Kia Ora,
Well what do you think this one key ingredient would/could be ?
Metta Zenda :)
not having a penis.
hm. I guess being born androgynous. in all ways. voice, looks, bone structure. it's rare, but when it happens it's gorgeous on it's own, and it would be nice to have a malleable template.
Quote from: tomthom on March 15, 2013, 09:56:22 PM
not having a penis.
hm. I guess being born androgynous. in all ways. voice, looks, bone structure. it's rare, but when it happens it's gorgeous on it's own, and it would be nice to have a malleable template.
Kia Ora Tomthom,
That's a good answer, but not a thread prize winner I'm afraid... ;)
Metta Zenda :)
Well in my opinion, there IS one.
It's called brutally honest and open therapy. Every ounce of success comes out of you knowing EXACTLY who you are. No BS applied or hidden behind.
Without that understanding everything else is built on sand, if you're lucky, not rock that success stands on.
You can have as much FFS as your heart desires. Fine clothing till your wardrobe overflows, the most perfect surgery ever. The best hair created, most expensive make up made; but if you ain't got it inside, and are still muddled up, it ain't worth a dime.
I'll get off my pulpit now.
<* Cheers arise from the throng*>
Quote from: Catherine Sarah on March 15, 2013, 10:12:16 PM
Well in my opinion, there IS one.
It's called brutally honest and open therapy. Every ounce of success comes out of you knowing EXACTLY who you are. No BS applied or hidden behind.
Without that understanding everything else is built on sand, if you're lucky, not rock that success stands on.
You can have as much FFS as your heart desires. Fine clothing till your wardrobe overflows, the most perfect surgery ever. The best hair created, most expensive make up made; but if you ain't got it inside, and are still muddled up, it ain't worth a dime.
I'll get off my pulpit now.
<* Cheers arise from the throng*>
Kia Ora Catherine,
And thanks for the sweet sermon.. :icon_bunch:.
Well I must say I thought for one minute you had it sown up, but no, you were close but not quite close enough... ;) But good answer though...
Metta Zenda :)
Quote from: tomthom on March 15, 2013, 09:56:22 PM
not having a penis.
for me it's having a fully functional penis
Cash!
Quote from: Malachite on March 15, 2013, 10:43:12 PM
for me it's having a fully functional penis
Kia Ora M,
That was one of Tomthom's prize losing downfalls, with the answer that she gave ;) ;D
Metta Zenda :)
Quote from: ~RoadToTrista~ on March 15, 2013, 10:45:38 PM
Cash!
Kia Ora Trista,
Money might not always buy 'success'...However it can help heaps, but it's still not the answer...
Metta Zenda :)
the penis part was just a joke. I'll elaborate when I'm serious :P
wait. wait. I just thought of the best transition ingredient. being a clownfish. sex changes are just natural to them when it's needed :D
Confidence.
Quote from: Misato33 on March 15, 2013, 11:42:52 PM
Confidence.
it's no fun getting right to the nitty gritty.
100% self acceptance.. Oh, and a sense of humour..
Buttermilk.
No, wait.... that's waffles.
Hi
Its a must,, To accept who you are what you are & be who you are,
I did at age 10 & thats where i am now, NO 2nd quessing no doughts & no regretes & then you can live life & love life ,To live life you need to be part of it ,
...noeleena..
hmmm one ingredient for a successful transition.. let me think about it a bit..
open-mindedness
In order to be happy, preferably everyone you love will accept you. So if there was more open mindedness, then more people would dbe ok with you transitioning and not hold it against you, think of you as gross, and still love you! If everyone in the world was openminded, the only thing you have to deal with is transition. I feel like it is harder cause not only do you have to deal with transition, but you have to deal with hateful people.. it would be so much easier if other people understood.
Quote from: Shodan on March 16, 2013, 01:02:22 AM
Buttermilk.
No, wait.... that's waffles.
Kia Ora Shodan,
Ah now that's sweet ;) ;D
Metta Zenda :)
Kia Ora,
Thanks for your 'thought provoking' responses ...In a sense all the answers put together so far, are on the right track...
Here's a clue:
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
Or a somewhat cryptic clue:
"If you correct your mind-the rest of your life will fall into place!"
Metta Zenda :)
Kia Ora
Your answers so far, all deserve a rep "✓" Well done...
Metta Zenda :)
Hormones and patience
Quote from: calico on March 16, 2013, 02:49:40 AM
Hormones and "patience"
Kia Ora Calico,
You're on the right track, but not quite there :)
BTW Patience is an important part, but the key ingredient incorporates this...
Metta Zenda :)
Devlyn dear - Where are you??? I need your help, please!!!
Presence & humility
Quote from: Catherine Sarah on March 16, 2013, 03:10:00 AM
Devlyn dear - Where are you??? I need your help, please!!!
Presence & humility
Kia Ora Catherine,
:icon_no: I have Devlyn tied up in my basement dungeon :icon_twisted: >:-) ...So who ya gonna call now ? >:-)
Metta Zenda :)
You need a transitioner!
Quote from: Kuan Yin on March 16, 2013, 03:20:16 AM
Kia Ora Catherine,
:icon_no: I have Devlyn tied up in my basement dungeon :icon_twisted: >:-) ...So who ya gonna call now ? >:-)
Metta Zenda :)
BUGGER!!!! ;D
Sooooo Presence and humility didn't wash eh?
May I beg upon your eternal mercy and good looks and add some vowels to the existing clues. Please? Pretty please with sugar on top?
Sometimes brutal honesty in therapy isn't enough to ensure that you should transition. There are numerous articles on the web about people being honest, then honestly finding that they should have never done it. Someone else already said what I believe is the one key ingredient (although I haven't done it myself yet) and that's 100% self acceptance. Brutal honesty in therapy doesn't get you that. It gets you an honest opinion from your therapist. Your opinion is the only one that counts in this.
Quote from: Catherine Sarah on March 16, 2013, 07:31:17 AM
BUGGER!!!! ;D
Sooooo Presence and humility didn't wash eh?
May I beg upon your eternal mercy and good looks and add some vowels to the existing clues. Please? Pretty please with sugar on top?
Kia Ora Catherine,
No, but here's a couple of vowels...
A [as in, having 'a' something.something] _ _ _ _ _ _ _ E _ _ _ _ _ _ _ E ..... [Blimey Catherine, do I need to spell it out for ya !] ;) ;D
The cryptic clue again [a clue within a clue]
"If you correct your mind-the rest of your life will fall into place!"When the answer is revealed, some might argue the toss, but if they really think about it, one really can't "successfully" transition[that is, live a happy and contented life] without "having one" [that's another clue BTW] ;)
Metta Zenda :)
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on March 16, 2013, 07:09:23 AM
You need a transitioner!
Kia Ora Devlyn,
I see you escaped...So, where does one buy a 'transitioner' ? At Walmart ? ;) ;D
Metta Zenda :)
Vowels you buy, transitioners are priceless! Hugs, Devlyn
A wise mind or the right view according to buddhism...
"Our happiness and the happiness of those around us depend on our degree of Right View. Touching reality deeply -- knowing what is going on inside and outside of ourselves -- is the way to liberate ourselves from the suffering that is caused by wrong perceptions."
Zen Teacher Thich Nhat Hanh
Quote from: Sky-Blue on March 16, 2013, 01:31:48 PM
A wise mind or the "right view" according to buddhism...
"Our happiness and the happiness of those around us depend on our degree of "Right View". Touching reality deeply -- knowing what is going on inside and outside of ourselves -- is the way to liberate ourselves from the suffering that is caused by wrong perceptions."
Zen Teacher Thich Nhat Hanh
Kia Ora Sky Blue,
In a sense this is the perfect answer, but I guess non Buddhists may not be thinking a long those lines...So the answer I'm looking for is more in line with every day speech...
Metta Zenda :)
Balls,the bigger the better!
Try to stay positive, and if something happens don't worry just take it one day at a time.
Quote from: Sky-Blue on March 16, 2013, 02:38:27 PM
Try to stay "positive", and if something happens don't worry just take it one day at a time.
Kia Ora Sky Blue,
You're almost there...Having 'one' tends to allow one to be more "adaptable" and more "flexible" when dealing with life's challenges...
Metta Zenda :)
Quote from: Kuan Yin on March 16, 2013, 03:53:39 PM
Kia Ora Sky Blue,
You're almost there...Having 'one' tends to allow one to be more "adaptable" and more "flexible" when dealing with life's challenges...
Metta Zenda :)
An optimistic/realistic mindset?
I'm tempted to let other people guess...I feel like I've used up all my guesses...
Quote from: big kim on March 16, 2013, 02:12:40 PM
Balls,the bigger the better!
Kia Ora Big kim,
::) For the non op M2F and the F2M who wants some this could be true[in the colloquial sense="have you got the 'Balls' !"] ;) ;D
But you deserve a rep for your efforts ;)
Metta Zenda :)
Quote from: Kuan Yin on March 15, 2013, 09:54:44 PM
Kia Ora,
Well what do you think this one key ingredient would/could be ?
Metta Zenda :)
A positive attitude...Learn the song, "Que Sera, Sera"...And take it to heart.
Doris Day - Que Sera, Sera (Whatever Will Be Will Be) (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SdhAfMor9BM#)
Quote from: Sky-Blue on March 16, 2013, 03:59:45 PM
An optimistic/realistic mindset?
I'm tempted to let other people guess...I feel like I've used up all my guesses...
Kia Ora Sky Blue,
So close...all the words you have used including 'positive' tend to make up the key ingredient...
" OpTomIsTic/re
AlisTic minDs
Et plus there's a letter "U" in amongst the other letters that make up the word
Metta Zenda :)
Quote from: Beth Andrea on March 16, 2013, 04:11:43 PM
A positive attitude...Learn the song, "Que Sera, Sera"...And take it to heart.
Doris Day - Que Sera, Sera (Whatever Will Be Will Be) (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SdhAfMor9BM#)
Kia Ora Beth,
Well done you've scored a hole in one...Spoil sport! I was beginning to enjoy this ;) ;D But "Que Sera Sera!"
Metta Zenda :)
Transparent motivation. When you know there is hard work ahead of you, but the energy comes from within because the goal is innately understood & internally sought after on a subconscious level.. After you take the red pill, just hold on... Trust yourself and let your mind be free to take you wherever it wants- it will give you all that you need along the way.
Quote from: Jennygirl on March 16, 2013, 04:31:41 PM
Transparent motivation. When you know there is hard work ahead of you, but the energy comes from within because the goal is innately understood & internally sought after on a subconscious level.. After you take the red pill, just hold on... Trust yourself and let your mind be free to take you wherever it wants- it will give you all that you need along the way.
Yes. I like this.
Quote from: Jennygirl on March 16, 2013, 04:31:41 PM
Transparent motivation. When you know there is hard work ahead of you, but the energy comes from within because the goal is innately understood & internally sought after on a subconscious level.. After you take the red pill, just hold on... Trust yourself and let your mind be free to take you wherever it wants- it will give you all that you need along the way.
Kia Ora Jenny,
That's true...There are so many Ingredients for success, and having a positive attitude tend to encompass all the qualities needed...Ie adaptability, flexibility, Willingness To Tackle Challenges, Being Hopeful About the Future
Identify the Good In the Bad...
Having a "Can-Do" Attitude !
Metta Zenda :)
Quote from: Kuan Yin on March 16, 2013, 01:13:47 PM
A [as in, having 'a' something.something] _ _ _ _ _ _ _ E _ _ _ _ _ _ _ E ..... [Blimey Catherine, do I need to spell it out for ya !] ;) ;D
Sorry Hun. Yes please, Catherine is having yet again one of her very frequent blonde moments :laugh: :laugh:
Jeans. A good pair of jeans. Damn, a pair makes two.
Quote from: Catherine Sarah on March 16, 2013, 05:57:08 PM
Sorry Hun. Yes please, Catherine is having yet again one of her very frequent blonde moments :laugh: :laugh:
Kia Ora Catherine,
:rolleyes: OK, ok, just this once, seeing that you're an Aussie [a bit slow on the up take] ;) :D.... "P o s i t i v e A t t i t u d e" or as they say in France "Adopter une attitude positive" Or Monty Python "Always look on the bright side of life"
Metta Zenda :)
Quote from: Tesla on March 16, 2013, 06:37:25 PM
Jeans Genes. A good pair of jeans genes. Damn, a pair makes two.
Kia Ora Tesla,
Almost, but not quite the right spelling ...A good pair of
jeans "genes" would/could help too ;) :D
Metta Zenda :)
My answer may seem unexpected to those who know I am one of the most consistently positive attituded people ever born.
But I've seen plenty of people fail, or even perish, with positive attitudes to the end. Holding onto a positive attitude, through all of life's vicissitudes, is one of the warning signs of the people who surprise you when they don't make it. I almost died from my positive attitude.
Why? Because life is hard, and often unfair, and we all make mistakes, and even when we don't, we may not be able to realize our fondest dreams, or some times, even our most minimal expectations.
One of my hardest learned lessons, as someone who always had a positive attitude, is that being human is more important, being real is more important, and reaching out for help when life makes it impossible to hold a positive attitude, is more important, than any thing in our own minds, including the positive or negative color we put on the lines that life shows us.
In fact, if I was asked this:
If There Was One Key Ingredient For A Successful Transition, What Would It Be ?
My answer without equivocation would be:
To realize and accept that there is no one key ingredient for a successful transition.
There isn't, in fact, only one successful transition, let alone one key ingredient to one, and the ingredients for all our successful transitions, gender and otherwise, need to vary as our lives and needs vary.
Every day.
But if I could give one piece of advice, I would say:
As much as you are able, keep it real, be kind to yourself, and if at all possible, try not to do it alone.
The rest will come in time if you don't give up.
-Maddie
Quote from: MadelineB on March 16, 2013, 11:59:40 PM
My answer may seem unexpected to those who know I am one of the most consistently positive attituded people ever born.
But I've seen plenty of people fail, or even perish, with positive attitudes to the end. Holding onto a positive attitude, through all of life's vicissitudes, is one of the warning signs of the people who surprise you when they don't make it. I almost died from my positive attitude.
Why? Because life is hard, and often unfair, and we all make mistakes, and even when we don't, we may not be able to realize our fondest dreams, or some times, even our most minimal expectations.
One of my hardest learned lessons, as someone who always had a positive attitude, is that being human is more important, being real is more important, and reaching out for help when life makes it impossible to hold a positive attitude, is more important, than any thing in our own minds, including the positive or negative color we put on the lines that life shows us.
In fact, if I was asked this:
If There Was One Key Ingredient For A Successful Transition, What Would It Be ?
My answer without equivocation would be:
To realize and accept that there is no one key ingredient for a successful transition.
There isn't, in fact, only one successful transition, let alone one key ingredient to one, and the ingredients for all our successful transitions, gender and otherwise, need to vary as our lives and needs vary.
Every day.
But if I could give one piece of advice, I would say:
As much as you are able, keep it real, be kind to yourself, and if at all possible, try not to do it alone.
The rest will come in time if you don't give up.
-Maddie
Kia Ora MadelineB,
For me the last sentence translates to stay "
positive"
However, I know exactly what you mean... In my work I too see this "pseudo" positive attitude, which on the surface looks 'real' enough, in fact they start to believe it themselves, but for the most part they are just in denial by masking problems with a painted smile, all the while hoping their problems will go away on their own...Eventually it all catches up with them and their world comes crashing down around them...
I guess the term positive attitude can differ from person to person , but for me it
encompasses more than what you have mentioned...It doesn't mean going it alone, without relying on others...Along with other things, it means you are 'confident' enough to reach out and seek out help...
Also some people who attempt to "Fake it till they make it" often come unstuck for the simple reason their 'attitude' is not 'positive' in the sense of it being "adaptable" and "flexible" and nor are they 'realistic'...
One must work on creating a real positive attitude, if one wants to maintain a level of contentment-no matter what life throws at them....
So Positive attitude=Adaptable-flexible-optimistic-"REALISTIC"- Know your limits-And don't be afraid to seek out help when you need it...
Metta Zenda :)
Quote from: Kuan Yin on March 16, 2013, 08:43:30 PM
Kia Ora Catherine,
:rolleyes: OK, ok, just this once, seeing that you're an Aussie [a bit slow on the up take] ;) :D.... "P o s i t i v e A t t i t u d e" or as they say in France "Adopter une attitude positive" Or Monty Python "Always look on the bright side of life"
Metta Zenda :)
T h a n k
Y o o o u u u u u oooNow let's not complicate the issue by going to French, other wise I'll have to throw my Positivum Attitude (latin) or Atteggiamento positivo at you. Hopefully it won't fall and break anything.
Although Beth may have taken out line honours, it looks like Maddie took the first place with complete with trophy. with her: (well done girl)
Quote from: MadelineB on March 16, 2013, 11:59:40 PM
My answer may seem unexpected to those who know I am one of the most consistently positive attituded people ever born.
But I've seen plenty of people fail, or even perish, with positive attitudes to the end. Holding onto a positive attitude, through all of life's vicissitudes, is one of the warning signs of the people who surprise you when they don't make it. I almost died from my positive attitude.
Why? Because life is hard, and often unfair, and we all make mistakes, and even when we don't, we may not be able to realize our fondest dreams, or some times, even our most minimal expectations.
One of my hardest learned lessons, as someone who always had a positive attitude, is that being human is more important, being real is more important, and reaching out for help when life makes it impossible to hold a positive attitude, is more important, than any thing in our own minds, including the positive or negative color we put on the lines that life shows us.
In fact, if I was asked this:
If There Was One Key Ingredient For A Successful Transition, What Would It Be ?
My answer without equivocation would be:
To realize and accept that there is no one key ingredient for a successful transition.
There isn't, in fact, only one successful transition, let alone one key ingredient to one, and the ingredients for all our successful transitions, gender and otherwise, need to vary as our lives and needs vary.
Every day.
But if I could give one piece of advice, I would say:
As much as you are able, keep it real, be kind to yourself, and if at all possible, try not to do it alone.
The rest will come in time if you don't give up.
-Maddie
Quote from: Catherine Sarah on March 18, 2013, 11:49:14 PM
T h a n k
Y o o o u u u u u ooo
Now let's not complicate the issue by going to French, other wise I'll have to throw my Positivum Attitude (latin) or Atteggiamento positivo at you. Hopefully it won't fall and break anything.
Although Beth may have taken out line honours, it looks like Maddie took the first place with complete with trophy. with her: (well done girl)
Kia Ora Catherine,
Thanks for pointing this out, I have given Maddie a well deserved rep for her approach to the question...
Metta Zenda :)
If there were one sure ingredient to a successful transition I think it would be the fortitude to be able to go thru the harder parts of transition and still being able to remind yourself of the endgoal which may by your lifelong dream and the happiness that lays there at the end of the rainbow. And to be able to push through even if you feel alone and to smile at every turn. And most importantly to let go of the past and to forgive yourself for whatever you have done because soon if when one completes transition you'll be a brand new beautiful butterfly that has burst forth from the larvae stage, to fly away.
*Thinks of one of her favorite songs*
The Caterpillar (Girl) - The Cure
The Cure - The Caterpillar (Live in Japan 1984) (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VYWcCRhdClY#)
Hi Joanna,
Quote from: Joanna Dark on April 20, 2013, 03:44:21 AM
If there were one sure ingredient to a successful transition I think it would be the fortitude to be able to go thru the harder parts of transition and still being able to remind yourself of the endgoal which may by your lifelong dream and the happiness that lays there at the end of the rainbow. And to be able to push through even if you feel alone and to smile at every turn. And most importantly to let go of the past and to forgive yourself for whatever you have done because soon if when one completes transition you'll be a brand new beautiful butterfly that has burst forth from the larvae stage, to fly away.
I'm looking for the "LIKE" button on your most provocative answer to the question. Because I'd like to press it, several thousand times.
When one looks up the meaning of fortitude, you find not only the meaning of a word, but you find an absolute meaning to life.
Fortitude: Strength of mind that enables one to endure adversity with courage.
I think you've found the secret to life.
Huggs
Catherine
Quote from: Catherine Sarah on April 20, 2013, 08:19:28 AM
Fortitude: Strength of mind that enables one to endure adversity with courage.
Kia Ora Catherine,
One should never leave home without it !
"If you correct your mind, the rest of your life will fall into place !"Metta Zenda :)
Tell that to my facial hair. It does not seem to listen whatsoever.
Quote from: Kuan Yin on April 20, 2013, 02:41:31 PMKia Ora Trista,
Money might not always buy 'success'...However it can help heaps, but it's still not the answer...
Metta Zenda :)
So you ask people what THEY think is the "one key ingredient," and then when they tell you, you decide that they're wrong? Screw that. Why not just open the thread with your "correct" answer and then not even ask the question in the first place? Then everybody's happy.
My answer is also money. I already know what I want and need. I just lack the funds.
Act natural and not too hard trying to be feminine....a deadgiveaway because it looks (and sounds) silly.
Given that transition can mean so many things to so many people, the only thing I can think which would be essential in pretty much every case would be personal integrity.
Quote from: Arch on April 21, 2013, 04:21:31 AM
So you ask people what THEY think is the "one key ingredient," and then when they tell you, you decide that they're wrong? Screw that. Why not just open the thread with your "correct" answer and then not even ask the question in the first place? Then everybody's happy.
My answer is also money. I already know what I want and need. I just lack the funds.
Kia Ora Arch,
Now where would the fun be in that... ;) ;D
Mtta Zenda :)
Quote from: Kuan Yin on April 22, 2013, 12:12:58 AM
Now where would the fun be in that... ;) ;D
Exactly. Why ask an honest question and take people's opinions as they are, when you can lord it over people instead?
Quote from: Arch on April 22, 2013, 01:16:54 AM
Exactly. Why ask an honest question and take people's opinions as they are, when you can lord it over people instead?
Kia Ora Arch,
Sorry, but I not sure where you're coming from Arch...
I'm just expressing a light hearted sense of humour....On a personal level, people have a right to their opinions...
So to all that read and have commented on this thread.... a word of advice...Don't take what I write too seriously,when it comes to my response to your posts, in other words don't take it to heart...Lighten up...
I hope no other posters were offended by my comments...
Metta Zenda :)
Quote from: Kuan Yin on April 22, 2013, 01:33:56 AM
I hope no other posters were offended by my comments...
Metta Zenda :)
Not at all
Start early in life before the T does all the damage!!!!!
Mine is a middle life late change & so frustrating. I doubt my body will ever become feminine.
A flagrant disregard for good sense...
Quote from: Catherine Sarah on April 22, 2013, 06:25:47 AM
Not at all
Kia Ora Catherine,
Thanks, that's good to hear....
It can be quite hard at times, with all the different nationalities and our different approach to humour, be it dry, witty, bland, black, etc...
For the most part I'm 'smiling' when I write my comments, but one can't always see this in the words...
Metta Zenda :)
In my honest opinion, the most important key ingredient is self-acceptance. Complete self-acceptance. Don't go into transition looking for validation, looking for baby angels to fall out of the sky and give you a perfect state of mind that magically fixes all of your problems. Because it won't. You need to have a conviction, on a deep down level, that this really is who you are, and accept that self fully. Because there will be highs and lows. There will be doubts. And there will be both days where it feels like the entire universe is lined up just perfectly, and days where you just want to lay in bed crying all day because it seems so hard, so far away, and such a difficult road.
The way to deal with these things is complete self-acceptance. Don't look at the highs as being validation that transition is right for you, and don't look at the lows as meaning that you're making a mistake. Because moods will fluctuate. There will be doubts. And if you don't have a strong acceptance of just who you are, getting through these lows will be MUCH harder.
That is my advice, as someone who went through a hell of a lot of this herself before finally coming to a secure place, after much emotional hardship that included both the highest emotional highs of my entire life, and the worst depression of my entire life.
Quote from: Shodan on March 16, 2013, 01:02:22 AM
Buttermilk.
No, wait.... that's waffles.
Like. Lol. ^_^