So this cis guy at work says he wants my number once he gets his new phone. I'm assuming he likes me, though I can be dense sometimes. In previous convos I know he perceives me as female. If it comes to a first date should I just come out and say I'm trans? Then I wouldn't get my hopes up of someone liking me if he has an issue dating another guy. Though I am quite surprised as I'm the least girl looking person in the building. Least I think he likes me, he goes out of his way to get me things when I come in to work and always talks to me, the other guys just kind of walk by.
I would just say, "You know I'm a guy, right?" and see what he says. I never use the trans word regarding myself, except in trans forums online.
Even while pre everything? I can imagine he would just be like "what" then I'd have to explain anyways.
It all depends on you. Would you be comfortable dating this person if he sees you as a female? If so, then there's no rush. If not, in order to be on the safe side and not get hurt/get really dysphoric about this, I'd say let him know you're a guy. Even pre-op. Your parts may not match the general view of what a guy is yet, but your mind is. And yes, this may raise questions, but it could be an opportunity to educate him a little. Who knows, he could be in to you being just you, regardless of what gender label would be attached.
I did once go out with a guy where I said I made it clear I was a guy just by using male pronome on myself.
Certain jobs have this kind of gender-labed words I can't think of too many words in english, but like waitor/waitress, steward/stewardess, if you used this word pretty casually in a conversation I think he wont think too much about it, if he go like "arnt you a stewardess?" then he view you as female.
Well it's not so much that he sees me as a guy it's that I just don't want him to assume I'm just a boy looking girl. Idunno I want to be fair to him somehow.
Quote from: Alexthecat on December 25, 2013, 11:41:38 AM
Well it's not so much that he sees me as a guy it's that I just don't want him to assume I'm just a boy looking girl. Idunno I want to be fair to him somehow.
if you in a conversation make a statement like . "im the only male servent on the resturant" "im the oldest brother in the famely"
bla bla bla, then he would probably get it.