There are a lot of things I can't change right now or ever, like my hormones, my height or my chest. I'm just starting to come out, and I'd like to find some things that I can change and that will make me feel or seem more male.
How can I develop more male speech patterns? I don't have any brothers and I go to an all-girls school, so I don't have much contact with guys my age.
How can a short curvy guy dress? Most stuff I've found about how to dress as a trans guy assumes you're small. I have massive hips.
Are there any other things I can do that aren't part of medical transition?
Well I have massive hips to (join the club) and I wear male pants that come up a bit higher (waist instead of hips) or are lower but baggy as well so it's not that obvious my hips are wide it's just the pants. For me wearing male clothes weather I'm presenting as male or not make me feel better about myself. Even withouth binder I feel better wearing male shirts. Also male underwear and maybe packing with a sock ( double layer your underwear and put the sock in between) and wearing male deodorant. And getting a proper male haircut helped a lot too, and you don't have to worry about your hairdresser or anyone alse looking weird at you going in with a male photo. I just said I liked that cut better and my gossip of a hairdresses didn't look twice.
For male speach you could use youtube videos ?
Sorry my reply ended up so long hope it can help some
you can
cut your hair
start working out
listen to speeches by men and practice emulating them(Obama is decisively male when he speaks, his voice drops at the end of every sentence)
suits can hide curves
Pants and shirts with patterns will distract from curves
get male frieds and hang out with them as much as possible. after awhile you will naturally pick up on manerisms.
Get into a strictly (or stereotypically) male hobby
Cutting your hair can be tricky. It really depends on your facial features/structure. Just having short hair doesn't automatically = male. Plenty of women have short hair, or even buzzed hair. If you obviously don't have any facial hair, cutting your hair short can make you either look really female or like a small boy. If it's not a matter of "passing" but just making you feel more comfortable in your own skin, then get whatever cut you feel comfortable with.
Stay away from super oversize clothing. If you're short and have wide areas of your body (like the hips) you'll end up looking much larger than you are if your clothes are too big. By all means get pants hemmed. You'll want pants to camouflage the hips. You can't really do much about your bone structure but having a shirt that hits you at the right spot (just at the hips) and then pants that aren't too baggy, but fit your hips and go straight down from there should help. You may have to get other clothes tailored to fit you right (for instance, a men's suit jacket or other type of jacket). I'm short as well so I have to be really picky about clothes. You can also find some key androgynous pieces in the women's department. Certain brands of shirts for instance have a more male cut (Ralph Lauren is one I've noticed that doesn't have boob darts and isn't too curvy). If you don't have a hundreds of $ to blow on a new wardrobe, you can try the thrift store but I've never had much luck there. It's all larger sizes every time I've tried to go. Although if you found something that fit in some areas you might have enough money left over to get it tailored.
Definitely go for the male underwear. That's a total confidence boost for some reason.
Working out is key. The more you're able to "shape" your body and build some muscle, the more potential to build confidence is there. There's a workout thread on here and every now and then someone will post a thread on what they're doing as a workout. Eat a healthy diet as well. Female bodies are capable of producing smaller amounts of testosterone and the right diet and exercise and help you burn fat and build more muscle. I've seen plenty of female athletes (who aren't on steroids) who have more masculine physiques because of their training. It's also something that while you're doing it, you can take your mind off everything else but concentrating on the exercises.
As for voice, I think NathanielM's suggestion about watching guys on Youtube is a good one.
Can you wear a binder, at least sometimes when not going to class? The first time putting on a binder is awesome when you get dressed and look in the mirror. If you can manage to get one, you could pass it off as a specialty sports bra if needed
regular fit/loose fit jeans to hide hips.
Quote from: spacerace on August 10, 2013, 05:18:18 PM
If you can manage to get one, you could pass it off as a specialty sports bra if needed
this is very true. when I was an assitant counselor at camp, I had one binder because I packed all my sports bras the night before I went, so it was my only option when I got dressed to go. it accidentally fell on the floor one day and I didn't notice and the other counselors walked all over the cabin asking whose (weird) sports bra it was. took me several moments to realise it was my binder too XD they actually were convinced it was one of the girls' and had no idea it wasn't just a sports bra.
Avoid boot cut pants. They can give you a more flare type shape if you have hips and it's not very masculine.
Short hair, but not buzz cuts, they can look very feminine!
Practice being more monotone in how you speak. Have less afflictions in your voice and trail off your voice. Kinda more care free. DON'T force your voice low. Without proper training you'll hurt your throat and it's insanely obvious anyway.
Full body binders help with big hips. Helps flatten out a bit because the majority if the issue there is fat distribution over bones. They're a pain in the ass to put on, but definitely worth it.
Quote from: chuck on August 10, 2013, 11:51:23 AM
listen to speeches by men and practice emulating them(Obama is decisively male when he speaks, his voice drops at the end of every sentence)
Haha good idea, but also make sure you don't go around sounding like you're making a presidential address in everyday conversation. =p
Quote from: chuck on August 10, 2013, 11:51:23 AM
listen to speeches by men and practice emulating them(Obama is decisively male when he speaks, his voice drops at the end of every sentence)
Watching movies can help too. Just don't watch Thor unless you want to start talking like an Asgardian.
Two things that I've got going for me are my broad shoulders and my dark body hair. If I can manage to slim my hips, I might get a decent male silhouette. Can working out do that, or is it more a T thing? The bones of my hips are fairly wide but there's also some fat that I can hopefully minimise.
Actually T does slim the hips down to some extent. It redistributes the fat about so that it lands more on your stomach (and I think I see more on the upper abdomen as well). Exercise may help as well. OTOH, nothing removes bone. OTOH, look around, quite a lot of guys have big hips. I am really struck by this as I am watching.
--Jay
Like Jay said, you can't change bone, bit the bigger giveaway is the fat distribution there.
From personal experience, even at my skinniest, I had big hips. Problem is that with fat distribution, anything you do shed there is still the go to for new fat. Working out may help a bit though and can never hurt. I just know from personal experience that nothing I did worked too well, so I always disguised them with longer tees and overshirts. I never dared tuck a shirt in. But now I'm finding that the fat is dropping and staying off!! T makes a huge difference, but you still have to burn the fat off, it can't just migrate.
Longer tees, polos and overshirts help hide bigger hips. Try to avoid anything too fitted. There's also a very thin line between too baggy and too tight with big hips. It's crazy. The best way to deal with it, I found, is try on pants in store with a longer top and keep changing sizes until you find what works. It makes shopping a pain in the ass but it's worth it in my opinion.