Hi, i'm Elliot. That's my name currently anyway, and I'm 18 and live in the UK :). Yesterday I kind of hit a wall (mentally) and realized all of the times when I was younger when I thought how great it'd feel to be a girl. All of the times I thought about this, I just brushed it off and didn't really act on it (or ever talk about it).
I've known at least something has been 'different' about me since I was around 3 or 4 years old.. and it's kind of an embarrassing story that can wait until later ^^. I've occasionally thought about how I want to be a girl since I was around 11-12, but only last night did I realise this is actually what I want and need.
Ever since I started school I've always gotten along with girls better than boys, although I was really shy in school - and through high school this developed into full blown anxiety which i've been seeing a therapist for, for about a year now. Before yesterday I always thought my anxiety and shyness was because others out-shined me in lots of ways, but I've only now come to realize that I never 'fit in with the boys' or really felt on the same emotional level as them - I was just hanging around the wrong people.
I've never felt good about being male, really. I've wished I was born the opposite sex many many times but knew it would never happen. Additionally, I love girls clothes (I don't cross-dress (yet)) and i've always been pretty jealous of them. If you gave me an offer of magically turning me female overnight I wouldn't hesitate to say yes :D.
Right now I can't even begin to imagine coming out to family, though i've been thinking of possibly telling my therapist about this.. the whole idea of even thinking about being myself for once is thrilling but also i'm incredibly nervous :laugh:
I never thought I would find myself as a part of this community but right now i'm really happy to be a member :)
Hello and welcome from one of the Aussie contingent.
There are girls and guys from all over, and all ages here. I am sure you will be quite comfortable here, there are a fair few Poms here, none of them of the wingeing variety either. ;) Having a therapist to discuss these issues already is a great start.
Karen.
hi Zalaiya,
Another of the Aussie girls popping past to say hi and welcome.. Your story sounds quite similar to me, just took me longer to accept what I'd known about myself all along.. Silly me..
Hugs,
Kelly
Hi Elliot, it's nice to meet you! I live near Boston. We're glad you're part of our community now. See you around, hugs, Devlyn
Welcome here, Elliot! :D
Hi Zalaiya :).
The story you told sounds so similar to mine.
See you around :).
Heya, a similar thing happened to me too. One day, everything just seemed to 'click' into place, memories and dreams from childhood suddenly made sense and i knew what I wanted.
Does your therapist have experience in this field? If (s)he doesn't then you may have to find a gender therapist, although I suppose your current one does have the advantage of knowing you.
Just take one step at a time. Even if you get on hormones soon, they arent magical beans that will suddenly change you into a woman. Its still a long journey so keep positive and happy.
Anyway, all the best and keep us updated :)
X
Hi Zalaiya :icon_wave:
Welcome to Susan's :) Nice to have you here
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Hugs
V M
Hi welcome to Susans! :)
Hi Zalaiya, :icon_wave:
Welcome to our little family. Over 6696 strong. That would be one heck of a family reunion.
Feel free to post your successes/failures, Hopes/dreams. Ask questions and seek answers. Give and receive advice.
But remember we are family here, your family now. And it is always nice to have another sister. (https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fsmileys.on-my-web.com%2Frepository%2FAnimals%2Fferret-3.gif&hash=f49e2f86761323f2abd9c33941920389dbb3b10f)
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Janet
Well I can't believe what I just did.. I came out to my mum after a long time trying to get her to take a hint. I couldn't spit it out and eventually she said something along the lines of "Uhm.. do you have Dysmorphia?"
Obviously I don't have dysmorphia but I said the word was really close.. she got out a dictionary then stopped for a second, and asked "Do you want to be a girl?" Aaaaand then I totally broke down and admitted it.
I'm really really lucky because my mum is a Lesbian.. so she kinda has some sort of empathy, I guess. I'm a tiny bit relieved but at the same time I feel pretty embarrassed.. maybe because it's so early. I'm very bad at keeping secrets, as it turns out :/
Anyway.. she asked me a few questions and then she said I should feel proud.. huge anti-climax now. I will keep you guys updated on what happens later.. at least I think i've got over one hard part.
Hon, that's great news! Your Mom is great, and you are, too! One tiny problem though. The Aussies will be warming up the "New member shared a great story with us" branding iron. \ou gotta take the good with the bad! Hugs, Devlyn
Welcome to Susan's. Sounds exciting so far. :)
Guess who has the branding iron >:-)
Hi Zalaiya,
Welcome from yet another Aussie, I live in South Australia in Adelaide the same as Kelly.
Congrats on coming out to your Mum and terrific she has taken it so well.
I always think it is cute when that happens to buy some flowers for her and address them from her new daughter .
Hugs Honey
Cindy