Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Transsexual talk => Male to female transsexual talk (MTF) => Topic started by: mementomori on September 11, 2012, 02:45:21 AM

Title: the name Darian , its unisex but does it sound too male?
Post by: mementomori on September 11, 2012, 02:45:21 AM
i want to change my name asap because i cannot handle being called by my birthname anymore , my friends do not call me by it but work wise / formal situations etc i still have to put up with my legal name

i need a name thats unisex for now becuase if im not passing and have a exclusively female name it will be akward

i could just change my name to something else at a later date after FFS etc

but at the moment need a name that is unisex , because im finding it intolerable being called a name thats male exclusive

but does darian sounds to male ?
Title: Re: the name Darian , its unisex but does it sound too male?
Post by: Kelly J. P. on September 11, 2012, 03:06:11 AM
 I would say that, yes, Darian sounds far too 'male' to be considered a unisex name.
Title: Re: the name Darian , its unisex but does it sound too male?
Post by: mementomori on September 11, 2012, 03:14:45 AM
its soooo hard picking a name lol i dont want something generic but i also dont want something that sounds stupid 
Title: Re: the name Darian , its unisex but does it sound too male?
Post by: Adam (birkin) on September 11, 2012, 03:22:25 AM
I have only ever known "Darian" as a male name, so yeah, I think it's a bit too male.
Title: Re: the name Darian , its unisex but does it sound too male?
Post by: Carol2000 on September 11, 2012, 03:36:07 AM
Hi Daria,

You could simply drop the N in your name. I could easily have feminised my name by adding an A on the end, but decided I wanted to sever all links with my past.

Caroline
x
Title: Re: the name Darian , its unisex but does it sound too male?
Post by: Kelly J. P. on September 11, 2012, 06:01:43 AM
 Well, Jordan is a very popular unisex name for people under or around 22-ish. Kelly is also unisex (though definitely leaning towards female), as are Alex, Jessie, Taylor, and Riley.

Those are all I can think of.
Title: Re: the name Darian , its unisex but does it sound too male?
Post by: JohnnieRamona on September 11, 2012, 06:12:07 AM
Use the name you like the most. Everything else is just drama. I'm changing from Johnny to Johnnie, personally. To paraphrase Luis Guzman in Boogie Nights: "Do what you dig."
Title: Re: the name Darian , its unisex but does it sound too male?
Post by: Seyranna on September 11, 2012, 06:16:34 AM
Def male imo...Daria or Doria are much better choices...
Title: Re: the name Darian , its unisex but does it sound too male?
Post by: suzifrommd on September 11, 2012, 07:31:29 AM
I'll supply a contrary opinion. Lots of women have names that are traditionally male. If you like Darian, keep it. It's a fine name.
Title: Re: the name Darian , its unisex but does it sound too male?
Post by: JohnnieRamona on September 11, 2012, 08:26:01 AM
Quote from: agfrommd on September 11, 2012, 07:31:29 AM
I'll supply a contrary opinion. Lots of women have names that are traditionally male. If you like Darian, keep it. It's a fine name.

Yup- Like "Johnnie." It was a popular girls' name.. back in the 1950s :) I like it anyway.
Title: Re: the name Darian , its unisex but does it sound too male?
Post by: translora on September 11, 2012, 10:16:04 AM
The only Darian I know or have ever known is a beautiful seven-year-old girl.

If the name fits you, keep it.

Lora
http://translora.wordpress.com (http://translora.wordpress.com)
Title: Re: the name Darian , its unisex but does it sound too male?
Post by: Rita on September 11, 2012, 10:39:26 AM
As long as your name is not Tom, Dick, or Harry there will be no problems  ;D
Title: Re: the name Darian , its unisex but does it sound too male?
Post by: MariaMx on September 11, 2012, 10:47:12 AM
I believe Daryl Hannah's character in Wall Street was named Darien.
Title: Re: the name Darian , its unisex but does it sound too male?
Post by: Carol2000 on September 11, 2012, 11:16:02 AM
Perhaps I misunderstood. I assumed your name was Darain at the moment?

If not, how about Deryn which is a girl's name but is often mistaken for a boy's name. I used to work with a girl called Deryn who was always having to correct people's assumption that she was a boy. She frequently received letters addressed to Mr Deryn ....

Then there's Bobby, which is a very popular girl's name with male connotations.

There's Leslie (male) Lesley (female), Francis (male) Frances (female).
Title: Re: the name Darian , its unisex but does it sound too male?
Post by: A on September 11, 2012, 11:52:14 AM
If you ask me, as an outsider to the English culture, this name doesn't even sound remotely unisex; rather a male exclusive one.

But I definitely don't recommend an unisex name to begin with. Just time the name change with the moment you go full-time. Because it's a ton more awkward for someone to change their name for the heck of it and then surprise-transitions (as a "bonus", people won't see the obvious change and might not see you as a femaleright away), than for them to change it to a female name when they do transition.

And if you have doubts about your passing, do you really want to make sure you always have a chance to be called sir, to amplify people's doubts about your gender if they're present?

I don't know about you, but if I were going full-time before consistentlyy passing, I'd want my name to dispell doubts, to affirm my feminity, instead of increasing doubts and making me possibly male each time someone reads my name without my face even when I do become passable...
Title: Re: the name Darian , its unisex but does it sound too male?
Post by: Rita on September 11, 2012, 12:15:45 PM
I didn't choose my name, I kinda just inherited it.  They were talking about names and they all settled on Rita and started calling me Rita and I quite liked the name.  As well as it letting me keep my initials its great.  It is also significantly different from my past name as well.

I agree that Darian is mostly male, I have no seen a female with that name and immediately associated it as such.  Just like Bobby which is even more unisex is usually associated with a guy upon first glance of the name.

But its not my place to tell you to change it.
Title: Re: the name Darian , its unisex but does it sound too male?
Post by: Alainaluvsu on September 11, 2012, 03:38:12 PM
My middle name was Daryan ... as a boy
Title: Re: the name Darian , its unisex but does it sound too male?
Post by: Apples Mk.II on September 11, 2012, 03:48:15 PM
Can't shake Dorian (Gray) from my head when hearing it... Can't see it as unisex after that connection, sorry.
Title: Re: the name Darian , its unisex but does it sound too male?
Post by: Shawn Sunshine on September 11, 2012, 04:03:20 PM
You could always go for "Shawn"  >:-)
Title: Re: the name Darian , its unisex but does it sound too male?
Post by: A on September 11, 2012, 04:35:22 PM
This is a little off-topic, but Rita, is your name somewhat common where you are? Again, we speak French here, so it may be totally different, but it struck me, because here, Rita is -the- archetype of a very old name, for a very old aunt. There are names that are more common in one language than another, but I really wanted to ask, since it's the first time I notice a name that actually was popular here, probably 60-80 years ago, be used in the US now.
Title: Re: the name Darian , its unisex but does it sound too male?
Post by: Rita on September 11, 2012, 04:48:30 PM
Quote from: A on September 11, 2012, 04:35:22 PM
This is a little off-topic, but Rita, is your name somewhat common where you are? Again, we speak French here, so it may be totally different, but it struck me, because here, Rita is -the- archetype of a very old name, for a very old aunt. There are names that are more common in one language than another, but I really wanted to ask, since it's the first time I notice a name that actually was popular here, probably 60-80 years ago, be used in the US now.

Margarita, Or Margharet

Rita is a shorter, younger form though in my opinion.   Origins are greek, but I have seen it in its short form Rita being used in spanish cultures alot more often.

As a baby name in the US, Rita never seems to be in the top 10, but never obscure either.  Always in the middle - middle top.
Title: Re: the name Darian , its unisex but does it sound too male?
Post by: mementomori on September 11, 2012, 05:49:23 PM
apparantly Eden is unisex so that could work till while im still androgynous and not passing yet ?   
Title: Re: the name Darian , its unisex but does it sound too male?
Post by: peky on September 11, 2012, 06:18:39 PM
I think you are a "Lauren." Lauren evokes sophistication, allure, sexiness, independence yet femininity.
Title: Re: the name Darian , its unisex but does it sound too male?
Post by: UCBerkeleyPostop on September 11, 2012, 06:29:42 PM
Quote from: The Tomboy Transgirl on September 11, 2012, 06:12:07 AM
Use the name you like the most. Everything else is just drama. I'm changing from Johnny to Johnnie, personally. To paraphrase Luis Guzman in Boogie Nights: "Do what you dig."

Do what you dig, indeed, which, presumably includes being a "transgirl," a moniker that, to my perhaps over-sensitve ear resounds pejoratively.

Here are the (supposedly) hottest girl baby names:

FASTEST-RISING GIRL'S NAMES
1. Tenley
2. Harper
3. Everleigh
4. Martina
5. Sookie
6. Navi
7. Charlotte
8. Eloise
9. Lorelai
10. Ursula
11. Briella
12. Kinley
13. Tinsley
14. Mhairi
15. Leighton
16. Maelle
17. Ever
18. Kinsley
19. Lux
20. Everly
I chose a uni-sex name that many took as a male name so I regretted it but now the name is becoming more prominent in the female lexicon so maybe it will work out after all. Darian is took close to Dorian and Darren. I think it is a bad choice especially if your female voice is not that great.
Title: Re: the name Darian , its unisex but does it sound too male?
Post by: kathy bottoms on September 11, 2012, 07:45:02 PM
How about Darianne?  I have heard that adaptation of the name before. 

K
Title: Re: the name Darian , its unisex but does it sound too male?
Post by: A on September 11, 2012, 08:41:56 PM
UC is on the right track with looking at the most popular baby names. However, I would advise looking through the list of your year of birth, in your area/state/province. Or maybe a few years later, to sound younger, or something? But having a name that's super popular among children right now, as an adult, is fairly strange, trans or not. It makes people chuckle. I don't have an English example, but think of a name popular in 15-year-olds, and imagine yourself reading it in the newspaper, and then looking at the picture of a balding, grey-haired man.

I would suggest looking at the top 100, too. Going for the very most popular ones (say, the top 10?) raises another issue: you feel so, so ordinary. Over here, Kevins, Michaëls, Catherines... They've all lived the experience of having 1, 2 or even 3 homonyms in the same class. None of them described it as a very fun experience. (Funny thing, there were two guys in my class with the same first AND last names. One got a nickname, and the other was just "not-<nickname>".)

Personally, I chose a name that was really popular (reached the very top) in the late 1990s and early 2000s and still is to some extent (its rank is falling; currently below 44) but was only starting to get popular when I was born, 21 years ago, so it makes my parents look like they were somewhat avant-gardist. That wasn't most of my decision, but looking into it afterwards, I don't dislike that.

(As for the list... Yes, I'm still not used to how bad most English names sound to me. xD)

Rita: Uhm... All right. Looks like it truly is diametrally different.
Title: Re: the name Darian , its unisex but does it sound too male?
Post by: Kevin Peña on September 11, 2012, 09:04:46 PM
Choose whatever name you think sounds cool, then just tell confused people that your parents are weird.  :P

If you really are bent on a unisex name:

-Jordan
-Adrian
-Alex
-Casey
-Quinn
-Toby
-Jess
Title: Re: the name Darian , its unisex but does it sound too male?
Post by: Dana_H on September 11, 2012, 10:04:32 PM
I've been "test-driving" the name Dana for myself for it's androgynous qualities. It immediately reminds me of actresses Dana Delaney & Dana Plato and comedian Dana Carvey. Plus, it sounds somewhat like my birth name, so if someone from my past calls me by the wrong name, I can plausibly claim to have "mis-heard" it. Finally, I kind of like the sound of it.