Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Transgender talk => Topic started by: Amy The Bookworm on December 13, 2013, 03:25:00 PM

Title: I came out to my mom today
Post by: Amy The Bookworm on December 13, 2013, 03:25:00 PM
I'm still shaking after several hours. But ... I am so glad I did it and glad it's done with.

The conversation also went far better than I ever thought it would.
Title: Re: I came out to my mom today
Post by: Lauren5 on December 13, 2013, 03:47:12 PM
Hopefully your mom still talks to you.
It can be shocking the responses. I never expected my dad to be with me right away, and I knew it would take mom some time, but I thought she'd try to talk it over with me, not ignore me completely.
Keep us updated on the hopefully good news.
Title: Re: I came out to my mom today
Post by: CindyCD on December 13, 2013, 04:04:08 PM
Hi Amy,

I'm glad it went better than expected. Kudos to you for your courage!

Hugs,
Cindy
Title: Re: I came out to my mom today
Post by: FrancisAnn on December 13, 2013, 04:15:50 PM
Great for you. Your mother is I'm sure the most important person you will ever find in your entire life. If I can suggest: love her always & help her always, try to become a beautiful loving daughter for her.

I so miss my mother that has passed away.
Title: Re: I came out to my mom today
Post by: Gina Taylor on December 13, 2013, 04:21:38 PM
Quote from: CindyCD on December 13, 2013, 04:04:08 PM
Hi Amy,

I'm glad it went better than expected. Kudos to you for your courage!

Hugs,
Cindy

My feelings exactly.  :) I wish mine could have went as smoothly as yours did. Maybe you'll have to let me in on your secret, so I could maybe try it again.  ???
Title: Re: I came out to my mom today
Post by: Rachel on December 13, 2013, 06:03:51 PM
Hugs, congratulations and a third on kudos for the courage!
Title: Re: I came out to my mom today
Post by: Amy The Bookworm on December 14, 2013, 01:21:07 AM
I talked to her a bit on the phone, and just struck up a conversation with her, but didn't bring up what I wanted to tell her but that I'd call back later because I figured she should be at home and not in the middle of the commissary on base when I told her this. She called me back as soon as she got home. I explained that, "Before I tell you this, I need to make 3 things very clear to you."

I don't remember my exact words, but the list I wrote on paper was:

1. I'm terrified to admit this.
2. I know that this is going to be completely out of the blue to you, and I apologize in advance.
3. This is a real, legitimate medical issue, and isn't what's probably going to jump to mind when I tell you this.

Then I took a couple of deep breaths and told her.
She didn't even take three seconds to tell me that it doesn't change how she feels about me, and that while she doesn't know much about it, she has heard about trans people before at least, and she was aware that our lives can be rather challenging. I don't really remember the rest of the conversation really, but she was very supportive, and has offered to help me figure out how to break this to the rest of my family.
Title: Re: I came out to my mom today
Post by: Gina Taylor on December 14, 2013, 01:45:36 AM
Quote from: Amy The Bookworm on December 14, 2013, 01:21:07 AM
I talked to her a bit on the phone, and just struck up a conversation with her, but didn't bring up what I wanted to tell her but that I'd call back later because I figured she should be at home and not in the middle of the commissary on base when I told her this. She called me back as soon as she got home. I explained that, "Before I tell you this, I need to make 3 things very clear to you."

I don't remember my exact words, but the list I wrote on paper was:

1. I'm terrified to admit this.
2. I know that this is going to be completely out of the blue to you, and I apologize in advance.
3. This is a real, legitimate medical issue, and isn't what's probably going to jump to mind when I tell you this.

Then I took a couple of deep breaths and told her.
She didn't even take three seconds to tell me that it doesn't change how she feels about me, and that while she doesn't know much about it, she has heard about trans people before at least, and she was aware that our lives can be rather challenging. I don't really remember the rest of the conversation really, but she was very supportive, and has offered to help me figure out how to break this to the rest of my family.

Really happy for you Amy! Your mom really sounds like she's gonna be very supportive. My problem was was that I had history with my mom, and she had a inkling that somthing was going to be happening, and sure enough that was it. But at least sh edoes believe that my GID is caused from the damage doen to my frontal lobe of my brain, so theer still may be hope.  :eusa_pray:
Title: Re: I came out to my mom today
Post by: MaryXYX on December 14, 2013, 08:51:55 AM
Well done Amy!  I am glad to hear it went well.

As FrancisAnn says "try to become a beautiful loving daughter for her".
Title: Re: I came out to my mom today
Post by: Amy The Bookworm on December 14, 2013, 06:12:09 PM
That's the goal, yes. Thank you all for the kind words of encouragement! ^_^
Title: Re: I came out to my mom today
Post by: Mogu on December 14, 2013, 08:22:28 PM
Sounds like you have a wonderful mother.

Coming out isn't easy, glad you had the courage.