Well I am a verry confused biological male looking for help. I am not sure if I am a gay guy a strait transgender girl, or anywhere in between. I know I like women, but I don't know if it is because I want to be one or want to be with one or both. I just came here after reading some posts because I feel like if I don't say something to someone I am going to explode. I just can't figure any of it out, and I don't know how to talk to my parents or friends. Oh well I guess that's about if for a intro. I hope to talk with some of you in the future.
Hi Bookworm :icon_wave:
Welcome to Susan's :) Glad to have you here, You'll find lots of wonderful folks to talk to here while you sort out your feelings
Please be sure to review
- Site Terms of Service and rules to live by (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,2.0.html)
- Standard Terms and Definitions (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,54369.0.html)
- Post Ranks ( including when you can upload an avatar/post links and photos) (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,114.0.html.)
- Age and the Forum (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,62197.msg405545.html#msg405545)
- Reputation rules (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,18960.0.html)
Hugs
V M
Hello and welcome. You are actually distressingly normal if you are confused because these are comlpicated issues to disentangle.
I was conflating sexuality and gender issues for a long time, and wasn't sure whether I was a bi or feminine gay guy, or transsexual. It took a complete mental collapse and total loss of self-identity to clear the decks so I could start to reconstruct in an authentic manner. A good therapist with experience in gender can help to untangle things. The main thing is that wherever you end up is totally okay. Gender and sexuality are spread out along a spectrum, and there are an infinite number of positions.
Karen.
Hi Bookworm,
Lesson one. Don't panic
Lesson two. There is nothing wrong with you, you are normal.
Lesson thee. You are not alone, we are here, you are family, we know how you feel, we have been there, we are there we will not ignore or abandon you.
So calm down, have a look around the site, including the rules in the announcement section, and start asking away.
There is no reason to be nervous and there is no reason to be hesitant. You will not be insulted and you will be accepted.
You are know part of a Family that understands.
Welcome Honey
Cindy
Welcome, bookworm. Let me amplify Cindy's Lesson #3
You are not alone. This is a diverse, tolerant, and inclusive community.
It is going to take a little time to figure things out. We're here to help while you do that.
Thank you for being welcoming. I have read other introductions and everyone was welcoming. The biggest hurdle for me was letting anyone know. I am glad I have at least made an effort on my part to let someone know. I keep reading about sexual preference and gender being different. Justmeinoz that is kind of how I feel now. I hope to get help, so I don't have a mental break down.
Hi bookworm, welcome to Susans! I am from the Boston area. Little Australia. Get busy posting and I'll see you around the site! Hugs, Devlyn
Hi Bookworm,
A big Aussie welcome to Susan's family. Sydney in particular, but that may be of no interest to you at all. Just thought I'd break the ice with that slight diversion.
I'm pleased you have taken the hardest step of all, and that's making that decision to do something about your confusion. That's more than half the job done. The rest of your life from now on is just sorting out the details. Little bit like unpacking after moving house.It appears you live out of boxes for years.
You made an interesting observation about your possible relations with women. You didn't know whether you wanted to be one, or be with one. Let me just throw in another perspective. Certain women appeal to you because of a specific aspect. Like the fashions they wear, their hair style, body shape, mannerism, or something else you identify with that you would like as a part of your makeup. Not true in all TG cases, but can be in some.
As you're not quite sure how to explain yourself to anyone, nothing unusual about that. Does your school/college/Uni have a student counselor you can start discussions with about it? With the idea of finding a counselor who understands TG issues. When you understand yourself better, you are able to tell people more confidently about your feelings and desires. Sometimes telling your parents with out this understanding, they just put it down to 'a phase' you'll grow out of. Nothing could be further from the truth.
Whatever happens, keep in touch and let us know how you are coping. But in the meantime, be safe, well and happy.
Lotsa huggs
Catherine
Hi Bookworm, :icon_wave:
Welcome to our little family. Over 7581 strong. That would be one heck of a family reunion.
Feel free to post your successes/failures, Hopes/dreams. Ask questions and seek answers. Give and receive advice.
But remember we are family here, your family now. And it is always nice to have another sister. (https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fsmileys.on-my-web.com%2Frepository%2FAnimals%2Fferret-3.gif&hash=f49e2f86761323f2abd9c33941920389dbb3b10f)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fsmileys.on-my-web.com%2Frepository%2FAnimals%2Fferret-5.gif&hash=cfc7a68438be4575d8493dfbe65d1b3586f10b81)
Janet (https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fupload.wikimedia.org%2Fwikipedia%2Fcommons%2F3%2F32%2FPentacle_1.svg&hash=99e763d33bc5c4d79014cb34bf6acb3dfec8befb)