*Trigger Warning*
'That's a Man!' (http://www.huffingtonpost.com/dr-joe-wenke/thats-a-man_b_3856303.html)
Dr. Joe Wenke, The Huffington Post, 09/04/2013 6:22 pm
It is dangerous for a gay or transgender person to walk down the street in any city or town in the United States of America. The anti-gay law in Russia is despicable. The harassment of transgender women in Greece is an affront to human rights. The fact that it is illegal to engage in homosexual sex in any number of countries and punishable by death in a number of Muslim nations is an abomination. But we must face the fact that in the year 2013 in the United States of America, despite or maybe in part because of the progress that we have seen in marriage equality and LGBTQ rights, gay and transgender people are targets of violence.
In many of the attacks on gay or transgender people, the assailants are total strangers. They attack their victims on sight, without provocation, simply because they... they identify their victim as transgender. In fact, transgender women must live every second of their lives with the knowledge that if they step outside their homes and walk down the street, they may be confronted at any moment by a total stranger pointing at them and exclaiming in total ignorance and stupidity, "That's a man!"
The more interaction I have with the transgender community, the more I see people who seem to be claiming trans because they get off on yelling about how "persecuted" they are. They're not interested in blending in, and yet it's everybody else's problem that they stick out as in-between.
Quote from: Zoogi Zoogi on September 10, 2013, 05:46:46 PM
The more interaction I have with the transgender community, the more I see people who seem to be claiming trans because they get off on yelling about how "persecuted" they are. They're not interested in blending in, and yet it's everybody else's problem that they stick out as in-between.
Not everyone is happy "blending in" to the gender binary that society is trying to push on us. Doesn't make them any less trans. I'm not going to pretend to be something I'm not just to blend in for your sake.
Quote from: Alice Danielle on September 10, 2013, 05:52:50 PM
Not everyone is happy "blending in" to the gender binary that society is trying to push on us. Doesn't make them any less trans. I'm not going to pretend to be something I'm not just to blend in for your sake.
I should clarify what I mean. I'm not talking about sticking to any type of gender roles or stereotypes. I mean coming across as your target sex. Of course there are infinite ways to be a woman, but if you want people to view you as a woman, at least be believable as a woman (whichever "kind" of woman you decide to be). And not for my sake. Reality is reality no matter how much wishing we do.
No, I understood what you meant. Not everyone who is trans is interested in "passing."
Different people express their genders in whatever ways that feel right for them. Some "pass" or "blend" and some don't. This doesn't make anyone else look bad. Everyone deserves the right to live as who they are.
Shana - News Admin
Quote from: Shana A on September 10, 2013, 06:19:45 PM
Different people express their genders in whatever ways that feel right for them. Some "pass" or "blend" and some don't. This doesn't make anyone else look bad. Everyone deserves the right to live as who they are.
Shana
People can play with gender however they want and I legitimately think that's cool. But transition is about which physical sex one is perceived as. What someone likes to do or how they dress has nothing to do with it.
Some might say transition is about becoming more at peace with yourself and has nothing to do with outside perception.
Quote from: Alice Danielle on September 10, 2013, 06:11:26 PM
No, I understood what you meant. Not everyone who is trans is interested in "passing."
And that's ok. But how can a non-passing trans person be surprised when people "misgender" them? How can a transgender person claim to be the opposite sex when it rings true to nobody else?
Quote from: Shana A on September 10, 2013, 06:19:45 PM
Different people express their genders in whatever ways that feel right for them. Some "pass" or "blend" and some don't. This doesn't make anyone else look bad. Everyone deserves the right to live as who they are.
Shana
I totally agree. As long as you're not hurting anyone being seen by others the way you see yourself, then what's the big deal? Nothin' ;)
The reality is... different ways of presenting oneself can mean possible associated risks depending on the area of a city/town, time of day, what you're wearing, the way you're walking, etc. It's all tied in together.
Living in a not so stellarly safe area of Los Angeles as myself means that I have to be smarter on the streets and more aware of my surroundings when I'm out at night. I definitely would not want to give off a "trans" vibe to passersby here. It's just going to vary with every possible scenario, and regardless you have to be one step ahead- whether you are trans or not.
Quote from: Alice Danielle on September 10, 2013, 06:31:55 PM
Some might say transition is about becoming more at peace with yourself and has nothing to do with outside perception.
Changing your body and how you dress is one thing, and I would agree that that's totally personal and up to each person to choose (or not) for themselves. But it's another thing when other people you know, and strangers (basically, everybody else) are expected to deny their intuitive notions about sex and what they've learned about the differences between men and women in order to make you feel better when it doesn't make any sense at all to them and you do nothing to make it make sense to them.
Quote from: Jennygirl on September 10, 2013, 06:34:12 PM
I totally agree. As long as you're not hurting anyone being seen by others the way you see yourself, then what's the big deal? Nothin' ;)
The reality is... different ways of presenting oneself can mean possible associated risks depending on the area of a city/town, time of day, what you're wearing, the way you're walking, etc. It's all tied in together.
Living in a not so stellarly safe area of Los Angeles as myself means that I have to be smarter on the streets and more aware of my surroundings when I'm out at night. I definitely would not want to give off a "trans" vibe to passersby here. It's just going to vary with every possible scenario, and regardless you have to be one step ahead- whether you are trans or not.
Nobody deserves to be assaulted or denied basic rights. I would agree that being aware and honest with oneself and acknowledging reality are the key things.
Quote from: Alice Danielle on September 10, 2013, 06:31:55 PM
Some might say transition is about becoming more at peace with yourself and has nothing to do with outside perception.
In a way, everything is about outside perception. Our entire identity is defined by the way that others see us. I think the main goal of any transition is to be understood by others (both close and random) as our true selves..
Whether a transition is very visual or not doesn't really matter- we want to shape our social identity to match what is felt inside of us. The same can be said about non-trans people. We would all not be ourselves without the definition from others around us.
At any given moment, you can define yourself to the general public in a variety of ways in the form of how you present. Figuring a way that is appropriate and will make you happy, safe, and ultimately
you is no easy task. To me, that is what transitioning is all about... Finding a way to be "you" with the least resistance and highest gain possible.
Quote from: Jennygirl on September 10, 2013, 06:46:23 PM
In a way, everything is about outside perception. Our entire identity is defined by the way that others see us. I think the main goal of any transition is to be understood by others (both close and random) as our true selves..
I'd have to disagree with that. That may be your main goal, or maybe even the most common main goal of trans people. Don't speak for everyone though.
Quote from: Zoogi Zoogi on September 10, 2013, 06:37:36 PM
Changing your body and how you dress is one thing, and I would agree that that's totally personal and up to each person to choose (or not) for themselves. But it's another thing when other people you know, and strangers (basically, everybody else) are expected to deny their intuitive notions about sex and what they've learned about the differences between men and women in order to make you feel better when it doesn't make any sense at all to them and you do nothing to make it make sense to them.
Whether or not our appearaance makes sense
to them, they still do not have the right to get all violent on us. The blame for violence is ALWAYS on the aggressor.
I've been out for more than a year, had no issues re: violence...I dont "live in fear", but I think it is prudent to *always* be aware of one's surroundings, and I have a Plan "B"
just in case someone decides to attack me...