Regina
Wife
Answers From the Wife of a Transgender Woman
Posted: 02/05/2013 6:49 pm
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/regina/answers-from-the-wife-of-a-transgender-woman_b_2625911.html?utm_hp_ref=gay-voices (http://www.huffingtonpost.com/regina/answers-from-the-wife-of-a-transgender-woman_b_2625911.html?utm_hp_ref=gay-voices)
After reading the comments from HuffPost users Sue Langland and Shannon Barber on the Erin Ryan Fitzgerald story, I knew I needed to answer them, so I'm writing this blog post as a response to them.
My spouse, Jean, transitioned about 11 years ago. We've been together for 16 years and will celebrate our 14th wedding anniversary this spring. This has been a long journey for both of us.
We've had a very strong bond since the first time we laid eyes on each other. We're two halves that make a whole. This is not a bond that comes around very often. We literally complete each other.
To answer Sue's question about "maleness" is difficult. I mourned losing Gene when he first started talking about transition. I was scared out of my mind, as well. What is going to happen with us? Can I be strong enough to help him through this? Can I even get through this? These were just a few of the questions that went through my mind when he first told me he needed to pursue transition.
[...]
As for the "maleness" part of her, it really didn't exist until she thought she had to be the husband. It's really difficult to explain, because I fell in love with her female soul, not her outer male self. I looked into her eyes and knew that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with this wonderful person who cherished me for who I was, who didn't want me to change who I was. As for the sex part of our relationship, I don't think we really counted on that to create the bond we had.