Hello all - I've been lucky enough lately to start meeting a few people who, like me, have non-binary gender identities. It's become so obvious what a frustrating experience it is for us, often feeling isolated and marginalised even within the trans* community, and having extra hurdles to deal with in transitioning.
Because of this, I've decided to launch Non-Binary South West, a peer support group for non-binary trans* folk in the South West of England (though anyone from further afield is welcome to participate). We will soon have a website and forum set up, and we've already started meeting occasionally in Exeter - I'm currently waiting to confirm a safe venue in which to have regular meetings.
In the meantime, anyone who's interested in participating can email us on info@nbsw.org.uk. and I'll add you to the round-robin email list we're using to keep people in touch until the forum is up and running, which should be within the next month. The current membership is small, but a good spread of ages from 20 up to, well, up to me :).
Nice! I'm proud of you for doing this. Hugs, Devlyn
Thanks. I'm a bit amazed at my boldness in getting on with this, but I feel strongly motivated. I'm just getting my head around how to configure and run a forum at the moment, and it's a bit daunting when you have the short attention span that I have. But... excelsior!
Kudos to you, Padma! I'm way too far away to participate, but this is really great.
We now have a nascent website at http://www.nbsw.org.uk - it doesn't do much at the moment except provide our email address for contact, but it's a presence, and it's googlable. Forum to follow once I've got the space to figure out how to set one up.
That sounds amazing! I am up north but would love to drop in if I am ever in that part of the country. I have been trying to get it together to go to a trans* group up here recently but i'm wary of what kind of reception I would receive as non-binary.
Well, you never know what you'll get in support groups, it all depends on the individuals. I think a mixed group would be more receptive - but the trans women's group down here happens to be a very closed-minded collection of people generally, so I felt very marginalised and dismissed, like they just assumed I wasn't seriously transitioning because I didn't want to be a femme woman. There's so much peer pressure to be femme and übergirly. I explained who I was and just got blank looks. That's okay, I don't expect to always meet empathy and understanding, I know I'm a bit out there.
It was the recent experience of meeting several young trans folk here and in Dublin that made me realise what I was missing in terms of getting to commune with other non-binary people, though. And then attending a trans workshop at Exeter Pride last month that was so horribly heteronormative and gender-stereotyping and binarycentric it made my ears bleed is what finally pushed me over the edge into starting this group - that, and the fact that they just weren't listening to the very young trans woman who was there, and were too busy saying "Of course you'll want to do everything exactly like I did." There are currently 6 of us in NBSW, and that's before actually advertising our presence to the community at large. I'm really curious to see who we get, I'm hoping for massive diversity!
Anyway, you'd be very welcome, as and when.
I saw this Non-Binary South West. I got all excited as I am in the Southwest. We spell it together and it means the US desert Southwest (NM, Arizona, etc.)
Haha anyway glad you are doing this across the pond.
But I hope you understand I won't be coming to your meetings. :)
--Jay
Good point, I've updated the original topic title now. You'll be with us in spirit, though (timezones permitting... :) )
Fooling around with ideas for a symbol to represent non-binary - since the ones that already exist out there strike me as too clinical/cold (personal taste). I came up with this idea - it's meant to represent the alchemical transformation of all those stupid venus/mars/cross/arrow/whatever lines into something more indefinable, but very definitely alive. Curious to see what people make of this (it's just an idea I'm playing with).
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.yoxi.net%2Fanitya%2Fflame-circle-small.jpg&hash=ae413c210f63bfcb3f85af79d0b2edf27d8dd9a8)
Try the flames inside the circle. It's what's inside of us that counts.
Ativan
As it happens, I've given up on the flame motif, because apparently it resembles the logos for certain Christian groups of a more fundie nature.
As male is the mars symbol and venus for female, I was went for the symbol of Sun for non-binary. Even had badges at cafe press look like this.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi1.cpcache.com%2Fproduct%2F205906461%2F1_normal_size_androgyne_sun_symbol_type_badge.jpg%3Fheight%3D350%26amp%3Bamp%3Bwidth%3D350&hash=5e5ce0124c55270d03493abab7125252c5a4767c)
That's nice - although it makes me think of Airfix fighter planes :). It has given me an idea though...
Just an update on this group: we now meet on the 1st Saturday of every month from 1-3, in an LGBT-friendly venue in the centre of Exeter - please email us or join our forum for details.
I'm very pleased with how it's going, we currently have a dozen people "on the books", half-and-half FAAB/MAAB, age spread from 20-50 (though the majority are under 30), and a whole array of different gender identities and sexual orientations.
We'll have a stall at Totnes Pride on Saturday 14th September, if anyone here finds themselves there then.
http://www.nbsw.org.uk (http://www.nbsw.org.uk)
:) I've also seen it as AFAB/AMAB. It's a much better label than "biological" etc., and leaves room for IAAB/AIAB folk too, of course (since these days, some lucky intersex folk are actually acknowledged as intersex from birth, and allowed to just get on with being so).
I've enjoyed the opportunity a couple of times now to say to people "Honey, I was never a man, I just used to look more like one."
I'm also delighted to report that the psychiatrist in Bristol whom we in the South West all get sent to for our 2nd opinion (if we want gender surgery) is very accepting of non-binary gender identities, and of non-stereotypical presentations. He's a star. I hope for more people like him in the system in the future, it will make a lot of people's lives less painful.
I can't believe that you get sent to Bristol for your therapist, i'm from Bristol & get sent to bloody London!
Me & FTM Diaries have discussed setting up an all inclusive trans support group here, the group that have ran the hostel I was in have even offered us a venue, it's early days yet as i'm a bit of a mess & all over the place so I'm struggling to get my head around anything right now.
Also my depression makes my attention span very short right now, once i'm in a better place mentally then it will be full steam ahead for a Bristol group.
For a while i've wanted to see a UK wide officially recognised trans group, maybe if some of these groups are a success then we could all join forces in the future.
Whatever happens Padma I wish you all the best
Likewise, m'dear - and I wish both of us a better attention span.
Hey, I'd like to join, I am not sure if I am non-binary or mtf, I think I am a mtf but I am still interested, is that ok? I think it would be cool to meet non-binary people and learn more about it, see if it is me
if only i lived in the uk... i hope you have fun with the group.
Thanks - and you're very welcome to join the forum if you want to, we're centred around the South West UK, but our scope is cosmic :D.