Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Transgender talk => Topic started by: Kevin Peña on January 27, 2013, 06:02:01 PM

Title: Nervous.
Post by: Kevin Peña on January 27, 2013, 06:02:01 PM
Alright, I am going to a consultation to get "primary transgender health care" with a no-insurance plan at a clinic tomorrow. However, I am very nervous. I keep thinking that upon being evaluated or interviewed or whatever it is they do, they might think that I'm not really transgender for some strange reason. I've got a bad case of the jitters. Can people give me insight into their first days to ease my nerves a bit?

Also, note that I don't have insurance. How much did your lab stuff and hormones cost?  ???
Title: Re: Nervous.
Post by: Kevin Peña on January 28, 2013, 09:06:20 AM
Leaving in a couple of hours.  :(

Hello?
Title: Re: Nervous.
Post by: Sarah Blomsterhatt on January 28, 2013, 09:15:48 AM
I don't think you got much to worry about. I don't think anyone will say you're transgender, or that you're not transgender after a first visit. As long as you're being honest with both yourself and them you will be fine. Also depending on the experience of whoever you're seeing, be ready to stupid questions, the person I've been seeing is one of the most experienced persons in Sweden, and I still got stupid questions like; "Are you sure you want to be a girl, maybe you just want to be with a girl?". But stay vigiliant and be honest and things will work out fine.

As for insurance I really don't have much to say, I live in Sweden so I never had to worry about it. Sorry I couldn't be more insightful on that point.

Brake a leg. :)

/S
Title: Re: Nervous.
Post by: Kevin Peña on January 28, 2013, 09:19:52 AM
Oh, if they ask questions like that, I might actually laugh at the silliness of it all.  ???

Geez, I just want this to go by faster and get started with my transition.  :(

:icon_help:
Title: Re: Nervous.
Post by: Emily Aster on January 28, 2013, 09:29:30 AM
I don't think they're really stupid questions. There's a lot that can be deduced from your answers to those questions and your body language when you answer them. I think a question like are you sure really is just meant to figure out exactly what was asked. Are you really sure? Have you thought this through? Are there other possibilities that you haven't thought of? This is a life-changing event and we tend to get a bit of tunnel vision when we are ready to go, blocking out potential pitfalls as being insignificant. They just want to know that you're really ready for this before giving the go-ahead. There have been a lot of people in the past that sued these people for not stopping someone that shouldn't have transitioned. So they're just covering their own butts by making sure that you're covering yours.
Title: Re: Nervous.
Post by: Kevin Peña on January 28, 2013, 09:36:54 AM
Oh, "Are you sure?" is a good question. However, I was referring to the one right after it.

Quote from: Sarah Blomsterhatt on January 28, 2013, 09:15:48 AM
"Are you sure you want to be a girl, maybe you just want to be with a girl?"

That one.
Title: Re: Nervous.
Post by: Emily Aster on January 28, 2013, 09:39:28 AM
That's just another possibility. Maybe some people don't analyze enough to consider it. It sounds rather trivial to you, but maybe someone actually changed their mind when presented with a question like that in the past, so they continue to use it.
Title: Re: Nervous.
Post by: Kevin Peña on January 28, 2013, 09:44:06 AM
Good point.
Title: Re: Nervous.
Post by: Lesley_Roberta on January 28, 2013, 02:37:52 PM
Remember, just because they get paid, doesn't mean they are any good.

My first encounter with a shrink in my teens was kinda 'this is a waste of time, but better than school'.

In my 30s I encountered someone thanks to my depression thanks to my fybromyalgia, that well I have nothing but thoughts I can't print and stay inside of forum rules. The woman is useless. She had a counselor I also was seeing, nothing but an aid to a useless shrink.

I saw another person, a man later on, and he was a great waste of time. Didn't hate him, but I am glad my pension was paying for it.

I saw a counselor thanks to marriage troubles connected to my life being one series of bad situations after another, but it was originally for my wife and I got to attend. THIS woman though, she actually possessed the needed skill to actually matter. I think she saved my marriage. She is also responsible for me being here (alive) as well as connecting me with the right people on several occasions.

Are you sure you want to be a woman? Is a logical question.

Because it means breasts or needing to look like you have them, and that means a bra, and no you can't go without one now. And stop crying if it's hot out, suffer like all the other women do. And no, you can't go topless even if legal, unless you actually DO develop at least something in the way of breasts or it just makes you look awkward.

You reeeeeeeeally want to need to really be a woman. So it is logical they will ask you, are you sure you want to do this?

Because there is more to being a woman than a hair do and some lipstick. It's not just wearing a skirt. You can't get out of your woman at the end of the day, you will be a woman all day long and all night long. It's cross dressers that are just dressing up (nothing wrong with that, just pointing out that they CAN turn off the woman later in the day.

I would love to be able to be 100% female, to actually need to worry if someone walked into the room while I was changing and it was not another girl.

I would not mind losing the option to unzip and pee standing against a tree in the woods.

I would not mind needing to re think walking alone at night.
Title: Re: Nervous.
Post by: Kevin Peña on January 28, 2013, 02:57:20 PM
Quote from: Lesley_Roberta on January 28, 2013, 02:37:52 PM
Because there is more to being a woman than a hair do and some lipstick. It's not just wearing a skirt. You can't get out of your woman at the end of the day, you will be a woman all day long and all night long.

Well, that's obvious.  :P

I didn't know that going bra-less was illegal.  My aunt never wears one, and she's a C cup.


Anywho, I went there, and since I don't have insurance, I have to wait until April 17th to be able to start anything. Oh well, at least I won't have to pay that much ($5 copay).
Title: Re: Nervous.
Post by: Sarah Blomsterhatt on January 28, 2013, 03:03:43 PM
80% of the time I don't use a bra, and when I do it's because I know that what I'm wearing will show off my nipples and I don't feel comfortable with that (well, depends on the company.), my breasts are big enough that you can't miss them unless I wear a really baggy hoddie that is three sizes too big or some of my jackets. I'm just more comfortable without a bra.

I used to always wear one alot before my breasts developed though, just put two socks in there and it worked for me. Cheap student solutions!

Also congratulations on the progress, you're on your way.  ;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: Nervous.
Post by: Emily Aster on January 28, 2013, 03:03:55 PM
Quote from: DianaP on January 28, 2013, 02:57:20 PM
I didn't know that going bra-less was illegal.  My aunt never wears one, and she's a C cup.


Anywho, I went there, and since I don't have insurance, I have to wait until April 17th to be able to start anything. Oh well, at least I won't have to pay that much ($5 copay).

I think it's more of a style thing. I remember women going bra-less in the 70s to be the in thing to do, but now people seem to feel the opposite way. It kind of stinks when you really think about it. You break out of one gender prison and land in another one where you're still expected to conform.

Seeing the good in every situation. I like it.