Thu Mar 21, 2013 at 05:20 AM PDT
My Daughter was Outed by her Middle School Guidance Counselor
by theKgirls
http://www.dailykos.com/story/2013/03/21/1192669/-My-Daughter-was-Outed-by-her-Middle-School-Guidance-Counselor (http://www.dailykos.com/story/2013/03/21/1192669/-My-Daughter-was-Outed-by-her-Middle-School-Guidance-Counselor)
To be fair, the guidance counselor didn't out her to the entire Middle School student body; just to her teachers, teachers that may see her out in the hallways, administrators, the school psychologist, her future high school teachers and administrators, two friends and one set of parents -- and me.
I'm not sure you could describe me as outraged (although that is certainly how I'd describe myself now...) I was probably more stunned. I'm not sure exactly why an 8th grade counselor felt the need to involve herself in a 13 year old's private life in this way.
[...]
Midway through the year, the counselor said she'd like to meet with me and apparently, the only point to the meeting was to tell me that she believes Kgirl may be gay. Um, okay. I wouldn't be surprised, nor will I be upset.
[...]
I was called in for a third meeting and this time Ms Meddler told me that Kgirl is actually Kboy. The first thing Ms Meddler wanted was for me to sign a form for the high school so that she would be registered as a boy when she started there in the fall. She gave me a phone number for Children's Hospital Boston Gender Management Clinic so I could arrange for an evaluation. Up to this point I had been patient and pleasant about this intrusion into our lives. I never wanted Kgirl to think that I was angry about her being gay, so I swallowed my annoyance over and over again. This time I pushed back.
Yes, Kgirl has short hair and she dresses in boy's clothes. In my day, we called that "butch" (Turns out we still do...) Just what in the hell are you basing this on?
This Middle School needs some serious training in how to handle LGBT students, and Ms. Meddler need a little time off work (unpaid) and mandatory training in the same LGBT issues.
Middle school counselors are not qualified as gender or sexuality counselors, and few if any are licensed to conduct family therapy of the sort needed in homes where children are "coming out" as GLBT. VERY VERY definitely, the entire faculty and staff of our middle and high schools need to be trained on GLBT issues, but also strictly admonished against practice of mental health therapy, and to be eternally vigilant of the rights of the students to privacy.