Hi everyone.
Hi Mindy, :icon_wave:
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Hi Mindy, welcome to Susan's Place! Glad you found us. Get busy making friends and I'll see you around the site. Hugs, Devlyn
Mindy, I just want to sat "Welcome from southern California."
Your story is not really too unusual. A lot of us compensated for our feelings by trying to "amplify" our birth characteristics. You did it through lifting. Others join the military. Some, like myself, convince ourselves we can get past those thoughts, marry, have families, etc. It is my experience that the dysphoria never really goes away, even when you don't know or understand what dysphoria is.
I hope your skype chat went well.
Hi Mindy,
Hating to frighten you. You sound totally normal to me.
Ok , Getting FFS done first many woman do, I've a tendency to go the other way (see what hormones do then get FFS) but if you have obvious feature you want changed do it. How to tell the Doc? Hi Doc I'm TG MtF and this is my first process I want to look as feminine as possible. He will have one of two reactions. 'Yes I know that' the second is "Thank you for telling me but I guessed that"
Oh BIG revelation being TG and transitioning is not odd people are use to it.
You do need to see a therapist to catch up with letters and stuff so you can get hormones under supervision. Please don't self medicate. You also need the letters to get SRS. If you want that.
Your Mum knows, that is obvious. You are 28 make your own decisions, it is your life and you are obviously a capable and independent person.
Hugs and Keep us informed
Cindy
Thank you for the warm greetings Devlyn and Janet!
Jamie and Cindy, thank you for your thoughts on my introduction....it's a wonderful way to get started.
Hi Mindy, welcome to Susan's!
Just jump into whichever threads you want to, or start new ones if you can't find what you're after. :)
Aethan
Hi Mindy,
Another big Aussie welcome to Susan's family. It's good of you to drop in and say "Hi". Hope you like it here, and you stay for a while.
There is a mountain of information, resources and friendship waiting for you here, you just need to jump in start talking and ask any question you like. You're quite safe here and we are very accepting.
Cindy might be on to something regarding FFS. At your age, HRT can do a lot of things. Maybe wise to shelve FFS until you see the results of HRT. Any how run with it any way you like. This is your life after all.
Looking forward to hearing more of your story in time to come, but in the meantime, be safe, well and happy.
Lotsa huggs
Catherine
Thanks Catherine!
Welcome Mindy,Im Chris and i hope you find all you need.
We all need that special somthing that lets us feel connected to the side we relate to and if this is it for you,then i wish you luck.I do agree,starting hormone treatment would be a good choice,at least in the future.I have started myself not long ago *wont go into that* and i have noticed a huge diffrence-and im 36 lol so i know that,even at my age if it makes a diffrence,it will for you as well and even more so at your age.Good luck to you regardless
Hello Mindy welcome to Susan's.
Welcome Mindy,
As the rest of the welcoming committee stated, your story is not so unlike many of us. When I first came along here in mid 2009 I felt as if I would never be able to pass without extensive surgery and then maybe not even then. But, after losing 95 pounds, growing my hair, living my truth, and hormones - those wonderful wonderful hormones - I am now living every day of my life as a woman and no one blinks an eyelash at me. And I'm 51 years old, so it is entirely possible for you I'm sure.
Before and now.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.emphaticquestions.com%2Fsiteimages%2FD08.jpg&hash=c8a9721d6fde81551b12ec942ba5e29b0e321102)(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.emphaticquestions.com%2Fsiteimages%2FDeanna121812.jpg&hash=097338b63159c0267cf3c2f733989a184139da27)
Wish you well in your journey,
Deanna <3
Thanks Chris for sharing. I was pretty ignorant about what all HRT could do up until now, but at least I caught it before deciding to just go on with my male life and shuffle all of this under the carpet.
Wow Deanna, such a difference, thanks for your testimony of not having problems passing. Is that labradorite or opal around your neck? I'm big into stones :)
Quote from: Mindy More on December 25, 2012, 02:16:46 AM
Thanks Chris for sharing. I was pretty ignorant about what all HRT could do up until now, but at least I caught it before deciding to just go on with my male life and shuffle all of this under the carpet.
Wow Deanna, such a difference, thanks for your testimony of not having problems passing. Is that labradorite or opal around your neck? I'm big into stones :)
Thank you Mindy. It is very nice to be able to just walk through life as the person you were supposed to be. I believe it is about 85% attitude. Once you feel confident and comfortable about yourself and show the world that you are the woman that you are, then people just seem to see you that way. I still see way too much of the old guy in the mirror, but we are all our own worst critics.
Actually the pendant is fused glass with dichroic glass. Very beautiful piece. Hardly natural. I too love stones and would love some labradorite.
Deanna <3
Still a very pretty pendant nonetheless!
Quote from: Mindy More on December 25, 2012, 05:50:36 AM
Still a very pretty pendant nonetheless!
It is gorgeous Mindy. I'll take a picture of it later and post for you. I bought it for my mom a few years ago and she just recently gave it to me, along with a jewelry box full of jewelry. I was quite moved by the gesture. This coming from the woman that a little more than a year ago was not going to accept my "lifestyle". She has come a long way. Life is a wonderful thing.
Deanna <3
Quote from: Deanna_Renee on December 25, 2012, 06:36:44 AM
It is gorgeous Mindy. I'll take a picture of it later and post for you. I bought it for my mom a few years ago and she just recently gave it to me, along with a jewelry box full of jewelry. I was quite moved by the gesture. This coming from the woman that a little more than a year ago was not going to accept my "lifestyle". She has come a long way. Life is a wonderful thing.
Deanna <3
How very sweet of her! Yes, post a pic when you have time :)
Quote from: Mindy More on December 25, 2012, 11:12:55 AM
How very sweet of her! Yes, post a pic when you have time :)
Unfortunately, the beauty of the dichroic glass doesn't translate in a flat photo. The iridescence and colors are breathtaking.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.emphaticquestions.com%2Fsiteimages%2Fpendant.jpg&hash=ca7d07ae5336bd1f919a69b0e58e7b10a7196195)
Deanna <3
Quote from: Deanna_Renee on December 25, 2012, 07:47:52 PM
Unfortunately, the beauty of the dichroic glass doesn't translate in a flat photo. The iridescence and colors are breathtaking.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.emphaticquestions.com%2Fsiteimages%2Fpendant.jpg&hash=ca7d07ae5336bd1f919a69b0e58e7b10a7196195)
Deanna <3
Oh nice! I heart shiny things ;D I don't know much about dichroic glass, but I can point you in the direction of another synthetic material which has caught my eye...
Since I can't post pics yet, I'll just have to tell you to type in "fordite" in Google and see the pictures which come up. It's not a natural material either, but instead is the accumulation of decades of paint buildup at car factories! Have you seen this stuff before?
Oh my! That is pretty! I've never heard of it before, but may need to find myself a cute piece. Thank you Mindy.
Deanna ❤
Mindy, I also wanted to comment on an issue that you mentioned somewhere 'up there' about your concern with your musculature. I wouldn't give that much concern for the future. After you start HRT you will, more than likely, lose a lot of that muscle bulk as the hormones do their work. It may take 6 months or more, depending on how much mass you have, your diet and exercise routines. But, we all lose a lot of that muscle as the body reconfigures the fibers of the tissues to more appropriately align to the
chemistry. Also plan on becoming a weakling girl. Oh, and be prepared to cry at everything. :)
It is a wonderful journey, once you pass the speed bumps.
Deanna <3
Quote from: Mindy More on December 18, 2012, 05:12:02 AM
One question I have, which I can't seem to figure out is this: Is it better to complete the body laser hair removal first? Considering the HRT will affect growth, etc, and make clearance less successful?
I view this as more of a personal choice. Almost everybody you ask will tell you it's a waste of money to do it before HRT because you won't need as much of it after HRT. I'm not on HRT yet and I'm already doing it. I hate having the hair there, so the extra cost of doing it now is less of a concern for me than it actually being there is. To each their own.
Quote from: Deanna_Renee on December 26, 2012, 05:39:47 AM
Oh my! That is pretty! I've never heard of it before, but may need to find myself a cute piece. Thank you Mindy.
Deanna ❤
My pleasure Deanna.
Quote from: Emily52736 on December 26, 2012, 12:17:02 PM
I view this as more of a personal choice. Almost everybody you ask will tell you it's a waste of money to do it before HRT because you won't need as much of it after HRT. I'm not on HRT yet and I'm already doing it. I hate having the hair there, so the extra cost of doing it now is less of a concern for me than it actually being there is. To each their own.
I've always hated the hair as well but I'm very much a perfectionist with a touch of OCD, so you can see the way my mind works. When I first skimmed what you said Emily, I thought you were addressing facial feminization so I started to backpedal a bit. Yesterday, I came across one website discussing the steps of transitioning, and the author of these steps very clearly says that surgery should ALWAYS come after HRT, so I started to think if I was making a mistake by going forward with the procedures in Feb. They also said that transitioning is the last act of a desperate person (all seemingly spoken from experience). I guess it was meant to be taken frankly and make people think twice by painting this negative picture. I started to think about things negatively, but then I thought about how I'm taking things one step at a time and how much of a dream come true this would actually be. The one thing that did overwhelm me though when I woke up in the morning is the nature of how much work I have cut out for me. I suppose that is what this website is for though!
Quote from: Deanna_Renee on December 26, 2012, 10:47:13 AM
Mindy, I also wanted to comment on an issue that you mentioned somewhere 'up there' about your concern with your musculature. I wouldn't give that much concern for the future. After you start HRT you will, more than likely, lose a lot of that muscle bulk as the hormones do their work. It may take 6 months or more, depending on how much mass you have, your diet and exercise routines. But, we all lose a lot of that muscle as the body reconfigures the fibers of the tissues to more appropriately align to the chemistry. Also plan on becoming a weakling girl. Oh, and be prepared to cry at everything. :)
It is a wonderful journey, once you pass the speed bumps.
Deanna <3
I'll probably never tire of hearing about how the hormones contribute to muscle loss...it's probably the one thing I look forward to the most with the HRT. I have no problem becoming a weakling, but I better not find myself trading my passion for sci-fi films for tear jerkers! I have no problem crying through Aliens 1-4.
Quote from: Mindy More on December 27, 2012, 10:06:11 AM
I'll probably never tire of hearing about how the hormones contribute to muscle loss...it's probably the one thing I look forward to the most with the HRT. I have no problem becoming a weakling, but I better not find myself trading my passion for sci-fi films for tear jerkers! I have no problem crying through Aliens 1-4.
Mindy, your sci-fi affections are safe. I can assure you of that. Myself and many of my friends (more so them) are avid fans. That's not to say your tastes won't change in what you like/dislike in the genre. Speaking of taste, that tends to change a good bit as well. I may be more acutely aware of it, because I'm something of a gourmet. I have found myself like many things I used hate and disliking other things I used to devour. Overall my palate has become more developed in the past two years and that has resulted in my becoming far more creative in the kitchen. I know many artists and musicians whose interests have shifted and more refined one/or diverse.
You have so much to look forward to. It is truly a wonderful experience, in my opinion. As always YMMV
Oh, also expect your skin to become much softer and thinner. You will become more sensitive to temperature (especially if you continue to lose weight - I've lost 95 pounds) and also a lot more susceptible to pain and cuts/injury. I used to have an enormously high pain threshhold - I've been beaten up, kicked in face by black belts, had concussions, burns and all and barely felt any pain. Now, I bump into something with not too much force and I'm writhing in pain and most likely bleeding. Still trying to get used to that.
Deanna <3
Hi Mindy and welcome to Susan's.
:)
Quote from: Deanna_Renee on December 27, 2012, 10:23:15 AM
Mindy, your sci-fi affections are safe. I can assure you of that. Myself and many of my friends (more so them) are avid fans. That's not to say your tastes won't change in what you like/dislike in the genre. Speaking of taste, that tends to change a good bit as well. I may be more acutely aware of it, because I'm something of a gourmet. I have found myself like many things I used hate and disliking other things I used to devour. Overall my palate has become more developed in the past two years and that has resulted in my becoming far more creative in the kitchen. I know many artists and musicians whose interests have shifted and more refined one/or diverse.
You have so much to look forward to. It is truly a wonderful experience, in my opinion. As always YMMV
That is good to hear Deanna. I'm a passionate person, but I'm always receptive to changes and refinements which come along the way. Nice to hear how you have awakened your culinary flair!:) It will be a cold day in you know where before I can patiently stand in the kitchen and prepare something worth writing home about...but then again you never know. I just loveee applying myself. I've come to accept. So hopefully I'll see a meaningful Renaissance in my own life, in whichever facet happens to be the one.
Quote from: Deanna_Renee on December 27, 2012, 10:33:35 AM
Oh, also expect your skin to become much softer and thinner. You will become more sensitive to temperature (especially if you continue to lose weight - I've lost 95 pounds) and also a lot more susceptible to pain and cuts/injury. I used to have an enormously high pain threshhold - I've been beaten up, kicked in face by black belts, had concussions, burns and all and barely felt any pain. Now, I bump into something with not too much force and I'm writhing in pain and most likely bleeding. Still trying to get used to that.
Deanna <3
and they say women have the higher pain threshold! well leave it to a transgendered woman to set the record straight. Of course childbirth is an arena you nor I could ever experience so they've got that on us. I actually think I have a pretty high pain threshold myself too, or at least my reaction to pain has become more tempered over the years..as in, I will process the situation as follows: "OUCH, my arm has just been lacerated by a sharp door handle, I am in pain, but I'll smile, because people are watching me, even though that really hurt and I should be belting out at least one good profanity"- So I guess now, going by your experience, I am going to be on the floor with a throbbing arm.
Well maybe the upshot will have to be that with the added weight loss and restructuring, I could eventually gain a better sense of balance and hopefully develop a quasi-graceful manner of moving around obstructions......Maybe? I won't hold my breath, but I do have to recondition all aspects of how I move and use gestures.
Oh and congrats on your weight loss!!
Quote from: gennee on December 27, 2012, 03:46:08 PM
Hi Mindy and welcome to Susan's.
:)
Thank you Gennee!
I don't know if I've become more clumsy/awkward/accident prone or if it is that I am now feeling every time I walk into something, bump something, or get within range of things.
Quote from: Deanna_Renee on December 27, 2012, 06:48:43 PM
I don't know if I've become more clumsy/awkward/accident prone or if it is that I am now feeling every time I walk into something, bump something, or get within range of things.
I'm pretty accident prone myself and I'll probably realize it more so going forward with the HRT as well. A few months ago, I tore my meniscus literally by standing up wrong after repacking my bags at the airport security check if you can believe that.
On a side note, how do you insert and/or attach images if you don't mind me asking? I might not have the right to do so yet and I couldn't find information on that in the rules section.
When you're writing a post, there is a button in the toolbar (should be underneath the B - bold - button to insert image. You will need to have the image somewhere online, like Photobucket, I use one of my own websites, and you add the URL for the image "[ img ]" IN BETWEEN HERE "[ / img ]" no quotes or spaces. Now that you have 16 posts you should be able to post inages.
Deanna <3
Quote from: Deanna_Renee on December 28, 2012, 07:27:18 AM
When you're writing a post, there is a button in the toolbar (should be underneath the B - bold - button to insert image. You will need to have the image somewhere online, like Photobucket, I use one of my own websites, and you add the URL for the image "[ img ]" IN BETWEEN HERE "[ / img ]" no quotes or spaces. Now that you have 16 posts you should be able to post inages.
Deanna <3
That makes sense, thanks Deanna.
Quote from: Mindy More on December 27, 2012, 10:06:11 AM
I'll probably never tire of hearing about how the hormones contribute to muscle loss...it's probably the one thing I look forward to the most with the HRT. I have no problem becoming a weakling, but I better not find myself trading my passion for sci-fi films for tear jerkers! I have no problem crying through Aliens 1-4.
Hi, Mindy, welcome to the great family :)
I'm also something like you. I am a computer programmer and nerd and nothing has changed in that aspect, but I am much more willing to work a lot because I found sense in life.
Physically, I'm a 'secure' person, so I don't mind being much, much more fragile than before (5'8" & 140lbs as a parameter) and my arms are much thinner, my upper body has lost a lot of muscles and so on. But I like it, it's just different.
And I'm also into women (androgyne ones or even FtM if it's close to A, as I am the opposite). That's also not going to change a lot, generally, because gender identity is completely separated from the sexuality.
Hope you have a great time :)
The fifteen post restriction applies to avatar pictures, pictures in threads are allowed from the first post. Hugs, Devlyn
Quote from: soulfairer on December 28, 2012, 09:29:56 AM
Hi, Mindy, welcome to the great family :)
I'm also something like you. I am a computer programmer and nerd and nothing has changed in that aspect, but I am much more willing to work a lot because I found sense in life.
Physically, I'm a 'secure' person, so I don't mind being much, much more fragile than before (5'8" & 140lbs as a parameter) and my arms are much thinner, my upper body has lost a lot of muscles and so on. But I like it, it's just different.
And I'm also into women (androgyne ones or even FtM if it's close to A, as I am the opposite). That's also not going to change a lot, generally, because gender identity is completely separated from the sexuality.
Hope you have a great time :)
Hi Carolina,
Thanks for the welcome!
Interesting to hear you address gender identity and its relationship to sexuality. This was something my therapist asked me to reconsider in my last session. That is, if your body will finally match the way you see yourself mentally, will that if at all, lift any road blocks for your sexuality. To me, the answer to this question is really not going to be fully understood until some point during my transition but it never hurts to ponder a little.
Call me a noob, but I actually had to look up "androgyne" and double check that it related to androgyny the way I thought it did. If I am getting it right, do yo mean that you are more feminine and prefer women with more androgynous features?
Have a great weekend,
Mindy
Quote from: Mindy More on December 29, 2012, 01:31:38 PM
Hi Carolina,
Thanks for the welcome!
Interesting to hear you address gender identity and its relationship to sexuality. This was something my therapist asked me to reconsider in my last session. That is, if your body will finally match the way you see yourself mentally, will that if at all, lift any road blocks for your sexuality. To me, the answer to this question is really not going to be fully understood until some point during my transition but it never hurts to ponder a little.
Call me a noob, but I actually had to look up "androgyne" and double check that it related to androgyny the way I thought it did. If I am getting it right, do yo mean that you are more feminine and prefer women with more androgynous features?
Have a great weekend,
Mindy
I had reconsidered some part of the sexuality thing. I like women with androgynous features. But if a woman changes her identity to a male one, but not too male-ish, why shouldn't I consider having a relationship with her/him? I am all into androgyny itself, which can be shown in a number of aspects. Regarding the "equipment", then I really prefer a female one.
You should, after changing a bit, reconsider all things again, because you yourself are changing. Then you may become more (or less) flexible about some things. Recently I was with a man, bearded one, but I just felt uncomfortable – and that discomfort hasn't happened before. So you may expect, oh yeah, some changes.
Love,
Carolina
Changes in sexuality (orientation) do happen for many during transition, but certainly not all. For me my orientation only changed labels. I have always, and continue to be, attracted to women. Before, when I was labeled a man, I was considered heterosexual. Now that I'm a woman, I'm labeled a lesbian. I'm perfectly happy and proud to take that title, along with transsexual.
It seems to me that more often younger transitioners tend towards being heterosexual, while us older folks tend to be lesbian/gay. Of course I know many who defy the rules. Fortunately each and every one of us is a unique and complex individual.
There are so many things to look forward to in the years ahead. Sit back and enjoy the ride!
Quote from: Deanna_Renee on December 29, 2012, 08:25:11 PM
Changes in sexuality (orientation) do happen for many during transition, but certainly not all. For me my orientation only changed labels. I have always, and continue to be, attracted to women. Before, when I was labeled a man, I was considered heterosexual. Now that I'm a woman, I'm labeled a lesbian. I'm perfectly happy and proud to take that title, along with transsexual.
It seems to me that more often younger transitioners tend towards being heterosexual, while us older folks tend to be lesbian/gay. Of course I know many who defy the rules. Fortunately each and every one of us is a unique and complex individual.
There are so many things to look forward to in the years ahead. Sit back and enjoy the ride!
Well here's to enjoying the ride in 2013, Happy New Years Deanna!
Quote from: soulfairer on December 29, 2012, 03:11:23 PM
I had reconsidered some part of the sexuality thing. I like women with androgynous features. But if a woman changes her identity to a male one, but not too male-ish, why shouldn't I consider having a relationship with her/him? I am all into androgyny itself, which can be shown in a number of aspects. Regarding the "equipment", then I really prefer a female one.
You should, after changing a bit, reconsider all things again, because you yourself are changing. Then you may become more (or less) flexible about some things. Recently I was with a man, bearded one, but I just felt uncomfortable – and that discomfort hasn't happened before. So you may expect, oh yeah, some changes.
Love,
Carolina
I'll look forward to that day when I've changed enough to confidently reconsider things! Thanks for sharing your insight Carolina and Happy New Years!
Hi Mindy!
Im new too, and loved your intro. You seem to have a good plan in mind! Thats helping me a ton to think about things. All the repression I have done over the years just caught up to me big time, and floored me. So I picked myself up of the floor I just now found Susans, so reading about what you said has already totally helped some of us.
I think all the uncertainties we share will turn to strengths as we explore and uncover who we know now is our real selves!
Here is to all a wonderful New Year and 2013, our brightest voyages yet :-)
Thanks Mindy!!
with care,
-Kii (Kee)
Quote from: Kii on December 31, 2012, 06:07:44 PM
I think all the uncertainties we share will turn to strengths as we explore and uncover who we know now is our real selves!
Kii, as one who was overwhelmed with uncertainties in June 2009 when I first stumbled across Susan's I can certainly say that I have gained tremendous strength (lost lots of the physical kind) and confidence through this journey. Even as recently as a year and a half ago I would have balked at the idea of my being outgoing, [semi] popular, happy beyond measure and living full time as a woman with no problems at all being seen and treated as a woman.
Welcome to the family and enjoy your life.
Deanna <3
Quote from: Kii on December 31, 2012, 06:07:44 PM
Hi Mindy!
Im new too, and loved your intro. You seem to have a good plan in mind! Thats helping me a ton to think about things. All the repression I have done over the years just caught up to me big time, and floored me. So I picked myself up of the floor I just now found Susans, so reading about what you said has already totally helped some of us.
I think all the uncertainties we share will turn to strengths as we explore and uncover who we know now is our real selves!
Here is to all a wonderful New Year and 2013, our brightest voyages yet :-)
Thanks Mindy!!
with care,
-Kii (Kee)
Hi Kii,
Thanks for saying thanks! I actually never thought about how posting my story would do a service to anyone else...but I'm happy to be of service. I certainly did spew out a lot at once. I still feel the same way as I did, if not more galvanized, but I have been giving more thought to timing and my career itself.
UPDATE:
Hello again!
It's been about 2 months since I introduced myself and laid out my "aggressive plan" for 2013.
Well, guess what...I've made it all the way through everything I set out to accomplish and I am better for it! Thanks everyone for your words of encouragement!
Yours truly,
Mindy
Hi Mindy,
Congrats on quiting the cancer stick addiction!
And looseing the 60 pounds.
:-*
Quote from: Channel on February 21, 2013, 03:26:25 AM
Hi Mindy,
Congrats on quiting the cancer stick addiction!
And looseing the 60 pounds.
:-*
Thanks! :)