I want to start a journal. It's a way that I cab express myself and say truly how I feel about everything. However, I haveno idea how to start or mantain it. Does anyone know of any questions to ask yourself in a journal or any journal prompts regarding gender identity issues?
Joey
There's no such thing as a wrong way, but here is a thought.
A shrink can confirm this too, if you WRITE it down on paper, and then read it, it is a lot more real to your brain than just pondering it in your head.
So regardless of printed on paper or printed into an online option like a blog, you want it to be where you can re read it easily too.
I suggest a bit of both. Get a decent journal at an office supply retailer and write in it daily. Tell yourself you require a single page of thoughts each day. And also indulge something like Blogspot.com, and merely leave it private and not shared for your own uses.
Not that public is bad, but you don't really need it to be public as it is for you at any rate.
I've always found it hard to force myself to write in a journal. I just write in mine when I'm feeling really really awful and have no one to talk to. I just try to put those feelings into words. Works to pull me out of those really dark places my mind has a tendency to go...
I can't write what I feel in a journal just anytime, I have to be emotionally overwhelmed. If it's writing fiction, sure. But when it comes to gender dysphoria and things of that nature, inspiration has to strike. And looking back through my journals, I get a clearer sense of my struggles, so it's definitely useful. I think the best way to start is just when you have a lot of feelings you want to get out just to be comfortable with writing to yourself basically. It also helps to think of it like writing it to somebody, but they'll never be able to read it, it feels less awkward that way. And if you want to do it regularly, then build yourself up to it. Make it a habit.
As for questions to ask, I generally just write down whatever comes to mind without analyzing it. That's when you get down to all the deep dark stuff that you don't even realize you're thinking. I know I've surprised myself
I love journaling. I find it's best to start by getting yourself a really nice pen and a really nice looking journal that you'll enjoy holding (I like ledgers).
You can always start by pretending that you're writing a letter to a stranger, but I enjoy just going right into things and not bothering to explain anything (I think it's too tedious and gets boring to explain things to myself that I already know, like "oh and I once dated this guy who smelled really bad".) It's also fun to just draw pictures whenever you feel like it, or paste in photos or newspaper clippings.
However, I don't journal anymore because someone read mine even though he knew not to. I was so upset by it that I threw them away and will never journal again. :(
I journal every day. It's a great way to open up. When I started mine, I was a bit afraid that someone would find it, so I was really censoring my thoughts. Over time, I stopped doing that. I just blurt out whatever happens to be on my mind at the time. I write an entry as soon as I wake up, then at random times throughout the day as I think of something that I consider important. I write everything down, whether it's trans-related or not. You never know what detail of your life that seems insignificant could wind up being a major detail related to whatever your reason for journaling is.
Eventually you'll start to see patterns (around 2 months in for me) of things that are always on your mind that you may not have realized. It really helped me to isolate the thoughts that were dragging me down and find a way to address them.
Jey
The first thing you need to decide is, who is going to see it.
If it will be private then you naturally have a lot more freedom to say things. But if you intend others to see it, then you will feel more self conscious.
In the latter case, it is really important to find an edge, from which to approach what you say. An essential attitude to shield yourself from some of the more nasty and critical responses you think you will get.
For example, if your journal is to be about your transgender journey.
You could start from a perspective of someone, born male, but raised as female, who now wishes to / needs to transision to male. Everyone knows you as female and sees you as such. You need to get them to see you as male without revealing you were actually born that way.
Why? The reason is, you have to have a front door, which you can shut when you need to.