I am on the cusp of addressing my gender issues with my therapist. As I've mentioned in previous posts. It's becoming harder and harder to live as male. To be honest my health is suffering as it is and if I carry on going as I have been, the stress and unhappiness is going to kill me. I'd like to transition, but have absolutely no idea how to start the process. It seems the more I try to fight my gender issues, the harder it feels to carry on.
Well your gender issues aren't going away. That's for sure. You've been this way for like ever, right? You're still at a good age to transition at 32 but really the clock is ticking pretty loudly. If you want optimal results you pretty much have to do it now. Age 20 obviously woulda been better, but it's not too late, but it will be at some point, or at least a whole lot harder. Plus you and your wife can start over. If that's what she wants.
I'd go to a gender clinic ASAP. It doesn't sound like you are seeing a gender therapist but a regular one. That;s fine. Nothing wrong with that. But to get on HRT a gender clinic would be fastest. What area do you live in?
good luck
I think the next step would be trying to find a doctor who will help you with the transitioning process. If your therapist can help you with that, great! If not, try to find other people who have experienced gender dysphoria in your locality for advice. Generally the next step from here is a doctor and endocrinologist who will be able to determine your body to make sure it is healthy and functioning!
Genetics. .
I restarted ar 39 and half a year later
Looking on the mirror after a shower.
I see a girl looking back...sometimes...
Definitely need ffs though...
But becasie ffs can take care of face...
I am more worried about butt and hip
Development. .
Hi Girls.
I live on the outskirts of Sydney, Australia. I am originally from Wales though. I think my transition would occur here as it's so much more tolerant compared to where I grew up.
I haven't got a clue how I would go about making my transition. Is there some kind of plan girls have used which covers the medical, social and clothing aspects? I am feeling very much scared and alone with all this at the moment.
Hi Delyth Ann
I missed your introduction. My apologies.
I'm Cindy (obviously! Hee Hee) and I live in Adelaide, so welcome to the site and to Australia.
Australia is in many ways one of the most accepting places in the world for trans*people and there are good resources.
If you just Google transgender services in Sydney you will get everything you need to move forward.
To get a good gender therapist go to the www.ANZPATH.org (http://www.anzpath.org) site, you will find a list of providers in Sydney and their contact numbers.
The gender therapy method in NSW is very much on informed consent so is quite easy and painless to deal with.
There are also a host of TG support sites in NSW, in fact it has some of the best in the world.
So how? Well, book a session with the therapy people and ask!! The gender therapist will probably give you links to NSW gender organisations if you haven't googled them yet.
Hugs
Cindy
Hi Delyth Ann
Trust Cindy's advise on this one, even though she is slightly evil in a nice way. :D
I am in Sydney as well so all the best, you're not alone here.
Hugs J
Quote from: Jenny07 on June 30, 2013, 04:16:47 AM
Hi Delyth Ann
Trust Cindy's advise on this one, even though she is slightly evil in a nice way. :D
I am in Sydney as well so all the best, you'ar not alone here.
Hugs J
Me evil!!! Geex I'll brand that on your bum young lady! Just as soon as they give me leave from the nunnery!
Heee Hee
Thank you so much girls for your kind words. It took a lot of courage to register for this site, but I am glad I did. As you can imagine I have a million questions and emotions going on, but I am starting to think I can really do this. The future does scare the hell out of me though. How did you all go about the process? I guess I feel as though I need to put some plan in place for making the change. I guess the first place to start would be to speak to.someone.
Oh Honey,
You have made the big step!!! You have met us!
This may or not mean something.
There is nothing that you fear, hate or be tormented about that we have not been through.
You are now family, we understand.
No one; Absolutely no one, understands a trans*woman's journey like another trans*woman.
You now have family, you are thrice blessed, you have Aussie family.
Relax, and enjoy. Oh and have a cry of relief, because your problems are starting to be over :laugh:
Cindy
Welcome
Yes it does take more than a deep breath to register and admit to yourself who you really are inside.
Congratulations and well done as it does take a ton of courage.
It tormented me for many years and yes I am scared of the future but also excited about the journey ahead to be the true me.
I have started with hair removal on my face mainly laser as this takes time, no therapy required there and to get some medication to stop MPB which was making me sick thinking about.
Starting it has really helped me and get me on my way.
I had planned to see a therapist a while ago but due to work have not had a chance.
This will start soon when I take holidays.
Welcome to the Aussie mafia which dear aunty Cindy heads up with her above mentioned branding irons.
There is plenty of info here to read up on and feel free to PM us.
Hugs
One of Cindy's minions
The fear factor for me is the effect transition will have on those closest to me. None of the issues are their fault. I also have questions about appearance and fashion. How will I develop a style? It's all a bit overwhelming. I am struggling.
You develope style naturally...
I used to read magazines A LOT
Girls fashion mags..
And learn your sizes...work with that...
Hi Delyth Ann,
I advise you to let your own preferences guide your transition in terms of style so that you remain/become as authentically you as possible. I felt sure that i did not want to go from one "act" to another. There is no end to the original fault game but really none of us had any choice in our birth and that's were this started. We didn't pick our parents, a skirt or pants. As adults we do get to choose how we are going to behave with what we have and who we are becoming...... I have seen very detailed plans go away as the there seems many unknowable parts to this journey. We are fond of saying that your mileage may vary as no one can tell you for sure how you will feel. Many of us take small and tentative step while for some it's the big bang approach. You certainly sound like a person that needs to address your feelings in person with a good, non judgmental listener--a therapist, friend or?
Good luck,
Tessa James
I think there is going to be a bit of trial and error with things including fashion. But then I suppose that is the only way to learn.
I am going to start growing my hair as a starting point. I have quiet thick hair which has started to curl a bit when I haven't had a hair cut for a few weeks. I am not sure my hair would go more wavy if it got longer. Will hormones have much effect on my hair.
I've got pretty bad nails at the moment as I have nasty habit of biting them. I need to find a way to stop myself from doing this.
There is so much to think about and consider. It's hard not to feel overwhelmed by everything. I might feel female inside, but it seems like I will need to go through an adolescence in my thirties to learn everything I never learnt growing up.
There is nothing wrong with waves..
And nails. Mm.m I did my nails twice...
I go to salon's....some are fast and cheap
Many of us describe feeling like a teenage girl when in transition. a changing body with developing breasts, longer hair, uncertainty, and a million styles to choose from. I think this is incredibly fun and a fantastic personal growth experience. Very few people will understand the depth of our identity and what it takes to make this change. My hormone level is now in the normal range for a woman while I adapt to emotional and physical changes that I could only imagine a few months ago. HRT has had a softening impact on my body hair that seems to grow back slower with no apparent change in my beard (laser for that) or full head of hair. I enjoy each day and celebrate the subtle curves life now has for me.
Quote from: Tessa James on July 01, 2013, 05:31:00 PM
Many of us describe feeling like a teenage girl when in transition. a changing body with developing breasts, longer hair, uncertainty, and a million styles to choose from. I think this is incredibly fun and a fantastic personal growth experience. Very few people will understand the depth of our identity and what it takes to make this change. My hormone level is now in the normal range for a woman while I adapt to emotional and physical changes that I could only imagine a few months ago. HRT has had a softening impact on my body hair that seems to grow back slower with no apparent change in my beard (laser for that) or full head of hair. I enjoy each day and celebrate the subtle curves life now has for me.
Hehe very very good point :-)
My mojther watched the effects of the first five months.
And I'm sure she thought I was a teenage girl...my music
Pissed her off...the things that I need or want pissed her off
LOL
I have heard that there is a psychological regression...
Your mind follows your body. Needs to go back to 12
For a while when a puberty is initiated. .
Hence why I say....hang on tight !!!
My taste of music changed...my thoughts about men
Everything changes...
Step one...get a informed consent doctor to write out
Girlie pills
I was just thinking. The past few days have been the first time I have ever been referred to as a girl, whether as "Honey", "Miss" or any other female pronoun, in my life. Well feel so nice. It's so touching and makes me feel a bit better about myself. Thank girls so so much.
I had my photo taken at a a lunch today with work colleagues. Seeing the photos made me realise I am going to need to loose weight off my face and chin as part of the process.
I wear glasses and also realised I am going need to look for a more feminine style and or wear contact lenses. Passing is important to me.
I was thinking about shoes and looking at what some of the girls in my office wear. Ballet flats might be a good starting point.
You may hear a lot about "sensible shoes." I tried high heels and that is another learning experience to try at home first! I am very public about being transgender and out and some folks feel free to be my "fashionistas" I try to keep it lighthearted but am serious about creating my own authentic girl style and reclaiming some of that lost girlhood.
You go Girl!
Quote from: delyth ann on July 02, 2013, 07:16:52 AM
I was thinking about shoes and looking at what some of the girls in my office wear. Ballet flats might be a good starting point.
I would try heels, but practice at home first, search youtube for tutorials on how to walk in heels.. here is an example
How to Walk in Heels & Stilettos =P (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vHTNldZ9z4c#)
It is an acquired comfort, and you feet will hurt at first.. but you do get use to wearing heels.. I can wear heels all day now.
Ooo heels
My very first pair was three inch spikes..
Did I ever get broken in hard hahha that summer
But in the end I was comfortable in them...
And can wear them all day long
I'd like to be able to wear some nice heels with a nice evening gown one day. I've felt almost jealous in the past when I've been to various functions. I feel as though I've lost out growing up in a male body. Silly things like being able to go to school prom and uni graduation ball.
I am starting to look at various websites to get an idea of the clothes I would like to wear. Looking to going out and buying clothes.
I have some questions about buying clothes and getting the sizing right, knowing that once I start taking hormones, my body shape and size is going to change. What would be a the best clothes to get at the start of transition? I am around 5ft 9' and weigh around 78 kilos. Medium build.
Another possibly silly question, but is it easier to start transition at a particular season of the year? In summer here it can get into the mid 40c's.
For clothes and things I met a number of cross-dressers where I used to live and tbh Jess was one of the most dazzling high maintenance girls I have ever met (Sorry Cindy! You're gorgeous and high maintenance too!). The girls I met then had great tips too and I really loved their help as in the beginning I was a bit of a wreck and had nfi.
I still dont but at least I feel comfortable in my boring jeans and tops. :)
I love having my nails done but work will kinda stop me from having them anything but polished, my hair is a work in progress (still too short imo) but nothing makes me feel "nicer" than wearing a beautiful dress :) :)
Shame I have such bad taste :P
This tutorial will show you how to creates cleavage with a totally flat chest..
Nice for you as a pre-op
HOW TO Create Large Cleavage (DragQueens) (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JFdBCfjVS5A#)