http://www.npr.org/2013/03/30/175682777/gay-marriage-and-the-evolving-language-of-love (http://www.npr.org/2013/03/30/175682777/gay-marriage-and-the-evolving-language-of-love)
Author: Ari Shapiro Source: National Public Radio
With same-sex relationships being more visible in the last few decades, relationship terms have needed an update. Terms like "partner" can sound too formal or businesslike, "lover" may be too explicit, "boy/girlfriend" may sound too immature.
QuoteSteve Kleinedler, executive editor of the American Heritage Dictionary, married his husband in 2004 and then suddenly lost him in a fatal accident five years later.
"The funeral director — very innocently and not meaning to offend at all ... was stymied by the form. She turned to me and says, 'Well, which one of you is the wife?' And you know, I kindly explained, 'No, we're both husbands,' " he says.
A few months earlier, Kleinedler had updated the definitions of "marriage," "husband" and "widower" to encompass same-sex couples. When the new edition of the dictionary came out, Kleinedler saw himself in those words.
Former Representative Barney Frank, D-MA, pointed out that even in heterosexual marriages, gender roles are changing, where the word "wife" or "husband" does necessarily fit the older definitions and expectations of those roles.
-----------------------
I think this is pretty interesting, because what people in same-sex relationships wish to be called seems to vary per couple. Like, some lesbian couples I've heard of both want to be called "wife" while in others one may want to be called "husband". I'll of course call people whatever they perfer, but having some sort of uniformity in the future will definitely be helpful for some things, such as at work a few months ago our secretary had to send a letter to a married lesbian couple and she wasn't sure if she should address the letter to "Mrs. and Mrs. X" or if it should be "Mrs. A and B X" since for a heterosexual couple it's usually "Mr. and Mrs. John Smith". I am also not aways sure when someone says "my partner" (if I don't know them very well and not aware of their sexual orientation) because that's how you also refer to your business partner.