It has been over a year since I started T. I started at 1/2 a "normal" dose and have gone up to 3/4 and then to 7/8. The last increase I had was a month ago and since then I've gone from easily irritated to easily depressed. I feel like it's an improvement since I'm not blowing up all over the place, but it concerns me to be falling back into depression.
I was depressed most of my late childhood through high school and only came out of it at the end before college. Now I find myself here again, though I see no cause. I'm just depressed. I am easily discouraged and little things will really put me down. I don't like being like this. I especially don't like it now since all the new people in my life know me as I've been and keep pestering me about how down I look. I really hate the pestering, I hated it before and I hate it now.
Is this because I went up? I like the tiny increase in changes from my slightly higher dose. I really think it's better to be depressed than angry, so I don't want to go back down. Should I tell my doctor? I don't want to back out on my dosing and that seems like the only option since she wasn't interested in giving me a full dose when I asked for it a month and a half ago.
Any words of advice help. Thanks.
It's possible that being clinically depressed is independent of trans issues and hormone levels, but said depression is still significantly affected by them.
I was good on hormones for nine months. Giddy, ecstatic, whatever-else-have-you, but upon switching to progesterone I have become severely depressed. I was taken off it after the first month, but the depression only got worse and has persisted since. It's possible the progesterone had nothing to do with it - I lost my job at the same time, more or less, and the manner in which that happened was very damaging to my person. It's also possible that they were both factors, as these last nine months have been more hellish than the usual fair.
I've been depressed for as long as I can remember, with the exception of those first nine months. I miss them, but I believe the two issues of hormones and lifelong depression are more separate than I might have previously thought.