Whether it be for therapy, hormones, top surgery, hysto, bottom surgery, binding, or whatever the next step is for your transition or even for people like me, thinking about the day when you CAN transition, what keeps you motivated? What gives you that extra spark to keep going until you reach your goal?
Little things, really. I'm pretty easy to please, but a few are working out to get in better shape befor T, looking at clothing (I have everything from socks to glasses), and putting aside pocket change to save up for things I need. That's all I can think of right now, but I know there are more.
For me, I don't know if motivated describes it. I get horribly depressed. I guess - what else can I do? I go on living and each day brings the next step closer. I fill the "in the meantime" days with things that make my dysphoria better like packing, shaving, binding or playing games. I distract myself really.
How much better my life has become since I started transition.
I look at my progress in the short time since I've actively transitioned and I think "imagine how things will be in double the time from now" and I get motivated to keep my chin up and keep improving myself, keep working towards where I'd like/where I need to be. I also count out my chest surgery savings jar every month and write a little tag on the jar with the amount I've saved compared to the previous time I counted. It always makes me smile!
the thing about not wasting any time.
if you cant have top surgery before a year, then use the year to educate yourself about it, get in shape or save up the money fo the surgery so you when the year have passed is fully ready,
the worst thing you can do is just to sit back and wait, you must keep on, even when you cant do anything therest still things you can do and changes you can make.
Right now I'm more focused on getting a good job and supporting myself. I think after all of that's settled, I can focus on further transitioning. For the most part, I consider my transition complete. But I do think about bottom surgery a lot. Mostly meta and hysto. Sometimes phallo.
My motivation of bottom surgery comes from several things. Wanting to be "complete" (in my personal definition of such), health reasons for the hysto, fear of discrimination by health care workers when I'm sick/old. I also want genitals that need fewer explanations with future partners.
Creating. Whether its music, my writing, or even just cooking. I channel a lot of my pain and self-loathing into my work, especially my writing and my paintings.
And being around my boyfriend as much as humanly possible.
I seem to have a strong urge to live. Deep down, I didn't really want to die. Also, being in the in-between stage was excruciating. I did whatever I had to do to get out of that.
research makes me stay on track learning makes me focus on becoming the best version of me.
I stay motivated by changing the little things in my life. When I hit a delay getting T I went to Walmart bought a pair of swim trunks and a black t-shirt and went swimming as a man, using the male locker room. It was terrifying, but reminded me that I could control my change.
I was later able to get T, but hit a roadblock trying to set up my hysterectomy ($13k out of pocket). My solution was to splurge on a tailored suit that makes me look completely masculine for job interviews.
Whenever I get down, dysphoric or frustrated I find something I can do to remind myself who I am and what I've accomplished.
Focusing on the future and and making plans.
Hmm, for me I absolutely trashed my female body, I comfort ate and locked myself in my house (seriously) for five years, so now while I wait between appointments (up to the psychiatrist part for t! Should only need 2 appts first is on the 10th!) so to pass time I work my ass off, working out keeps me distracted and motivated, and Im happy knowing while I'm a feral beast now, by the time t kicks in I'll be able to push harder and I'll have the whole package I should have been born with :)
TLDR, I work out
I work out too. It does wonders for physical and mental health. I'm not building a lot of muscle yet but it's a start and regardless, it releases a lot of stress for me.
I'm still pre-everything. I wear a binder and packer and I'm beginning to adapt a name, but everything else, I'm scared to death of how my family will react, no matter how badly I need it. Having a network of close friends who I'm out to, who refer to me as male and accept me completely the way I am, not even acknowledging the fact that my body doesn't match - that helps more than words can say. I'm really fortunate to know such awesome people.
I vent through artwork too, helps a lot to get the emotions out when they get too violent to keep in.
By thinking about all I have to gain. Knowing I've been forced to live the wrong life, and knowing that I can't have my entire life wasted just because some people want me to be someone and something that I'm not. And believing that things will be better than I could have ever hoped for some day, when I'm living and seen as male, and this backwoods hillbilly redneck sh*thole I come from will barely be a faded memory.
Those are all really good ideas! I try to apply many of them to keep myself motivated although it does seem rough at times.
Lol I tried to answer this question yesterday and I got mawkish and tried to correct that and deleted and rewrote more than once and then just fell apart. I tried again just now and found it heading in the same direction. Explaining my motivations makes me look stupid and feel bad.
So I'll just say rainbows and kittens. I keep going for the rainbows and the kittens. :D
Doing my research, contacting doctors. Controlling my social transition in the mean time. Helping my other trans friends :) Also, reflecting on everything I have accomplished with it the last 6 months. From coming officially out, hair cut, name change, to using the men's bathroom :D Just gotta remind myself to keep my head up above the water
Little things help motivate me, remind me that I have a future. Today was a bad day -- I suffer from depression and anxiety, and everything was full-force this morning, unfortunately -- but then I was walking to class and a dude behind me goes, "Hey, guy with the blue hair! Nice hair!" :D It was a total mood boost. I wasn't binding or anything.
I'm trying for reasonable goals. Like, I know there is no way I can afford top surgery, but a breast reduction might be covered by my insurance. I'm going to set up an appointment with my doc and see if it's plausible. Right now my chest is basically impossible to bind, and I know I'd be way happier with b cups. (I'm also not sure if I actually want top surgery at all, but I do know I want bind-able boobs, hah.)
Also, weed. That definitely helps. ::)
When I first started transitioning, the little things. Being called 'sir' or 'he' would send me to the moon. Getting my binder was beautiful. Using the male bathrooms out of necessity was awkward but felt great.
Now, my motivation comes from how great transitioning has made me feel and the hope for a better life. There's still a lot I haven't experienced so maybe it's the hunger of youth and perceived freedom. Feeling 'natural' as a guy helps me a lot too.