Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Transgender talk => Topic started by: Keri Allison on April 22, 2012, 09:54:56 PM

Title: Should I tell my roommate I have a crush on him?
Post by: Keri Allison on April 22, 2012, 09:54:56 PM
I'm a mtf transgender (no one can tell; I look, act like a guy) with three roommates:
1) The Dumb One
2) The Immature One
3) The Father Figure

I really don't like the Immature One because he constantly annoys me and makes fun of me due to my race and sexual orientation. He also makes fun of the dumb one as well, who's his main target. He yells out of nowhere to scare us.

The Dumb One is the guy I like to talk to, mainly because he's friendly and approachable. And also because I pity him. Also, both the Dumb One and the Immature One knows I'm transgender.

On the other hand, I have a slight crush on the Father Figure. He's completely straight, but doesn't know that I'm transgender or bisexual. He's often very respectful and I feel really comfortable whenever he's around. Whenever he comes in the room completely drunk I legitimately become concerned and I ask if he's okay and I try to help him out. I think he's totally adorable.. but we don't really talk at all. He considers me "uncool" or whatever (he never said it, I can tell he thinks that).

Anyways, do you think I should tell him? I'm transferring to another school anyway...

He's from a conservative part of New York, but he's a liberal.
Title: Re: Should I tell my roommate I have a crush on him?
Post by: Felix on April 22, 2012, 10:39:26 PM
I wouldn't because then he might become uncomfortable and you wouldn't be able to spend as much time around him.
Title: Re: Should I tell my roommate I have a crush on him?
Post by: Annah on April 22, 2012, 10:51:31 PM
golden rule of roommates: don't get into a relationship with one
Title: Re: Should I tell my roommate I have a crush on him?
Post by: Felix on April 23, 2012, 12:06:48 AM
Quote from: Annah on April 22, 2012, 10:51:31 PM
golden rule of roommates: don't get into a relationship with one
I'm about to make a roommate of an ex. Any golden rules regarding that?

He's straight and I'm, um, not straight, so I'm assuming it'll be okay. Since transition we haven't really had tension.

I think transpeople tend to have circumstances that make rules confusing.
Title: Re: Should I tell my roommate I have a crush on him?
Post by: Jamie D on April 23, 2012, 12:34:59 AM
Quote from: Annah on April 22, 2012, 10:51:31 PM
golden rule of roommates: don't get into a relationship with one

Platinum
Title: Re: Should I tell my roommate I have a crush on him?
Post by: Felix on April 23, 2012, 12:40:38 AM
Quote from: Jamie D on April 23, 2012, 12:34:59 AM
Platinum
Platinum is higher than gold, right?

I hope titanium's in there somewhere. :)
Title: Re: Should I tell my roommate I have a crush on him?
Post by: Jamie D on April 23, 2012, 12:53:57 AM
Quote from: Felix on April 23, 2012, 12:40:38 AM
Platinum is higher than gold, right?

I hope titanium's in there somewhere. :)

Right.

Next to gold on the periodic table. Slightly lower atomic weight. Scarcer
Title: Re: Should I tell my roommate I have a crush on him?
Post by: Keri Allison on April 23, 2012, 01:22:58 AM
Quote from: Jamie D on April 23, 2012, 12:53:57 AM
Right.

Next to gold on the periodic table. Slightly lower atomic weight. Scarcer

Haha, you're too funny!
Title: Re: Should I tell my roommate I have a crush on him?
Post by: justmeinoz on April 23, 2012, 01:39:10 AM
Maybe leave him a letter the day you transfer, or write after,  telling him what is going on, and how you feel about him.   That way he can contact you from a distance, without any stress or expectations. 

Karen.
Title: Re: Should I tell my roommate I have a crush on him?
Post by: MiaOhMya! on April 23, 2012, 01:56:27 AM
Quote from: Annah on April 22, 2012, 10:51:31 PM
golden rule of roommates: don't get into a relationship with one

Seriously, THAT!    :)

Besides, if he is as straight as you say it's not as if he'll be attracted...and if he is gay then he will be attracted to you for being male, which probably wouldn't work for you anyway.
Title: Re: Should I tell my roommate I have a crush on him?
Post by: Felix on April 23, 2012, 02:56:03 AM
Quote from: justmeinoz on April 23, 2012, 01:39:10 AM
Maybe leave him a letter the day you transfer, or write after,  telling him what is going on, and how you feel about him.   That way he can contact you from a distance, without any stress or expectations. 

Karen.
He may not contact, but I bet it would be good to tell him anyway. For her sake.
Title: Re: Should I tell my roommate I have a crush on him?
Post by: JoanneB on April 23, 2012, 05:06:28 PM
Telling him sounds like a recipe for disaster while you are still roomies.

No way would I assume "he doesn't know". If the other room-mates do then likely half the school does by now.  :-X
Title: Re: Should I tell my roommate I have a crush on him?
Post by: Keri Allison on April 23, 2012, 08:21:12 PM
Wow, the "Father Figure" treat me like ->-bleeped-<- today. **** him.
Title: Re: Should I tell my roommate I have a crush on him?
Post by: Keri Allison on April 23, 2012, 08:22:23 PM
Quote from: JoanneB on April 23, 2012, 05:06:28 PM
Telling him sounds like a recipe for disaster while you are still roomies.

No way would I assume "he doesn't know". If the other room-mates do then likely half the school does by now.  :-X

My entire fraternity knows, and all my friends know. It's not a big secret at all.