Hey all, so this has been something that has been weighing more and more on my mind as of late. How to come out to my children that I identify as a woman?
I have four children, my daughter is the oldest at 12, and then I have three sons aged 10, 7, and 3. They are all still very young and impressionable. I'm curious to know from others that have come out to younger children on how they did it and how the kids handled it.
I have some artistic ability and I'm thinking I might create an illustrated children's book with a simplified version of my story. It'll be a lot of work, but I'm thinking something like that might help get the message across to the younger ones better. Thoughts?
I can't help you on how to come out to your kids but writing and illustrated book sounds like a wonderful idea.
Wow... I love this idea, and with an 8, 4, and 2 it would be perfect. I have many talents, but art is not one, I'm afraid. Did you do this? You should publish it.
Yes. It is an intriguing question. The problem is not your own kids, but how their mates will react to your children.
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My daughter at age 9 is learning a kind of martial art (karate). She really likes it, and will get a black belt within a few months. A minivan from the karate hall gives ride to my daughter everyday.
Yesterday evening, I was just in front of my house, and the minivan came. The driver used to say hello to me, but at this time he did not. He just murmured. I realized that I am wearing a kind of skirt. Her mates in the minivan studied me, but the time was short and the minivan just left.
At home, my wife and kids do not care so much about what I wear. They accept it well, although my little daughter sometimes questioned it. I think my wife has answered those questions very well.
While drinking some wine on the dinner table, I casually asked my daughter like "what are you going to say if your friends talk about my wearing skirt tomorrow?"
She answered loudly like:
There are some men who look like women!
It is a unique taste of my dad, and you do not need to meddle with it!
Probably my dad is possessed by a ghost of woman!
and etc.
I guess these answers are what my wife has told to my daughter.
My daughter also sometimes said to me that some of her friends first thought me as her mom. As she is very active and optimistic, I expect she will deal with this very well. She is so much friendly and curious. Everybody in my apartment knows my daughter, because she says hello to anybody here. But, I still worry about reactions of her friends.
My two sons are in middle and high school, and understand my ->-bleeped-<- the same as other adults do. My eldest son some times jokes to my family like "We should be open-minded to accept even such an eccentric person like Dad".
barbie~~
Your kids are totally amazing! If mine do as well, I'll be ecstatic. My son 8 is the one we worry about... smart, doesn't have lots of friends outside of activities, etc. I have no idea which way he'll go, but I will train him once I'm out to the family (his aunts, uncles).
I have three kids - a 6 year old daughter and two sons, 4 years and 18 months old. They're all happy with me when I dress as a woman around the house, and the youngest often calls me "mum" when I'm dressed ;)
I'm not sure what their reactions will be like when I start transitioning fully, but at this point they all see it as something that I do, and it's nothing particularly remarkable to them - to the point that they rarely mention it anymore.
I have a daughter that is 11 and a grandson that is 3. My daughter did have a lot of tough questions when I first sat her down and had the talk with her but now she is absolutely one my best supporters. She has seen just how much happier I have become. In fact she has usually been with me when I've came out to others and she even has her own way of explaining things that usually makes people a little more understanding or accepting. As far as the 3 yo grandson its just like nothing has ever changed. The first time he seen me dressed as my self he looked at me funny until I ask him if he wanted to for a ride on the 4 wheeler and all he said was " Lets go PawPaw ". He still calls me PawPaw and that's fine with me, he can call me what ever he wants. The most important thing is you make sure they know you will always love them and will always be there for them no matter what you look like on the outside.
I have this problem when I'm at my dads because they have a 6 year old. They say that I can't dress and put makeup in when I'm around him because he is too young to understand. It's really hard to be confined to a bathroom when I put makeup on. It's frustrating.