So it has been almost eight months since I have started hormones and I am still feeling rather dysphoric and bad about my body. It isn't due to impatience but rather knowing that I was born male and didn't do anything about my gender dysphoria until I was 21. I wish to death that I did it when I was younger so that I didn't have to go through puberty and let testosterone take its course. I'm always nitpicking my masculine features such as my muscles, broad shoulders, small hips, etc. It's just hard to focus on the good when all I am seeing is a genetic male looking back at me. There are honestly days where I wish to drink or start self harming again but I know that either will lead down a bad path and that they're terrible ways of coping. I'm only going through transition because i don't want to even think about the alternative, to me being a trans woman, though no where near ideal, is many, many times better than living as a man.
Julia, we have to first be nice and accepting of ourselves. You can change nothing about the past, but you can have whatever future you want to make. There are things you can work on and things you can't. But attitude is always malleable.
You are still early in the process. Patience! :-*
Have you started presenting female at all? I think you should. I mean your parents are supportive so why not do it. There's nothing stopping you. This will lessen much of your dysphoria.
Well I have been presenting female about 80% of the time and it's been a very mixed bag for me, on one hand I feel great presenting how I wish and on the other I feel like a man dressed in womans clothes. I'm finding it just very hard accepting myself being trans, I've been mentally treating it as a curse rather than a blessing that it is. I just live with a lot of regrets about my past that I'm trying to get over.
it only has been 8 months sis..dont give up.. im 23 and i just started my hrt..