Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Transsexual talk => Female to male transsexual talk (FTM) => Topic started by: Liminal Stranger on March 10, 2013, 08:21:46 PM

Title: Feeling Kind of Bound
Post by: Liminal Stranger on March 10, 2013, 08:21:46 PM
I really need a binder, and several people have been extremely kind and offered one...but the problem isn't really getting the money to buy one. It's getting it into my house without my parents murdering me (no not literally...I hope).

Already I'm jumping through hoops to keep anyone from finding the new boxers I got, because I'll be damned if they're going to make me wear girl undergarments. But my chest dysphoria is really high as of late. I just want to go out of my house and not worry about what shirt I'm wearing :c

Right now I'm using two control-top tights, one for compression and the other to put a softer material and make the feeling of the chest less suspicious, so they kind of feel like regular moobs or something. But I don't want moobs. I want a flat chest without having lines being cut into my shoulders where the straps are.

Guys with unsupportive parents, if you ever got a binder, how'd you get it into the house? I'm thinking P.O. box, but that's going to cost more money and I'm trying to spend as little as possible. If I can get something on Amazon and have a friend get the package, that's a possibility, but I don't know at this point...
Title: Re: Feeling Kind of Bound
Post by: Natkat on March 10, 2013, 08:28:08 PM
when I where younger and my parrent wasnt suportive of my transition, I used to wear a big hoody like xxlarge, and generally walk with my pockets in. if your having A or a Bcup its probably abit more easy than a C.

Title: Re: Feeling Kind of Bound
Post by: Contravene on March 10, 2013, 09:59:28 PM
I haven't been able to buy a binder yet because of the same parent problem so I feel your pain.

I was looking for similar advice when I came across a YouTube video that suggested first buying a Visa or American Express gift card in the amount you'll need to cover the cost of your binder and the shipping fee. The gift card acts the same way a credit card would so you can buy things on various websites without having to worry about the purchase showing up on your bank statement which is something that people tend to forget about. I don't know about your parents but mine have access to my bank account and the bank statements I receive so seeing some of my purchases would raise their suspicions. Then the video suggested buying the binder with the gift card the same way you would with a regular credit card and having it sent to a friend's house where you can pick it up.

If you can't find any friends who are willing to have the package sent to them, you should be able to call the post office and ask them to hold the package that you're expecting so that you can go to pick it up right at the post office rather than having it sent straight to your house.

Of course, things will vary depending on where you live but hopefully those suggestions will help a little. If you use the gift card method, you'll probably also want to be sure that the place you're buying your binder from will accept those types of cards so you won't be stuck with a 50 dollar or more gift card and nothing to spend it on. That's happened to me before, unfortunately.
Title: Re: Feeling Kind of Bound
Post by: tomthom on March 10, 2013, 10:44:14 PM
yeah, just have a friend recieve it or the post office as stated before. No big deal really.
Title: Re: Feeling Kind of Bound
Post by: King Malachite on March 11, 2013, 12:01:22 AM
Quote from: Contravene on March 10, 2013, 09:59:28 PM
I haven't been able to buy a binder yet because of the same parent problem so I feel your pain.

I was looking for similar advice when I came across a YouTube video that suggested first buying a Visa or American Express gift card in the amount you'll need to cover the cost of your binder and the shipping fee. The gift card acts the same way a credit card would so you can buy things on various websites without having to worry about the purchase showing up on your bank statement which is something that people tend to forget about. I don't know about your parents but mine have access to my bank account and the bank statements I receive so seeing some of my purchases would raise their suspicions. Then the video suggested buying the binder with the gift card the same way you would with a regular credit card and having it sent to a friend's house where you can pick it up.

If you can't find any friends who are willing to have the package sent to them, you should be able to call the post office and ask them to hold the package that you're expecting so that you can go to pick it up right at the post office rather than having it sent straight to your house.

Of course, things will vary depending on where you live but hopefully those suggestions will help a little. If you use the gift card method, you'll probably also want to be sure that the place you're buying your binder from will accept those types of cards so you won't be stuck with a 50 dollar or more gift card and nothing to spend it on. That's happened to me before, unfortunately.

This.  You can find them at almost any mall in the U.S.

That's how I purchased my Mr. Limpy.  I don't have a bank account so loaded Visas are perfect for me.  When my packer arrived, my mom asked what was it and I said it was a video game lol.  Maybe you could try to swing it as something else?