I kind of came out to my mother earlier. She kept suggesting clothing items that I didn't want because they're women's clothing and I said I didn't want them because they're for women.... Oops. Well, anyway, from there it got pretty bad. I tried actually explaining that I'm trans and don't feel like a girl. "well, what does being a girl feel like?" I tried explaining further, but she just kept telling me how I can do whatever I want as a girl and I don't need to let that hold me back. Well, I know that... but I'm not a girl. I just don't think she understands. She kept talking about how she drove truck and all that crap...
I've tried making myself comfortable in a female body... I like harry legs? I haven't shaved in several years. I don't like to wear dresses? tossed all of the ones I had a long time ago. I don't like enhancing my breasts with a bra? Threw out all of my bras, too. Wait, maybe I don't like my breasts being there at all? Got some binders. Yeah, all of that helps ease it a little, but I really want a man's body. I want to be on HRT and get top surgery at the very least. I don't know how to explain that.
Most people who aren't transgender have a difficult time understanding these things. It seems to them the source of their masculinity or femininity is their genitals. As though their are no other traits or characteristics that define someones gender identity. I haven't told my mom yet, so I am not the best source here. But, I would explain that you are in fact a man and would like to live and present as one for now on. Then explain what being transgender/transsexual means and why you believe that you are. Just be honest and tell her your feelings. That's my plan once I gain some more courage, just the opposite gender.
Quote from: Nyri on May 01, 2013, 07:59:46 PM
I kind of came out to my mother earlier. She kept suggesting clothing items that I didn't want because they're women's clothing and I said I didn't want them because they're for women.... Oops. Well, anyway, from there it got pretty bad. I tried actually explaining that I'm trans and don't feel like a girl. "well, what does being a girl feel like?" I tried explaining further, but she just kept telling me how I can do whatever I want as a girl and I don't need to let that hold me back. Well, I know that... but I'm not a girl. I just don't think she understands. She kept talking about how she drove truck and all that crap...
I've tried making myself comfortable in a female body... I like harry legs? I haven't shaved in several years. I don't like to wear dresses? tossed all of the ones I had a long time ago. I don't like enhancing my breasts with a bra? Threw out all of my bras, too. Wait, maybe I don't like my breasts being there at all? Got some binders. Yeah, all of that helps ease it a little, but I really want a man's body. I want to be on HRT and get top surgery at the very least. I don't know how to explain that.
Have you seen the coming out letters in our Wiki? They're in the lower left corner of the main page: https://www.susans.org/wiki/Main_Page (https://www.susans.org/wiki/Main_Page)
Hugs, Devlyn
Thanks, I knew they were there, but really wasn't planning on coming out for a while... like at least until I had my T note... but I'll check them out now that the cat's half way out of the bag, and that's not a great place for it to be. haha
I gave it another go today. I guess she didn't really understand that I was trying to say I was trans yesterday. She had asked if I wanted a sex change, but I didn't say yes, because when it's phrased like that it doesn't sound right, and what I want doesn't have that name in my mind.
Today was much better. She didn't understand... she thinks my hormones are messed up, and doesn't plan on changing pronouns or anything until I've had my "sex change" but at least she isn't angry at me, doesn't hate me, didn't disown me, didn't spout off fifty bible verses, or anything like that. I'm pretty sure the bible part was just because before I said it, I told her I didn't want to hear any of them... haha
Nyri, I'm terrified that my parents would do that too. The bible thing.
Just last week, my parents almost literally dragged me out of the house to go shopping for some dresses that they wanted me to wear for some sort of country pride thing. I kept hinting at the fact that I didn't want a dress, the entire time, I kept trying to convince them that I needed a suit instead of a dress.
I think that parents have a hard time with understanding the fact that their child isn't the gender they raised them to be. That's why I'm scared of coming out to them, especially because I still rely on them for medical care and things like that. :-/