OK, I have never heard of this category before, but the scary thing is that it seems to fit me! I was born male, but had SRS and BA (to a D-Cup) a long time ago ... Back in the '80s. But I've never gone "full time" female, a little cross-dressing, but I continue to embrace my male side as well, and I retain my male name. I wore earrings before they were in vogue (triple pierced ears), I had electrolysis and am now completely hairless (chest, underarms), and after the SRS my legs lost all of their hair as well. I can go into a public pool in a two-piece or as a guy with a XXXL T-Shirt & big trunks. (The SRS is obvious with the two-piece). But I'm still embracing both sides. What does that make me? As you can see, I remain confused ... Or maybe just living on both sides of the fence depending on how I feel that day!
Quote from: Roberto on November 17, 2013, 12:09:57 PM
What does that make me?
It makes you
you!
Here's a handy reference for a number of nonbinary identities out there: http://nonbinary.org/wiki/Nonbinary
But honestly, don't sweat it. You're presenting the way you want to present, you're happy with your body. One of the only purposes of labels is to help you get to that point... but you're already there! If nothing fits, then nothing fits.
Either way, welcome to this part of the forum. :]
Thank you for your support! I'm so happy to find out that I am not alone in the world! 1986 was a long time ago ... I've been "me" now for 27 years and counting. I'd be glad to share experiences ... Even pictures (privately) to anyone interested. Yay! I'm not alone! I'll be checking this site regularly! I found a home!
Oh wow ... After finding this category and these topics, the light bulbs are really coming on. I found a description of myself in a Wikipedia link just by searching for "androgyne" ... Check out this quote from the Wikipedia article:
"Some androgynes are comfortable with their natural body, but some may wish to change it with hormones, surgery, or other technological means just as transsexual people do. But more often than not, androgynes accept their natural body and only wish to have had the body of the other sex as well or specific parts of it. This wish sometimes can be severe and can lead to periods of intense gender dysphoria or transsexual feelings. Some androgynes may proceed with transsexual transition and most happily live with their new body, although a few may regret it later, and not all who transition choose to adopt all characteristics of their new social gender role."
Wow, that's me exactly. Yes, I did change my body. SRS and BA to a D-Cup way back in 1986, but I was never sure about "transsexual feelings". I'm very happy living with my "new body" (now 27 years and counting), and I do NOT regret it later. :angel:
I think I really found my home in this area!
Quote from: Roberto on November 17, 2013, 12:09:57 PM
Or maybe just living on both sides of the fence depending on how I feel that day!
It's a common metaphor round here that male and female are like two different cities but separating those cities is not a simple fence but a large and perplexing forest filled with magical creatures. So instead of being on the fence, maybe you are one of these creatures - one that likes to pop into the cities and do some shopping.
Quote from: Pica Pica on November 17, 2013, 03:27:56 PM
It's a common metaphor round here that male and female are like two different cities but separating those cities is not a simple fence but a large and perplexing forest filled with magical creatures. ...
I think of male and female as more like markers, like the markers on top of a mountain (or the North or South Pole.) People say they are "at the top" or "at the Pole" if there just somewhere nearby, and they really think of themselves as being on that X-marks-the-spot, but really they are just one point of many.
To be less metaphorical: we have these categories/concepts "male" and "female," which nobody fits precisely into. If you come close enough, you twist yourself around so you can believe you fit precisely. If you fit badly, you can either do some really weird and painful twisting and still not fit very well, or you can recognize that, like everybody else, you only partly fit into one or the other (or maybe both.)
Actually, this is true for
any "identity." You see young gay men writing to help boards trying to figure out "how to be gay." Crossdressers writing to ask "how to cross-dress." And, in the USA, we see all the time people going to great lengths to be "real Americans" (and to make rules to decide who isn't a "real American.")
My general advice (which I'm not always very good at following): just try to be yourself. That's already hard enough. "Male," "female," "androgyn," "Martian" -- they're just labels of convenience, like "tall" or "short," to help people recognize you when they have to pick you up at the airport.
Hi ... Thanks for the responses. I really like them. You all make me feel so accepted. And the responses are philosophically very good, and I will take them all to heart. I'm so happy that I found this site, and this particular topic. I feel like I just found by compass heading and will no longer be sailing in circles! Thanks again for your support and responses. Roberto.
Thank you Sarah7 ... Yes, that is comforting to know. For the longest time I felt I was alone in the world! I hope your heavy physical modifications went well. I had the SRS a long time ago (1986). First came breast implants ... The only choice at the time, then at the time of the SRS we did another round of implants so that we could increase the size to a D-Cup. (Hard to do on one go-round from flat.) The other things I've had are in my initial post. Care to share if your body modifications ended up suiting your needs?
We have a ton of information here, too:
https://www.susans.org/wiki/Gender
https://www.susans.org/wiki/Non-binary
Thanks, Wiki Staff!
Hi Sarah7 ... Yah, tattoos. Me too. I just posted something in the TG forum on that one because somebody was asking about tattoos.
Thanks for the links Devlyn ... Looking forward to reading through them! Roberto.