Last night I went to my favorite LGBT club and had a good time. I met up with a few other TG sisters and then when I left I was stopped for a sobriety test. The officer greeted me as "Evening ma'am," which I thought was nice. But I know that most of y'all will say it was just customary. He asked me for my driver's license, which I gave to him and then a few minutes later he came back and said "Have a nice evening Miss XXXX. I found that funny since he saw my male picture on the license and my male name and he refered to me as a 'Miss'. :laugh:
Nice of him to be so respectful. During my first go at transition I used to be so paranoid I'd get pulled over for a drink driving breath test while driving around en femme with a male license. Never happened but I had my excuses all planned in advance.
Quote from: Ms Grace on December 21, 2013, 05:55:51 AM
Nice of him to be so respectful. During my first go at transition I used to be so paranoid I'd get pulled over for a drink driving breath test while driving around en femme with a male license. Never happened but I had my excuses all planned in advance.
That kind of happened to me once a few years ago. I was leaving the same club when a friend came in, so I ended up leaving a little later. I was a little tired when I rolled into my town, and I had been weaving. I pulled into the post office to check my mail, when I saw a police car behind me. The officer told me to keep my hands on the wheel. He came up to me and asked where I was coming from and then he told me that I had been weaving. I was truthful with him and then he asked me to breath in his face and then he wanted me to walk to the front of my vehicle. He then asked me for my license, and I told him it was in the vehicle, and I could hear him say under his breath, "Is it in your purse?"
So I went and got it for him and waited for a few minutes and he came back and as he gave me back my license, he said "It was very nice meeting you."
Officials such as the police are supposed to be trained how to deal with trans* people but it is nice to notice when they are respectful. I don't drink and drive (well - not much ...) and I've never been stopped. The nearest equivalent was the first time I ever had my bus pass checked, which was just after transition so I was still using my male pass. The inspector looked at it and said "This isn't right, is it?" so I put on my deepest pre-transition voice and said "I've only just changed my name and I haven't changed the photo yet". He almost threw the pass back at me and moved hastily on to the next row.
Wow very respectful. I know they are trained to be that way but my guess is that it isn't always ma'am and miss. For me that has been my biggest fear being pulled over and maybe worse getting arrested. I'm very careful not to drink to much when I'm driving but the limit is so low now where I live. I'm always worried even if I only have one drink so usually I don't. Last time I went out I took a cab so I could have a good time and not worry. Ya know what? it was worth it. Both my cab drivers were really friendly and talkative. Of course they would be respectful so they could get a tip but I sensed they were comfortable and it wasn't just an act to get a tip.
Quotethen he wanted me to walk to the front of my vehicle.
I hope they wouldn't make you walk a straight line in heels!
That is a great outcome. You know, it may be worth it to jot down a note and pass it to the Sheriff.
My night was just full of strange occurances.
While I was at the LGBT club, I met this nice young woman {age 24} that I got talking with and we were discusing about our tattoos. I then asked her if she had any other body piercings than the ones I could see {she had her nose pierced and her face pierecd} so she told me that she had her navel piereced and she showed it to me, and I told her that I had had mine done twice but both times they were done too shallow and had fallen out, and now I was left with keloid scars. So she suggestd that if I were to get it done again maybe I should get it done from the bottom, and she told me that that would look sexy. Then she told me that she's got her nipples pierced, and I told her that I wanted to do that as well, so we discused that for a moment, and too my surprise, she allowed me to feel the barbell going through her nipple to see how long it was. Maybe she was comfortable with me as a woman or just comfortable because of the discusion we were having. ??? I'm sure that if I see her again, she'd remember me. :)
That sounds like a really awesome experience, it feels so great to feel like one of the girls.
Quote from: Kaitlin4475 on December 23, 2013, 04:45:01 PM
That sounds like a really awesome experience, it feels so great to feel like one of the girls.
Yeah it was. Sometimes I misjudge myself, becasue I don't realize how good I look {not being conceited} but I guess that people just take me for how I present myself. I was talking with this other guy just before and I think he actually thought I was a woman until something happened but we just sat there and talked for a good twenty minutes and he got close with me. :)
Is it against the law for me to have two driver's licene's, one with my male photo and the other with my female photo?
And could this present some problem with me getting my citizenship, which I am in the process of doing next year?
Hi Gina, if the gender marker on the drivers license is the same and consistent with state law than you are free to present as you like. I would not have one license with the gender marker M and the other F.
Quote from: Cynthia Michelle on December 25, 2013, 08:51:33 PM
Hi Gina, if the gender marker on the drivers license is the same and consistent with state law than you are free to present as you like. I would not have one license with the gender marker M and the other F.
That's what I thought, Cynthia. Everything else will remain the same. The only thing that I'll be changing is my photo, so that when I'm out driving as 'Gina' and if I get pulled over, the picture on my driver's license looks more like me instead of my male counterpart. And then I'll have my other driver's license when I'm driving as my male self.
If you want to make any change to a licence here you have to send them the old one. It's to make it more difficult to create fake identities. I sent in my old licence with a copy of the legal name change and got a new licence with no questions.
Quote from: MaryXYX on December 26, 2013, 05:11:51 AM
If you want to make any change to a licence here you have to send them the old one. It's to make it more difficult to create fake identities. I sent in my old licence with a copy of the legal name change and got a new licence with no questions.
Thanks Mary. I'll be going over to the DMV just to double check on everything before I do it. I do know that I'm technically not supposed to have two driver's licenses but not at one time are they going to be on my person. I'll let y'all know how it turns out.
How the police respond is an "It depends" situation that varies mainly by jurisdiction and a little by state guidlines. More and more these days they are more sensitive to the TG community. Years ago the horror stories far outweighed the lucky ones. That drove a lot of the demand for a "Carry Letter" to hopefully get you out of trouble. (Keep in mind many places have laws specifically against "Hiding your identity" which presenting as a person of the opposite sex sure counts as)
DMV regulations vary by state. FL may just allow a photo update since your appearance has changed sigficantly. THe gender marker is a lot trickier. Some states require a birth certificate gender change, others even a letter from a therapist works. Names these post 9/11 days require legal paperwork.
A search of some state oriented LGBT organizations may have specifics on where you live. A local TG group will certainly have others that went through the process and can help with specific questions and problems
More and more I'm viewed as female. I have dined in restaurants, interacted with the public, and shopped. I get hit on at least once when I'm out.
:)
Quote from: Gina Taylor on December 26, 2013, 07:07:17 AM
Thanks Mary. I'll be going over to the DMV just to double check on everything before I do it. I do know that I'm technically not supposed to have two driver's licenses but not at one time are they going to be on my person. I'll let y'all know how it turns out.
I found out today that it is illegal for me to have two driver's licenses in the state of Florida. So when I go Full Time, I will then have my photo changed on my driver's license. Looks like that time will be coming up very soon . . .
Quote from: Gina Taylor on December 21, 2013, 05:21:36 AM
Last night I went to my favorite LGBT club and had a good time. I met up with a few other TG sisters and then when I left I was stopped for a sobriety test. The officer greeted me as "Evening ma'am," which I thought was nice. But I know that most of y'all will say it was just customary. He asked me for my driver's license, which I gave to him and then a few minutes later he came back and said "Have a nice evening Miss XXXX. I found that funny since he saw my male picture on the license and my male name and he refered to me as a 'Miss'. :laugh:
Apparently my mom checked out this site and read this section and her comment on this post was that the police office was humoring the situation.
Quote from: Gina Taylor on January 07, 2014, 02:43:07 PM
Apparently my mom checked out this site and read this section and her comment on this post was that the police office was humoring the situation.
Perhaps he was, but he probably didn't have to. It was polite.
Quote from: MaryXYX on January 07, 2014, 04:41:40 PM
Perhaps he was, but he probably didn't have to. It was polite.
Y'know Mary, I'm thinking the same thing. But I don't know why my mom had to bring it up and make me look bad. ???
Quote from: Gina Taylor on January 08, 2014, 11:40:35 AM
I don't know why my mom had to bring it up and make me look bad. ???
True. If she didn't have a supportive comment she could have made no comment at all.
Quote from: MaryXYX on January 08, 2014, 12:30:58 PM
True. If she didn't have a supportive comment she could have made no comment at all.
You're absolutely right there Mary. Just like the old saying, "If you don't have anything good to say, don't say anything at all."
I was just talking with a friend who's in her first year of law, and she told me that when a police officer saw me, he has to respect em for who I am. Even after he sees my driver's license, he still has to respect me as a female.
Gina glad the officer was nice to you. And that you were good to drive. I Gulled over in January and was drunk. I regret that I fudged up. I had to tak the test in barefeet. And spent the night in a colld cell in my dress. But have to say I was treated well by the deputies and only got a few stares froom other prisoners
Quote from: kellypatrick on February 27, 2014, 04:32:27 PM
Gina glad the officer was nice to you. And that you were good to drive. I Gulled over in January and was drunk. I regret that I fudged up. I had to tak the test in barefeet. And spent the night in a cold cell in my dress. But have to say I was treated well by the deputies and only got a few stares froom other prisoners.
I'm really sorry to hear about your situation. :( Whenever we go to the LGBT club I'm always the designated driver, but I'm not much of a drinker anyways. The most I'll drink is maybe three beers a month. Never really acquired the taste for it. ??? You're actually lucky that you only got a few stares from the other prisoners, and that you didn't get into a bawl with any of them.
Quote from: MaryXYX on January 08, 2014, 12:30:58 PM
True. If she didn't have a supportive comment she could have made no comment at all.
One slight suggested edit - should instead of could. Plus one for if you don't have anything good to say don't say anything at all.
That sounds awesome, it's great of him to be respectful :) I mean, I don't know if it's common or not, but even if it is, it must feel nice that people respect you to address you as miss or ma'am or something like that.