Susan's Place Transgender Resources

News and Events => Opinions & Editorials => Topic started by: DriftingCrow on July 25, 2013, 09:20:46 PM

Title: Preferred Gender Pronouns: Obnoxious? (No)
Post by: DriftingCrow on July 25, 2013, 09:20:46 PM
http://www.bust.com/preferred-gender-pronouns-obnoxious-no.html (http://www.bust.com/preferred-gender-pronouns-obnoxious-no.html)
Author: Hallie Marks Source: Bust via Femminizzle

"So what's the big deal? Well, gender is so embedded in our language that it can be very complicated for a genderqueer person (and especially their friends, family, and acquaintances) to know how to navigate that. Think about how many times you use "he" "she" "him" "her" "his" or "hers" in an hour. Try to have a conversation without using gendered pronouns. It's tricky! But does that mean you should disrespect someone's choice, if they choose not to identify as either a "he" or a "she"? No. Unfortunately, there are some people (with large readerships) who think they shouldn't have to try to make genderqueer people feel comfortable. xoJane writer s.e. smith created the prounoun "ou" to replace he, she, or any other gendered term when referring to ou's self."

In an article discussing one of s. e. smith's articles, Harrison Nolan of Gawker referred to ou as "she". "Two xoJane employees emailed Nolan saying that s.e. smith did not go by "she" and instead preferred "ou," asking him to change it. Nolan posted these messages on the article, responding with a sarcastic "Okay." He then went through the article and crossed out "she", replacing it with ou. Yeah, he "changed" it, but made sure to leave the "she" up there, in order to imply, "I'm doing this, but not because I want to...and its stupid."" People who prefer alternate pronouns are seen as being pretentious, off-putting, and counter-productive and face rude behavior from society when expressing their preferred pronouns.
Title: Re: Preferred Gender Pronouns: Obnoxious? (No)
Post by: stavraki on July 25, 2013, 09:34:39 PM
Quote from: LearnedHand on July 25, 2013, 09:20:46 PM
http://www.bust.com/preferred-gender-pronouns-obnoxious-no.html (http://www.bust.com/preferred-gender-pronouns-obnoxious-no.html)
Author: Hallie Marks Source: Bust via Femminizzle

"So what's the big deal? Well, gender is so embedded in our language that it can be very complicated for a genderqueer person (and especially their friends, family, and acquaintances) to know how to navigate that. Think about how many times you use "he" "she" "him" "her" "his" or "hers" in an hour. Try to have a conversation without using gendered pronouns. It's tricky! But does that mean you should disrespect someone's choice, if they choose not to identify as either a "he" or a "she"? No. Unfortunately, there are some people (with large readerships) who think they shouldn't have to try to make genderqueer people feel comfortable. xoJane writer s.e. smith created the prounoun "ou" to replace he, she, or any other gendered term when referring to ou's self."

In an article discussing one of s. e. smith's articles, Harrison Nolan of Gawker referred to ou as "she". "Two xoJane employees emailed Nolan saying that s.e. smith did not go by "she" and instead preferred "ou," asking him to change it. Nolan posted these messages on the article, responding with a sarcastic "Okay." He then went through the article and crossed out "she", replacing it with ou. Yeah, he "changed" it, but made sure to leave the "she" up there, in order to imply, "I'm doing this, but not because I want to...and its stupid."" People who prefer alternate pronouns are seen as being pretentious, off-putting, and counter-productive and face rude behavior from society when expressing their preferred pronouns.

wonderful article.  It's got a beautiful egalitarianism to the tone, in a sense I get of seeing things on a spectrum, and noting a place for embracing people of so many combinations and hues of gender.

I loved the 'gender expression' versus 'gender identity' items.  I'm definitely 'non-gendered' part of the time, on gender expression and also 'agender' in gender expression part of the time.  And at others, sit at the top end on gender expression and identity as either of, or both genders, concurrently.  Visualise a guy mixing male and female 'stereotypes' concurrently--mixing 'pink' and 'blue' - empathy and agency - concurrently, and at high levels.  A suit and tie, with a handbag.  A domineering position by being submissive.  A submissive position by being domineering.  Is that 'agender' 'nongendered' or elevated on both concurrently, on the scales of measure the article looks at?
Title: Re: Preferred Gender Pronouns: Obnoxious? (No)
Post by: Nero on July 26, 2013, 08:05:29 AM
While there was no need for rudeness on the part of the writer referenced, I hate to say it but I also find made up pronouns and creative spellings, symbols for names a little precious. For the record, I felt the same way about 'the artist formerly known as Prince' use of his name too. We already have gender neutral pronouns such as zie, hir, etc, having to have your own personal one does make a 'look at me! I'm special!' kind of statement. Not saying I wouldn't respect their choice.
Title: Re: Preferred Gender Pronouns: Obnoxious? (No)
Post by: DriftingCrow on July 26, 2013, 05:15:10 PM
Yes, I wish there was a little more uniformity in the gender-neutral pronouns, like when am I supposed to use zir, over hir, hen, etc.? The word hen as a pronoun makes me think of poultry, so I really don't like that one too much, though of course I'd still use it if someone told me that's what they prefer.
Title: Re: Preferred Gender Pronouns: Obnoxious? (No)
Post by: suzifrommd on July 26, 2013, 05:49:23 PM
How do words get added to the English language? Who decides when something is a word or just a flight of someone's fancy?

Because we need some "official agreed-upon" gender neutral pronouns.