I have been in transition for close to three years. Currently I am doing electrolysis, working on my voice and seriously researching my FFS options. Lately though I feel that I am stagnant with my transition, and I look at my self and just do not see any big changes with my transition so far and I am still not full-time yet. Here is a main reason why: When I am out in public I do not get called M'aam even by mistake when either at the coffee shop or grocery store or even at my evening classes. Of course this does not help with my self confidence, and gets me discouraged even more. I am on taking some school time off next semester to concentrate more on my transition but any advice on what else I can do to help me get past this?
-Emilee
Self confidence is everything. We need to get you headed back up the confidence stairs. Win your own confidence back first, others will follow your lead. Hugs, Devlyn
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on November 29, 2012, 07:57:35 AM
Self confidence is everything. We need to get you headed back up the confidence stairs. Win your own confidence back first, others will follow your lead. Hugs, Devlyn
it's hard to be confident when, despite all the changes for the better, I can still see the same person looking back at me in the mirror.
You're the same person, but you're moving forward. You gotta tell that hottie in the mirror the news! Hugs, Devlyn
It does seem easy to get stuck on plateaus here and there during transition. Im no pro only been on hrt for 16 months but I know it comes in waves. Confidence is key too. Surroundings are also a big thing. I live in the hood right now and I dont feel too feminine here. My style is also mostly androgynous and Im kind of a tomboy. I hate getting called "man" all the time. I mean I am quite convincing when i am dressed appropriately feminine but mostly I get people wondering what my gender is at best when im dressed in jeans. I find that a comfortable environment where you can feel happy and have your routine help you is helpful. Find friends that are encouraging. Mostly these friends arent other trans girls. From what ive found other trans ladies are either the most awesome people ever or the opposite. Most people on the site are the prior. Begin to demand people call you what you want and the proper pronoun. It is good to give them time to adjust but eventually you have to demand they do it the way you want it. If you feel good when you walk in the room then people will feel good around you.
When I feel like im lacking confidence I stay home or wear a leather jacket and blend in:)
Hi Emily,
I went through a difficult androgynous period myself. I had done everything I could do and just had to wait for the results to kick in. The misgendering or lack of validation can be frustrating. Just hang in there, as more hair gets zapped and the estrogen continues to do its work, you'll be 'ma'amed' regularly in no time.
Quote from: Forum Admin on November 29, 2012, 11:07:44 AM
Hi Emily,
I went through a difficult androgynous period myself. I had done everything I could do and just had to wait for the results to kick in. The misgendering or lack of validation can be frustrating. Just hang in there, as more hair gets zapped and the estrogen continues to do its work, you'll be 'ma'amed' regularly in no time.
How long have you been on HRT for? for me it has been close to three years. Not sure how long is before the Estrogen really ever truly kicks in? FFS will help for sure but I know I defiantly need to work on my confidence somehow?
Quote from: EmilyMI on November 29, 2012, 01:53:35 PM
Quote from: Forum Admin on November 29, 2012, 11:07:44 AM
Hi Emily,
I went through a difficult androgynous period myself. I had done everything I could do and just had to wait for the results to kick in. The misgendering or lack of validation can be frustrating. Just hang in there, as more hair gets zapped and the estrogen continues to do its work, you'll be 'ma'amed' regularly in no time.
How long have you been on HRT for? for me it has been close to three years. Not sure how long is before the Estrogen really ever truly kicks in? FFS will help for sure but I know I defiantly need to work on my confidence somehow?
It took me over 2 years to pass fully. But that's a lot in ftm years. :laugh:
T is more powerful than E, so you've probably still got a ways to go. Also, I probably started passing because I grew a chin strap. Facial hair is such a huge marker. If you're still going to an electrologist, that's probably what's holding you back.
You need that intangible something that tips you over into the female box in people's minds. It will happen all of a sudden one day and you won't know why.