Hello Susan's Place,
I am very excited to be joining this forum today! I am in need of some kind of a community that can help support me as I begin this new journey with my wife as she transitions.
I can give you a little bit of back story. I married my partner 6 years ago. We were high school sweethearts and when we got married the world saw my wife as a man (and I did too). In our first four years of marriage we lived in Japan for a year, moved to Oklahoma and converted to Judaism. About a year and a half ago my partner decided that she (then "he") wanted to become a Rabbi, so we moved to Philadelphia so she could study at the RRC. I went back to school to get my Masters in Early Childhood Education. When we celebrated our 5 year wedding anniversary, I thought things were going well and was blind sided when my partner came out to me as being transgendered. She came out to me a few days before my 29th birthday and shaved off her beard on my birthday. (This year I told her I just wanted to go out to eat... with no surprises). :)
To make a long story short, this past year has been difficult for me. I struggled with my partner's transition at first and was really angry/hurt/depressed for a long time. But I found that once I started listening to what my wife had to say about her struggles and once I saw how much happier she was becoming the more she transitioned, the more I was able to accept this change.
What has surprised me most about this transition is that in many ways our partnership has been better. We laugh more, my partner is more open with me and she holds my hand in public!!! (I remember how before she transitioned my partner would pull her hand away when I tried to hold it in public. That would always make me feel so terrible).
So I have decided that I still really love this person and that I want to stay with her as she transitions. This person in my soul mate and that has not changed.
That being said, I still need support during all of this and there are days that are hard. Dealing with people's mean comments, stupid questions and dealing with transphobia has been hard!!!! So I thought joining this forum would help me and give me a place to vent to others who are dealing with similar issues. Also, it would help to find others who I could learn from during this exciting/crazy/scary/joyful time. Also, if I can help anyone in some way with my experience that would be cool too!
Take care and I will keep posting!
Welcome, Emi :). That's quite a journey you're going through together, and I think you're wise to be open to your feelings changing - and maybe for the better. I hope you find plenty of support here. Will your wife be joining us too?
Hi EmiB,
A big Aussie welcome to Susan's family. It's good of you to drop in and say "Hi". Hope you like it here, and you stay for a while.
There is a mountain of information, resources and friendship waiting for you here, you just need to jump in start talking and ask any question you like. You're quite safe here and we are very accepting.
Hopefully by now you have found the SO support section of Susan's. I truly hope you are able to find the answers to the plethora of questions you have. Indeed I compliment and congratulate you n your courage and determination in persevering with your relationship. You have insights many of us have not.
Looking forward to hearing more of your story in time to come, but in the meantime, be safe, well and happy.
Lotsa huggs
Catherine
Hi EmiB, :icon_wave:
Welcome to our little family. Over 9416 strong. That would be one heck of a family reunion.
Feel free to post your successes/failures, Hopes/dreams. Ask questions and seek answers. Give and receive advice.
But remember we are family here, your family now. And it is always nice to have another SO. (https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fsmileys.on-my-web.com%2Frepository%2FAnimals%2Fferret-3.gif&hash=f49e2f86761323f2abd9c33941920389dbb3b10f)
And be sure to check out these links ( MUST READS ) (https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fsmileys.on-my-web.com%2Frepository%2FAnimals%2Fferret-8.gif&hash=d9498942f8bbb4bf3ad29af75944ea5e1135c6fa)
- Site Terms of Service and rules to live by (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,2.0.html)
- Standard Terms and Definitions (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,54369.0.html)
- Post Ranks ( including when you can upload an avatar) (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,114.0.html.) (https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fanimations.fg-a.com%2FBack412a.gif&hash=a9ae4e4ae245e02788d56f99a8c4cedb2f27f18c)
- Reputation Rules (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,18960.msg146855.html#msg146855)
- Age and the Forum (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,62197.msg405545.html#msg405545)
- Photo, avatars, and signature images policy (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,59974.msg383866.html#msg383866)
May the Goddess bless you home.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fsmileys.on-my-web.com%2Frepository%2FAnimals%2Fferret-5.gif&hash=cfc7a68438be4575d8493dfbe65d1b3586f10b81)
Janet (https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fupload.wikimedia.org%2Fwikipedia%2Fcommons%2F3%2F32%2FPentacle_1.svg&hash=99e763d33bc5c4d79014cb34bf6acb3dfec8befb)
Hi Emi, it's nice to meet you! I live near Boston. We love couples here at Susan's, glad you found the site. Hugs, Devlyn
Welcome Emi! I'm so glad you're here :) what an amazing support system your partner has! I'm sure it's not been easy, but good for you for standing by her. I'm glad this transition has semmed to strengthen your relationship. This forum will be incredibly supportive & loving to both you and your partner....there's also a lot of help & support to be found in the 'significant others' section of the forum. Hope to see you around!
Welcome, Emi. We have a special "Significant Others" forum, designed for people in your same situation.
I would like to invite your partner and soulmate to join us as well.
Hi Emi,
Welcome and much love from another Aussie. The journey will be difficult but it is one that can be made and one that can help and build a joyful life. Yes there will be down times and yes your wife will make you want to tear your hair out and probably hers as well. But love is a mighty glue.
I have been married for over 30 years. I told my wife I was TG when we were dating.
We love each other completely.
Hugs and welcome.
Cindy
Welcome to Susan's, Emi. It's taken my wife to accept me as trans.
It's taken patience, encouraging, and some guidance. Today,
we are a happy couple.
:)