Ok I have read a lot that people who are male to female don't like their junk for a better word. I don't hate it but know that I need to have srs. Anyone else in the same boat. At one point in my transition I was not keen on it but I don't think its right to hate something your born with than to turn around and turn it into something you want when its made out of the thing you hate.
I have used it a lot in my past. And I do masterbate though I heard its good to do that for srs reasons though I kind of forget why maybe to keep the skin supple :-\. ANywho knowing I need to have srs is fine with me but I don't hate what I have thats for sure. Anyone else like me on here or am I the only one, Stands in the corner confused LOL
I never really did mind my junk. I actually kinda miss it
I never hated mine either... And it wasn't a do or die urgency for me to get rid of them... But I feel much happier, complete, and correct now. One less thing for me to stress about. Also, it clears up a bunch of legal, work-related, and id doc issues. Not that this influenced me a lot, but life is much simpler all around now postop.
Quote from: JennX on May 26, 2013, 02:42:43 PM
I never hated mine either... And it wasn't a do or die urgency for me to get rid of them... But I feel much happier, complete, and correct now. One less thing for me to stress about. Also, it clears up a bunch of legal, work-related, and id doc issues. Not that this influenced me a lot, but life is much simpler all around now postop.
I couldn't have said it better. I would never want to get sent to the male side of the prison or jail looking the way I do now. Plus it's nice to know since I can't be a man at least I can marry one now
I totally agree with you. I don't hate whats between my legs. It came out with me when I was born and so its kinda like when you get something you want (life) and you get a freebie that comes with it (male sex organs) its not that you hate getting free stuff its more that you wish you could have chosen between one free thing and another (female sex organs).
Actually theres another analogy would be like your junk is a car that you got for Christmas or for a birthday. You have a good looking vehicle that someone picked out for you... the engine purs like a kitten ( ;) ) it has nice fuel efficiency. So its an all around functional vehicle but whenever you the owner of the car gets inside it. It doesn't FEEL right. Sure it drives smoothly but it lacks the personal appeal that just fits into your identity. So that gives you three options really... you could hated and either refuse to drive it or get rid of it... or you get used to it and eventually connect with it or you could take it to an autoshop and make some changes that you feel are going to turn it from a good car to a GREAT car!
Anyway you decide to go with is totally your choice since you OWN the car and you don't have to hate it in order to change it, YOU just need to believe that you are changing it for your own reasons and benefit!
For me, I USED to hate it because i thought I was stuck with it and couldn't do anything about it (almost go to the point of destroying it myself) but then I decided to appreciate it more in theory and hopefully will take it the autoshop when I am good and ready and have a "brand new" vehicle that I can be happy with later on.
So yeah you are not alone and not hating what you got. I don't hate mine anymore because I have the power to change it.
Good luck with making the most of what you got or changing it to suit your needs!
Love, Maribeth <3
Hate is probably too strong a term. I always found it more of a nuisance more than anything else (and still do). My dysphoria is not triggered by my genitals directly, but is much more dependent on the holistic impression of being read as a gender that I am not. If our cultural habit was to use some sort of display technique (penis sheaths or similar), I am sure my feelings would be very different, but at this stage I can simply use clothes and posture to eliminate that piece of falsely identifying information. This is true at least for day-to-day interactions – bedroom stuff is triggering, but for more reasons than simply the odd dangly bits. :P
Maribeth, I can't give +1 reps yet it seems, but that was a beautiful way to describe it.
I don't know about anyone else but my 'junk' seems to bother other people more than me despite the fact that they've never seen it (and some are only guessing that it exists). What's more, they've all got sod all chance of getting to see it as well.
Lana, I'm in kind of the same boat.
I don't hate my junk. I actually kind of like what I can do with it and I like the fact it produced two great children.
But it's the wrong shape. I really, really, really want it to be the right shape.
But is that enough "really"s to get SRS? I don't know. I'm daunted by the possibility of complications, years of discomfort, a punishing dilation schedule, etc.
Fortunately I'm not even fulltime yet, so I don't have to decide for a while.
Thanks everyone for responding and being so honest its nice to know I'm not alone in feeling this way. Question for Tristan you have spoke about jail twice from what I have read on here. I would hope one would not do anything to be sent to jail but I understand what your saying about being put with women.
Suzifrommd you can have complications even with breast implants and Iv already got those done back in 2011. I still have some numbness from getting that done but I would do it again in a heart beat.
(years of discomfort, a punishing dilation schedule, etc.)
From what I have read and heard you don't have years of discomfort but I guess everyone is different. As for the dilation it does not become such a pain in the ass over time. I have a friend who is post-op and shes fine than again she had it in her 20's shes now 33.
Iv done all my homework and I know what is involved. To know that it does get better and with time its not so scary. And if so many people are getting it done and are happy then something is positive about all that.
Quote from: Tristan on May 26, 2013, 02:46:36 PM
I couldn't have said it better. I would never want to get sent to the male side of the prison or jail looking the way I do now. Plus it's nice to know since I can't be a man at least I can marry one now
I can relate to what you've said Tristan. I passed on my SRS date and opted out. Later I went to jail for domestic violence when I smacked one of my sons for swearing at his mom, thanks to these damned nanny state laws. They put me in an orange jump suit that I couldn't zip higher than my navel because it was so small. I was wearing a cotton A shirt aka wife beater shirt with no bra, you know how revealing they are, so my boobs were hanging out. They put me in with the general male population and I think I saw a few eyeballs popping out, the dorks thinking that their ship had just come in. I turned right around and leaned on the emergency buzzer for five minutes straight and they moved me to a private cell until the bail bondsman showed up. I had a rather intense sense of panic, not that I can't hold my own, but there was about 25 in that general population tank.
I'm in the minority here, but I severely dislike my genitalia. However, there are other reasons for this than just being trans. Many transwomen don't go through a huge amount of dysphoria regarding their privates, so it's really not uncommon for you to feel this way.
I'm indifferent to it. It's there, and that's it. I have NO desire to ever insert Tab A into Slot B ever again, the last few months I tried (well over a year ago) it creeped me out in a major way. I imagine similar to if you cut open someone, and stuck your hand inside their guts...feeling around inside another living human, you could feel everything inside...OMG it grossed me out. :(
On the other hand (no pun intended), I've had several sexual experiences since then where I absolutely had a CRAVING, a NEED, to have a vagina, even to the point of having a "ghost" vjj...I won't feel normal until I get one. (If I don't, I'll just have to accept being uncomfortable (uneasy) during sex)
I dislike it a lot more now that I am on HRT. Before I went thru phases and waves of acceptance and disgust. All in all, if this was a gift I would return it. But my whole life I have plotted to get rid of it and make myself complete and I do consider it a curse. At one point I accpeted it but that was because I became very religious and made myself believe God must be punishing me. The only thing I believe now is that I punished myself for having gone the last five years with it when I could have done something about it. It's always been a question of money and how to get rid of it not if I should. I have had GID and genital dysphoria for as long as I can remember....and maybe longer.
Yeah jail and being a pretty pre op don't mix. I always said I would never belong to anyone else again. With srs problem solved. I just wish it was easy for everyone else to get srs like it was for me. Rather they need surgery because of extreme dysphoria or they just want it gone. I think it's not nice that some health care professionals give you girls and guys such a hard time
Quote from: Lanalicious34 on May 26, 2013, 02:19:59 PM
Ok I have read a lot that people who are male to female don't like their junk for a better word. I don't hate it but know that I need to have srs. Anyone else in the same boat. At one point in my transition I was not keen on it but I don't think its right to hate something your born with than to turn around and turn it into something you want when its made out of the thing you hate.
I'm somewhat fine with what I have. I'll end up getting SRS for convenience and the ability to have proper fun with guys, in all likelihood, but if I find a really awesome girl who doesn't mind being with a girl like me... then I might end up keeping it until she loses interest in me. :)
It's really just the rest of me that I dislike so much. My body hair in particular is a pain in the everywhere.
Yeah srs does make it more waxy to wear my bikini at the beach.
Quote from: Tristan on May 28, 2013, 09:52:19 AM
Yeah srs does make it more waxy to wear my bikini at the beach.
Brazilian anyone? :icon_yikes:
No, I don't hate it per se. I hate the extreme inconvenience it causes. I hate that clothes don't fit right. I hate that I can't have a relationship whilst I have it, because it feels wrong. And I don't want a partner to know I have it, only I had it. Now that I've come to the end of my tether, I may start actually hating it.
Hate it, hate it, hate it. Always have, always will. SRS is only a choice for me, in that of life or death. It doesn't belong on this body. Worthless piece of crap, a useless skin tag, honestly. Makes me almost cry every time I realize what should be there, isn't there. At least it won't be there one day, you know?
I've tried to slice off the bugger years ago, and I think I'd attempt doing so again if not for: A) I'd likely die from blood loss. B) I need it for the best possible SRS results.