon_redface: :D
Quote from: Shantel on November 06, 2013, 08:07:13 AM
I've often enjoyed the difference in semantics between English speaking countries. I watched some Aussies play a game of football in a dry Vietnamese rice paddy against a group of Kiwis, later when discussing the game with the Aussie group, I made the comment that they were a spunky team and that I had been rooting for them. One of the Aussies turned to his friends and said, "Blimey mates, I think we have a poofter here!" :icon_redface: :D
I may need a translation! What were the offending words? (I do understand the Aussie's statement... thanks to the Monty Python "Bruces" sketch).
Quote from: kabit on November 06, 2013, 08:24:49 AM
I may need a translation! What were the offending words? (I do understand the Aussie's statement... thanks to the Monty Python "Bruces" sketch).
Root as in sex
spunk as in a certain fluid
I was mortified!
Quote from: Shantel on November 06, 2013, 08:31:06 AM
Root as in sex
spunk as in a certain fluid
I was mortified!
LOL your mortification is our humor ;)
I figured on "spunk." I was wondering about "root..." the double whammy probably made it pretty hilarious.
Quote from: Shantel on November 06, 2013, 08:31:06 AM
Root as in sex
spunk as in a certain fluid
I was mortified!
LOL - just as well you didn't comment about any of them falling on their fannies! ;D
I had a similar situation when I moved to the UK from South Africa. In South Africa in the 1980s & 1990s, computers had two types of removable disks: floppy disks were the large, flexible black ones... but eventually the smaller, harder ones came out too. To differentiate between them, South Africans called the smaller ones 'stiffy disks'.
So when I moved to the UK, imagine my male colleague's surprise when I asked him whether I could use his stiffy for a bit... :embarrassed:
Quote from: FTMDiaries on November 06, 2013, 08:37:16 AM
LOL - just as well you didn't comment about any of them falling on their fannies! ;D
I had a similar situation when I moved to the UK from South Africa. In South Africa in the 1980s & 1990s, computers had two types of removable disks: floppy disks were the large, flexible black ones... but eventually the smaller, harder ones came out too. To differentiate between them, South Africans called the smaller ones 'stiffy disks'.
So when I moved to the UK, imagine my male colleague's surprise when I asked him whether I could use his stiffy for a bit... :embarrassed:
LMAO!! :D ;D :laugh:
Quote from: kabit on November 06, 2013, 08:35:56 AM
LOL your mortification is our humor ;)
I figured on "spunk." I was wondering about "root..." the double whammy probably made it pretty hilarious.
Yeah, I was in the paratroops and that wasn't anything any of us would have considered, so their remark was quite an affront though I took it in good stead as I was outnumbered at the time anyway.
Thinking about when I paid in change $2.50 for renewing my permit at the DMV.
Quote from: Malachite on November 07, 2013, 06:03:34 PM
Thinking about when I paid in change $2.50 for renewing my permit at the DMV.
You're not insinuating that it was money wasted are you? You are still planning to get that license aren't you?
Quote from: Shantel on November 07, 2013, 06:11:04 PM
You're not insinuating that it was money wasted are you? You are still planning to get that license aren't you?
Where did that come from? >.> I don't think it was money wasted. If I didn't renew it I would have to take the knowledge test over and
that would be a waste of money.
As for my license, I don't think I have much of a choice. At this point, my only other option is to immediately move up north somewhere with adequate public transportation and start my life over....but that's not feasable right now.
Hallloween candy video's. I shouldn't be laughing.
Quote from: LordKAT on November 07, 2013, 08:36:40 PM
Hallloween candy video's. I shouldn't be laughing.
I felt the same way. It was kind of cute and funny but kind of disgusting at the same time.
LOL... A young couple, well younger than me anyway confessed to one of their religious leaders that they had been engaging in sexual relationships
The religious leader told them that they should only meet in public areas and not be alone together in their apt.s
Well okay, they have followed his advise and have been making out in the lobby getting rather handy with each other
Not the kinda thing some folks want to walk out to see
Maybe I should get a vid. cam. >:-)
Quote from: V M on November 07, 2013, 11:08:26 PM
LOL... A young couple, well younger than me anyway confessed to one of their religious leaders that they had been engaging in sexual relationships
The religious leader told them that they should only meet in public areas and not be alone together in their apt.s
Well okay, they have followed his advise and have been making out in the lobby getting rather handy with each other
Not the kinda thing some folks want to walk out to see
Maybe I should get a vid. cam. >:-)
Micky & Sylvia's 1950's song "Love is strange" just came to mind. That intense hormonal drive in young folks is just unstoppable! :D
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FmrG10Sh.gif&hash=9b3d2882c2be606bdd75ae1dcf5b17ee0ff1c4f9)
People who think they know so much, but in reality, they know so little.
Usually this kind of thing makes me angry, today I just have to laugh at it. I'm just in too good of a mood lately for things to bother me.
Quote from: LordKAT on November 08, 2013, 10:42:27 PM
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FmrG10Sh.gif&hash=9b3d2882c2be606bdd75ae1dcf5b17ee0ff1c4f9)
They are so cute and cuddly!!
Mis doogle! I fed her a bit of red velvet cupcake and she got a bit in her eyebrow. She is a silly pie!! <3
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fsouthparkstudios.mtvnimages.com%2Fimages%2Fshows%2Fsouthpark%2Fvertical_video%2Fseason_17%2F1707%2Fsouth-park-1707-black-friday-WINTERISCOMING-clip08.jpg&hash=451f5eb57f57bd42b6ffb17785b5bf7d1e938894)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fforums.stevehoffman.tv%2Fattachments%2F541785_698283190181907_662743890_n-jpg.302627%2F&hash=2aeff0b780b831165076eefd669102ad44108d1a)
I call this one: Fabulous Dog Is Fabulous
I saw it on another site.
http://video.bobdylan.com/desktop.html
2 of my coworkers and I played a friendly little trick on another coworker today. He was swamped with work & while he's not awfully verbal, he gets pretty melodramatic with the loud sighing, and muttering & cursing under his breath. So he left his desk for a few & the three of us wrote up 3 fake assignments for him, all of them urgent & bizarre. We had another coworker slip them on his desk & then we all waited for him to find them. We three turned bright pink stifling our anticipatory laughter & when he finally saw his new 'assignments' we all laughed so hard we were crying & coughing & peeing. Good stuff, especially working in hospice--we need levity.
Today I was shopping and saw a T-shirt with the following words:
I will drink until I fall
then I will keep drinking lying down
My translation might have taken the funny of the text (original in portuguese), but it was enough to make me laugh really hard and everybody started to stare at me!
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg1.mlstatic.com%2Fcamiseta-bebo-ate-cair-e-continuo-bebendo-deitado-wimza_MLB-O-2833654292_062012.jpg&hash=9fe85797bd151daf89bfbd8e91755703df6d7d2d)
Laughing at Hardcore Pawn where Les told Ashley and Seth that he's running a family buisness and Seth asks Les "You sure she's (Ashley) family?" LOL!
I have over 7000 unread emails. Hey, blame it on the ridiculous storage space email providers give you these days.
The name "Hardcore Pawn".
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fd24w6bsrhbeh9d.cloudfront.net%2Fphoto%2FarpMYOB_460s.jpg&hash=131e0a40f32534ba68e706eae16cfa8555c89d9b)
Quote from: ZootAllures/BlackNapkins! on November 20, 2013, 01:26:46 PM
...
Pet Sweat? What is this... Pocari for Dogs?!
I have an unopened bottle of Pocari Sweat in my fridge (unless someone threw it out, gasp). It's from Japan, not USA, too!
Meta Sweat!
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2F1gVo4I9.jpg&hash=1b9e0d00e773c2694ad1c6017085d249f4e4cf46)
the new south park episode.
Japanese Princess Kenny
Enough said.
Quote from: dalebert on November 20, 2013, 11:24:08 AM
The name "Hardcore Pawn".
Lets not forget "Pawn Stars" :D
Several band members joking around and changing the lyrics in a Zappa concert i've almost finished listening to. More than a half of the lyrics to one song on it were adlibbed. Won't see that from any modern popular act.
I went to the store to buy a few things including a bottle of white wine vinegar because it works well with cooking poultry and seafood and this brand happened to be on sale for a good price
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fts1.mm.bing.net%2Fth%3Fid%3DH.4807504134209696%26amp%3Bpid%3D15.1&hash=8dcef8d9ec5219216605f3a5997408182c4c05e1)
Well, the teenage guy bagging my groceries holds up the bottle and exclaims that he really liked the shape of the bottle while subconsciously stroking the neck of it a few times
The checkout girl and I both looked rather surprised and replied "um, .... Okay" at the same time
I felt a little sad for the kid because I think he may have suddenly realized his folly
Quote from: V M on November 28, 2013, 12:26:13 AM
I went to the store to buy a few things including a bottle of white wine vinegar because it works well with cooking poultry and seafood and this brand happened to be on sale for a good price
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fts1.mm.bing.net%2Fth%3Fid%3DH.4807504134209696%26amp%3Bpid%3D15.1&hash=8dcef8d9ec5219216605f3a5997408182c4c05e1)
Well, the teenage guy bagging my groceries holds up the bottle and exclaims that he really liked the shape of the bottle while subconsciously stroking the neck of it a few times
The checkout girl and I both looked rather surprised and replied "um, .... Okay" at the same time
I felt a little sad for the kid because I think he may have suddenly realized his folly
That is really funny!! :D
Friend told me a totally real life ribald story from his sexcapades which was both gross and hilarious. Don't know if it was the red wine but I couldn't stop laughing. I shan't recount it here as it would probably get me banned!
Ha, there's a thread for that. ;)
My mom thinks that I have lost my mind and become too "obsessed" with the Get Along Gang.
::) ::)
Quote from: Miss_Bungle1991 on November 28, 2013, 11:24:44 PM
My mom thinks that I have lost my mind and become too "obsessed" with the Get Along Gang.
::) ::)
Could be worse! ;) ;)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fandroidspin.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2012%2F11%2FMy-little-pony-main.jpg&hash=768189dd44d4238725cc49e2aae2cb8061667e8a)
Yeah... I'm watching through the series on netflix now. . . don't really care what people think, and I'm not afraid to mention it -- well, not to people who know I'm trans. It's about the only show that won't trigger me right now.
Is that the old one or the new one? I never got into MLP when I was a kid. I found out later that a couple of voice actresses from the Get Along Gang worked on that show. I never knew that (but I never watched it, so how could I know? :D)
Quote from: Miss_Bungle1991 on November 29, 2013, 07:36:43 AM
Is that the old one or the new one? I never got into MLP when I was a kid. I found out later that a couple of voice actresses from the Get Along Gang worked on that show. I never knew that (but I never watched it, so could I know? :D)
The new one... it's really a good show :)
I'm no pegasister yet, though... lol
"Pegasister" :D Cute.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FdZ_QveGaTU
I was playing this song last night at my Mom's house. My brother was like, "what the hell is that? I would rather hear your Death Metal music than that stuff."
I looked at him in shock and I was, like, "really?".
:D :D :D
I never thought he would say something like that.
The word wicked! It just makes me giggle! :D
Quote from: Miss_Bungle1991 on November 29, 2013, 08:18:11 AM
"Pegasister" :D Cute.
yeah... I didn't make that one up!! It's a female brony.
I doubt I'll be drawn that far in... though a cute t-shirt wouldn't be bad ;)
Quote from: Miss_Bungle1991 on November 28, 2013, 11:24:44 PM
My mom thinks that I have lost my mind and become too "obsessed" with the Get Along Gang.
::) ::)
Gee, wonder what would make her think that? :icon_lol:
Quote from: Shantel on November 29, 2013, 09:52:39 AM
Gee, wonder what would make her think that? :icon_lol:
Honestly...I have no idea. It's a total mystery to me.
I mean...all I have are several items of them on my computer desk (3 of Dotty, 5 of Portia..although, actually one is of Patricia, Portia's younger cousin that lives in Pine Corners). I only have four plushies of them on my couch (from left to right: Doris Dog, Patricia Porcupine, Dotty Dog, Portia Porcupine.) and I am slowly building a wardrobe for them. I only have a few Dotty and Portia shirts and I only blab about my fanfics in certain family social situations.
Yeah...it's a mystery to me.
Quote from: Miss_Bungle1991 on November 29, 2013, 12:39:47 PM
Honestly...I have no idea. It's a total mystery to me.
I mean...all I have are several items of them on my computer desk (3 of Dotty, 5 of Portia..although, actually one is of Patricia, Portia's younger cousin that lives in Pine Corners). I only have four plushies of them on my couch (from left to right: Doris Dog, Patricia Porcupine, Dotty Dog, Portia Porcupine.) and I am slowly building a wardrobe for them. I only have a few Dotty and Portia shirts and I only blab about my fanfics in certain family social situations.
Yeah...it's a mystery to me.
There are worse obsessions!! ♥
Quote from: kabit on November 29, 2013, 12:54:16 PM
There are worse obsessions!! ♥
And that is exactly what I tell them. They are too hung up on this "age" thing. So what if I am 36? That doesn't mean squat to me.
Quote from: Miss_Bungle1991 on November 29, 2013, 01:13:11 PM
And that is exactly what I tell them. They are too hung up on this "age" thing. So what if I am 36? That doesn't mean squat to me.
Hormonally I feel about 8... I really wonder how much that drives these interests.
Quote from: kabit on November 29, 2013, 01:40:46 PM
Hormonally I feel about 8... I really wonder how much that drives these interests.
I feel about 12 to 16 depending on the day and situation at the time.
I don't think it matters much in my case as far as my current interests/obsessions are concerned. Honestly, I only rediscovered the Get Along Gang out of pure chance due to something that happened on another forum. I hadn't even thought about it since 1989ish.
But once I saw the video of the opening credits via Youtube that someone linked (They meant it in a sarcastic fashion because there was a lot of stupid bickering going at the time...and still is...whatever.) But when I saw that again, it honestly felt like running into a long lost pal. It was that level of excitement for me. Yeah, that may sound dumb/cheesy/stupid, etc to some people but I don't care. Once that happened, it all just exploded from there.
Quote from: Shantel on November 29, 2013, 04:07:33 PM
No it's not, it may be an obsession of sorts I don't know, but so what? You could be an alcoholic, drug addict or a sex addict, don't worry hon, you're doing just fine and no-one's making fun of you.
I don't care if someone makes fun of me. It's already happened and I just sat back and laughed at what a bunch of worthless fools they were. Besides, most people are quite brave when they have a computer to hide behind.
As far as addictions go: I've been there with booze, done that with quite a few drugs but I never had a sexual addiction. Now...cartoon/music/noise/fic addictions?
Oh yeah....I've got those and got it bad. :D
I was reminded of some various funny from Thanksgiving & Black Friday...
My wife and her brother can get dirty sometimes. They both act pretty cool around me, still, too. The first one should be funny to the general audience... #2, probably just to me.
#1
My BIL came over on Thanksgiving evening (waiting to go to Walmart with my wife -- opened at 1 am around here). I was on Susan's chat. I laughed a few times and I'd just say it was stuff from "chat." My wife was shopping Tea (kids' clothes) online and having difficulty.
When they were finally getting ready to go, he asked what the chat was... and I said it's an IRC kind of room. And he said "oh is it about Tea"
Well... I laughed and said yes... so he asked "like how to brew it and stuff"... "no, not really." ... "It's really about Tea?" ... "Yeah, and E."
He figured it out... I think.
#2
Black Friday evening, my BIL was driving me and my wife home from the blood center (where we both passed out giving blood ;)). They were being a little dirty, but I really can't remember how it came up. Basically they were discussing what I did in my bedroom and seemed to figure it's all porn and masturbation down here.
I told them that really doesn't happen much any more.
I don't think they believed me... people really have a very limited understanding of me... but this one just seemed funny.
a recording of my father's group live in concert. They were so awful, man, with delusions of grandeur and completely stoned. Another reason to stay away from my father........
He's not a bad drummer though. He's actually the only person who sounds halfway decent on it.
The guitar players sound the worst. Completely behind the beat.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6rtgwWjKHBw
All those selfies lol!
From the securities regjlstions Examples & Explanions book:
QuoteThe exclusive search for "security" can be a wonderful, if challenging, amusement.
lmao :laugh: "amusement" :icon_hahano:
When people type defiantly instead of definitely and it totally changes the meaning of their sentence while still remaining a proper English sentence. I'm defiantly going to do it on purpose more often. Hehehe.
The same can be said for those working on there collage degrees, to. >:-)
When people use uncommon or obscure words to sound smart, but use them incorrectly.
Quote from: Orange Creamsicle on December 09, 2013, 07:36:47 PM
When people type defiantly instead of definitely and it totally changes the meaning of their sentence while still remaining a proper English sentence. I'm defiantly going to do it on purpose more often. Hehehe.
Lol.
My dad actually said something funny today. We walked past the cereal section and they have "Adult Cereal" and "Kid Cereal". He goes "Adult cereal? What, is there porno on the box?"
actually yesterday. I was crouching in front of a kid at my internschip because his jacketzip stuck and he decided to cuddle me (as he does often). but since I was crouching and he is a bit uncontrolled I fell over :D It was really funny to me (and other kids).
"<boy-name> those are the prettiest socks I've ever seen on any man, woman, or child"
Also the way it was said... trying to get under my skin - but it ended up just being hilarious :D
They were just gold toe ankle socks with a thin pinkish red ring around the cuff.
I guess I'll wear the lime green ones today. Maybe not the women's flats, though? (Yesterday... oversized men's shoes... today, probably sneakers)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi895.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fac158%2Fnapalmdeathfan13591%2FPortiaPassedOut.jpg&hash=549934ee84670426cc2e12aa80f42c1ab0a933e1)
This illustration from "The Get Along Gang & The Tattletale". It totally cracks me up. I had posted it once before but the resolution of the webcam was so bad that you could barely see the image. This one from a different device is much better.
Why isn't an orchiectomy just called a mister-ectomy? I think up silly things sometimes...
Department Store Santa: And what do you want, liitle boy?
My son: Umm.. You should know. I sent you a letter. ::)
Quote from: Jill F on December 14, 2013, 07:09:50 PM
Why isn't an orchiectomy just called a mister-ectomy? I think up silly things sometimes...
Not really silly, that's what it actually amounts to!
Why is it an orchidectomy. I think I got the wrong flower at birth!
Always liked orchids, though.
Quote from: Jill F on December 14, 2013, 07:09:50 PM
Why isn't an orchiectomy just called a mister-ectomy? I think up silly things sometimes...
Quote from: kabit on December 14, 2013, 07:48:37 PM
Why is it an orchidectomy. I think I got the wrong flower at birth!
Always liked orchids, though.
Thanks for the laugh, ladies. I also think up some odd things. Telling people usually gets me some odd looks and some (a lot) alone time.
Quote from: LordKAT on December 14, 2013, 07:53:15 PM
Thanks for the laugh, ladies. I also think up some odd things. Telling people usually gets me some odd looks and some (a lot) alone time.
I looked it up... and it's going in the TIL thread.
Orchids are named after testicles because of the shape of the root.
Quote from: Orange Creamsicle on December 11, 2013, 11:59:20 AM
When people use uncommon or obscure words to sound smart, but use them incorrectly.
Stop being prosaic! It makes you seem distended and fills me with rancor. :-\
Quote from: EstroGwynne on December 15, 2013, 12:02:10 AM
Stop being prosaic! It makes you seem distended and fills me rancor. :-\
I love LAMP!
Went to visit my 92 yr old mother in law, I walked in and she was on the phone (to my non-accepting SIL, her daughter). Her following conversation 'Oh Cindy is here' pause, 'Cindy Surname' pause, 'your sister in law'. Puts phone down with a thump.
We then spent a very nice few hours talking about her teaching career.
I was explaining to my Grandma Rose about terms in the queer community and we talked about "Metro" men.
So we ran into my friend Mario, a very polished and flirty guy, and they hit it off right away.
As he walked away she whispers into my ear "Is he one of those urbans?!" She mixed up "urban" and "metro". I just died. :icon_evil_laugh:
Kabit posts. For some reason, I like that rabbit.
Quote from: EstroGwynne on December 15, 2013, 12:02:10 AM
Stop being prosaic! It makes you seem distended and fills me with rancor. :-\
That quintessentially epitomizes the exemplification of the anathema that makes me cachinnate....or something like that.
Quote from: LordKAT on December 18, 2013, 12:41:02 AM
Kabit posts. For some reason, I like that rabbit.
Awww
♥! And I even know it's not because you want to eat me ;)
If I ever have a RL pic for my avatar... need to get me some bunny ears!
(These ones (http://kittencream.com/LopEarBunny.html))
Quote from: Shaina on December 17, 2013, 10:15:38 PM
I was explaining to my Grandma Rose about terms in the queer community and we talked about "Metro" men.
So we ran into my friend Mario, a very polished and flirty guy, and they hit it off right away.
As he walked away she whispers into my ear "Is he one of those urbans?!" She mixed up "urban" and "metro". I just died. :icon_evil_laugh:
We older types are like that, hug your Grandma Rose, she's a gem!
Quote from: kabit on December 18, 2013, 03:41:43 AM
Awww ♥! And I even know it's not because you want to eat me ;)
If I ever have a RL pic for my avatar... need to get me some bunny ears!
(These ones (http://kittencream.com/LopEarBunny.html))
The ears would be cute. You are right, I don't eat rabbits, especially ones with a good diet and the personality that comes through in your posts.
Quote from: LordKAT on December 18, 2013, 11:56:34 AM
The ears would be cute. You are right, I don't eat rabbits, especially ones with a good diet and the personality that comes through in your posts.
I love you, too KAT... you're one Kitty I'm not allergic to!
And you'd be horrified at my diet this month :( I have big plans to re-fix it after Christmas. I may need to start immediately (Holiday party at work today :P feel sick)
Again
♥!!
Quote from: Cindy on December 15, 2013, 01:06:11 AM
Went to visit my 92 yr old mother in law, I walked in and she was on the phone (to my non-accepting SIL, her daughter). Her following conversation 'Oh Cindy is here' pause, 'Cindy Surname' pause, 'your sister in law'. Puts phone down with a thump.
We then spent a very nice few hours talking about her teaching career.
Wow...that's cool. Right on!
Quote from: Shaina on December 17, 2013, 10:15:38 PM
I was explaining to my Grandma Rose about terms in the queer community and we talked about "Metro" men.
So we ran into my friend Mario, a very polished and flirty guy, and they hit it off right away.
As he walked away she whispers into my ear "Is he one of those urbans?!" She mixed up "urban" and "metro". I just died.
That IS pretty funny!
Quote from: LordKAT on December 18, 2013, 12:41:02 AM
Kabit posts. For some reason, I like that rabbit.
Yeah, she's pretty cool. Rabbits are tasty with the right BBQ sauce. ;)
"endless blather" :laugh:
Quote from: Miss_Bungle1991 on December 18, 2013, 01:52:38 PM
Yeah, she's pretty cool. Rabbits are tasty with the right BBQ sauce. ;)
You've seen the cartoons. You should know: the rabbit ALWAYS wins!
(edit: except in a foot race)
Quote from: kabit on December 18, 2013, 05:12:21 PM
You've seen the cartoons. You should know: the rabbit ALWAYS wins!
(edit: except in a foot race)
What if the turtle were carrying a rabbit's foot for luck, would it technically be a tie then?
Well... if the blather is about cartoons, then "blathering blatherskites!"
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on December 18, 2013, 03:08:45 PM
"endless blather" :laugh:
Right on :) You never know where you will find your own individual expertise
Quote from: V M on December 18, 2013, 10:37:51 PM
Right on :) You never know where you will find your own individual expertise
I'm only expert at having no expertise.
My hairdresser.
She (who met me when I was a guy transitioning) 'What are your plans for next year?
Me "I hope to have sex change surgery" (I was keeping it simple)
She 'So you want to be a guy?'
Me "No I want to be a complete woman"
She 'You already are Beautiful, you already are'
Mmmm
With a friend and her 4 year old daughter in a shopping center. She is very frightened of Father Christmas as we walked past the area her Mum says 'Do you want to see Father Christmas and tell him what you want for Christmas?' You could almost her her brain in action. She stops, turns around to face Father Christmas and shouts 'I want a bike' turns back and continues walking with us, mission accomplished and she didn't have to meet him.
:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
It never gets old when I see that Psychology 310 (the psychology and biology of human sexuality) is taught by Dr. S. Breedlove.
Quote from: Willow on December 22, 2013, 10:55:51 PM
It never gets old when I see that Psychology 310 (the psychology and biology of human sexuality) is taught by Dr. S. Breedlove.
I grew up just outside Middlesex County with a neighbour named Dick Loveless.
Quote from: big head horsey-face on December 18, 2013, 05:14:56 PM
What if the turtle were carrying a rabbit's foot for luck, would it technically be a tie then?
If the tortoise has the rabbit's foot, than the rabbit would likely hop around in circles.
Which reminds me:
"Mommy, mommy! Why do I always run in circles?"
"Shut up, Johnny, or I'll nail your other foot to the floor." >:-)
Quote from: GeWnYnNyNwEg on December 22, 2013, 11:03:34 PMI grew up just outside Middlesex County with a neighbour named Dick Loveless.
I lived in Middlesex County for 2 years 8)
Quote from: Cindy on December 20, 2013, 02:08:59 AM
With a friend and her 4 year old daughter in a shopping center. She is very frightened of Father Christmas as we walked past the area her Mum says 'Do you want to see Father Christmas and tell him what you want for Christmas?' You could almost her her brain in action. She stops, turns around to face Father Christmas and shouts 'I want a bike' turns back and continues walking with us, mission accomplished and she didn't have to meet him.
:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
That is HILARIOUS and so cute!
I told my mom that someone else gave me a lot of money on GTA V: Online and I said I could buy a tank (told her this yesterday as the same thing happened to me then too) and she said that I wasn't going to buy anything. I laughed because it's true and she knows how cheap I am.
Well, actually, I just kinda happily giggled to myself...
I was watching the game show 'Wheel of Fortune' and the answer to one of the puzzles was "Unbelievable Transformation" :) Made me feel good
Yay Wheel of Fortune! Did you guess it?
[Announcer voice] Then you win these fabulous prizes!!!!!! A lifetime supply of Knurlmann's Noodles. A three piece lawn sprinkler decorating kit. And this brand new zero miles............. salad fork! [/voice]
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on December 24, 2013, 09:09:28 PM
[Announcer voice] Then you win these fabulous prizes!!!!!! A lifetime supply of Knurlmann's Noodles. A three piece lawn sprinkler decorating kit. And this brand new zero miles............. salad fork! [/voice]
a good present for Kabit.
Quote from: GeWnYnNyNwEg on December 24, 2013, 11:20:46 PM
a good present for Kabit.
Something I'll need again starting.... tomorrow!
Oh! And this is something I was shown Monday:
http://goodnightdune.com/
Quote from: KabitTarah on December 25, 2013, 03:12:31 AM
Something I'll need again starting.... tomorrow!
Christmas in Rhode Island comes a day late this year :P
So while I was playing GTA V: Online, I ended up in a last team standing match where you only get one life. It was me against two guys and they both had a mic and were doing some slight trash talking. One of them was rank 4 and I had a feeling the other guy was of a low rank so I knew I had the advantage on them, just on weaponry alone. I just waited for both of them to come to me (rookie move). They were driving towards me and I snipped the driver in the head and he died instantly and I blew up the car they were in so the other dude died and I got an award fpr "scooping out". When they realized I had won, one of the guys trying to figure out how was that possible when it was two against one. The other guy was cussing me out lol.
In a previous incident one guy decided to follow me around in his car and I told him to back off, but he wouldn't listen so I finally got a tank and when he saw that, he got out of the car and backed off by leaving the game lol. I didn't even have to fire a missle.
You don't mess with the Malachite.
A Swarovski crystal bog brush,a bargain for £108!
Quote from: big kim on December 28, 2013, 03:47:14 AM
A Swarovski crystal bog brush,a bargain for £108!
I bought a bog brush recently and it had instructions - easy to use. I asked the cashier if that meant a man could use it.
Bog brush? I don't even know what that is much less how to use it. can't be too necessary.
The thought of a toilet brush with crystals makes me a bit giddy as well
Quote from: V M on December 28, 2013, 05:49:17 AM
The thought of a toilet brush with crystals makes me a bit giddy as well
Bog Brush? Well I suppose it's all a matter of semantics as to how it's perceived! :D
What is it really?
Apparently a toilet brush, obviously a term from another place/era.
Bog brush,an English expression for toilet brush,also a hairstyle seen on punks
Quote from: big kim on December 28, 2013, 11:00:44 AM
Bog brush,an English expression for toilet brush,also a hairstyle seen on punks
Thanks for the clarification! I always try and stay out of bogs as much as possible, though it seemed that I was given the dubious chore as bogmaster when my S.O. gave birth to the second male child. ;D
In the shower... I was grabbing the shaving gel, and knocked my facial scrub off the ledge with my elbow, but caught it... which made me lose the shaving gel, and caught that. Putting the gel back, a small mirror fell... caught that too!
I couldn't stop giggling. :D first [E]xperience?
Quote from: KabitTarah on December 29, 2013, 07:55:42 AM
In the shower... I was grabbing the shaving gel, and knocked my facial scrub off the ledge with my elbow, but caught it... which made me lose the shaving gel, and caught that. Putting the gel back, a small mirror fell... caught that too!
I couldn't stop giggling. :D first [E]xperience?
Good thing you caught the mirror. That would totally suck to be in the shower and dealing with broken glass.
Quote from: Laura Squirrel on December 29, 2013, 11:40:27 AM
Good thing you caught the mirror. That would totally suck to be in the shower and dealing with broken glass.
It's a plastic mirror... shower safe.
Discovering that Sherry Lynn did a cameo in the TaleSpin episode "On a Wing and a Bear". It is in the scene where Baloo comes across Ralph Throgmorton's granddaughter when he has a temp job as a carnie. When the girl began to speak, I thought to myself: 'Hey! That sounds like a younger version of Sasami" I looked up the credits for the episode and wouldn't ya know? It WAS her that did that voice! Not a total shock since she has done a lot of work with Disney but it's interesting since this is yet another thing I missed out on the first time I saw the episode back in the day.
Quote from: Laura Squirrel on January 01, 2014, 06:20:28 PM
Discovering that Sherry Lynn did a cameo in the TaleSpin episode "On a Wing and a Bear". It is in the scene where Baloo comes across Ralph Throgmorton's granddaughter when he has a temp job as a carnie. When the girl began to speak, I thought to myself: 'Hey! That sounds like a younger version of Sasami" I looked up the credits for the episode and wouldn't ya know? It WAS her that did that voice! Not a total shock since she has done a lot of work with Disney but it's interesting since this is yet another thing I missed out on the first time I saw the episode back in the day.
I love watching old episodes and discovering new details I never noticed notice before.
(https://scontent-a-ord.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-prn2/1558599_425724550895067_25744220_n.jpg)
Quote from: LordKAT on January 01, 2014, 07:46:50 PM
(https://scontent-a-ord.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-prn2/1558599_425724550895067_25744220_n.jpg)
Get em toughie!
I think the snail is winning that staring match.
Quote from: LordKAT on January 01, 2014, 09:44:15 PM
I think the snail is winning that staring match.
The snail shall always be victorious!!
Quote from: Laura Squirrel on January 02, 2014, 01:23:18 AM
The snail shall always be victorious!!
Slow and steady > fast and yippy.
Quote from: LordKAT on January 01, 2014, 07:46:50 PM
(https://scontent-a-ord.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-prn2/1558599_425724550895067_25744220_n.jpg)
No wonder that dog is upset. That had to hurt coming out! *giggle* ;D
You obviously didn't see the second photo of the dog running away in terror. NO ONE can defeat the snail!
Quote from: Jessica Merriman on January 02, 2014, 11:47:34 PM
No wonder that dog is upset. That had to hurt coming out! *giggle* ;D
Now that response got me laughing.
Had one small thing make me laugh today, heard that there is a rumour I'm on hormones apparently! Couldn't help but laugh and respond with "I wish!" Honestly, it was nice to know that people at least believed I might have been!
My son and I are writing an old-school text adventure game.
We created a lion to roam around the map. While setting attributes for the game object, we came to the gender attribute. My son confidently declared "The lion identifies neither male nor female. The lion identifies hungry." ;D
Quote from: Gwynne on January 03, 2014, 09:27:35 PM
"The lion identifies neither male nor female. The lion identifies hungry." ;D
That is so cute! I hope he got ice cream or something for that. :laugh:
Quote from: Jessica Merriman on January 03, 2014, 10:24:08 PM
That is so cute! I hope he got ice cream or something for that. :laugh:
He got a box of bakery cookies. :D
http://abcnews.go.com/Health/wireStory/cheesy-shortage-kraft-velveeta-running-low-21451803
This beyond stupid non-story. OH NO!! Low supplies of some crappy "cheese product". Velveeta sucks. That stuff is garbage.
doing a stupid Pete Townshend impression while playing my guitar.
Quote from: Laura Squirrel on January 07, 2014, 02:17:26 PM
http://abcnews.go.com/Health/wireStory/cheesy-shortage-kraft-velveeta-running-low-21451803
This beyond stupid non-story. OH NO!! Low supplies of some crappy "cheese product". Velveeta sucks. That stuff is garbage.
It makes quick dip for those 'forgot to bring a dish' times. other than that, I agree, it is not cheese.
Quote from: Zóôt Threepwood on January 18, 2014, 07:45:54 PM
doing a stupid Pete Townshend impression while playing my guitar.
Did you throw your guitar while it was feeding back? :D
O.T.: I was writing a scene in my latest fanfic. In the scene, Kathy's phone rings because Portia is calling her. I had written 'Kathy's phone rang from her purse' and then, my actual phone rang. I just thought it was amusing. It was my mom. (She's one of the very few people that call me.) Just the usual small talk is all.
Now...back to the fic.
I went out to my mom's other house that she has out of town last night. I decided to bring along Portia since I can't sleep without a doll anymore. :D Normally I sleep with Doris & Patricia but I decided to bring her along instead. When I mentioned that to my mom, she asks me: "How old are you?". Without missing a beat I replied: "I don't know...10..maybe 12." :D :D
Quote from: Laura Squirrel on January 20, 2014, 07:32:11 PM
I went out to my mom's other house that she has out of town last night. I decided to bring along Portia since I can't sleep without a doll anymore. :D Normally I sleep with Doris & Patricia but I decided to bring her along instead. When I mentioned that to my mom, she asks me: "How old are you?". Without missing a beat I replied: "I don't know...10..maybe 12." :D :D
das ok ute ;D
I tried out Cleverbot. This is what happened.
Me: What are you?
CB: What do you think I am?
Me: A robot?
CB: I didn't mean robot, I meant gender. What do you think I am?
Me: Female?
CB: Wrong. What is your gender?
Me: Male.
CB: Then no.
Me: No to what?
CB: To you.
LOL. If you're a guy no one wants to talk to you online. If you'r a girl they want to talk but only if there is boobs involved. I see how it is.
It just occurred to me ...
Sweathogs!
Brainless losers that attempt to spam forums. The admin for a small time noise forum that I belong to made me a Mod so I can take down the trolls. THEY WILL RECEIVE NO MERCY FROM MY BANHAMMER!!
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fdev.bukkit.org%2Fmedia%2Fimages%2F33%2F412%2Fbanhammer.png&hash=7c7e48402665ee692dbd06bb07f4eca6902fc60f)
Wield it well! I will sign up and say something rude, so you can make an example out of me. That will put fear into their hearts!
I never knew this, but Robbie Lee, the person that voiced Zipper Cat on the Get Along Gang, is a woman. :D I had no idea until I started looking around at sites about the Get Along Gang and reading up on the rest of the cast. (Ya know...those OTHER than Sherry Lynn. :D) But it's really funny to find this out and think about her doing the voice of this alpha male, jock type of character. Especially in the "Camp Get Along" episode where he's constantly going on about how "camping isn't for girls". Meanwhile, he (and the other boys) completely screw everything up. :D
The scene with the vet & the tortoise from The League of Gentlemen
Quote from: big kim on February 04, 2014, 05:12:52 AM
The scene with the vet & the tortoise from The League of Gentlemen
Yeah, that's a great scene. That entire series was awesome.
I have terrible reflexes normally, but my brother reached over and I thought he was going to take my Oreo. So I smacked his hand so fast lolol. And he goes "what??" And I said "I thought you were going to take my cookie." Apparently cookies are enough to drive me to superhuman heights.
My friend called me a sexually repressed weirdo.
More of the submissions from the Lays company invite for the internet to create new flavors. I'm not sure what they were thinking when they opened the gates on that one. XD
Quote from: Felix on February 06, 2014, 05:43:03 AM
More of the submissions from the Lays company invite for the internet to create new flavors. I'm not sure what they were thinking when they opened the gates on that one. XD
I suggest sodium nitrate, butylated hydroxytoluene, and monosodium glutamate flavour.
Quote from: Qwynne on February 06, 2014, 07:20:17 AM
I suggest sodium nitrate, butylated hydroxytoluene, and monosodium glutamate flavour.
:D :D
I would suggest Tequila, Peppermint Schnapps & Bourbon flavors.
Watching a documentary and someone says "I watched him struggle with being a vegetarian his whole life." Lmao. I shouldn't laugh because the guy died of cancer, but it's just funny that being a vegetarian is considered a struggle for some people. Tsk tsk, those alternative lifestyles always catch up with you in the end.
Quote from: birkin on February 06, 2014, 06:27:21 PM
Watching a documentary and someone says "I watched him struggle with being a vegetarian his whole life." Lmao. I shouldn't laugh because the guy died of cancer, but it's just funny that being a vegetarian is considered a struggle for some people. Tsk tsk, those alternative lifestyles always catch up with you in the end.
Translation: We might die early for being trans?
Quote from: Shantel on February 06, 2014, 08:06:58 PM
Translation: We might die early for being trans?
Yep, and if you're a transgender vegetarian, you'll die before you are even conceived. :o
Quote from: birkin on February 07, 2014, 03:47:19 PM
Yep, and if you're a transgender vegetarian, you'll die before you are even conceived. :o
Hey! I'm an angel KAT!!!
My sister randomly stopped by unannounced per usual and she had a guy friend with her
I'm not out to her and hadn't seen her in quite awhile so I put a coat on to hide the girls and invited them in
We were having a good visit but then her guy friend suddenly said he didn't feel well and wanted to go wait out in the car
I thought that confusing as he seemed okay but suddenly looked white as a ghost
So after visiting a bit more then saying our goodbyes my sister left
I had noticed that the visit had taken an odd turn and that my sister was a bit snickery, but I wasn't sure why
Well, upon returning to my computer I realized that I'd forgotten to take down a framed picture from the wall that might be a bit inappropriate for a rather religious couple to view
At first I thought "Uh oh, I'm busted" but then I about laughed my butt off and still laugh whenever I think about it >:-)
This photo of Israeli PM and Germany's Angela Merkal (SP?)... :D
(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BhUvh_jCAAEs1aS.jpg)
Quote from: Nikko on February 25, 2014, 09:13:19 AM
This photo of Israeli PM and Germany's Angela Merkal (SP?)... :D
Devilishly non-pc humorous though! >:-)
Food snobs, well snobby people in general :D Always makes me think of Jordache jeans for some reason
Today I was having my weekly electrolysis performed on me. My electrologists is also transgender and she normally has a spanish radio station on (she is practicing her Spanish as she plans to retire in Buenos Aires.) Anyway, she had talk radio on and I couldn't believe she was listing to Rush Limbaugh. She respond that it was her new homeopathic anesthesia for electrologists. It worked by making the patient (myself) so upset to hear what he says that you forget about the pain from having your face zapped. The really funny thing was, "it worked", LOL
Don't you hate it when this happens to your very favorite, broken in, pair of jeans? :P
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Ffatgirlinskinnyjeans.files.wordpress.com%2F2013%2F06%2Fsplit-jeans.jpg&hash=46e82a3683e0ffb3d0ceb11d0ba830df8e9476a6)
I blew out a pair working under the kitchen sink. They were like old friends.
Messing around with Google Flights, I have found something very lulzy.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FpOLScII.png&hash=6d9cb2fa79bb45e7b3604ebe4cfe3b3ba34f0957)
Maybe I'm missing something. What's the funny part?
Quote from: Caysee Danielle on February 27, 2014, 12:25:41 PMMaybe I'm missing something. What's the funny part?
Not only is it proposing that I could book a flight from the US to North Korea (which you cannot,) check above the price.
Quote from: Willow on February 27, 2014, 12:58:24 PM
Not only is it proposing that I could book a flight from the US to North Korea (which you cannot,) check above the price.
LOL.
I can think of a lot of places I'd like to go before North Korea. Lol.
Quote from: birkin on February 27, 2014, 02:18:30 PMI can think of a lot of places I'd like to go before North Korea. Lol.
Google must not know that North Korea is a totalitarian state devoid of practically every freedom, it asked me to have fun in Pyongyang!
I'm working on another fanfic. In this one, It is Kathy Cat's birthday. In this little exchange between her and Laura Squirrel, they are talking about Portia Porcupine and her bouts of forgetfulness that she has been experiencing throughout the day.
Laura: "She has been so flighty today. I don't know what her problem is."
Kathy: "Maybe we should check her scalp for blonde roots"
:D :D
Quote from: Willow on February 27, 2014, 12:58:24 PM
Not only is it proposing that I could book a flight from the US to North Korea (which you cannot,) check above the price.
Probably includes the extortion money you'll need to be released from that hell hole. But have fun yo.
Quote from: Nikko on March 01, 2014, 01:30:56 AMProbably includes the extortion money you'll need to be released from that hell hole. But have fun yo.
I'd prefer Tehran myself.
Quote from: Willow on March 01, 2014, 04:33:35 AM
I'd prefer Tehran myself.
Tehran? Nah. Go to Persepolis!
Chase did a video with his reaction to watching that video with Arielle Scarcella and Ryan Cassata. I have a whole new level of respect for him, lol, it was a really great reaction.
The endless string of U-Hauls at the house across the street from me. I feel horrible, but I can't help but chuckle.
Our esteemed county commissioner calling me an a-hole yesterday. I was messing with him after he pumped some gas and I had him thinking he had accidentally pumped twice what he actually did and he was worried for a couple minutes, the look on his face was priceless, lol. Then I laughed when he was just about to go back out to the pump and look for himself and so he told me I was an a-hole, but that he loves me anyway. He's still one of the few republicans in our area that I vote for.
Good one, Jaime ;)
(https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/8094992128/h7C01FB32/)
I went on Xbox to play RE5 and forgot to turn off the "join game" setting. So some little kid (like, 10 or less) joins my game, and all I hear is "I'm not in my naaaaatuuure" and I'm thinking "I know that line, but from where??" Then he goes "Drinking out the bottle, I got no respect."
Then I realized and had to bite my lip LOL. Cause I am 99% sure he was being entirely serious and thought he was being cool.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bbEoRnaOIbs
Quote from: birkin on March 11, 2014, 04:24:29 PM
I went on Xbox to play RE5 and forgot to turn off the "join game" setting. So some little kid (like, 10 or less) joins my game, and all I hear is "I'm not in my naaaaatuuure" and I'm thinking "I know that line, but from where??" Then he goes "Drinking out the bottle, I got no respect."
Then I realized and had to bite my lip LOL. Cause I am 99% sure he was being entirely serious and thought he was being cool.
kids these days...
I was watching a video by Shane Dawson with him playing Wizard 101, and it asked whether he was a boy or a girl during registration and he was like "Why is this a question? This is 2014; you don't know when someone is transitioning!"
It just made me laugh so hard.
Finally got around to watching last Wednesday's Psych.
These lines:
"Lassie: I'm going to need you to turn it up to a 15.
Shawn: No can do; any jackassery over a 12 and Gus breaks into Reese's Pieces."
Watching Metallica's "Some Kind Of Monster" and treating it like an episode of "Mystery Science Theater 3000".
Watching a video where a British commentator calls an American football game.
Along the lines with Calder.
I watched the top ten failed NHL penalty shots and the number one fail by Dennis Wideman was just hilarious!
http://youtu.be/XkkOVpXegS8 (http://youtu.be/XkkOVpXegS8)
I'm on this yard sell Facebook group and one prson takes a picture of a dress with someone wearing it and in the description it says "never worn". One of the commenters asked how can it never be worn if she's wearing it in the picture and the person replies "she put it on to take the picture."
Some people are idiots.
Reading Malachite's reply.
I've been listening to various Hardcore/Punk bands on Spotify all day. (Germs, Negative FX, Die Kreuzen, GG Allin, Slapshot, Negative Approach) They tend to recycle the same commercials during the breaks. There is one commercial in particular, I think it is for a school or something, where this little girl says "can we do that again?" and I SWEAR it sounds like what Portia Porcupine would have sounded like had she been voiced by an actual little girl rather than an adult. It cracks me up every time that I hear it.
The "Bad-jokes" thread here on this forum.
This has been way too amusing today. (https://24.media.tumblr.com/1c0072ab9cf1e2d4a2b658079d2653ea/tumblr_mrq7ov0bz11sq38yao1_400.gif)
The phrase "you ought not".
Watching A LOT of "How It Should Have Ended"
I was listening to a general knowledge quiz on the radio this morning, and one of the questions was: "Which musical features characters named Riff Raff, Brad, Janet and Frank-N-Furter?".
The contestant answered... 'Grease'.
Somebody needs to make that happen. That's a mash-up I would totally go to see. ;D
Thinking of when I read my will to my friend. She think's it's more of a sermon than an actual will. :D
Keep having this going through my head. Was really annoying during my psych test, almost as annoying as my ScanTron OCD.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_cG7ZVBXQII&list=LLgXkZ3u5CKaUdZTCaje0OTg&index=6
Youtube Poop. Yes, I'm a bit immature.
Josmar. I couldn't stop laughing when I watched these!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UTbn4Oyw0nw
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=slozkc8sjW8
I was hanging out, listening to Gwar and singing along at pretty much the same volume as the stereo. :D I heard a knock on the door so I turned the stereo down.
It was the cops. They said 'hello' and I replied: "Hi! How are you?" and I swear..the voice that came out of my mouth was like a mixture of friggin Sasami Masaki Jurai and Portia Porcupine. :D :D
Apparently, they weren't there because of my loud volume. They were asking about my neighbors and a certain car of their's. I don't associate with the neighbors other than a random "hello" and that's about it. So, I told them I had no idea about that and that they had a lot of visitors so it could be anyone's car.
But that voice... :D :D
Quote from: Lauren5 on March 26, 2014, 12:49:34 PM
Keep having this going through my head. Was really annoying during my psych test, almost as annoying as my ScanTron OCD.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_cG7ZVBXQII&list=LLgXkZ3u5CKaUdZTCaje0OTg&index=6
This gets stuck in my head SO often. It's brutal lol. But it's such a good parody.
"The problem with Samsonite luggage is that it falls apart as soon as you cut the tags off"
This Mitchell and Webb sketch:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0VxgUc_v2Zs.
This joke on my local radio station:
Q: How many Chinese Whispers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: Steven.
Listening to a GG Allin live show from 1987 at The Rocket in Providence, R.I. The band only knows 5 songs but they stay on stage for just over an hour while GG rambles like an idiot. It's so ridiculous but it's so hilarious in how absurd it all is.
Standing in a store check out line the woman behind me saying "Look at that girl trying to be a boy. Why cant they be normal like us"? :laugh:
This song has been popping in and out of my head for days now.
Makes me giggle every time I think about it.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tyn22cdYSDI
The Onion often gets a laugh out of me.
Biologists Confirm God Evolved From Chimpanzee Deity (http://www.theonion.com/articles/biologists-confirm-god-evolved-from-chimpanzee-dei,35755/)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FfLGIntq.jpg&hash=85da9dce55417edbf850e9efffdf0decdd4997a3)
I'm currently watching Hellsing Abridged. It's a fantastic web series by Team Four Star that parodies Hellsing Ultimate. TFS also do Dragonball Z Abridged. I urge everyone to check them out.
Quote from: Kimberley Beauregard on April 10, 2014, 07:57:40 PM
I'm currently watching Hellsing Abridged. It's a fantastic web series by Team Four Star that parodies Hellsing Ultimate. TFS also do Dragonball Z Abridged. I urge everyone to check them out.
Oh my god I love team four star.
" Hey Vegeta."
" Hey Vegeta."
" Hey Vegeta."
" Shut up Napa!!!!"
Yeah, Nappa is hilarious. I have to admit though, Guru and Frieza are my favourites.
my friend's dog wiggling around on his back. he's old and normally sort of dignified
More Youtube poop.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FCACnyRg.png&hash=94ab70f23ac9ee58f2a1ba94000756f2db149607)
Thinking about when my sister said "Peta" bear instead of "Pedo" bear lol!
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fp.fod4.com%2Fupload%2Faff3567c9abaad4b798a350dc1e1b1a3%2FoGM4fjYTyO3NTJTU1kvn_Musical%2520Chairs%2520Brawl.gif&hash=52ceaf35c7fb8daa5abab668b1e601b8047fdbf2)
Playing with our puppies!
I don't know why, but my mom asked me today "so...since you spent those years living as female and women live longer than men, will you have an extra long life span?" It's not a really silly question but it was random anyway and I laughed.
Quote from: Malachite on April 12, 2014, 09:12:13 PM
Thinking about when my sister said "Peta" bear instead of "Pedo" bear lol!
Well, to be fair, vegetarians are almost as evil as pedophiles.
KIDDING!! :angel:
Quote from: birkin on April 13, 2014, 08:40:53 PM
I don't know why, but my mom asked me today "so...since you spent those years living as female and women live longer than men, will you have an extra long life span?" It's not a really silly question but it was random anyway and I laughed.
Hmm. For a guy, maybe. Then again, I'm not completely sure the data supports the idea that men are actually biologically disposed toward earlier deaths. Men definitely die earlier on average from wars, taking more dangerous jobs, not getting on the lifeboats until all the women and children have, getting endlessly nagged by their wives (kidding!) etc. I'm not sure how well the studies accounted for all of that.
I'm going to have to make some sort of "kidding" smiley that's more obvious than the winky face one. :D
After having dinner over at my neighbor's house, we were watching Long Island Medium and he was wondering if the spirits from the graveyard next to his house were watching him jerk off at night. I told him that see, he's just like a heterosexual, resorting to that while not with his hubby.
I figured it was time for me to come home after that, lol.
I love Basic Instructions. It offers legitimate advice while making the reader laugh. This is one of my favourite comics because of the third panel alone.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fbasicinstructions.net%2Fstorage%2F2013-01-08-emotions.gif%3F__SQUARESPACE_CACHEVERSION%3D1357684375875&hash=ce1d5e869aadfcb2af81397fcd986e91ff066b94)
Being called Darth Sparks
My father called and asked me to look uo "more fish in the sea" online. I'm thinking "what????" I asked if he wanted to know about more fish in an actual sea or is it a website. He said a guy told him about this dating website. I told him you mean Plenty of Fish? He said yeah, lol.
Quote from: dalebert on April 14, 2014, 11:35:27 AM
Hmm. For a guy, maybe. Then again, I'm not completely sure the data supports the idea that men are actually biologically disposed toward earlier deaths. Men definitely die earlier on average from wars, taking more dangerous jobs, not getting on the lifeboats until all the women and children have, getting endlessly nagged by their wives (kidding!) etc. I'm not sure how well the studies accounted for all of that.
I'm going to have to make some sort of "kidding" smiley that's more obvious than the winky face one. :D
Yeah, not so sure about that either...I think it's too complicated to know for sure, but I don't really worry about it. I stress over so much, I'd probably run myself to an early grave worrying about if I'll live 3-5 extra years.
Quote from: piglet smith on April 14, 2014, 06:25:00 PM
After having dinner over at my neighbor's house, we were watching Long Island Medium and he was wondering if the spirits from the graveyard next to his house were watching him jerk off at night. I told him that see, he's just like a heterosexual, resorting to that while not with his hubby.
I figured it was time for me to come home after that, lol.
Haha omg.
Quote from: Kimberley Beauregard on April 15, 2014, 12:51:11 AM
I love Basic Instructions. It offers legitimate advice while making the reader laugh. This is one of my favourite comics because of the third panel alone.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fbasicinstructions.net%2Fstorage%2F2013-01-08-emotions.gif%3F__SQUARESPACE_CACHEVERSION%3D1357684375875&hash=ce1d5e869aadfcb2af81397fcd986e91ff066b94)
That's basically how I feel about my emotions. I find it therapeutic when I deliberately address them, on my own terms, but when they come along unwelcome and I try to talk or think about them, it usually gets out of control and does me more harm than good. :(
I was eating a tuna fish sandwich and my brother comes in, takes on sniff, and goes "....oh God. You smell like mom."
Nina Conti Live at the Apollo: http://youtu.be/vVI_4QXjmQM
I haven't laughed so much for ages. Skip to 4 mins if you want to get straight into it
Thinking of the other day when I was at the park with my niece, nephew, and sister. The kids were feeding ducks fries and when one of them threw a fry into the pond, a duck was going to get it, but as soon as he got close enough, a fish ate it instead. It was funny, but poor duck.
Quote from: Malachite on April 26, 2014, 05:38:41 PM
Thinking of the other day when I was at the park with my niece, nephew, and sister. The kids were feeding ducks fries and when one of them threw a fry into the pond, a duck was going to get it, but as soon as he got close enough, a fish ate it instead. It was funny, but poor duck.
It could have been an Alligator Gar and the bread would still be there, though not the duck! >:-)
Quote from: birkin on April 25, 2014, 08:26:59 PM
I was eating a tuna fish sandwich and my brother comes in, takes on sniff, and goes "....oh God. You smell like mom."
:o
Oh my God!!
:D :D
Quote from: birkin on April 25, 2014, 08:26:59 PM
I was eating a tuna fish sandwich and my brother comes in, takes on sniff, and goes "....oh God. You smell like mom."
Your mom eats a lot of tuna! >:-)
Did you punch him out for that comment?
Quote from: Shantel on April 27, 2014, 01:52:21 PM
Your mom eats a lot of tuna! >:-)
Did you punch him out for that comment?
No, because it's true. :| She has a lot of problems with her "downstairs" LOL. I feel really sorry for her actually.
Quote from: birkin on April 27, 2014, 04:12:07 PM
No, because it's true. :| She has a lot of problems with her "downstairs" LOL. I feel really sorry for her actually.
Get her to an OB-GYN
Rather hokey stuff involving romance and other stuff I've noticed going on at my apt. complex and other places that I don't bother saying anything about :laugh:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u5LvUAhAtHw
hahaha how dumb is that? :D
Quote from: Shantel on April 27, 2014, 11:49:48 AM
It could have been an Alligator Gar and the bread would still be there, though not the duck! >:-)
LOL! :D
I was picking out a Mother Day's card and I came across a really good one. It made me giggle since what was written inside seemed to apply to the trans thing as it related to me growing up. (But that's just my interpretation of it)
I used to play dress up
clopping around in your shoes,
dreaming of who I'd be
when I was old enough
to wear lipstick and high heels
Now that I've grown
out of make-believe
and into real life, I see
that the smart woman
I wanted to be
was already a part of me
I've watched her poise,
felt her grace,
and known her love
every day of my life.
Mom, you're
the kind of woman
I aspire to be.
Haha yeah, if I read that card I'd immediately imagine a trans woman in her mother's closet LOL.
Quote from: birkin on May 01, 2014, 03:49:31 PM
Haha yeah, if I read that card I'd immediately imagine a trans woman in her mother's closet LOL.
Thankfully, I was skinny so I could fit into everything, so that was cool.
The inevitable getting busted later on? That wasn't so fun.
Oh well....that's life.
Murphy Brown
So I was wandering around a local shop at lunchtime, looking for the razor blades that I now need to keep my hairy face under control, when I heard a slow, ballady cover-version of a vaguely familiar song that was playing over the PA system.
I thought... "I know that song, but I can't remember what it's called". So I played the song forward in my head, got to a bit I could identify and I realised that I was listening to... The Crying Game.
Quote from: DianaVV on May 01, 2014, 06:31:26 PM
my dog sat on my lap, i scratched his back/tummy , he looked so happy .. & then i farted quietly .. and few sec later, he looked at me with not happy face & he jumped down & walked away without coming back no matter how loud i called him to come back haha ;D
My dog used to do that, his own terribly smelly farts were dandy to him, but let someone else do it and he'd walk off mad.
Quote from: FTMDiaries on May 02, 2014, 08:16:32 AM
So I was wandering around a local shop at lunchtime, looking for the razor blades that I now need to keep my hairy face under control, when I heard a slow, ballady cover-version of a vaguely familiar song that was playing over the PA system.
I thought... "I know that song, but I can't remember what it's called". So I played the song forward in my head, got to a bit I could identify and I realised that I was listening to... The Crying Game.
That was one of my most favorite movies!
Quote from: Shantel on May 02, 2014, 09:00:34 AM
That was one of my most favorite movies!
I enjoyed it too... it was very bittersweet. And I went through an awkward phase of wanting to watch
everything Jaye Davidson had ever done.
But it did give me a proper snort-laugh today when I heard the song playing whilst I happened to be in the shop. If they only knew... ;D
Quote from: FTMDiaries on May 02, 2014, 09:06:06 AM
I enjoyed it too... it was very bittersweet. And I went through an awkward phase of wanting to watch everything Jaye Davidson had ever done.
But it did give me a proper snort-laugh today when I heard the song playing whilst I happened to be in the shop. If they only knew... ;D
It was bittersweet. Two people from diversely opposite backgrounds and circumstances finding common ground through their mutually crushing loneliness as they begin to care for one another in spite of the stigma surrounding both. I wonder how many times that gets played out in this community?
I forgot about this song, lol, but it popped up my itunes and burst out laughing when he went "Mary Kate and Ashley used to be so wholesome, now they're getting older, they're starting to grow bum bums." God I bet so many celebrities hate him.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dm6hNnWYPP8
Q: Why do elephants paint their nuts red?
A: So they can hide in cherry trees.
Q: What's the loudest noise in the jungle?
A: A giraffe eating cherries.
We do have a 'Bad Jokes' thread ya know
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o6F66HNRN2A
haha so cute
Quote from: V M on May 07, 2014, 06:53:29 AM
We do have a 'Bad Jokes' thread ya know
I do apologize, slight mental relapse.
LOL, I help an elderly lady to lock up the apt. complex at night and we generally meet up in the lobby and chat a bit
We were talking about having strange dreams when one of the other tenants walks up and begins to accuse us of gossiping about her 'love-life'
Granted, she has given a twirl to just about any and every guy who comes along and we both tend to avoid her, but neither of us could give a care who she is going with each week or so
It was pretty easy to figure, the same person who went gossiping to her is the same one who gossips about her and everyone else
It's amazing how one person stirring the pot can brew up so much trouble
Anyway, we were both flabbergasted and couldn't help but laugh a bit
That of course pissed her off even more
Oh well...
I couldn't figure out how I put on 8 pounds in one day. I thought about all I ate and all the meds I'm missing and figured well, water weight due to swelling legs could be part of it. It still seemed off. I went home and got undressed. While taking off my ankle weights I realized something. I forgot to take them off before I stepped on the scale this time.
Somedays........
Quote from: LordKAT on May 08, 2014, 09:57:20 AM
I couldn't figure out how I put on 8 pounds in one day. I thought about all I ate and all the meds I'm missing and figured well, water weight due to swelling legs could be part of it. It still seemed off. I went home and got undressed. While taking off my ankle weights I realized something. I forgot to take them off before I stepped on the scale this time.
Somedays........
:D :D That's a good one.
my deposing lawyers made me laugh today :laugh:
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg0.joyreactor.com%2Fpics%2Fpost%2FDorkly-comics-thor-1094678.jpeg&hash=fb1ea089b93ea4a787311c17edaa9701ba4125c0)
So, we learned at work that we can get hold of a signed Adolf Hitler photo. A colleague sincerely asked us if we were going to punt it at a Help 4 Heroes event.
My sides hurt.
Actually been making me laugh for quite awhile - One of my neighbors still sports a mullet and thinks he's lookin' cool :D I wanted to tell him that the 70's called and wants their hairstyle back but I didn't want to be mean
Seeing a video of Take That performing Nirvana's Smells Like Teen Spirit.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6_ELGnmLJOs
Oh my stars and garters! Kill it with fire!!!
This has a lot of cursing so it's NSFW.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lf85ZaAfixM
We went into a mall to wait in the air conditioning until rush hour was mostly over, and visited the rock store before leaving. They had some stones that looked like what I remembered being advertised as "magic" rocks in the back of magazines when I was little. I commented on them and the salesperson tried to demonstrate their use, but what she actually did was just toss them up to both bounce off her face and roll away under the furniture. It was easy to join her and her associate in laughing at such an impressive display of grace.
Turns out the rocks are magnetic hematite and people like them for the clacking sound they make.
Apparently, new jeans + packer = a purple penis.
Even though I've washed them, the dye from my new jeans is wearing off through my underwear and has stained my brand-new Mr Limpy a fetching shade of purple. Nice!
I laughed out of pain when I slipped in the stairs at my psychologist.
This comment by user Scary Mike on 5 Ways to Win an Argument (That Will Ruin Your Relationship) (http://"http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-strategies-to-winning-arguments-that-are-always-wrong/#ixzz31p6C1AJP"):
"The key to winning an argument is to cover the other person in gasoline before the fighting actually starts. Now when they start complaining -often because being covered in gasoline severely upset them- you just need to light a match and they'll leave you alone. People hate being on fire, they hate it so bad."
i tripped over a pebble and a blade of grass! :D
A joke in the wrong thred. thanks to a mental relaps.
Buzzfeed has an article of 22 Problems Only Men Will Understand:
http://www.buzzfeed.com/justinabarca/man-problems-yo
One was: hair in all the wrong places. "Just what I needed, a permanent sweater." :laugh: I grow my hair in that place too, it sucks.
I was reading the comments section on one site (that I won't mention because it's full of idiots anyway. I just read the comments when I need a good laugh.) One person said that "kids were being peer pressured to socially engineer kids into ignoring their natural disgust toward homosexuality."
I couldn't stop laughing at such a stupid statement.
Since when is bigotry "natural"?
Wow...........
Spamalot. Oh god, that's funnier than the original movie :D
End of the shift at work tonight and one of the boys says to another one "do you want a lift home tonight" he replies with "do you have a car?" haha... not sure whether he was expecting a piggy back home or what but it made me laugh.
Exam time makes poor little students lose the plot they have all been coming out with VERY random things recently (me included).
I also nearly woke the whole street up by typing my pin number into my house alarm instead of the alarm code
murphy brown
Nothing
I keep watching in my head over and over the scene from Team America: World Police with Kim Jong Il and Hans Blix in it :D
The latest episode of Supernatural got a few laughs out of me.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fbasicinstructions.net%2Fstorage%2F2013-12-03-condorerun.gif%3F__SQUARESPACE_CACHEVERSION%3D1386108574173&hash=a503d136f98ecdf14275bda28a9c002af1e7f320)
This may be a little bit NSFW. Adult themes.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JUD7rmHartE
*snickers*
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fstatic.fjcdn.com%2Fpictures%2Falucard_c543f6_1960857.jpg&hash=9940945e09e8c941848c71bf48d37290b2003193)
I'm doing a thing for a friend who's a huge fan of Barry Manilow.
So I mention this to one of my colleagues, and she says "Oh yeah, Barry Manilow! I love that song of his..." and she starts singing: "Club Tropicana, drinks are freeeeeeeee!" ;D
Seeing a French bulldog chase a ball and trip up and do a hand stand when it caught it.I love dogs with squashed faces like Frenchies,Boston terriers and Pugs they always make me laugh
Quote from: big kim on May 22, 2014, 05:54:28 PM
Seeing a French bulldog chase a ball and trip up and do a hand stand when it caught it.I love dogs with squashed faces like Frenchies,Boston terriers and Pugs they always make me laugh
Hah, just saw one today and fell in love with it, they are just adorable!
The conversation I had with my friend the other day on FB
Her: "I wanna go home."
Me: "Me too"
Her: "Where are you?"
Me: "at my mom's house"
Her: "..isn't that your house too? Lol"
Me: "yes, but it isn't my home. My home is in Crystal Tokyo"
Her: "Oh get the ->-bleeped-<- outta here lmfao" (had to censor the f word somewhat)
Me: "LOLLLLLLLLL"
Her: "You should have seen the look on my face when I read that"
HAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA!
Malachite's dream. I have no idea why I find it funny though.
This video someone shared on FB, made me laugh. (Warning Language not safe for work!)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JYAq-7sOzXQ (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JYAq-7sOzXQ)
This made me laugh
www.youtube.com/watch?v=78g0SyQjU1s (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=78g0SyQjU1s)
Quote from: Jaime R D aka big head horsey-face on May 25, 2014, 10:55:44 AM
This made me laugh
You've too much time on your hands, better get to whacking those weeds now! :D
A little evil, but it had me in hysterics.
(https://lh5.googleusercontent.com/-s64ih1lX13Y/UadG-9W-U5I/AAAAAAAAJpA/2iS8EJLJkDw/w500/funny-animated-gifs-dog-lazer%2B%25281%2529.gif)
Seeing a trot race today with a horse named Bubbling Gypsy
Quote from: immortal gypsy on May 27, 2014, 04:48:43 AM
Seeing a trot race today with a horse named Bubbling Gypsy
Did you exchange some bubbly for immortality?
Professor Stephen Hawking.
The breakfast DJ on our local radio station was in Oxford a couple of years ago, attending an event at which Prof. Hawking was also present. As the DJ walked past Prof. Hawking the great man happened to burp... and his computer voice synthesiser said: "Oops! Pardon me!". ;D
Quote from: LordKAT on May 27, 2014, 08:37:38 AM
Did you exchange some bubbly for immortality?
Only temporarily. Thankfully my enemies didn't find out I was vulnerable
NSFW because it's Tom Waits and he cusses and stuff.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fbiioBFkD_Q
Seeing a councilor coming out of a rub and tug shop
Quote from: Felix on May 30, 2014, 12:42:16 AM
NSFW because it's Tom Waits and he cusses and stuff.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fbiioBFkD_Q
I really enjoyed that.
I was labeled a "Stalinist" for supporting equal rights for trans people. :D :D People...what are we gonna do with'em?! :D :D
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2Fy5GEzo1.jpg&hash=883767e2a4c74e9d2e7db7ef2cc09b7b69605e30)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FyVCwRHV.gif&hash=504c9cef55aeb2b10c7abd26fecbf917e0282a51)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FcJpvznM.gif&hash=26736a2e940555725277f863a28ab6dc8f2be196)
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the stats_canada twitter feed. I don't even know any canadians right now irl, but still.
https://twitter.com/stats_canada
Had a new rep in my office today, really cute guy. When he left all the woman descended on me like flies wanting to know who he was. A ten minute porn-fantasy conversation followed.
I think I'm working with a bunch of nymphos :laugh:
What is the collective for a group of nymphomaniacs?
I think you call them South Australians
I'll never tire of this image macro:
(https://c2.staticflickr.com/8/7127/7573185118_080dde00de_z.jpg)
Quote from: immortal gypsy on June 03, 2014, 04:40:38 AM
I think you call them South Australians
Oh I am aggrieved >:-)
Quote from: Cindy on June 03, 2014, 04:46:38 AM
Oh I am aggrieved >:-)
Couldn't help myself ;D. Free shot here I was born in Queensland
Quote from: immortal gypsy on June 03, 2014, 04:49:59 AM
Couldn't help myself ;D. Free shot here I was born in Queensland
I'm a very forgiving woman :laugh:
Quote from: Cindy on June 03, 2014, 04:53:04 AM
I'm a very forgiving woman :laugh:
Must be something in the water down there my uncle is the same way. I've been in Sydney to long they're much easier to bait >:-)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FtCU7J4J.jpg&hash=404bba349ff420943029bf184dba6c9ce253eea2)
Anyone heard of SCP? It's a wiki and each page has details on anomalous entities with supernatural effects. The page typically has details on special containment procedures, descriptions and experiment logs. Some of these pages are just downright creepy and more unnerving and horrific than some of the best creepypastas I've read.
But what stand out are the joke pages. Not all of them rely on in-jokes you'd only understand if you've read some of the highest rated pages. One joke page which comes to mind is this:
http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-006-j
Quote from: caseyyy on February 02, 2012, 06:58:19 AM
I never laugh at the way people say things, but one of my professors said "The Gaps" (referring to the store, The Gap) and I broke out into this like...half smile bordering on a laugh and fortunately it didn't become one. I don't know why it was that funny, actually.
That's because "The Gaps" have clothes in them,
The rest of us would like to keep our "Gaps" In clothes :p
But yes that thought made me Laugh today :)
Quote from: dalebert on June 03, 2014, 08:45:16 AM
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FtCU7J4J.jpg&hash=404bba349ff420943029bf184dba6c9ce253eea2)
lolol I love sassy children.
Today I had my latest T shot at the doctor's surgery... and whilst I was queueing up to sign in, there was an elderly couple at the receptionist's desk, booking their next medical appointment.
The wife had brought an actual calendar from home to write the appointment on. She must've taken it down off the wall to bring it with her to the doctor's surgery. It was one of those large display ones, with a different picture of puppies for each month.
Adorable. ;D
A quote from another site. Potentially offensive, but it was meant in sarcasm more than anything.
QuoteYou all are forgetting Dora the Explorer [...] I realized she was running illegal aliens from Mexico to Texas, she was always looking at her map and crossing rivers.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2F1H62VF7.jpg&hash=ae0bb0e881bf98070988d1365ae61b46ba2a8530)
Quote from: Kimberley Beauregard on June 04, 2014, 06:09:05 PM
Anyone heard of SCP? It's a wiki and each page has details on anomalous entities with supernatural effects. The page typically has details on special containment procedures, descriptions and experiment logs. Some of these pages are just downright creepy and more unnerving and horrific than some of the best creepypastas I've read.
But what stand out are the joke pages. Not all of them rely on in-jokes you'd only understand if you've read some of the highest rated pages. One joke page which comes to mind is this:
http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-006-j
I am familiar with SCP and that made me laugh.
The other thing today - my kid was talking about school and I kind of idly asked who on her bus was throwing shoes all the time, and how she stayed calm during that. She told me the kid's name, and said he's mostly nonverbal but that he's really smart. I can dig that, okay. People are different. But then she told me that when he gets upset all he can say is "waffles" because his favorite thing is a toy waffle. Omg that is so much better than what most of us say when we're angry. :laugh:
Build a Spitfire in 28 monthly magazines including parts £32 per magazine!I had a laugh however anyone from Yorkshire or Scotland will have tears in their eyes and would also need to be sat down.
Our dogs being crazy.
I went to buy a snack at the store I worked at years ago. The cashier (my old boss, who has no idea) goes "Hi birthname!" And I look at her and go "Hi bossname." Her face was PRICELESS. Her jaw literally dropped a little. I wonder if she saw my beard shadow or not.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FvZ339Nb.gif&hash=10cb88cb7a0debf87cd20867d08ec578a8741503)
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Have the "Hand of God" World Cup match on in the background. Discussing who we think will win the world cup someone pipes up.
"Oh I think WEST Germany have a good chance this year :P. (Someone just showed their age picking a country that dosen't exsist anymore. At least he did not ask what group U.S.S.R are in this world cup)
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Quote from: paula lesley on June 08, 2014, 05:30:27 PM
Watching the "IT Crowd" again ! Just love it ;D
It's one of my favourite sitcoms, alongside Peep Show. I also like The Thick Of It, but I haven't seen many episodes.
So a few days ago I lost my pass for work.
Bit annoyed as never lost on before.
Looked high and low and still could not find it... >:(
Today organised and got a new one so all set.
Got home today and went to the shop downstairs.
Bugger....
Typical :D
(https://i.imgur.com/KW2JnUn.jpg)
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Watching videos on liamkyleausllivan's YT channel makes me feel better.
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This was yesterday, but my co-worker asked me what I called the hairstyle I had my hair in him (braids).
An enterprising ice-cream van owner in my neighbourhood has changed his van's jingle to the theme tune from the famous British (football) TV show Match of the Day, presumably in honour of the World Cup. ;D
Quote from: Felix on June 14, 2014, 07:14:04 AM
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LOL in theory - but reality gives that joke a subtle hidden punchline that makes it even better, especially considering that this is a
very touchy subject in the UK.
The NHS does not treat foreign citizens for any long-term illnesses, so you'd have to pay in full or go back home, and your travel insurance would only pay to get you back home. So instead of ripping off the British taxpayer for some very expensive treatment, you'd pay for an expensive foreign holiday, expensive travel insurance, and you'd
still be liable for your own medical bills.
Now
that's what I call a punchline.
Orange is the New Black always makes me laugh so hard. They just come up with some of the craziest stuff sometimes, like this:
"Hey, you ever thinking about Jay-Z and Beyonce f*? Cause I do. Like more than I do myself even."
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2Fr2mz0bR.gif&hash=fbfc748e9e599e7e4b5b6fa1bd07dabc6bbf47c3)
George Carlin comedy clips from YouTube make my day.
Quote from: Marcel on June 16, 2014, 09:34:02 AM
George Carlin comedy clips from YouTube make my day.
George Carlin comedy clips from YouTube make
every day. ;D
Quote from: FTMDiaries on June 16, 2014, 10:26:31 AM
George Carlin comedy clips from YouTube make every day. ;D
For sure! ;)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OmJ2snsLxWw
This.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi1262.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fii610%2FTysilio%2Fsexydeepseadiver_zpscd30f4ff.jpg&hash=33e58b2f5353986322a2cb453da1305a2a00d3f6)
Quote from: Marcel on June 16, 2014, 09:34:02 AM
George Carlin comedy clips from YouTube make my day.
That's how I got turned on to George Carlin (but I'm only a fan of his 90's stuff onward). But, after a while, Youtube clips just didn't cut it. I had to get the DVD's of the shows.
O.T.: Annoying my mother since I had my headphones on, listening to various tunes (mostly Faith No More & Mr Bungle) on my MP3 player. She was constantly saying: "Hey!", and I would say "What?!".
:D
After a while, she just gave up.
This morning I had that thing where you're asleep but your bladder starts aching, so you start dreaming about trying to find a toilet to use. After having found a toilet in my dream but still being disturbed by the urge to go, I woke myself up properly and forced myself to go to the bathroom. After all, I didn't want any accidents.
A short while later I got to my car to start the long journey to work, and the radio came on when I started the engine. And guess what song was playing?
Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go. ;D
Quote from: FTMDiaries on June 17, 2014, 04:56:51 AM
This morning I had that thing where you're asleep but your bladder starts aching, so you start dreaming about trying to find a toilet to use. After having found a toilet in my dream but still being disturbed by the urge to go, I woke myself up properly and forced myself to go to the bathroom. After all, I didn't want any accidents.
A short while later I got to my car to start the long journey to work, and the radio came on when I started the engine. And guess what song was playing?
Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go. ;D
Waaaaaa Hahaha! :D :laugh: OMG I've had those dreams and darn near didn't make it. I'm beginning to treat myself like a small child and limit my liquid intake to 6PM at latest.
Quote from: Shantel on June 17, 2014, 09:59:39 AM
Waaaaaa Hahaha! :D :laugh: OMG I've had those dreams and darn near didn't make it. I'm beginning to treat myself like a small child and limit my liquid intake to 6PM at latest.
I've had those dreams and actually
not made it... so I tend to be a bit more careful now.
But yeah, when that song came on the radio I was pretty glad my bladder was empty. ;D
Quote from: FTMDiaries on June 17, 2014, 10:14:40 AM
I've had those dreams and actually not made it... so I tend to be a bit more careful now.
But yeah, when that song came on the radio I was pretty glad my bladder was empty. ;D
Was that "The Village People" who sang that?
Quote from: Shantel on June 17, 2014, 10:15:53 AM
Was that "The Village People" who sang that?
Close! It was Wham! - but if I hadn't forced myself out of bed, I would have been...
[sunglasses]
... in the Navy.
[YEEEEAAAAHHHH!]
Quote from: FTMDiaries on June 17, 2014, 10:51:47 AM
Close! It was Wham! - but if I hadn't forced myself out of bed, I would have been...
[sunglasses]
... in the Navy.
[YEEEEAAAAHHHH!]
Go to www.rentaboat! :D
I like that get up music, makes me want to dance though I'm more of the ZZ Tops and Pink Floyd genre.
Black Adder - Series 1 especially Episode 5 & 6
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FH3RSd4E.jpg&hash=c9eec3d05737d77be8f759a02778e4f03588fc78)
^^^^^ :icon_mrgreen:
How very true...
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FkChtVsJ.jpg&hash=6183ba99764406a71cfe3b8bb20ddcca6f8c4e1c)
:D :D
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As a gay man, I can't say I've experienced this, but I do know some people and I can imagine it!
http://imgur.com/gallery/7G9HOXQ
Quote from: dalebert on June 17, 2014, 09:23:51 PM
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LOL. It is so true!!!
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This:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_li_d_YviZ4
Quote from: dalebert on June 18, 2014, 01:07:53 PM
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This is my working life at the moment. I can't believe I was happy about it 17 games ago, is it over now. Please tell me it's over now.
Bowie and Jagger are funny on there own. Together laughter gold
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Quote from: dalebert on June 19, 2014, 10:41:06 AM
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Waaaa Hahaha! :D Yeah reminds me of the annual finger wave, "Uh-was it good for you doc?" ;D
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The "More Bad Jokes" thread and every post in it appears to have vanished without a trace. Does anyone know why?
I get that its either deleted or located in some secret spot that only the elite have access to.
Quote from: the old mare on June 22, 2014, 08:22:44 AM
I get that its either deleted or located in some secret spot that only the elite have access to.
I'm not the elite!? There go my delusions of grandeur.
Quote from: dalebert on June 22, 2014, 08:18:02 AM
The "More Bad Jokes" thread and every post in it appears to have vanished without a trace. Does anyone know why?
Yes, apparently someone posted a joke that contained Malware which began generating a Malware warning
I loved that topic and feel pretty bad about having to remove it but there was no other option
We'll have to start a new one if someone hasn't already
Hugs
V M
Just Started one.
Punish away!
Oh noes! It feels devastating, like the burning of the Library of Alexandria!
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2F8A6SvCV.jpg&hash=33aefbeccf810b9eb097f7e22e578d23168c4fa2)
I just got called an 'apex predator' by a fellow South African, because of the surprisingly huge number of species I've eaten in the form of biltong.
(Biltong is dried meat; pretty much the South African equivalent of jerky, but way more awesome).
Quote from: dalebert on June 24, 2014, 06:39:02 AM
Sexy!
One of the first thoughts that came to my mind was to get 'apex predator' printed on a T-Shirt... I've been looking for a shirt to wear to London Pride. ;)
Okay, it took like a day and a half, but I reread through this thread from the beginning. That made laugh.
Also this walmart employee -
http://imgur.com/a/t5ldW (http://imgur.com/a/t5ldW)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lf3Kyv_iaNs
i slept for 13 hours yesterday including a 3 hour nap, i still cant wake up. its funny really since i dont sleep ;D
Howard and Bernadette's wedding scene on The Big Bang Theory
An anti-speeding ad that was produced in Northern Ireland. It's so unintentionally absurd that it's completely comical.
(https://fbcdn-sphotos-h-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-xpf1/t1.0-9/10462974_988974124465374_2506384965555609122_n.jpg)
Odd reminiscences of younger days...
There was a mgr. when I worked at a Sizzler's restaurant, he was pretty much a nice guy and none of us were quite sure as to where he was from, but he was always yelling "Hop ti bobby!!! I ->-bleeped-<- on the floor!!!" and holding his hand under his butt... None of us ever quite knew what he meant but it always brought a smile and a bit of a chuckle
This interaction between two young boys in my gym's changing room at lunchtime today:
Boy #1, waving his underwear around: "Wave your pants in the air like you just don't care!"
Boy #2: "Frankly, I do not care!"
Me: [PMSL] ;D
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FiS2iXza.jpg&hash=6660524cc35e62d4b532e25b38b0eceffc71bfdf)
http://imgur.com/hyHJBgF
Various commercials on GTA & Saints Row.
The Tribunal cases on League of Legends.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q8UI7C0Qlk0
Oh, you know... just somebody driving on the opposite side of the motorway this morning, towing an enormous rocket. As you do.
Quote from: FTMDiaries on July 04, 2014, 03:33:23 AM
Oh, you know... just somebody driving on the opposite side of the motorway this morning, towing an enormous rocket. As you do.
At least it wasn't this:
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.strangebeaver.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2014%2F01%2Ftraffic%2Ffunny-pictures-from-traffic-1.jpg&hash=79aa461bfc279315ac1d551b7704a814ceddd4bc)
Quote from: Cindy on July 04, 2014, 03:41:36 AM
At least it wasn't this:
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.strangebeaver.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2014%2F01%2Ftraffic%2Ffunny-pictures-from-traffic-1.jpg&hash=79aa461bfc279315ac1d551b7704a814ceddd4bc)
LOL - that's epic! And it brings back fond memories.
When I was a kid back in the 1970s, it was pretty common for kids to ride in the backs of bakkies (what Americans may call pick-up trucks, or British folks may call a 4x4, or Australasians may call a ute). Here's a pic I found on Google of some random kids doing the same thing... I fondly remember standing in the back of a bakkie holding onto the rollbar like those kids, bombing along bumpy dirt roads at high speeds.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Froadsafety.co.za%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2011%2F12%2FBakkie-with-children-2-1024x666.jpg&hash=19a8a67b00cc6b4bdce1f2f7aebf76c2300f84a3)
Now
that was fun. ;D
The South African authorities discourage it now. Something to do with South Africa's high road death toll or something...
I rather enjoyed this:
http://rationalwiki.org/wiki/Argumentum_ad_cellarium
Quote from: Kimberley Beauregard on July 04, 2014, 05:54:11 AM
I rather enjoyed this:
http://rationalwiki.org/wiki/Argumentum_ad_cellarium
Oh yeah love it and know we have more than a few of those here. :D :laugh:
Trigger warning. LITERALLY!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m9-kM-guQtk
He should have heeded your trigger warning!
My cat has been showing stalking behaviors towards a family of blue jays outside, but his version of sneaky involves a lot of meowing. I'm pretty sure those jays could wallop him in a fight. xD
My kid tried to brag about her candy from the comic shop to the guy at the corner store by showing him the half-eaten candy. I understand being proud of that score, but it made me laugh that she felt like she needed to prove it.
And this -
https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/8241174016/hBBC04EFB/ (https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/8241174016/hBBC04EFB/)
(ignore the comments if you click on that)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=miLBEMYAaH8
The Plank - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JyU6SonN6mc This is one of the funniest Short Movies ever
........ Me!!!
http://imgur.com/a/hot8K
Quote from: Felix on July 06, 2014, 06:04:59 AM
My cat has been showing stalking behaviors towards a family of blue jays outside, but his version of sneaky involves a lot of meowing. I'm pretty sure those jays could wallop him in a fight. xD
That reminds me of when I was a kid. We had this white, female cat named Fluffy. We had her for several years by this point. I was sitting on the back porch and I see her come around from the left side of the house just FLYING! A Blue Jay (I'm assuming it was the mother) was virtually on top of her chirping, squawking like crazy while Fluffy was trying to escape from her. I assumed it was due to Fluffy attempting to (yet again) get at the nest of babies in the tree that was in our front yard. It was pretty funny, actually.
I will never think of the Cookie Monster the same again!!!!!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=649cL11RUXY (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=649cL11RUXY)
A seagull following me around when I was mowing the back yard. It was scarfing up the stunned grasshoppers I left in my wake. The mower itself didn't bother it in the least.
Quote from: the old gray mare on July 06, 2014, 03:38:54 PM
A seagull following me around when I was mowing the back yard. It was scarfing up the stunned grasshoppers I left in my wake. The mower itself didn't bother it in the least.
Smart bird, knows a free lunch when it sees it!
I've just had my latest order from an - ahem - adult toy shop delivered to my work address. Yes, they are that discreet... and I am that brazen. ;D
Anyway, my colleague signs for the delivery and brings the parcel to my office. Our conversation goes like this:
Me: "Oh, brilliant! Thank you so much!"
Colleague: "Pleasure!"
Me: [Choking back the laughter]
As soon as she left the room, I burst out laughing from her ironic choice of words.
Talking to a friend on my cell/mobile phone... she says something about having sent me a text I didn't remember getting, so while I'm talking to her I start looking for my phone to check. Couldn't see it around me, which I thought was odd since I'd only seen it a minute or two earlier. Yes, I was talking to her with the phone I was looking for. No, neither of us realised. It finally occurred to me and I fessed up. We both had a good laugh at that... sheesh, worse than looking for glasses your wearing!
Quote from: Ms Grace on July 07, 2014, 05:34:46 AM
Talking to a friend on my cell/mobile phone... she says something about having sent me a text I didn't remember getting, so while I'm talking to her I start looking for my phone to check. Couldn't see it around me, which I thought was odd since I'd only seen it a minute or two earlier. Yes, I was talking to her with the phone I was looking for. No, neither of us realised. It finally occurred to me and I fessed up. We both had a good laugh at that... sheesh, worse than looking for glasses your wearing!
Thank you Grace I can now feel safe to post this. Running around my unit this morning looking for my glasses, panicked because I was late and I had to open. Yes I was wearing them, the kicker I have to wear tinted lenses with the lights on I should of realized I had them on. (Can I blame it on a Monday?)
Quote from: immortal gypsy on July 07, 2014, 05:59:16 AM
Thank you Grace I can now feel safe to post this. Running around my unit this morning looking for my glasses, panicked because I was late and I had to open. Yes I was wearing them, the kicker I have to wear tinted lenses with the lights on I should of realized I had them on. (Can I blame it on a Monday?)
Hah Grace and Gypsy, wait til you get my age, you ain't experienced nuthin yet! Hmmm uh why did I come in this room?
Making my first noise after voice surgery... I sounded like a dolphin that's just had its flipper tugged on!
"4 Groups That Gotta Go" clip by George Carlin that I saw on YouTube. ;D
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Quote from: Livvykins on July 07, 2014, 10:34:14 AM
Making my first noise after voice surgery... I sounded like a dolphin that's just had its flipper tugged on!
That's hot.
Quote from: Shantel on July 07, 2014, 10:15:30 AM
Hah Grace and Gypsy, wait til you get my age, you ain't experienced nuthin yet! Hmmm uh why did I come in this room?
You came into this room to make fun of Grace and I for having Mondayitist
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qkQ7o-gWWng
Buff Jedi ghosts. Warning: has wordy derds so mildly NSFW. (//http://)
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This kind of thing happens all the time, but my cat is getting really nervous when I try to practice making sounds my language doesn't have. I can't tell if he thinks I'm growling or something or if he thinks I'm about to sneeze (most claw-related mishaps in my house occur after sneezing too close to the cat) or if he can actually tell that I'm not vocalizing the same way I do when I'm talking normally.
Also my kid keeps announcing to total strangers that we have a cat, and often goes on to describe the cat and then ask the other person if they, too, own a cat. She's probably been doing this for the entire time we've had a cat but I occasionally notice and it's hard not to laugh. There was a fluff piece on the radio over the weekend where they interviewed a lady who writes mystery novels and asked her to give a lists of do's and don't's for people who wish to survive a mystery novel, and ever since then my daughter has been concerned that someone is going to break into our house and kidnap the cat, "because he's so pretty they might think he's a purebred." He's an old brown and white tabby mix from the pound, but I love that she thinks he's that special. :laugh:
Quote from: Felix on July 10, 2014, 02:31:55 AM
This kind of thing happens all the time, but my cat is getting really nervous when I try to practice making sounds my language doesn't have. I can't tell if he thinks I'm growling or something or if he thinks I'm about to sneeze (most claw-related mishaps in my house occur after sneezing too close to the cat) or if he can actually tell that I'm not vocalizing the same way I do when I'm talking normally.
Also my kid keeps announcing to total strangers that we have a cat, and often goes on to describe the cat and then ask the other person if they, too, own a cat. She's probably been doing this for the entire time we've had a cat but I occasionally notice and it's hard not to laugh. There was a fluff piece on the radio over the weekend where they interviewed a lady who writes mystery novels and asked her to give a lists of do's and don't's for people who wish to survive a mystery novel, and ever since then my daughter has been concerned that someone is going to break into our house and kidnap the cat, "because he's so pretty they might think he's a purebred." He's an old brown and white tabby mix from the pound, but I love that she thinks he's that special. :laugh:
Oh my gosh, that is too cute!
How old is she?
Some random guy was walking down our road this morning with an England flag draped across his back like a cape... and a 1960s-era Batman costume held aloft in his right hand like a trophy. As you do.
So true.
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OK, it was yesterday, but...
My doctor who is ripping my nads out on Tuesday asked me if I wanted him to get rid of a mole on my nose while he had me under. I asked him if it looked malignant to him, and he said "maybe". I shrugged, pointed to it, and said, "Really, this little thing?"
He said, "No, I didn't notice that one. I was referring to that big one below it."
"Umm, that's a diamond."
I guess I needed to clean my nose stud.
Quote from: Jill F on July 10, 2014, 01:03:08 PM
I guess I needed to clean my nose stud.
Ew! I'm glad it made you laugh though. ;D
Quote from: Jill F on July 10, 2014, 01:03:08 PM
OK, it was yesterday, but...
My doctor who is ripping my nads out on Tuesday asked me if I wanted him to get rid of a mole on my nose while he had me under. I asked him if it looked malignant to him, and he said "maybe". I shrugged, pointed to it, and said, "Really, this little thing?"
He said, "No, I didn't notice that one. I was referring to that big one below it."
"Umm, that's a diamond."
I guess I needed to clean my nose stud.
LOL that is nasty but I love it.
Haha I just found one:
What is Minecraft?
Hitler's lesser known second book about his love of knitting.
A bit of background, I have been going to the same family doctor (GP) for 25 years, he has helped through depression, illness everything. Four years ago (about? time flies) I came out to him as trans*, I was his first and still only trans*patient. He helped me get a referral and has been keenly interested in my progress, he has been wonderful.
I went to see him today for a 6 month regular BP etc check up, I walked into his office and his first words were:
"Nice rack" "Oh I hope I didn't offend you!" and blushed, we had a good laugh and no I was not in the least offended.
Felt great in fact!!
My favourite not-very-heteronormative colleague just sent me a one-word email after I sorted something out for him:
"Splendid"
What a word - that tickled me. :)
Quote from: Jill F on July 11, 2014, 11:07:07 AMUnfortunately there are two entire counties in Ohio that I probably can't set foot in now without being run out of town by angry mobs of people with quetionable genetics wielding torches and pitchforks. I still hold on to a glimmer of hope that someone will eventually decide that the 1950s are probably actually over by now.
Some dork on Youtube said that I was crazy when I called him out on his transphobia. My response was: "The voices in my head would beg to differ with you."
Reading that someone was told by his "mates" that shouting "Oi wanker" was a traditional East London greeting.His black eye should be clearing up by now
Australian Tank Corp
(https://fbcdn-sphotos-c-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-xpa1/t1.0-9/1549551_10152164227845598_6581195148671862875_n.jpg)
That awkward moment when I'm composing a text to my boss, and my phone decides to auto-correct 'you're right' to 'you're tight'.
Thank goodness I caught that one before I sent it!
Quote from: FTMDiaries on July 17, 2014, 10:03:04 AM
That awkward moment when I'm composing a text to my boss, and my phone decides to auto-correct 'you're right' to 'you're tight'.
Thank goodness I caught that one before I sent it!
Waaaaa Hahaha :D My operating system does that, it tries to think for me. Grrrrrr :icon_userfriendly:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VVYN8JMnem0
Thinknig about the other day when I tried to let my nephew learn some Russian. He said he wanted to learn Spanish, but I said I wanted to learn Russian. He told me "if you want to learn russian, then go to New York, because there are a lot of Russians there." I told him "well, if you want to learn spanish, then go down to Mexico then." We were also playing a basketball video game and I chose a team of short girls (the ladies from 3LW actually) and one of the girls dunked on him and my nephew goes "oh my gosh a girl dunked on me? I am so embarrassed."
I love him.
A video of a sport's team mascot (guy in a bear suit) in a bar brawl
Was watching family feud and one of the questions was name the least athletic sport and a woman said boxing.....HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
One of the funniest men was Tommy Cooper:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oTY6TxXsK-o
The other day my cat was burrowing into my armpit, and I thought he was just being overly snuggly like he does sometimes, but he eventually wriggled into my hoodie and wedged himself into the space between my shirt and the jacket. He's done it quite a few times since, and he doesn't seem to care whether I lean forward in my chair to let him breathe or not. Cats are bizarre creatures. :laugh:
Other posts on this thread made me laugh too. Definitely one of my favorites.
A sign I saw on the way to work this morning.
"Marriage is like a game of cards. First you start of with two hearts and a diamond. Then you wish you had a club and a spade"
NSFW WARNING: Link has adult language (http://imgur.com/gallery/32NriDQ)
Can relate! Thankfully, I've been in remission for some time now.
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My coworker...someone was trying to give her crap so she goes "I'm busy." He goes "you're not busy, you are just sitting there on your ass!" Her response: "yes. I am busy sitting on my ass." I lost it right there and then hahaha.
My mother's overreaction to my going out of state with some friends this weekend. I never go anywhere. If I do, it's just to see family members that live here in town and even though I do love them. It can get awfully boring after a while. She's convinced that something bad is going to happen to me because she worries about everything when it comes to me. I just laughed it off and told her that she worries way too much and we are going to be fine.
The way I see it, even if something bad happened to me. (Worst case scenario: I die in one way or another in some freak accident). If it does occur, then so what? They better bury me with my Portia doll once my body is shipped back, that's all I'm saying.
I seriously doubt that anything is going to happen. I've never done anything in my life other than a six week trip to Ohio to go to a crappy trade school and that entire experience sucked. I want more out of my life than to look back on it when I am on my death bed and have nothing to show for it other than decades of wasted chances and inactivity.
She wants to "talk about it" tomorrow when we go to the grocery store. I think she's got it in her head that she can talk me out of doing this. :D :D No chance of that. The only way I am not doing this is if my friend's car breaks down before the trip.
But it's funny to think about this and how silly her reaction is. I'm almost 40 for frigs sake. Well....chronologically speaking. Psychologically it's much younger than that some days. :D :D She just worries too much and really needs to relax.
Quote from: Laura Squirrel on July 28, 2014, 09:19:26 PM
She wants to "talk about it" tomorrow when we go to the grocery store. I think she's got it in her head that she can talk me out of doing this. :D :D No chance of that. The only way I am not doing this is if my friend's car breaks down before the trip.
But it's funny to think about this and how silly her reaction is. I'm almost 40 for frigs sake. Well....chronologically speaking. Psychologically it's much younger than that some days. :D :D She just worries too much and really needs to relax.
I dunno Laura, that porcupine thing makes me wonder too! :D ;D >:-) Ok just kidding you hon, time to get your own life and have some experiences.
Quote from: Shantel on July 28, 2014, 09:31:21 PM
I dunno Laura, that porcupine thing makes me wonder too! :D ;D >:-) Ok just kidding you hon, time to get your own life and have some experiences.
:D :D Believe me, you aren't the only person that has scratched their head over my Portia fixation. You're right, I DO need to get out and do something. So far, the tiny handful of things that I've done have sucked. This may end up being one of them. But I won't know until I try, right? Hell, my brother runs all over the country with four kids all under the age of six and she has no worries about THAT. I don't know about her, sometimes.
I was on Facebook and saw a picture of Noah in the Ark while people were drowning and trying to climb in the boat and while they are doing that, Noah yells out "GOD LOVES YOU ..and has a wonderful plan for your life!"
Hahahaha!
My next door neighbor who often yells strange things that I usually don't understand when I walk down the hallway blurted out "I know you're a girl!!!" then went on with his odd mutterings while stomping and clanging things about
Not actually sure if that's funny or not :-\
For me it was thinking during work. I was getting memories of in high school, and I was in a little comedy group with 3 others, and we made sketches and shorts and stuff, but never actually got really...well posting stuff online. But usually when eating at lunch together we would just come up with silly things, and the last one I can remember one of my friends coming up with (wish I could do it live so it's better than just text) but it was having a nice midage British accent(which we are all experts at the british accent) and it would show this guy who would say "You know, after 20 years of livin' I've learned it's not about how much money ya got. It's not the car you drive...It's what ya got in your pants." then it would show a little wimpy kid, and he looks down to his...pants, and in a high British wimpy accent "I hope not."
It's probably not funny at all just reading this, but it was cracking me up so much, cuz the way we would say it was just so good. I hope some time in the future the 4 of us can get together and make some stuff and post them to YouTube. We had some really good ideas.
I'm tired, and I was reading through recent updates and somehow read "needles" as "noodles." Now I'm thinking about injecting with noodles, and where to buy the right noodles, and how to correctly dispose of noodles, and how to get over fear of noodles. I love it. ;D
Quote from: King Malachite on July 28, 2014, 09:45:00 PM
I was on Facebook and saw a picture of Noah in the Ark while people were drowning and trying to climb in the boat and while they are doing that, Noah yells out "GOD LOVES YOU ..and has a wonderful plan for your life!"
Okay, everyone here needs to listen up. Go into your Addons for your browser and search for "imgur uploader". It's super convenient. :police:
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2F6Bakyof.png&hash=9da0989c3a0b8dfb3ac6fd0bdfa4bff5820ddb7b)
Quote from: Felix on July 29, 2014, 02:17:20 AM
...and how to get over fear of noodles. I love it. ;D
Beware the Flying Spaghetti Monster!
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Quote from: dalebert on July 29, 2014, 08:09:48 AM
Beware the Flying Spaghetti Monster!
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What is the deal with that spaghetti monster? I haven't heard of it until just this month, and apparently its a popular meme.
Quote from: Sam314 on July 29, 2014, 11:05:14 AM
What is the deal with that spaghetti monster? I haven't heard of it until just this month, and apparently its a popular meme.
http://www.venganza.org/ (http://www.venganza.org/) Its a safe site.
Quote from: Jaime R D on July 29, 2014, 11:15:11 AM
http://www.venganza.org/ (http://www.venganza.org/) Its a safe site.
Interesting. Never would have guessed that.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tYVCk10AzS0
Quote from: dalebert on July 31, 2014, 07:00:35 AM
google google google
They googled Colbert! I approve.
NSFW! Don't let the fact it's a cartoon fool you, or that it hasn't been banned from YouTube.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=me5rX7Y9XKU
Salesman was going over the features of my car and gets to one safety-type feature and goes "this is good because it won't hurt the ->-bleeped-<-." Lolol.
Quote from: Jaime R D on July 29, 2014, 11:15:11 AM
http://www.venganza.org/ (http://www.venganza.org/) Its a safe site.
My first reaction was.....what site is for safes? A large storage area full of safes?, a safe motel? err, I guess you don't mean the kind you store valuables in.
Quote from: birkin on August 01, 2014, 01:03:59 AM
Salesman was going over the features of my car and gets to one safety-type feature and goes "this is good because it won't hurt the ->-bleeped-<-." Lolol.
Hahaha when I first heard someone talking about ->-bleeped-<-s, an automobile transmission was the first thought that came to mind. What a shock to find out it was meant otherwise. I went huh? Wtf is that? :D >:-)
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Realizing that if I'd have stayed female, I'd look exactly like Cathy Brennan when I'm older. I don't know why I think that's funny, I just kept looking at her and thinking "omg she looks familiar, why" then later I saw an old picture of myself and was like "o.O Brennan!"
In line at the post office today, with lots of people around, my daughter loudly asks me how big my breasts got and how big I think hers will be. I didn't have time to consider my options, so I answer "Well, my mom's were pretty big," and she responds by asking me what size exactly. I said it was time to change the subject, but the thought of asking my mom about her bra size made me laugh.
I'll try to remember to talk to her about my own breasts sometime soon, without such a large audience. :laugh:
Quote from: Felix on August 01, 2014, 11:30:24 PM
In line at the post office today, with lots of people around, my daughter loudly asks me how big my breasts got and how big I think hers will be. I didn't have time to consider my options, so I answer "Well, my mom's were pretty big," and she responds by asking me what size exactly. I said it was time to change the subject, but the thought of asking my mom about her bra size made me laugh.
I'll try to remember to talk to her about my own breasts sometime soon, without such a large audience. :laugh:
That reminded me of this bit from Seinfeld. :D
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NbNyMuKAg6g
Now just imagine the Friends theme song playing along.
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The people who, when the topic of transgender comes up, tell me they can "always tell." Clearly not, guuurl.
I forgot I had put this as my desktop, and it startled me when I turned my computer on. :laugh:
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fdbjpq4m8xws63.cloudfront.net%2Fgallery%2Fimage%2Ffob9mzf&hash=856a0fbd2f301a5eba20a7c09ac011bee46fea07)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FTMuFaTJ.jpg&hash=aa366a3dc0eb2f50a57436f711aed9eeeb65087f) (http://penny-arcade.com/comic/2014/08/06)
Zero Punctuation :laugh:
This happened the other day, but it just came in the mail and reminded me. I wanted to buy an album from a Belgian artist called Stromae. I couldn't load his site to buy directly from him, so I went to ebay. His music is kinda cheesy clubby electronic beats with rap-style vocals, but each and every seller had him categorized as "soul/r&b," which in hindsight I can only assume is what happens when people where I live see a black guy wearing a sweater vest. :laugh:
Imagining Sandra Dickinson's wife throwing a bigoted Italian into a Venetian canal :laugh:
Quote from: Felix on August 07, 2014, 05:33:01 AM
...which in hindsight I can only assume is what happens when people where I live see a black guy wearing a sweater vest. :laugh:
Strange. Makes me think of Bill Cosby.
So the girl I was convinced was a mega lesbian goes "yeah me and my boyfriend went out last night." I played it cool but then she goes "you know you remind me of this gay guy I know...maybe I should hook you up...oh sorry I don't actually know if you are gay, I just assumed. You act very feminine." Then I laughed and said no, I am straight but I thought you were a lesbian because you are very tomboyish."
Just goes to show you. Then a bisexual girl piped up and said "I knew you were both straight, but this show how badly straight people's gaydars suck."
Quote from: dalebert on August 07, 2014, 07:42:35 AM
Strange. Makes me think of Bill Cosby.
Actually, yeah. I guess I should be surprised it wasn't all listed as humor/spoken word. :laugh:
Quote from: birkin on August 09, 2014, 12:13:03 AM
So the girl I was convinced was a mega lesbian goes "yeah me and my boyfriend went out last night." I played it cool but then she goes "you know you remind me of this gay guy I know...maybe I should hook you up...oh sorry I don't actually know if you are gay, I just assumed. You act very feminine." Then I laughed and said no, I am straight but I thought you were a lesbian because you are very tomboyish."
Just goes to show you. Then a bisexual girl piped up and said "I knew you were both straight, but this show how badly straight people's gaydars suck."
This entire exchange is hilarious. xD
What made me laugh earlier was my cat pursuing his war against the orange neighbor cat. Not the brightest of felines, my cat fearlessly launches himself at the screen door every time the orange cat walks by. Then he disentangles his claws and runs full speed up the stairs and gets confused on the landing because nothing up there leads to the orange cat at all.
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This comes from our friend Tony in Denmark. Thought it was wonderful how these disabled fellows have turned the bitter lemons that life has served them into lemonade as they present this comedic self-depricating song, they come from Sweden.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AmJ6FDj9R1k
QuoteA 2006 study found that the average American walks about 900 miles a year.
Another study found that Americans drink an average of 22 gallons of beer a year.
That means, on average, Americans get about 41 miles per gallon.
Quote from: dalebert on August 10, 2014, 03:14:09 PM
A 2006 study found that the average American walks about 900 miles a year.
Another study found that Americans drink an average of 22 gallons of beer a year.
That means, on average, Americans get about 41 miles per gallon.
I think I need to swap my car for an American! Perhaps I can hire one to carry me around. ;D
Quote from: FTMDiaries on August 11, 2014, 08:21:25 AM
I think I need to swap my car for an American! Perhaps I can hire one to carry me around. ;D
You might want to rethink your math. Compare the cost of a gallon of gas to a gallon of beer!
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimagizer.imageshack.us%2Fv2%2Fxq90%2F910%2Fnb3s3P.jpg&hash=c9320bb289bc9fc7634f6cef8f356616ac6dccfd) (https://imageshack.com/i/panb3s3Pj)
Quote from: dalebert on August 11, 2014, 12:27:58 PM
You might want to rethink your math. Compare the cost of a gallon of gas to a gallon of beer!
Awww, but Dale... it'd be
fun to have a cute American carry me around everywhere! ;D
Anyway, let's look at my maths: having looked up what a gallon is (bear in mind I'm in the UK where we use the metric system) I see that there are 3.79 litres per gallon. Well, the petrol I use in my car is currently about £1.28 per litre, or £4.85 per gallon... which is $8.13 per gallon. I can get beer for half that price. ;)
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Quote from: dalebert on August 15, 2014, 06:47:21 PM
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True that tho.
Quote from: dalebert on August 15, 2014, 06:47:21 PM
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I hate expose's about myself!
My dad telling my mom to shut up.
This has been floating around for awhile but I ran into it again recently and the ice cream comment reminded me of it. I first saw it labeled merely "adulthood." :laugh:
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Also I just went to put the cat litter in the dumpster and a neighbor told me he would give me a kmart bike tomorrow if I get him two forties. ;D
Velisperaptor
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kJW1AXwrByk
Shantel's comment about her wife having so many shoes you'd think she was a centipede. :laugh:
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Quote from: Felix on August 18, 2014, 02:55:34 AM
Shantel's comment about her wife having so many shoes you'd think she was a centipede. :laugh:
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:D :eusa_clap:
This is old but it makes me lol every time I see it -
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Quote from: Felix on August 21, 2014, 12:12:08 AM
This is old but it makes me lol every time I see it -
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LOL! Wow.
Watching these scenes from The Mask (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0110475/), 1994 with Jim Carrey - the first time I've watched any of it in ages...I completely forgot about it...I am definitely going to try and watch the whole thing again soon, it's pretty funny.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aH6m_JSZyig
I was at the Apple store today the young GLB type lady manager's eyes kept darting to my chest as we talked (now I know what women go through when people talk to their boobs) Since I dress andro I asked her if maybe her trans-dar had gone off. She was
"I uh-but,but-um-yeah kinda I think!" I told her, "No problem hon I was just curious!", we both laughed!
I saw a slogan on the side of a Ginsters van which said:
"More satisfying than opening a jar that another man failed to open."
That made me smile.
I'm such a dork.
I was lucky enough to find an SKB rack case at a local music shop for $50. It was obviously used. But that's fine. It's in good shape. But me being the mechanically incompetent moron that I am, it took forever for me to figure out how to open it. I kept staring it like a dork and finally gave up. :D I looked up a video on Youtube about this case and I REALLY felt stupid after that. :D All you do is basically unlock it and flip the locks up. BOOM! It's open. :D
What a dork.
QuoteOh look, I got a new Snapchat. It's-- not from one of my friends. And it's live coverage of an electronic music festival I've never heard of. And there's no way to get rid of it.
That's uh, that's great Snapchat.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi997.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Faf96%2Fjamboe1%2F85fafdde-dd1a-4c1a-9eb3-daabee86c88e_zpsc0ce20f9.jpg&hash=846ebc9a8b668b4e1d8ebaeaceb658082cea62c5)
(What made me laugh today)
This is brilliant.
(https://fbcdn-sphotos-f-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-xap1/v/t1.0-9/10520519_738952942837836_2756241283354893626_n.jpg?oh=e2f6f6c4a5a814f620985cc3d719f3c5&oe=5477051E&__gda__=1416152258_6639de38dbaef12df9cdb5231699a70c)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FHbu7d2Q.jpg&hash=49780a040e380d83f8800db7ddf690e7626393fa)
Just as a side note, (I've just realised this) you can click on images to see their original size, it automatically shrinks them down beforehand. Funny pics! ;D
Today I have delved into YTMND again for the first time in a long time...came across this one, 'Be safe this Halloween' (http://safeuntsound.ytmnd.com/), made me laugh. But it's a great song! I've never heard it before! In a nutshell it is a guy in black with a pumpkin as his head dancing, on a loop, to 'Capital Cities - Safe and Sound' in a graveyard (not sure if it's a real graveyard).
Seeing a picture of Vladimir Putin and Grumpy cat....they are perfect for each other....
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7-oFOBdc3SM
Speaking of Putin, I'm reminded of a Frankie Boyle quip from Mock The Week's Scenes We'd Love To See. The subject was Bad Ways For Gordon Brown To Address The Nation:
"In these troubled times between our nations, I feel I need to reach out to President Putin and say "I have shagged your mother"."
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FiNP6POE.jpg&hash=8e0cead735c013b4828dfaf0ca3b1f0fbbcc53df)
Had to laugh today at work as the girl who sits next to me and makes SO much noise.
Someone threw something at her in response to a cheeky comment and hit her in the front and she complained how much it hurt.
I could only laugh as I know the feeling. They are very tender.
She also notices everything to the smallest detail. Nothing yet from her as they are very hard to hide.. ;)
Ha...
J
Hearing someone wax poetic about a region I grew up desperate to get away from. It would have been rude to actually laugh out loud, but it was a funny reminder that anything can seem cool and exotic with enough distance. I wish I had been able to come up with the right words to communicate how amazing our own neighborhood still is to me.
The Dorian/Millwall firm scene in the Football Factory
A guy on my train carriage must have Tourette's or something. Poor guy I felt quite sorry for him even though he was randomly yelling c#%@ and f#*& and ->-bleeped-<-. And "cornflakes"...? I had to laugh at that.
What the cornflakes? :D
this...
http://v.theonion.com/onionmedia/videos/videometa/874/zen_mp4.mp4
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6ny6tiH_GTE
My friend telling me how I'm so repressed and how my dreams are so boring that I need to get more excitement in my life.
I remembered this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IuBjeLiWhek
It's the best thing ever. Whatever character you play, it's always worth lowering your intelligence just before you return the water chip for that scene alone.
There was a trail of thongs leading down the hall to my apartment door. I have never before been disappointed to open the door and see just my cat waiting for me.
I was looking up on Yahoo Answers the average lifespan of a spider (https://uk.answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=A9mSs3IGARxU3RMAzSVLBQx.;_ylu=X3oDMTE0aG1hMTkxBHNlYwNzcgRwb3MDMwRjb2xvA2lyMgR2dGlkA1ZJUFVLMDlfMQ--?qid=20061025071334AA7KrTX) and the last comment made me laugh, "About 5 seconds after I see one.", not really the comment itself because anybody reading this please don't kill spiders! but there is 1 thumbs up, and 4 thumbs downs on it which made me laugh. What admirable consciences! Spiders are remarkable creatures.
I tried to take this quiz:
http://www.buzzfeed.com/jessicamisener/what-kind-of-man-turns-you-on#354237w
I did the first question, OK, then I get to the second one "what would you do on your night in with your guy?" and I was like "ew, nvm." It's really a miracle that I ever managed to convince anyone I was a straight girl. It's a relief but also funny to look back.
People whom have all of their music in digital formats. Then they cop out and complain about how easily damaged physical media can be. I have a little known secret for these people: TAKE CARE OF YOUR STUFF!! I know it's a foreign concept to some people. But putting tapes and CD's back into their cases actually protects them. Also, you can't complain about your tapes warping and whatnot if you leave them in a hot car or just sling them somewhere. The same goes for CD's. You can't treat them as frisbees and coasters and expect them to work.
Dorks.
CDs of me playing make great drink coasters.
Quote from: Laura Squirrel on September 21, 2014, 04:42:02 PM
People whom have all of their music in digital formats. Then they cop out and complain about how easily damaged physical media can be. I have a little known secret for these people: TAKE CARE OF YOUR STUFF!! I know it's a foreign concept to some people. But putting tapes and CD's back into their cases actually protects them. Also, you can't complain about your tapes warping and whatnot if you leave them in a hot car or just sling them somewhere. The same goes for CD's. You can't treat them as frisbees and coasters and expect them to work.
Dorks.
Lol, aint this^^___^^ the truth! :D
Ally ;)
Mom told me that my dad (we still on silent treatment since June) doesn't want me transitioning in this house cause he's scared I might jumped or something. She tells me this 2 weeks away from my appointment after torturing myself for 3 months. Made me chuckle.
I'm not scared.
Quote from: Laura Squirrel on September 21, 2014, 04:42:02 PM
People whom have all of their music in digital formats. Then they cop out and complain about how easily damaged physical media can be. I have a little known secret for these people: TAKE CARE OF YOUR STUFF!! I know it's a foreign concept to some people. But putting tapes and CD's back into their cases actually protects them. Also, you can't complain about your tapes warping and whatnot if you leave them in a hot car or just sling them somewhere. The same goes for CD's. You can't treat them as frisbees and coasters and expect them to work.
Dorks.
lol well I am one of those people. I can take care of the physical discs and whatnot that I do have, but life happens and sometimes things get wrecked anyway. Like one time my dog knocked over my xbox because she's a blind dumbass and the disc spinned inside and got wrecked beyond repair. Wouldn't have happened were I playing one of my downloaded games on the hard drive, and if the hard drive got damaged, I could redownload the game at no cost.
Quote from: Laura Squirrel on September 21, 2014, 04:42:02 PM
People whom have all of their music in digital formats. Then they cop out and complain about how easily damaged physical media can be. I have a little known secret for these people: TAKE CARE OF YOUR STUFF!! I know it's a foreign concept to some people. But putting tapes and CD's back into their cases actually protects them. Also, you can't complain about your tapes warping and whatnot if you leave them in a hot car or just sling them somewhere. The same goes for CD's. You can't treat them as frisbees and coasters and expect them to work.
Dorks.
Uh -yeah CD's don't hold up well left on a black vinyl dashboard of the car in 98 degree heat, they look more like candidates for a Pringles container. :D
Scratching my growing breast(nail to shirt) and :o sharp and sudden pain. I don't know why I always laugh when I do that. Maybe its just the fact I'm growing breasts and get a lot of joy from that fact. ;D
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimagizer.imageshack.us%2Fv2%2Fxq90%2F661%2Fh4UDmv.jpg&hash=0cebd142daaea0e95dcd1e5e3642433359affd09) (https://imageshack.com/i/idh4UDmvj)
Quote from: Shantel on September 24, 2014, 09:50:10 AM
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimagizer.imageshack.us%2Fv2%2Fxq90%2F661%2Fh4UDmv.jpg&hash=0cebd142daaea0e95dcd1e5e3642433359affd09) (https://imageshack.com/i/idh4UDmvj)
This^^___^^ made me laugh today, lol! Thanks Auntie. Been sick all morning and afternoon. I needed a good laugh! :D
Ally ;)
Saw this from Twitter...
Laverne Cox ✔ @Lavernecox
#MittRomney is on the plane with me. #gag
Picking up my medication today at the chemist. The guy at the counter was trying to place it all in one of their small bags. I have seven different boxes, all different shapes and sizes. "I think we're going to need a bigger boat". I mean bag.
Checked out the CNN article on Malcolm Young. (What has happened to Malcolm is certainly not funny.) They used the photo from the "Highway To Hell" cover. :D
Wow...that's some world class journalism. I guess they forgot that AC/DC replaced their vocalist, went through two other drummers and released fifteen recordings of various types since that time.
Quote from: Jill F on September 25, 2014, 02:20:42 PM
Saw this from Twitter...
Laverne Cox ✔ @Lavernecox
#MittRomney is on the plane with me. #gag
LOL
How advertisers throw around the phrase "It's a life altering experience!" or "Things will never be the same again!" over some incredibly mediocre product.
Oh, and TV shopping channels. How enthusiastic people are about what they're peddling. If you were having a quiet drink with them, they probably wouldn't even remember the name of whatever they were trying to sell. It cracks me up, I can't help it. Programmed orgasmic enthusiasm. I want to know how to do that, lmao.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2Fai3bu4w.jpg&hash=fc1a520172d4afbe621415b643093e2aed35b9fa)
And then this after. Note that this video has some wordy dirds so prolly NSFW.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TvNEZ4WWQIk
This just goes to show how unsophisticated my sense of humor is.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FVKXOZo1.png&hash=9ba80c9b6aba101eed1ee606a36265076c01c6c2)
I like this kid. He plans ahead!
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FJGVoPdx.jpg&hash=d9071d3a5516ac125d3d76da907af3c226008582)
FBI Uncovers Al-Qaeda Plot To Just Sit Back And Enjoy Collapse Of United States
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fo.onionstatic.com%2Fimages%2F25%2F25904%2F16x9%2F700.jpg&hash=8f09749223c9f17c37aea20dff4076954c2fefa1) (http://www.theonion.com/articles/fbi-uncovers-alqaeda-plot-to-just-sit-back-and-enj,35788/)
A Boston Terrier with a black eye called....... Shiner!I love these dogs with squashed faces
Quote from: big kim on October 04, 2014, 08:23:42 AM
A Boston Terrier with a black eye called....... Shiner!I love these dogs with squashed faces
French Bulldogs are adorable too!
Quote from: Shantel on October 04, 2014, 09:32:55 AM
French Bulldogs are adorable too!
Long time Frenchie,Boston and Pug fan here.
Quote from: big kim on October 04, 2014, 10:11:47 AM
Long time Frenchie,Boston and Pug fan here.
Me too! I have been told that some Boston Bull Terriers have to be delivered cesarean because of their cute big heads, I dunno how true that is?
My dog who is a small pitbull puppy had been in her cage since about 1, it is now 330. When I let her outside a man was walking down the sidewalk, and my dog went running out the door. (Keep in mind she stands about ankle high right now, but she is a pit) this guy sees my dog come out the door, and screams in this really high pitch voice, and runs away from her, like she was going to attack him.
She just really had to pee
Just read this on the Cracked.com forums:
"The GF dragged me to church yesterday, and as I was scanning the song sheet, I misread "WALKING with Jesus" as "WANKING with Jesus" and I spent the whole song shaking with barely contained laughter."
I think I woke the neighbours up with my laughter.
Quote from: Kimberley Beauregard on October 05, 2014, 05:12:54 AM
"WANKING with Jesus"
You may have figured out a way to get even me to go to church!
That is a riot! :laugh: :D
Quote from: Kimberley Beauregard on October 05, 2014, 05:12:54 AM
Just read this on the Cracked.com forums:
I misread "WALKING with Jesus" as "WANKING with Jesus"
LOL... I needed a good laugh :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
I'm glad this entertained you all, that brought a smile to my face.
Quote from: Kimberley Beauregard on October 05, 2014, 05:12:54 AM
Just read this on the Cracked.com forums:
"The GF dragged me to church yesterday, and as I was scanning the song sheet, I misread "WALKING with Jesus" as "WANKING with Jesus" and I spent the whole song shaking with barely contained laughter."
I think I woke the neighbours up with my laughter.
Reminds me of all the snickering over the "Jesus is coming!" bumper stickers that were popular for a hot minute
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aEsaI-cS-kI
:D :D
How to Cook a F***ing Steak (NSFW--language, Maybe trigger warning?) (http://www.theawl.com/2009/11/how-to-cook-a--%3E-bleeped-%3C-ing-steak)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FTpTxqzv.jpg&hash=ff88fbe96d7132b7dc4a7f5f7521b676bfc8f893)
A niece's rather excited selfie with Hillary Clinton in the background.
of course it was labeled #hillaryclintonselfie2014
I was searching for my insurance card for 10 minutes and then I stopped to pray to God that I will find it and within a minute later, my mom called, giving me some idea of where it might be, and that made me remember where it was. She was outside waiting for me and I told her I had lost the card.
I laughed and thanked God and said something along the lines of, well if You can answer that prayer, then perhaps you will answer the one about me finding a wife. :D
I had affirmation of my identified gender last night. Smacked a skeeter (mosquito). Flicked it off my finger. A lady friend starts to offer me a paper towel but I am already wiping it on my shirt-tail.
"Oh, you got it. Gay, but still a dude."
Quote from: dalebert on October 16, 2014, 08:00:53 AM
I had my gender validated last night. Smacked a skeeter (mosquito). Flicked it off my finger. A lady friend starts to offer me a paper towel but I am already wiping it on my shirt-tail.
"Oh, you got it. Gay, but still a dude."
:D :eusa_clap:
A pug who wriggled out of his lead and had his owner chasing after him
One of my sisters calling me to complain that she gave herself a fat lip picking up her bag as she was leaving for work. A qualified chef with 7 years experience running a kitchen. This girl has to be one of the clumsy people I know, the fact she has only had one bad kitchen injury is amazement to the both of us.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q1UfcxCrMII
Quote from: Laura Squirrel on October 17, 2014, 11:00:28 PM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q1UfcxCrMII
Wow^^___^^, Do it yourself pooh. What will they think of next?, lol! :D
Ally ;)
I don't know, but I shudder the thought of what would top that concept. I wouldn't even want to hazard a guess. It reminds me of what my dog leaves in the backyard.
Quote from: Allyda on October 18, 2014, 07:45:10 AM
Wow^^___^^, Do it yourself pooh. What will they think of next?, lol! :D
Ally ;)
Some of my neighbors had gathered and were complaining that they only received $xxxxx for their disabilities, when I pointed out that they all received $300 - $600 more than I do plus other benifits they all shut up and went home
http://imgur.com/gallery/YLTZyZP (http://imgur.com/gallery/YLTZyZP)
Quote from: Edge on October 25, 2014, 09:26:50 AM
http://imgur.com/gallery/YLTZyZP (http://imgur.com/gallery/YLTZyZP)
Hoo-ah! Wolverine-lumberjack cross breeds, such fierce animals!
When I was logging in to Susan's, I mistyped my username as "littleredrobinhoof"
I ain't even a brony, but I still found that funny. :laugh:
Quote from: littleredrobinhood on October 27, 2014, 06:04:03 AM
When I was logging in to Susan's, I mistyped my username as "littleredrobinhoof"
That should actually be a MLP character.
(https://scontent-b-dfw.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-xpf1/v/t1.0-9/p720x720/10565036_10154866901275078_9042579562544112944_n.png?oh=57b63a82b0c8a825f838a1e47cb62654&oe=54E38D73)
This happened yesterday.
Went into the city to pick up the rest of my medication, (I always get my meds from this chemist, they know this why don't they just have next months ready)
Noticed a new store, went in had a look around and bought a few things. The girl at the counter looks at my top and starts to laugh.
The store was called Suga (a lolly shop)
My top: Evil needs candy
I completely forgot I was wearing it, but its true evil does need candy
This made me giggle so much. The things some guys will do, lol. You wouldn't get me within a hundred feet of one of those in a million years, haha.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mb-QVfwCmYg
I got a call from my aunt, whom got a call from my mom. Apparently, my mom saw some woman in Wal-Mart that had the same hair, coat and walk as I. She was trying to call my cell phone. But I leave it off when I am home to conserve the battery. So, she called my aunt, my aunt called me, and I called my mom. :D She was, like, "Where are you at?". I replied: "I'm in my apartment". :D So, apparently, I have a twin sister lurking around here somewhere.
A kid on the bus was playing with a Boston Terrier and squeezed it's belly.It farted and cleared the bus with the smell!
This Facebook status from one of my friends. He posted it some time ago but I always enjoy it.
"As a sex positive feminist, I encourage you to masturbate as much as you want.
"But don't watch porn. Porn objectifies women. Be sure to ask for consent before fantasizing about someone. In fact, don't think about anything. Just sit in the corner and repeat the phrase "I am a cis-scum patriarch" until you reach your fourth orgasm. Always wear a condom, a non-latex glove, a dental dam in your mouth, and an assortment of elbow pads, because you can never be too careful. Keep your clothes on in case someone walks in the room and feels uncomfortable. Don't use any lubricant unless you can confirm it contains organic ingredients. Don't move too fast or you'll startle yourself. Keep a hardcover copy of Pride and Prejudice in your back pocket. And above all, have fun!"
http://www.earthporm.com/trap-cat-3-easy-steps/
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FkiS0bQT.jpg&hash=a6a15a6a1a5f6469e514577e6fbfa25dbe95fac9)
What , forgot the starting gun? (also known as the can opener).
Thanksgiving conversation was getting dull, so my sister-in-law's dog decided to take a dump right there on the floor in front of everyone. Problem solved! Oh well, at least it was a Chihuahua and not a Great Dane.
Crappy Thanksgiving to all.
Quote from: Jill F on November 28, 2014, 01:53:04 AM
Thanksgiving conversation was getting dull, so my sister-in-law's dog decided to take a dump right there on the floor in front of everyone. Problem solved! Oh well, at least it was a Chihuahua and not a Great Dane.
Crappy Thanksgiving to all.
Was this^^___^^ in the house Jill? Regardless, ew! that would have put a choke in my Thanksgiving Dinner, lol! :D
Ally ;)
Quote from: Allyda on November 28, 2014, 11:54:21 AM
Was this^^___^^ in the house Jill? Regardless, ew! that would have put a choke in my Thanksgiving Dinner, lol! :D
Ally ;)
Right on the kitchen floor during dinner!
Quote from: Jill F on November 28, 2014, 01:53:04 AM
Thanksgiving conversation was getting dull, so my sister-in-law's dog decided to take a dump right there on the floor in front of everyone. Problem solved! Oh well, at least it was a Chihuahua and not a Great Dane.
Crappy Thanksgiving to all.
I can top that. BUT I don't remember if this was a holiday or not. (But it could have been. We didn't have too many gatherings the rest of the time.) Anyways...we had this Pit Bull/Boxer mix named Butch. He was a totally awesome dog. But during this whole thing, he was barking up a storm because he needed to be let out in the backyard. Everyone kept ignoring him. I remember walking down the hallway into the living room, because his barking was screwing with my tunes on the stereo. :D (I was always in my room). But I walked in right as he hopped up on the couch, hiked his leg and whizzed all over the couch. :D :D Everyone was freaking out and my Mom tried to get him outside but it was too late by that time. They were bitching at the dog. But I had heard him barking for a least five minutes if not more than that. He only did that if he needed to be let out back. But people were having a few drinks, so they didn't bother to pay him any attention. But THAT got their attention. :D
Under the Christmas tree is a bottle of Don Julio Tequila.
The tag reads-
To: Your Liver
From: Jalisco, Mexico
I came across a video on Youtube that proposed the idea that the earth does not rotate and is in a permanently fixed position. Apparently (according to these dorks), we have been "indoctrinated" by "false sciences" into believing this and many other things.
::) Wow....just....wow.
Quote from: Jill F on December 18, 2014, 11:58:20 PM
Actually, I am the center of the universe and everything revolves around me. Would someone please make me a pie now?
Pffft! YOU WISH!!
The world revolves around her!:
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.80scartoons.co.uk%2Fget-along-gang%2Fportia-porcupine.jpg&hash=579cb73ed10f620467239f19cc3526be90cd633d)
Or...maybe it's just mine.
Quote from: Jill F on December 18, 2014, 11:58:20 PM
Quote from: Laura Squirrel on December 18, 2014, 10:11:49 PM
I came across a video on Youtube that proposed the idea that the earth does not rotate and is in a permanently fixed position. Apparently (according to these dorks), we have been "indoctrinated" by "false sciences" into believing this and many other things.
::) Wow....just....wow.
Actually, I am the center of the universe and everything revolves around me. Would someone please make me a pie now?
I have it on good authority (VM) that her iguana 'Stinky' is the Empress of the Universe and hence revolves around her :laugh:
Yes, Stinky the Iguana is the Empress of the Universe and I am her care taker 8)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MNEIByUh_zw
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=THvUXG8_rT4
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FEXaiEmw.jpg&hash=2a384c49c026a4f59f127207fefee0fd4829ffe7)
Making fun of furries, are we? Pot, meet kettle. This guy is CONSTANTLY putting on animal costumes for his bits! I think he's secretly a furry himself. :police:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SeXGoxN9B70
.......... and I still am laughing.
Took my brother and Sister-In-Law to breakfast at a local restaurant this morning, when it came time to pay the bill, the waitress asked me if it was pay back time to Mum and Dad.
I'm the same age as my SIL, and my brother is 3 years older than me. And I'm their .......... daughter?? WOW!!!
HT rocks.
Still laughing
Catherine
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FVDNJcss.jpg&hash=30c038bcba5c23322727f60339cc1c3d18cfe260)
Quote from: dalebert on January 05, 2015, 06:46:50 PM
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FVDNJcss.jpg&hash=30c038bcba5c23322727f60339cc1c3d18cfe260)
LOL... Good one :laugh:
Quote from: Jera on December 20, 2014, 03:05:18 AM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MNEIByUh_zw
:D That's great.
I remember when I was in my teens, my uncle had a bird (it wasn't a parrot, though). When my cousin and I would play Slayer and Sepultura on the stereo, it would bounce up and down in his cage. (He would have one claw on that swing sort of thing that was in the cage and the other claw balanced on a part of his cage). It would also attempt to "headbang". It was hilariously awesome.
Quote from: King Malachite on January 26, 2014, 01:39:44 PM
So at church I was with my "cousin" and her two young kids and the little boy grabbed the hand of his baby sister, helpd her on a steep step and lead her to steps of the church door. My cousin said that it looked like they were getting married and suddenly the brother let go of her sister's hand and ran away from her. I told my cousin "and that is what usually happens...." She laughed and said yup. -sigh-
Hopefully the little girl will find someone who will never let go of her hand and leave her all of a sudden. :D
Thinking about this from a while ago, lol.
I saw this heading in my Spam folder: "Blow her away with your huge weapon!" :D :D Ummmm.....no.
Quote from: Laura Squirrel on January 06, 2015, 03:10:58 PM
I saw this heading in my Spam folder: "Blow her away with your huge weapon!" :D :D Ummmm.....no.
LOL... I got that one also, nearly laughed myself silly :laugh:
Quote from: dalebert on January 05, 2015, 06:46:50 PM
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FVDNJcss.jpg&hash=30c038bcba5c23322727f60339cc1c3d18cfe260)
So true, lol!
I bought some food from Chipotle and I was getting ready to pay for my chicken bowl.
The dude who was packing up my food (it was to go) was like "Anything else, ma'am?"
I replied "No, that's all."
And I figured he realized his mistake with calling me ma'am because his face was priceless. I was so close to laughing. XD
He blinked a few times, mouth formed an O shape and he didn't say anything after that. (which is strange cause he talked alot with the customers before me)
I guess I have to speak in order to get gendered correctly. Curse this youthful face!
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.pleated-jeans.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2013%2F01%2FScreen-shot-2013-01-14-at-8.48.22-AM.jpg&hash=1d5bc14c2b5210548e5f2f9cb16ed2c4dbf3087c)
I discovered this demonic monstrosity when I saw how dusty the bottom of my computer chair was:
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi895.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fac158%2Fnapalmdeathfan13591%2FRandom%2520Pics%2520n%2520Stuff%2Ffc22761b-c2ed-4a6b-8aa3-3cbf44aec5ba.jpg%3Ft%3D1421024382&hash=531c8522b4bf325eca219b1317b61498bf0892e6)
It's a massive hairball that had accumulated for a really long time. :D :D I had no idea it was there, until I flipped the chair over to dust underneath the seat. I was very surprised by what I saw. :D
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2F2.media.collegehumor.cvcdn.com%2F39%2F16%2F5f9513ae6a2f51d3dda3c450eeb67229.gif&hash=a2c6ff9585b80320fedceef96eb68bc090ef636c)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.pleated-jeans.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2013%2F05%2Fhow-to-hold-your-breath-for-5-minutes11.png&hash=ec8bbecc4bef8d3598e7fa095a2fee3571f77e29)
I put on GTA: Liberty City Stories for the first time in a LONG time. Then I clicked on the "Load Game" function just to see how long it's been. I haven't played this game since 4/18/12. :D Wow That IS a long time.
A punter came in to collect on a bet he placed yesterday. He told me he saw the name and placed the bet because of me. The name of the horse
"Sheza Gypsy"
I had a very strange dream, where myself and several friends were buying plane tickets to go to some party. One friend, B., decided that he would instead smuggle himself in an industrial size can of pudding because he didn't want to pay for the ticket. He assured me I would just have to find and open the can when we landed. Long story short, the pudding was sent to a prison kitchen and it took me three days to find him. B. died a pudding-filled death.
HelenW's last post.
https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,181759.msg1611368.html#msg1611368
Quote from: Jill F on January 22, 2015, 05:03:25 PM
HelenW's last post.
https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,181759.msg1611368.html#msg1611368
Saw your rep point, two can play at that!
Quote from: dalebert on January 24, 2015, 12:26:00 PM
The kicker on a football team?
Punter = a person who gambles on sports or racing events
Quote from: dalebert on January 24, 2015, 12:26:00 PM
The kicker on a football team?
Quote from: immortal gypsy on January 24, 2015, 03:59:19 PM
Punter = a person who gambles on sports or racing events
I don't gamble, when they shoot craps, do they use a punt gun? (http://rarehistoricalphotos.com/punt-gun-used-duck-hunting-banned-depleted-stocks-wild-fowl/)
Friend said that my face is all fuzzy and that I'll look like a lumberjack soon XD
Better be careful if you want to be a lumberjack... :D
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.maplenorth.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2011%2F10%2Fim-a-lumberjack-demotivational-poster-12235703191-300x248.jpg&hash=8cae4b9d4dc13fec661d334cdb3085020cf8cc54)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FCgXOpNg.jpg&hash=67b6b744c0a858f532d087df11e200dd71929be2)
I'm pretty sure I have the runny earwax thing too.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2Fm3dEy3I.png&hash=606fabf60da633257dddd300f4d6205f4a1c64df)
http://www.facebook.com/video.php?v=10152523198102261
a late-period entry of a film series i like.
damn, i know the color ones were weird, but what does a laser cannon have to do with a normal whodunit? And why does the villain in a 60's movie out of the blue reveal she deeply wants to be a man and that that's why she goes around murdering men in something that looks a bit like a more realistic Guy Fawkes mask? I nearly did a spittake during that scene, turned over to my mother and said: "did she just?". And why are convicted female criminals masquerading as a nun's order working on a heist? And why does the head nun have a husband? And why is the Countesses son mentally handicapped in such an offensive manner? And why does a minor character out of the blue crossdress?
Ah, 60's B-Movie cinema, how great you are. But as an entry of that series, weak.
But it is quite an offensive movie. It seems to be a slap in the face to transmen and feminists at the same time with the killer's condition. You have to see it to understand why i say that.
I did genuinely enjoy the scenes with the fake nuns dressing and all scenes with Sophie Hardy in them though. Hmmmm, nice.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Tcx5ZtEyEw
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FMuGGR4l.jpg&hash=42055e6b471764ecf220798e8a35673005c60fb3)
I get 'Daily Recipe' emails and today's email is labeled 'chocolate treats extraordinaire', glancing at the first entry I thought it read 'Bipolar Brownies' but it turns out it actually reads 'Popular Brownies' :D
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All the wrong things. The fat cop in my living room and his walleyed face and his total disregard for my daughter's noise and violence and racism. I can't wait for her to not need me. I will go sleep under a bridge and freeze to death and it will be the best my life has ever been.
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The Most Popular Topic Here Right Now: The Down Time
Number of replies per day: 6
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FPYWL6qa.jpg&hash=7749c30e5b1bc2e13197d9c045575123d75fc143)
I was on my way out the door at work, when one of my colleagues who is a reporter saw me and I held the elevator for him. I hadn't seen him in a while since he's been in the field reporting on the weather and other local stuff.
First thing he said was, "growing your hair out, eh?"
I chuckled
If only he knew lol
http://imgur.com/JmdaoJe
We do love them.
my loud, obnoxious and sarcastic friend always makes me laugh.
oh, so many comments... ;D
A rather rude, conceited lady's little dog barfed on her shoes 8) It was funny as hell, but now I feel kinda bad about laughing about it even though she's been rather rude to me on various occasion
Quote from: V M on February 11, 2015, 09:54:25 PM
A rather rude, conceited lady's little dog barfed on her shoes 8) It was funny as hell, but now I feel kinda bad about laughing about it even though she's been rather rude to me on various occasion
reading this ^^^
on another note my 17 month old dancing to death metal wiggling her little hips then stopping dead looking very serious and just said no and sat down till i changed the music, it was cute and funny :)
The triumphant return of the ass-vatar!
Dumb jokes on ->-bleeped-<-. I can't find what, but I remember trying to stifle it because I was laughing at stupid stuff. :D
Quote from: Felix on February 21, 2015, 02:49:31 AM
Dumb jokes on ->-bleeped-<-. I can't find what, but I remember trying to stifle it because I was laughing at stupid stuff. :D
Can relate.
Saw a headline today
Upset at the cricket world cup.
England wins!
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FMHjszmY.jpg&hash=27c5f5dd395f666c0e88d8e2cfcae5250d2ca663)
Quote from: dalebert on February 23, 2015, 08:34:09 PM
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FMHjszmY.jpg&hash=27c5f5dd395f666c0e88d8e2cfcae5250d2ca663)
classy. 8)
what made me laugh today was my life 'cause it's a joke.
just kidding. actually, what made me laugh today was the fact that my english teacher is so easily distracted that we essentially end up having a class discussion about totally unrelated topics instead of reading or writing or something you're supposed to do in english.
Quote from: infinity on February 23, 2015, 08:47:18 PM
classy. 8) what made me laugh today was the fact that my english teacher is so easily distracted that we essentially end up having a class discussion about totally unrelated topics instead of reading or writing or something you're supposed to do in english.
LOL... I had some teachers like that in school :D
What made me laugh is how many people at my apt.s goof up their televisions because they don't understand how the cable box relates to their TVs
So guess who they come to and ask to reset it for them? Oh well, just one of various simple repairs I do
I know that there is a degree of latency before the TV comes back on so I'll say "Abracadabra kapoof"
They feel better and think I'm some sort of genius magician LOL
Quote from: V M on February 23, 2015, 11:07:43 PM
They feel better and think I'm some sort of genius magician LOL
You mean your not?!?
Some fool has made a FB page using my ex-male name and a fake pic!
What a loser :laugh: :laugh:
The tagline: "The future is here!"
https://www.facebook.com/video.php?v=1159100490779675
Quote from: Cindy on February 24, 2015, 01:25:33 AM
Some fool has made a FB page using my ex-male name and a fake pic!
What a loser [emoji23] [emoji23]
To what purpose?
Quote from: Cindy on February 24, 2015, 01:25:33 AM
Some fool has made a FB page using my ex-male name and a fake pic!
What a loser :laugh: :laugh:
What the hecks is up with that kind of nutter stuff?
I just got a letter offer about some nonsense pills that help to maintain testosterone levels. xD
"No thanks, I got something better already."
I met an eleven year old transgirl today who responded to boys at school calling her 'barbie boy' by telling her mother that they're stupid, because she doesn't even like barbies, she likes bratz. Also, the amount of sass that girl has as she rolls hers eyes is terrifyingly impressive.
Quote from: Tripdistrans on February 25, 2015, 06:06:47 AM
I met an eleven year old transgirl today who responded to boys at school calling her 'barbie boy' by telling her mother that they're stupid, because she doesn't even like barbies, she likes bratz. Also, the amount of sass that girl has as she rolls hers eyes is terrifyingly impressive.
I read that rolling your eyes can make you more creative. If that's true, teenage girls must be the most creative people in the world!
Quote from: ChiGirl on February 25, 2015, 07:27:50 AM
I read that rolling your eyes can make you more creative. If that's true, teenage girls must be the most creative people in the world!
I must say the way that some teenage girls get boys to like them is very, VERY creative indeed. Not always successful, however..
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kJkT7OAdGt0
my sister making tea: "oh, the water's burning!"
;D
Today, I received a letter from my provincial health plan with a letter: Dear Nina xxxxx. As you are over 50, we invite you to a cervix screening.
Got this letter after I had finally changed my gender marker on my government health plan.
Lol
Quote from: infinity on February 25, 2015, 07:23:16 PM
my sister making tea: "oh, the water's burning!"
;D
I'd would've swore that my daughter was the only one who could actually do that.
This, excuse the bad language
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rc_o0mOf3PM (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rc_o0mOf3PM)
It's called "Rage Quit Rage Quit" so in case that isn't enough to clue you in, it is FULL of foul language! I was laughing so hard, I could hardly breathe.
NSFW
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-IknrcBpm9k
Quote from: dalebert on February 27, 2015, 07:31:59 AM
It's called "Rage Quit Rage Quit" so in case that isn't enough to clue you in, it is FULL of foul language! I was laughing so hard, I could hardly breathe.
NSFW
...
Classic! And speaking of classic...
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=LkCNJRfSZBU
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FD57l39d.jpg&hash=6b17d04b4bce8a211be55a88944d4ea70daa0f3d)
Yep!
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2F4cseaoj.png&hash=885e05e57696af6d376d4f6880f85f33f1128a50)
A "friend" (acquaintance) posted on fb about "stupid <political leaning people>" and how they want to make kids queer and stuff by allowing boys to wear dresses if they want.
Evolved into a whole cyber bar brawl about transsexualism and its etiology. One of the people in the thread said, "no you have a penis or a vagina, end of story!"
Debate of this kind is child's play. I responded with, "Transgender people have had brain scans and their brains have been shown to be that of their affirmed gender, for example a male to female has shown to have a female brain. A little thing called science, you know."
Finally one of the guys in the the thread said, "Well, R, science also said you evolved from a monkey.. Now by all means you might have but I know I sure didn't"
At that point I knew what I was dealing with and with a chuckle, I just said goodnight...
I can be a bit of a snark at times. Ignorance makes me sad but it occasionally makes me laugh.
I really do need to dump facebook for good.
I just simply unfriend and/or block those type of people. Once they start saying religion trumps science, then you realize that they are just delusional and unwilling to think for themselves. They are reason why dogma exists in religion to begin with.
I really don't put anything useful on FB anymore and I've stopped friending people. My account is deprecated for all intents and purposes.
Doesn't stop me from having a little fun sometimes though.
My cat staring at me while he humps his teddy bear. He purrs and tries to maintain eye contact and it's so disturbing I can't help but laugh. :laugh:
I accidentally hit on an old man in drive through..
The amount of times it took to take my new drivers license photo today. Because I had to take my glasses off the room was too bright for my eyes I kept blinking it only took us 4 attempts for her to get the photo taken. We both had a chuckle when I came back to the counter about the time it took
This is one license I'm both dreading (the picture) and excited (addressed to Ms) in getting.
Quote from: Tripdistrans on March 04, 2015, 02:07:16 AM
I accidentally hit on an old man in drive through..
What happened?
Well, it's pretty obvious that I don't always pass and sometimes that makes me kinda sad :-\
So anyway this gal I'd met awhile back was stumbling about with the "Let's just be friends" bit
I guess she was expecting to be all sad about it because she seemed a bit taken aback and disappointed when I was all like -
"Right on, cool, I was thinking the same thing, I'm just glad you brought it up first because I was kind of afraid to"
I didn't mean to blow her ego but I really just don't have much time for all that "high school" romance drama stuff anymore
Anyhow, it was all like situation comedy material to me :D
Quote from: Tripdistrans on March 04, 2015, 02:07:16 AM
I accidentally hit on an old man in drive through..
It's okay. I was quite flattered. ;)
*possible trigger warning*
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a55D9PZ3HX8
Quote from: King Malachite on March 11, 2015, 12:01:47 PM
*possible trigger warning*
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a55D9PZ3HX8
That lady needs help before she has a stroke;)
Sounds like somebody needs to get laid...
Hahahahahaha!!!!
I feel guilty for laughing at this.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FKCkxUnJ.jpg&hash=9ffc4cb76d100b0702b647d31bbda7066b4fc63d)
As a Caribbean gal, I totally get this. And yes, I get it too even though I am not white... only a few countries have Indian people (Trinidad, Guyana and to a lesser extent, Jamaica.) But I had a good few white friends, mostly from school.
Some things white people from the caribbean are tired of hearing:
http://www.buzzfeed.com/trinidan29/some-things-white-people-from-the-caribbean-are-ti-xbkv#.ms730QRlv
This picture plus a lot of the rest of the article that it's from. All through my childhood and young adult life, I could not enter a library without suddenly needing to go to the bathroom! (#3)
18 Things You Probably Didn't Know About Poop
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2Fr33q5wu.jpg&hash=ed0551fa7c297f515b7cc2df359629417c1f7635) (http://io9.com/18-things-you-probably-didnt-know-about-poop-1619491887)
Kids, don't try this at home! There are a couple wirty dords at the end so NSFW.
Couch surfing!
https://www.facebook.com/video.php?v=909819389080697
Ultra Spiritual Life
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FLwyeMnx.png&hash=d1fb09a1d8ef87079f8c755f0250b5728ff9a577) (https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLVqOKx7e2qhefIG5IEGOKQ4pCzFf8IScX)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FbwcjkFz.jpg&hash=708d558488512a35828feb567b16d019934c8c4a)
I wish this was the boys section when I was one.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi1188.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fz403%2Frjairam%2F52CDE2A1-EDE4-482B-B930-DB6CF8393E6E_zpsoaqnyc2w.jpg&hash=87b9e41e91fc4e41198b1190acdefbc7b76087bd) (http://s1188.photobucket.com/user/rjairam/media/52CDE2A1-EDE4-482B-B930-DB6CF8393E6E_zpsoaqnyc2w.jpg.html)
Yes this is an actual Walmart I'm browsing right now.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nLkQeuU1LmM&list=LL4XKOg5COGzcjea2NHp8Uvg&index=52
Saw a what's happening in a local nightspot - instead of an air guitar contest, they would be holding an "Air Sex Contest." Don't even want to think about it. Maybe I'm just too old.
A little NSFW due to butt stuff.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CvvgdXKrd7g
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AWhlZr5UcSQ
Even as a Christian myself, I find their response hilarious.
http://www.explodingkittens.com/cat_whiskey.html
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FuNrmXno.jpg&hash=e26f0b616eaef4981d27c12097561633a7e56a7b)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O_FArdFIXfk
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This.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fyeTJVU4wVo
It's actually been quite awhile ago but still makes me chuckle a bit whenever I think of it - My mom and I had a long standing disagreement as to who was more BADASS - Clint Eastwood or John Wayne
Clint Eastwood!
Oh it wasn't up for a vote.
Quote from: dalebert on April 08, 2015, 08:00:30 PM
http://www.explodingkittens.com/cat_whiskey.html
...
but, I drank it! Honest!
Touche, madam!
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More like a few days ago, but I still want to share this.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fmugstoria.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2015%2F03%2Fwikipedia-isis.png&hash=0ca63006fa86561ddf994035d114dde72e13482b)
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Quote from: Kimberley Beauregard on May 11, 2015, 02:41:29 PM
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Well, obviously. Just look at him! ;D ;)
Allhu Mal-Akhbar!
That reminds me of a few days ago when the wrestling community rejoiced when Sami Zayn (formerly El Generico) made his debut on Monday night RAW. "Sami Zayn" was trending on Twitter, and the directioners thought it was about him.
Quote from: WildThing on May 13, 2015, 04:27:47 AM
(formerly El Generico)
That name alone makes me laugh.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hmWpXmBcsL0
I watched the office (american ver.) today.. It made me laugh though the awkwardness made me cringe a lot too lol
Overhearing someone telling his friend that the last time he was in Blackpool he took part in a 30 man brawl inside a mud wrestling bar,hooked up with 2 sisters and was so drunk he peed the bed.The best bit was when he said Blackpool's gone really rough now and today it's only for scrotes!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FesQuZ2XQXY
I was startled by a sudden hail storm :D
My wife was going through some old playlists in her iTunes and came across this beauty :)
"Weird Al" Yankovic - Virus Alert (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zvfD5rnkTws)
"Weird Al" Yankovic - Virus Alert
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DipuKXvtcsw
It shouldn't make me laugh but just the idea of not getting beat up and yelled at all the time by a child seems so unlikely that the absurdity brings me joy. Like lol some people don't fear cops or spit out bits of teeth after refusing to let their kids eat 3+ pickles.
Somewhere out there is a world that has people who are allowed to make mistakes. I'm positive not everybody lives in terror of what inevitabilities come from screaming + biting + sunshine and noise and whatever. These public summer festivals are destroying us and I know one day everything will either go to absolute hell or it will all be okay.
I'm a monster.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zs7xO5P3Az4
I felt silly today. And stepped closer to old womanhood. I bought my first pair of Crocs.
They scream cute
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FCiIgM5q.jpg&hash=fd82054b87d824be2d3d130a115530e7d67bccf5)
Giving my mom my least favorite wave bottle.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bzEq2fnyVDY
A video that some goofy cornball posted on Youtube called: "Bruce Jenner's Transformation is Illuminati Goddess Ritual". Then, someone in the comments said something about "the elite multi millionaires are funding the ->-bleeped-<-s."
Umm.....what??
Seriously?
I would love for someone to do that. LOL All they would need to do is just give me enough money to complete my electrolysis by this one tech out of town. That's all.
THAT'S A BARGAIN!! :D
I don't know why people believe this crap.
Went into the city today and walking along and saw a woman walk straight into a bike courier knowing them both down quite hard.
Ok this was not funny as the cyclist was not at fault for once.
The woman crossed the main street while looking at her phone and walked straight in front of the cyclists.
She apologised profoundly then picked up he pink phone and continued looking at her phone as if nothing happened.
WTF?
Confronted her and she still had no idea.
That's when I laughed.
OMG what is she thinking? She could have been killed yet her phone is more important than her life?
Unfortunately too many people have been brainwashed into being addicted to their phones.
Some can't go 5 minutes without their phone.
So how many have dropped their phone in the toilet? Yuck seriously. ???
We live in a age of zombies, techno zombies.
I shake my head at the stupidity of these people.
Luckily no one was seriously hurt but that's not the point.
Watching old episodes of Whose Line Is It Anyway?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zi15aohEZY0
My wife and I made spaghetti and meatballs the other day. Her text to me today:
"Freeze sauce and balls."
My reply?
"It's a bit late for that."
The Geico scapegoat commercial has been make me laugh for quite awhile
How could I not?
I will burn I am sure. :icon_flamed:
40 signs that you're from Adelaide
http://www.news.com.au/travel/australian-holidays/signs-youre-from-adelaide/story-e6frfqa0-1227421344355 (http://www.news.com.au/travel/australian-holidays/signs-youre-from-adelaide/story-e6frfqa0-1227421344355)
I'VE lived in Adelaide pretty much my whole life. Except for those six years when I travelled around the country for my radio career.
I'm not going to lie, I did love my time living on the Sunshine Coast and in Melbourne, but Adelaide is my home; it will always have my heart.
And ... because only someone who grew up in Adelaide would understand the following:
1. You've almost died on the Britannia Roundabout. Multiple times.
2. You've never posed for a photo with the Malls Balls. But you have with the brass pigs outside the Myer Centre.
3. You've said, "How small is Adelaide!" about 20 thousand times, but you hate when someone from interstate says it.
Quote from: Jenny07 on June 30, 2015, 04:16:17 AM
How could I not?
I will burn I am sure. :icon_flamed:
40 signs that you're from Adelaide
http://www.news.com.au/travel/australian-holidays/signs-youre-from-adelaide/story-e6frfqa0-1227421344355 (http://www.news.com.au/travel/australian-holidays/signs-youre-from-adelaide/story-e6frfqa0-1227421344355)
I'VE lived in Adelaide pretty much my whole life. Except for those six years when I travelled around the country for my radio career.
I'm not going to lie, I did love my time living on the Sunshine Coast and in Melbourne, but Adelaide is my home; it will always have my heart.
And ... because only someone who grew up in Adelaide would understand the following:
1. You've almost died on the Britannia Roundabout. Multiple times.
2. You've never posed for a photo with the Malls Balls. But you have with the brass pigs outside the Myer Centre.
3. You've said, "How small is Adelaide!" about 20 thousand times, but you hate when someone from interstate says it.
Let's see, I have some whips, a few branding irons, and oh yes, a whipping frame. I'll just call QUANTAS for a ticket
:laugh:
Its a beautiful place for sure, and it has the heart of some of Australia's most successful exports close by; in the Barossa and Clare valley's
For me that makes it even more special.
Katy xx
Oh God, this is just glorious! Hint: look at the taskbar in each photo.
http://www.cracked.com/blog/a-review-pirated-copy-windows-7-i-bought-ebay/
Silly stuff at my apt.s complex ::)
One of the nicer elderly ladies brought a fan out to the lobby the other day, both to share with everyone but also because she likes to sit out there to visit with others and watch one of her favorite game shows
So one of the newer tenants asked to borrow it, he could have been a bit more honest though
Rather than telling her that it was hot in his apt. and he wanted to borrow it until he could buy his own, he tells her he wants to dry his floor because he'd just mopped it
Several hours go by and he doesn't return it and then he comes wondering out to the lobby as she's telling me about it and reiterates about drying his floor
I go to ask him about it and notice he's got it set next to his TV and pointed at his chair
Anyway he brings it back the next day but it's messed up and I had to repair it
Oh well, got it working right again and everyone's happy again LOL
Today we visited my 87 year old grandmother that lives in a assisted living home with about 50 residences where each have there own private apartment. They had their 4th of July party downstairs with hamburgers, hot dogs, for everyone including families visiting. Since I'm 6'7" I get a lot of attention and all the older women asked how tall I was. I told them and all asked if it was easy to meet guys being such a tall woman. I didn't get into details that I was there with my wife and just said that I've never had an issue. Then one woman who was about 68 (but looked good for 68) says to me: "Wow you are a tall woman. You know, it does get kind of lonely around here, it you ever want to, you know....., let me know!" I wasn't expected that one, LOL
The other funny thing is that the same woman mis-gendered my wife earlier and and my wife was also mis-gendered by someone else today. My wife's hair is short, but it's still feminine and she is a 38D. My grandmother and uncle thought it was the funniest thing, LOL.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C47Dw8dPopE&src_vid=8YeV4vAwdG0&annotation_id=c9633ef7-4a0f-47ce-960a-16bb2ca515a1&feature=cards
Met and talked with somebody that knew me before transition. He had no clue who I was and I didn't tell him.
I was driving and heard a radio ad. It kept repeating "Shuda funeral home." Remember this is radio. I kept thinking, who would want to shoot a funeral home, the people are already dead.
A Boston terrier pulling funny faces
I I wish I had a video camera :laugh:
I was planning to go to the store but then noticed that a squirrel had gotten it's head stuck in a Yoplait yogurt container and was running about the street mostly bonking it'self against the curb
(https://sp.yimg.com/ib/th?id=JN.wRiXcux0VVGENEJ2f13sgw&pid=15.1&P=0&w=300&h=300)
So I walked over as quietly as I could and waited for it to stop a moment to try to pull the container off, then I reach down and POP!!! Pulled the container off it's head
Of coarse it freaked out and run up a tree but I felt I had done my good deed for the day and definitely had gotten my ha ha's out of it :laugh:
When you're drunk and trying to get someone's attention. (http://i.imgur.com/kia20g5.gifv)
I've heard guys referring to pregnant women as watermelon smugglers and thought that was kinda rude in some way :-\
But then when I went to the store I found out that a woman had been busted for using a harness device to steal melons :laugh: I just about laughed myself silly
My grandsons smile, he is 4 months old.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wRzcOXkThlY
I guess maybe I am a half decent cook, a friend of mine told me that I could make a deep fried hash brown potato patty taste like a gourmet delicacy :laugh:
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimagecdn-2.findnsave.com%2F322%2F12796058-420&hash=2dbfeb6a32f8458666d72b8eb4faa58ad3e99633)
Had to call someone back today and I had forgotten my name
"Hi this is umm....." Thank goodness for name tags
The Max Payne 3 review introduction from the AngryJoeShow.
Introducing Upsidedown Cross to a penpal and having that penpal think that Larry Lifeless sounded like a chick. :D :D How ANYONE could think that was the case is absolutely baffling.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9cSx5Xtfzuw
Does he sound like a woman to you?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B0VXbtGrqF8
Quote from: King Malachite on March 12, 2016, 01:26:03 AM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B0VXbtGrqF8
Guilty as charged sir! <clears throat>
But you missed the kicking him for snoring :laugh:
My friends and peers are fantastic.
According to some people, we live in a pedophile culture. Apparently, the fact that men prefer women with smooth and hairless bodies and young girls happen to have smooth and hairless bodies isn't a coincidence.
Naturally, the fact that I somehow encourage pedophilia whenever I epilate is traumatising to say the least, so my friends point out the absurdity of this claim by applying the same logic to other situations. Here some examples they have devised:
Some women are attracted to bald men.
Newborns are bald.
Therefore women who find bald men attractive are uber-pedos. Sickos.
Some people find muscular men attractive.
Gorillas are muscular.
Therefore, people who are attracted to muscular men are into bestiality. Sickos.
Finally, some people are attracted to men with facial hair.
GUESS WHO ELSE FAD FACIAL HAIR??!! (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Adolf_Hitler)
Now, excuse me while I go and stick a pencil up my nose to fish out the piece of my brain that just died.
This ruins my life.
Forum drama.
Some guy on a gay dating app, on noticing that I haven't yet uploaded any profile pics, asked me if I was a 'new boy'.
My response: "Yes, quite literally" :D
a quote from another topic.
""...looks like I picked the wrong week to stop sniffing glue..."
from the movie airplane
The video of ben afflecks reaction to the batman reviews x3
This is just fantastic.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RySHDUU2juM
My iPhone was randomly shuffling through one of my old music playlists from 2012, and it started playing a slow, slightly depressing song by Depeche Mode. So I decided to hit the 'next' button to pick a more cheerful song because I wasn't in a Depeche Mode mood at the time.
The next song was by Depeche Mode. And the next one. And the one after that.
So I hit the 'next' button once again, and I said out loud: "Is there anything on this playlist that isn't by Depeche Mode?". And the very next song that came up was called... 'Nothing'.
And it's by Depeche Mode. ;D
I'm so immature at times but I was killing myself laughing after dropping some seriously evil farts in a crowded Krispy Kreme with the family.
Not very subtle but so funny to me I couldn't breathe but that's fair as neither could they lol.
Oh god I just sprayed all over my phone laughing again thinking about it.
Two things:
- On my way to a GIC appointment, I popped into a pharmacy to buy some antihistamines. Apparently these are age-restricted at this particular pharmacy, so the guy behind the counter asked me "Are you over 18?". I laughed and replied: "I'm so over 18 that I actually have an 18-year-old daughter!"
- At the GIC, my therapist & I were discussing my dating woes. She said to me: "You're a good-looking guy; I'd definitely make a pass at you!". Now that's therapeutic. ;D
Jeff Dunham videos :D
A Boston Terrier pulling a funny face. I love these dogs, if I was a responsible adult I'd have one
Quote from: Cindy on March 12, 2016, 01:49:49 AM
Guilty as charged sir! <clears throat>
But you missed the kicking him for snoring :laugh:
Hehe, I'm surprised you're
that merciful!
I had a tiny visitor tonight. A tiny toad got into my apartment. How? I have no idea. It totally took me by surprise. :D But, I got it out of the apartment and back to the courtyard from which it came. I THINK that's where it came from anyway. Probably from all of this rain we've had. I've seen them come out like crazy after it rains. But, I've never had one seek shelter in my apartment. :D
I just got done playing some video games with my best friend we always have a good laugh together.
As some of you know my wife asked for a divorce. The first night I was numb. The second day to was weepy. On the third day, yesterday, I was back and forth. On my way back from lunch I ran into my old boss, whom I had told the day before. He was drinking g a bottle of water. I nudged hi and said, "I'm gonna be single soon. Wanna ditch your girlfriend and hook up with a hot brunette?" He almost choked!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tzJTtlMACuw
My two and a half year old was playing peek-a-boo with my one year old and making him laugh. It's awesome to see them playing nicely and not hurting each-other.
Quote from: WarGrowlmon1990 on June 24, 2016, 02:13:35 PM
My two and a half year old was playing peek-a-boo with my one year old and making him laugh. It's awesome to see them playing nicely and not hurting each-other.
Haha, that's awesome!
I had no sleep last night due to checking my phone for Brexit results every 10 minutes. Fell asleep on the sofa, woke up to find my daughter had pulled 4 large bears onto me, made a make shift bed and fell asleep. =]
The ending scene with Helena Harper and her sister in Resident Evil 6 where *spoilers* the mutated Debra falls.
As I'm typing on my laptop, my two year old hides behind the laptop screen, then stands up saying "peek a boo" with the biggest smile on his face.
I finally figured out what a friend was trying to say, he was talking about getting a 32 oz bottle of beer and trying to say
'Big Kahuna' but it came out as 'cuwuama'
I said you go ahead, but I'm okay for now and wished him well - He seemed kinda disappointed by that
Oh well, some guys do some strange things sometimes
2 very drunk guys on a tandem with huge fishing rods trying to do a 3 point turn in a narrow street. The BMW driver they were holding up didn't see the funny side & I learned some new swear words!
A really bad actress and her drama scene, I've seen B-Movies that were staged better
I was zoning in back to school for four hours today (translation: I was straightening up merchandise in the area where we sell notebooks and pencils, etc. and torment children with the idea that their summer is almost over.) A lady, her daughter and her son had approached me about four times asking where things were. On the fifth and final time she told her daughter, "he's our go to guy!" I responded, "ma'am, I'm not a guy." She looked at me. "I'm a woman." Her son was standing between us. She exclaimed, "no you're not!" I stepped to the side so she could see me better, glanced pointedly down at my boobs and said "yes, I am." "Oh my G*d, I'm so sorry." Funny, but a little distressing.
Wouldn't you know it, a little later I was helping another woman and when I finished she said, "thank you, sir. You've been very helpful." I answered, "you're very welcome, but I'm not a man." She looked at me and said, "I'm so sorry, you would think I would know better! I needed laser for this beard on my face and my voice is deep. I get called a man on the phone all the time!" Her name, by the way, was Francis. We had a nice chat about laser, electrolysis and not wanting to talk for an hour or so when we get up 'cause our voices are lower.
Sometimes, even when we don't pass, we pass.
Being Halloween I figured I'd do it up for the kids, so I got out my black lights, strobe light and fog machine (the usual stuff I've used for rock shows)
Well, I've never had a fog machine set off a fire alarm before, but I guess there is a first for everything LOL
Quote from: V M on October 31, 2016, 08:38:04 PM
Being Halloween I figured I'd do it up for the kids, so I got out my black lights, strobe light and fog machine (the usual stuff I've used for rock shows)
Well, I've never had a fog machine set off a fire alarm before, but I guess there is a first for everything LOL
"What Made You Laugh Today?"
The fact that this post ^^^^ was # 1313! :laugh:
Sounds like a Cindy method of getting the hulky firefighters on the premises, though! ;D
Hugs, Devlyn
I am pre everything, but I think I have a pretty good voice. I decided to order my dinner at the Taco Bell drive-thru in my female voice. Once I pulled around I dropped to my male voice. I didn't get the "wait what?" reaction I was going for. But I still thought it was funny.
It was fairly warm out for this time of year when I went to the store today so I just put on a tank top and coat but took a sweater along in my back pack just in case
Well, when I came out of the store it had gone cold out so I took my coat off to put my sweater on
Oh my but there must've been a gawker's union in town ::) I think some people may have gone blind, cross eyed and/or crazy
Two things made me laugh today, first was this video my wife posted on Facebook
Pen Pinapple Apple Pen
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vJSBc8RiSCE (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vJSBc8RiSCE)
(Ryuk Death Note Version)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1W3sslyiUfg (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1W3sslyiUfg)
(Original)
and the second was this video my cousin posted this one
Bathroom Stall (non-trans related)
(Warning if you laugh at this you might be going to hell, but at least your be in good company)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nfsgEF-rQgU (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nfsgEF-rQgU)
(Guy pulls a TRUMP)
Something I haven't done in years, crashed a birthday pizza party >:-) It was bit awkward at first, I had to play a chaperoning adult rather than a party guest this time
Had a great time though, insulted their weak tasting over sugared bowl of punch, had pizza and told a bunch of young uni students to have a great time but to be careful and not get themselves in any trouble
Aguilah, my Asian Fairy-bluebird trying to swallow my fingers while I'm typing on the computer.
First, he tries to "kill" them with his very sharp beak (OUCH!), then he tries valiantly to pull chunks off my hand.
Then he tries to gulp down my finger tips.
I'm usually shaking with silent laughter by this time, but it does makes me feel sorry for the meal worms I feed him.
Quote from: Raell on December 07, 2016, 02:41:39 AM
Aguilah, my Asian Fairy-bluebird trying to swallow my fingers while I'm typing on the computer.
I just looked them up. Pretty bird! Do you have a male or a female?
Sent from my Pixel using Tapatalk
Thanks! He's a wild-caught male, and one of the two target bird species that inspired me to move to Thailand, since I'm a bird photographer.
He thinks I'm his mate, sings to me, flies around following me around the apartment, sleeps next to me when I take a nap, takes meal worms from my fingers, tries to "help" me sew by trying to swallow my straight pins, seam ripper, etc. I have to keep them out of sight if not actually using them.
He loves watching movies with me on my 32" flat screen smart TV-even asking for certain shows, singing and warbling excitedly during exciting car/plane chases. I can "think" to him when it's time to fly back into his cage.
https://www.flickr.com/photos/129414978@N04/30806857641/in/dateposted-public/
Wow!!! That's a cool looking bird Raell 8)
Thanks! I feel like I'm living a dream.
I used to sit in the huge Louisville Zoo aviary and look at the male Asian Fairy-Bluebird, Imperial Pigeon, and jacanas, dreaming about photographing them in the wild.
Not only did I do so, I now own my favorite of those species. Or, rather, seem to be the "mate" of one.
He was very wild when I bought him, so when he does funny things like trying to "kill" and swallow my finger tips I feel flattered, and hold still to allow it.
His favorite movie is Knight and Day, so sometimes when he seems quiet, I'll ask him if he wants to see that movie and he'll pop out of the cage, fly to the cabinet sit on the corner gazing up at the 32" screen, waiting patiently, even though the screen is still black, until the movie to comes on. Then he warbles, squeaks, whistles, cheers,and chatters excitedly at the continuous explosions and action.
He keeps laughter in my life..not to mention being eye candy.
As a Yorkshire lass myself, this had me laughing hysterically. ;D Most of you will probably need subtitles, hahaha.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FtRRFMo27LQ
Hilarious!
Reminds me of Mike Myers and Michael Caine in the movie Goldmember, using subtitles for British English
Naughty English - Austin Powers in Goldmember (3/5) Movie CLIP
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NIaiW1XrzxA
I decided to treat myself to a home-cooked Full English Breakfast this morning.
So I rummaged through the freezer looking for my bacon & sausages... and for some reason I couldn't find my sausage. That ticked me, and I found myself giggling over my appropriately missing sausage.
I did find it eventually though. Perhaps this is a metaphor for my life.
I've just received some spam offering a free sample of an erectile dysfunction treatment. Apparently it's guaranteed to to increase my stamina & improve my ability to have intercourse.
Yeah, right. I think my difficulties in this area are far too substantial for this poxy potion to be able to do much to help me!
A naughty Boston Terrier who ate his humans burger while he was on the phone.
People who try way too hard to act "Cool" but aren't 8)
The plastic gangster who told me he was going to put a clip through the hotel & I would be lined in chalk!
This video made me laugh!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lrWRy9BBp-c
lol I just love Ugandan Knuckles!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vFKQ7GflRkk
Video of a Boston Terrier opening a box
Has anyone ever seen the Scary Movie Movies lol? I was watching some clips of them and they are just hilarious. Anything after Scary Movie 4 is terrible though.
Uber driver made me laugh he missed where to pick me and my mom up and had to circle back... Then he kept looking back and smiling. At least he was friendly but I don't think he spoke much english
Sent from my VS501 using Tapatalk
It was at like 2am so it technically was today. But I was watching a lot of Who's Line Is It Anyways on YouTube. I love that show so much. I love improvising myself too and these guys are such inspiration to me.
Would love to join an improve group sometime.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AotN5RN884E
A friend gave me a warning just before Xmas about the perils of drink driving, as the Police were out in great numbers do breatherlyzers. Apparently he had a few drinks a few nights ago and one thing led to another and he ended up on double shots of Irish Whiskey. Obviously this was not a god idea. Basically knowing he was over the limit, he decided to leave the car at the pub where it was and took a bus home.
Sure enough about 6 miles from the pub, there was a booze bus and they were pulling all the drivers over and giving them breath tests.
Sure enough he said the police waved him through and he reached home that night without incident.
As he then said to me, this was a real surprise to him as he had never driven a bus before and he said that he is not even sure where he got the bus from.
That Gillette advert.
Ah yes, another enormous multinational for-profit corporation thinking it has business moralizing to anyone. Pathetic.