Do you think transexualism has something to do with "sensitivity level" ie are transwomen actually more sensitive than the biological men we were supposed to be, or most women even for that matter? I have been having a lot of issues with my gender recently and I always try to push these feelings aside and they always come back to haunt me. From my first awakening moments as a child was an understanding that "these boys are so insensitive, I want to feel" I do not want to compete for dominance etc. I was always called "sissy" "wuss" etc. I never even tried to develop a male shell however, instead I isolated. But to me feeling feminine has something to do with the way how I interpret my surroundings, how I absorb the world, and relate to it. There are also sexual feelings. I was an only child growing up, so never had a sister, and to be honest was never really into clothes, or dolls, but I felt a certain type of connectedness in my body, to the world, almost like a maternal instinct a need to "feel" and be connected and at one with my surroundings and not dominating it, or fighting for dominance. But it is like my body is trying to make me into a strapping man and to make me aggressive and like my mind is fighting this. I am not yet ready to transition and have a lot of issues to work out but, perhaps with hrt that feeling would diminish but I am just curious what really made you start to realize that you were transgendered. There have been studies of cisgendered children that conclude that girls are in fact more sensitive to boys, and for me my transsexual feelings have to do with wanting to show/ express that sensitivity, but be strong at the same time. I mean being a child who was emotionally expressive, had a deep interest in nature, wild flowers, and living things in general and who felt a certain sense of "connectedness to my environment" but cried a lot and hid away to become invisible. I can say with really high certainty that yes, I am very sensitive, and because of that I was bullied, but by also being logical, and using my sensitivity to see how others treated each other, I feared coming out so much that I kept my mouth shut and developed inward. Today I am socially isolated, and have little connection with people yet feel this strong emotional drive and need to connect it with something more than simply "observing" the world like a ghost.
Perhaps this is a stupid question. It seems right now I am looking for closure, to accept the fact that I am transgendered. I am 24 years old, and have literally been trying to put this stuff under the rug, and burry it away for so long and it is destroying me like an incredibly heavy burden.
Hi,
I'm a lot older than 24, sadly, but when I realised I was a girl I was around 5 yrs old, transgender etc didn't exist. At least not in any accessible means. I was a girl and I had no idea why I had this body that boys had. I don'y know if I was more or less sensitive, I was a girl and I seemed to fit in with othere girls. I did try to fit in as a boy but that didn't work out. Boys didn't seem to get on with me, and I didn't with them. I was just different.
Nowadays with the internet and communication as it is we have ready answers or at least information about different sexual or gender orientations. I never knew that boys were less sensitive than girls. I only knew what I was.
I reflect on the 60's and 70's with the women's lib movement and thought put forward that if we brought male and female children up the same way they could decide their orientation and interests later. Boys should be allowed to play with girl toys and girls play with boy toys. And of course that is now totally normal and acceptable, but it became and is very apparent at a very early age that boys and girls are totally different in their early childhood development. Boys are generally far more boisterous and out going and girls are generally more introspective and questioning.
I certainly fitted the traditional girl mould. But I'm not sure that anything like that can be generalised to suggest that early behaviour patterns are indicative of sexual nature or gender variance.
IDK... I've never been alpha in any kind of way, but I've been pretty controlling about how I want the household to work with my roommates. At least that's what one of my roommates say. As far as wanting to sympathize, I faked sympathy in comparison to the sympathy I have now that I've been on HRT for a while. The feeling deep down in my gut to feel sorry or happy or whatever for somebody was never there pre HRT... I just knew that I *should* sympathize because that's what caring people do (and I did care). It's kinda like, now I can actually feel peoples emotions when something they say makes me feel good or bad for them.
That's not to say I was just as insensitive as a guy when I was pre-hrt. I still cried during sad movies, smiled when I was happy for somebody etc. People knew me as a pretty excitable, colorful guy. But the uncontrollable "awww" only happened after HRT.
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I don't know about "sensitive" per say but from my traveling Hobbit experiences, the MTF crowd are def the most "argumentative" than any other group of people I have ever met lol.
Put 10 MTF in a room, close the door, and wait 2 hours. It's like a reenactment of a battle scene from "BraveHeart."
Unfortunately, I'd fully internalised the 'gender=genitalia' misconception at a very early age. Consequently, I never even considered that being female was an option. I could do 'girly things', and empathise more with women than men, but actually being female barely even crossed my mind.
From age 11 onwards I went to an all boys' school, and they definitely picked up on me being slightly 'different', though it was for being 'queer' and not trans (though really, they probably thought of them as one and the same). In particular, crying (which I'd done before) was never an option, or you'd pay for it immensely. I'd manage to tune myself out of it by age 14 or so, and in fact to this day I still almost never cry (well, except when my eye gets irritated by dust or something, but that doesn't really count).
It's quite ironic, really. Back then I hated my voice because it was stupidly high-pitched compared to everyone else, and was the primary reason behind the bullying. Nowadays, I really wish I had it back...
But yeah, I can definitely understand a lot of what you're saying here. Not being able to take your gender for granted makes you view the world very differently indeed...
I'm much more sensitive than the average male-bodied person. But I think that's a result of spending my life wanting to be more female and working on it. I didn't start out that way, for sure.
I know a lot of MtFs in real life. In terms of sensitivity they strike me (in general) to tend toward the masculine side of the spectrum.
Generally speaking it wouldn't surprise me if this was the case.
Speaking just for myself, I was definitely a more sensitive child than the other boys in school and generally found them loud and obnoxious to be around, as a result I did isolate myself for a spell but ultimately gave in and developed (as you say) a male shell. This I think had the affect that I would often appear a bit cold and distant to people, went to far in the other direction to compensate kind of thing. It wasn't really until I moved to a new place, and met new people that I started to let that side of myself out again. But I think I'm still suppressing myself quite a lot in day to day life right now, as is probably evidenced by how much more girly I am when drunk.
The female spectrum of sensitivity is huge, our minds are female so we are all under that spectrum. Perhaps as a "dude" some of us may of been considered highly sensitive but thats because people analyze you by what they see and not who you are.
Quote from: Rita on February 02, 2013, 07:58:29 AM
The female spectrum of sensitivity is huge, our minds are female so we are all under that spectrum.
I've always thought the "our minds are female" assertion is a simplification.
The parts of our mind that informs us of our gender, definitely female.
But for me, I think the rest of my mind is decidedly male. The way I solve problems, my social impulses, very male. I can compartmentalize my feelings easily in a way that a lot of females find difficult. My first impulse is to solve the problem not to be concerned about the feelings of those involved.
I've had to learn the the female "way" of doing things. Oddly through most of that time, I didn't even know I was trans, just knew that I wanted to make myself as female as I could. But it's been hard. I still find myself falling back sometimes into behaviors that are stereotypically male despite my best efforts.
I've always been extremely compelled to help others and offer support in a sympathetic manner, though I can't claim to have experienced intense *emotional* sympathy while doing so in the past. This emotional constriction has been lifted since beginning HRT.
All of my cis-male friends, however, are also very empathetic; I think much of men's perceived lack of sensitivity is cultural rather than biological.
Quote from: hazel on February 02, 2013, 07:33:40 AM
Generally speaking it wouldn't surprise me if this was the case.
Speaking just for myself, I was definitely a more sensitive child than the other boys in school and generally found them loud and obnoxious to be around, as a result I did isolate myself for a spell but ultimately gave in and developed (as you say) a male shell. This I think had the affect that I would often appear a bit cold and distant to people, went to far in the other direction to compensate kind of thing. It wasn't really until I moved to a new place, and met new people that I started to let that side of myself out again. But I think I'm still suppressing myself quite a lot in day to day life right now, as is probably evidenced by how much more girly I am when drunk.
Yep, that's pretty much me too. So might be some basis to it.
There have been studies of cisgendered children that conclude that girls are in fact more sensitive to boys
well men tend to be abit more agressive due to the testrostrorone leve, but for children I dont really think you can say one or another is more sensetive or not than the other.
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the studies says so, maybe?, However I dont think you can count on this.
why?
because alot of genderstudies dont consider the fact that we got gender-norms on how we expect each other to behave also of children.
boys can be scolded for being less agressive and feel they have to, girls can be scold for being too agressive or boylike and by those facts they can try to fit in to roles as how there parrents and others would like them if there teached this is wrong.
sure people who test this would try not to make pressure but its already there from sociaty unless the kids have been raised gender neutral which most still arn't.
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Quote from: Annah on February 02, 2013, 04:15:56 AM
I don't know about "sensitive" per say but from my traveling Hobbit experiences, the MTF crowd are def the most "argumentative" than any other group of people I have ever met lol.
Oh yeah? Wanna argue about it?! :icon_boxing:
In short, I for one am not too sensitive. I make humor out of everything. For example, I once split my foot in half and wrapped it in a makeshift pressure bandage (sock). At the hospital, one nurse was wearing a key chain that said, "Ask me if I washed my hands today." I asked, "Did you wash your hands today?"
I also asked if anyone had any oxy-clean to get that tough stain out of my sock. :laugh:
Quote from: Annah on February 02, 2013, 04:15:56 AM
I don't know about "sensitive" per say but from my traveling Hobbit experiences, the MTF crowd are def the most "argumentative" than any other group of people I have ever met lol.
Put 10 MTF in a room, close the door, and wait 2 hours. It's like a reenactment of a battle scene from "BraveHeart."
I could not agree more with this^^^^ In my opinion we are the most cantankerous, self centered, self absorbed, hypercritical bunch of people...yeah...I blame it on society... >:-) :laugh: :laugh: :angel:
I guess it's possible, but it doesn't really go the other way. You're not going to identify a trans person by finding an overly sensitive guy. I'm quite certain that my grandfather is not trans, but he's even more sensitive than I am and he's very open with it too. Some people are just more sensitive than others.
this could be true. i was always the do as your told kind of kid. i did as others told me always cried and wined. my mom swore i was such a little girl.
The only generalization I can make about trans people is that our variety and differences are greater than the cis population. For instance, having a differently gendered brain seems to make it more likely that you will have other forms of brain difference, whether that is adhd, ocd, high intelligence, anxiety/depression (organic), musical or artistic gifts, autistic spectrum, synesthesia, nonbinary gender stuff, bi- or pansexuality, asexuality, anorexia, addictive tendencies, high or low emotional sensitivity etc etc and to come from families in which those differences are more common. Then on the socialization side, we tend to share traits that develop in response to our common experiences as trans kids or adults: dysphoria, anxiety/depression (situational), isolation, loneliness, emotional/physical/sexual abuse, ptsd, addictions (self medicating), eating disorders, overcompensation...
All that said, I am a mtf of extraordinarily high emotional and spiritual sensitivity so many of my closest friends are the same. But all personalities and natures are welcome here. Variety is the spice of life, and trans folks come in a million wonderful and unique flavors. Be yourself. Live your gender in a way that fits you, and embrace all the otger unique and ordinary things about yourself. Then live and love.
Quote from: agfrommd on February 02, 2013, 08:26:30 AM
I've always thought the "our minds are female" assertion is a simplification.
The parts of our mind that informs us of our gender, definitely female.
But for me, I think the rest of my mind is decidedly male. The way I solve problems, my social impulses, very male. I can compartmentalize my feelings easily in a way that a lot of females find difficult. My first impulse is to solve the problem not to be concerned about the feelings of those involved.
I've had to learn the the female "way" of doing things. Oddly through most of that time, I didn't even know I was trans, just knew that I wanted to make myself as female as I could. But it's been hard. I still find myself falling back sometimes into behaviors that are stereotypically male despite my best efforts.
Even some cis women are built that way. One of my best friends is a cis female but she often gives logical advice And sees things in terms of problems to solve, rather than considering peoples feelings and trying to empathise why they might feel that way. Yet I was raised as male, but I'm probably more tender in this respect in comparison.
Quote from: agfrommd on February 02, 2013, 08:26:30 AM
I've always thought the "our minds are female" assertion is a simplification.
The parts of our mind that informs us of our gender, definitely female.
But for me, I think the rest of my mind is decidedly male. The way I solve problems, my social impulses, very male. I can compartmentalize my feelings easily in a way that a lot of females find difficult. My first impulse is to solve the problem not to be concerned about the feelings of those involved.
I've had to learn the the female "way" of doing things. Oddly through most of that time, I didn't even know I was trans, just knew that I wanted to make myself as female as I could. But it's been hard. I still find myself falling back sometimes into behaviors that are stereotypically male despite my best efforts.
After all, we were raised and socialized as males.
Anyway I don't want to be female (I already am), I want to be me. If anybody consider that my behavior is stereotypically male it's their problem, not mine.
Transsexualism is not about stereotyping genres.
I cant say *sensitive* but i can say emotional.Men and woman were both created for their own purpose.Men being the strong arm,foundation,firm,one in control,the head and the support,while woman were created to be the even scale.Loving,the breast,the roof of that foundation,comfort,and motherly.of course this does and can vary but our hormones *in my opinion* is what has set us within that position.Men are the strength and brains while woman are the heart and soul.but this is how i see it.