Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Transgender talk => Topic started by: lejanie on January 27, 2013, 02:03:30 PM

Title: CIS female dating 13 mo MTF
Post by: lejanie on January 27, 2013, 02:03:30 PM
Hi, I'm a straight (ish?) female who has been dating a 13 mo MTF for almost a month now. I met him (yes, we still use that pronoun) from an internet dating website and we get along great!

However, we have had some sexual problems... he has a hard time maintaining an erection and he seems pretty bummed by it most of the time. I think if we do anything that's just penis related, it tends to not work out so well.

We were thinking about experimenting with viagra to see if that would help. He's not like, disgusted by his penis or erections or anything so we think it'd be okay. We might try the strap on route for both of us if that doesn't work very well.

We haven't given up on heterosexual sex altogether, but I'm open minded to changing stuff up if we need to or if he does SRS sometime figuring out that too.

Any pointers? I have only been with men before so sometimes I wonder if I'm just not romancing my lady right.
Title: Re: CIS female dating 13 mo MTF
Post by: JLT1 on January 27, 2013, 02:45:16 PM
If he's on hormones, talk with the Endo or the GP.  If he's not, still talk to the GP.  I have heard that Viagra might be a possibility.  I can think of two, possibly three other possible options as well.  However, all the pharma stuff needs to go through a doctor. 

I'll leave the technique discussion up to others.  Have FUN!!!!
Title: Re: CIS female dating 13 mo MTF
Post by: Shawn Sunshine on January 27, 2013, 02:50:41 PM
Not to pry or anything, but do your parents know you are dating and having sex? Are you using protection?
Title: Re: CIS female dating 13 mo MTF
Post by: Emily Aster on January 27, 2013, 02:52:54 PM
I'm not sure if viagra would be a good idea while on hormones. That's more of a doctor question. If he's okay with still using his penis, there are strap-ons that are hollow that you might want to consider.
Title: Re: CIS female dating 13 mo MTF
Post by: Emily Aster on January 27, 2013, 02:54:23 PM
Quote from: Shawn Sunshine on January 27, 2013, 02:50:41 PM
Not to pry or anything, but do your parents know you are dating and having sex? Are you using protection?

I think you misread the title, like I did. It's not a 13 yo having a sex.
Title: Re: CIS female dating 13 mo MTF
Post by: VannaSiamese on January 27, 2013, 03:00:22 PM
Maybe he should try reducing the dose of testosterone blocker a bit, it should help.
If that doesn't work, change the sex up a bit. I do suggest trying the strap on route, but try it on him first. It's kinda hard to not get an erection when stimulating the prostate.
Title: Re: CIS female dating 13 mo MTF
Post by: Shawn Sunshine on January 27, 2013, 03:58:10 PM
Quote from: Emily52736 on January 27, 2013, 02:54:23 PM
I think you misread the title, like I did. It's not a 13 yo having a sex.

Ahh yes LOL  >:-)
Title: Re: CIS female dating 13 mo MTF
Post by: spacial on January 27, 2013, 06:50:06 PM
I don't really get errections. It's just a fact of my biology and what I am.

But Viagra carries incredable risks for many people.

Can I suggest you try to live the the realities and experiement with other things?
Title: Re: CIS female dating 13 mo MTF
Post by: JoanneB on January 27, 2013, 07:27:50 PM
Depending on if/how long on HRT you may be fighting a loosing battle. Even  with low dose estrogen in my 20's after about 3-4 months I started loosing my ability to perform over any sustained period.

How it hits you is a case of YMMV. I've heard of other girls saying how things actually worked better or no issues at all.

Your best bet, as others suggested, is to talk to the endocrynolygist about options. There are several. Some you must be V-E-R-Y dedicated to resorting to  :o
Title: Re: CIS female dating 13 mo MTF
Post by: Lesley_Roberta on January 28, 2013, 02:58:36 PM
Great sex is between the ears, but, if a male bodied person is undergoing the process of becoming female, hmmm logic would seem to suggest the process is responsible. In due time, transitioning means replacing the part. Eventually there simply won't be a penis present.

But from what little I know (which is very little) they don't remove the on button, they just wire it up to a input device (I hope that analogy makes some sense).

Eventually, it all becomes 'what exactly is it that makes the person reach the point where they groan out their OMG moment?'. Because given enough time, won't it be two girls having sex? If you are female and 'he' is becoming female, then you will both be needing the strap on.