So I've basically realized I'm transgender, although I've always identified as androgynous I have now come to terms not only do I want to look like a guy I feel like one too. ??? But with that all said now I need to take the next step and transition. My family knows about it and keeps asking me if I'm going to get HRT,surgeries,etc. Although I'm grateful for their support it makes me feel weird cuz I don't feel comfortable talking about it.I see a therapist and thankfully live in a very liberal city where there is plentiful of LGBT resources that I have utilized. How did you know you were transgender? I feel like I am because I experience constant gender dysphoria and @ first I think I could suppress it by looking like a guy(short hair,baggy clothes etc) but then I realized I wanted people to see me as a guy and not just look like one. Also is it hard to socially transition? I think this is my biggest fear because although I look and feel like a guy I still act like a girl sometimes and i think that throws people off. I know I have a lot of questions but I just need someone to talk to about this.....
~Kye[/size][/font]
Changed font and colour - Cindy
Welcome Kye.
Pleeeeease don't write in bright red and bold, it is hard to read :)
Is it hard socially? No point in denying it, yes, it can be very difficult, and you definitely want to go about it in a well planned and well thought out fashion.
There's no such thing as an ideal city that will make it magically easy for you. But it is good to hear you have resources nearby.
Welcome Kyle.
As Lesley said there isn't really a go to place to be LGBT. However, if you live in the UK, I can say there are at least three hot spots for the LGBT scene which is Manchester (Canal street), Brighton and Bristol. These cities have a large LGBT population and thus probably find it easier to transition, at least theoretically.
If you live in the USA I can only think of San Francisco? And perhaps numerous other parts of California. Admittedly my knowledge of the LGBT culture is limited as it is, let alone in a country outside of my own.
Finally I get to find a thread started by a post I'm sure I could read from the opposite side of my apartment to my computer. Thank you for reassuring me that there's nothing wrong with my eyesight.
Is it hard to socially transition? Yes it is, but you know, the difficulty in transitioning is pretty much of the same nature as say being unemployed, having to cope with a major illness, being obese and having to lose weight, or setting up a new business.
It's something where you find not everybody will understand or accept you, where you will come up against problems where you have to find solutions, and place certain restrictions which you will have to find a way of getting round or compensating for. (I know my sentence structure is heavy, and feel for anyone reading this post out loud, you must be sounding like an asthmatic by now).
In short it is what you make of it.
I personally find that the biggest single determining factor in transitioning isn't other people, it isn't your circumstances, but is how you deal with it and what attitudes you develop towards it.
Yes it can be difficult, but just because something is difficult doesn't mean that you can't gain something from it, you can't be happy or find it beneficial to you.
Be careful about profiling and stereotyping people and making the same mistakes as those who are prejudiced or who have issues with you being trans. Just because someone objects to you being you based on what is in the Bible doesn't mean that Christians have issues with someone being trans. Just because someone who is gay is hostile towards you doesn't mean that gays are against you. It just means that that one person, an individual, has an issue with you, and it's their issue, not your's.
Transitioning can bring you into conflict with people, especially those with strong views or opinions. But here you have the choice whether to engage in that conflict or not. I would personally advise picking your battles and conflicts to avoid becoming emotionally drained and having your faith in human nature regularly bashed and battered.
Yes looking at the bigger picture can make transitioning look scary and daunting, but the reality is that a lot of us here are coping just fine and it's a great experience for developing character.
Be well and be positive.
Quote from: Dreams2014 on July 21, 2013, 02:34:05 AM
Welcome Kyle.
As Lesley said there isn't really a go to place to be LGBT. However, if you live in the UK, I can say there are at least three hot spots for the LGBT scene which is Manchester (Canal street), Brighton and Bristol. These cities have a large LGBT population and thus probably find it easier to transition, at least theoretically.
If you live in the USA I can only think of San Francisco? And perhaps numerous other parts of California. Admittedly my knowledge of the LGBT culture is limited as it is, let alone in a country outside of my own.
You missed out Blackpool
Quote from: big kim on July 21, 2013, 06:08:06 AM
You missed out Blackpool
Ah thank you, I wasn't sure if it was a community or more a tourist hot spot to be honest.
The better you can blend the easier it is. But talking with a therapist is good. Plus having hobbies
Welcome. i can pretty much echo what everyone else has said. Transition can be hard but if it's the right thing for you then it can be good as well. One thing i will say is walk with confidence. most people will know better than to say anything. I have discovered that people may stare for a second but generally soon realize that they are being rude and stop. There is always the odd horrible person but for the most part you can just ignor them they are not worth the breath of arguing with them anyway. I wont pretend there wont be bad days but i generally find that the good ones far outweigh them. :angel:
QuoteI wont pretend there wont be bad days but i generally find that the good ones far outweigh them.
QFT
Confidence is very important. If you are not already confident you are doing the right thing I don't know how to get it, but don't give up. I find approaching people with confidence and a smile is very effective.