My Dad has known since April, shortly before I had my voice surgery (I came out to him over the phone). He told the rest of that side of the family and I heard nothing but open acceptance, love, and pride immediately. What a dream.
Though a few nights ago, I had the pleasure of seeing my father and that side of the family in person for the first time since coming out and transitioning. The whole experience was wonderful... from clutching him close upon arrival, to hearing him say just how amazing I was and go on about my voice, to hanging with my other relatives... including my younger half sister who took one look at me and said "you look awesome" under her breath and asked me if I had highlights. When I said yes, she said "so cool! So this is what I would look like with highlights! I knew I should get them." CUTE!
The night was filled with great questions from all of them, with my favorite part of the night being when everyone left and I spent two hours going over (in utmost detail) the entire history of my transness and related path through life with my Dad and step mother (my parents were divorced when I was 2.5 and he I kept all things of this nature hidden from him until coming out). At the end before I left, he made me cry by saying. "I really feel like I know you so much better. I've never been more proud of you than I am at this moment." The waterworks on the way home to my mom's were nothing short of spectacular.
Okay okay, but the best part didn't come until this morning in the form of a Facebook message from my Dad. After a few short messages of giving thanks to each other (which were notably wonderful on their own), he suddenly and completely blew me away. This is what he said...
(in reference to our visit)
Quote:) Yes, it was incredible...and fascinating, enlightening and comforting...I could go on and on with the adjectives :-) You however, are beyond words. I truly admire your introspection and your ability to confront the unconfrontable....to eliminate the noise and chatter that usually clouds one's ability to choose the correct path. It is with great pride, myself, that I can say "this is my daughter"...after all, you've ALWAYS been my daughter...it's only now that you've been able to remove yourself from your youthful cocoon and show the world your true beauty, with a glow and radiance unlike ever before. Welcome home Jenny. Thank you for being such a fantastic part of my life. I love you...forever and a day..."
Oh my god. This trip has been filled with tears of joy, but none until like now. I knew immediately that I had to share this message with you all because every time I read it I begin to cry towards the end, and I wanted for him to be recognized in any way possible to me as such a shining example of how amazing parents can be even after their child transitions... I welcome you to share your wonderful stories of love and happiness with your families, too. I think we would all love to hear about it.
Even if you might not have anything to add to this thread of love and acceptance, I hope it warms up your holiday spirits, and may we all smile bright for those of us who are reunited happily with our families- whether for the first time since transitioning, if they have known who we are for a while, or even if our best times are yet to come.
Happy holidays everyone.
So much love,
Jenny
Aww that is SO AWESOME! I'm really happy for you Jenny! It's wonderful that you have a father that is so insightful and loving.
Thanks for sharing that, hon! <dashing off for the Kleenex>
Hugs, Devlyn
I made the mistake of putting on my makeup right before reading the beautiful words from your father. You are blessed to have such an open minded, loving dad.
Passing the box of kleenex to the next person who reads your post.
Merry Christmas
Bethany Dawn
That's a great dad right there! I'm so happy for you Jenny. I have a good relationship with my father, but him truly accepting me for who I am has not really happened yet. It's been mostly a "don't ask, don't tell" kind of thing with him. He never took any interest in knowing the details and whenever I bring things up (like when I told him I'd be getting VFS) he just squirms awkwardly. Today will actually be the first time I'm going to see him now that I can talk again, so I'm curious what his reaction will be.
Anyways, sorry to bring the cheeriness down. I really am glad you are having such positive reactions from seemingly everyone in your life. You definitely deserve it!
Jenny - you have an awesome father! What you posted makes me happy!
I wish my own parents were like yours - i just came out to them and the response wasn't quite like the one you got. You are a very fortunate girl indeed!
I am so completely aware today of how blessed I am to have my father, and I'm SO happy to cheer you all up!! It's just the best thing ever as a member here to bring a smile to someone else's face. Everyone deserves a little nugget of happiness today no matter how big nor small!!
I LOVE YOU SUSANS!!
Jenny,
This is beyond sweet and I'm very happy that everything went the way it did. You deserve it. Also, thank you for sharing. It's nice to hear positive family stories and it gives me hope for the future with my own.
Ack! Shoulda had a cry warning on this one. ;_; *sniffles*
Wow. That's fantastic! Thank you for sharing.
wow thats so awesome , my dream too is to be able to spent time with my family as my true self, everyone knows about me but the havent seen me as a girl,,, maybe Ill visit on summer see how it goes,,,
btw my father was very accepting as well, ill meet him tonight actually :angel:
Thank you, Jenny, for sharing these words of hope and joy! I'm ecstatic for you!
*happy dance* :)
*hug*
You have a way cool dad, what a thoughtful, caring and understanding person. 8)
Fantastic, what a man! What a Dad! What a daughter!
We a Kleenex trigger warning!
*snif*
Your dad is awesome, and so are you.
Quote from: Jennygirl on December 24, 2013, 08:58:58 AM
At the end before I left, he made me cry by saying. "I really feel like I know you so much better. I've never been more proud of you than I am at this moment." The waterworks on the way home to my mom's were nothing short of spectacular.
That is so incredibly awesome! ;)
Thanks for the holiday "gift" sniffle sniffle, grabs kleenex
Aint life grand!
Your sniffles and Kleenex donations are all wonderful!
Really hope everyone is having a good day today whether you are with family or not, being super active or just hanging out!
I am having a wonderful day and seeing all of your loving reactions here is only making it even better. I'll have to let my dad know the impact he has had.
Thanks everyone :) Stay warm out there!
That is so beautiful, Jenny! Now I have to join the rest with the kleenex *sniff*
:)
Thanks for sharing - your journey is inspiring to me.
Jenny, thank you for sharing this true meaning of Christmas. This is a story of love and acceptance.
Quote from: Jennygirl on December 24, 2013, 08:58:58 AM
My Dad has known since April, shortly before I had my voice surgery (I came out to him over the phone). He told the rest of that side of the family and I heard nothing but open acceptance, love, and pride immediately. What a dream.
Though a few nights ago, I had the pleasure of seeing my father and that side of the family in person for the first time since coming out and transitioning. The whole experience was wonderful... from clutching him close upon arrival, to hearing him say just how amazing I was and go on about my voice, to hanging with my other relatives... including my younger half sister who took one look at me and said "you look awesome" under her breath and asked me if I had highlights. When I said yes, she said "so cool! So this is what I would look like with highlights! I knew I should get them." CUTE!
The night was filled with great questions from all of them, with my favorite part of the night being when everyone left and I spent two hours going over (in utmost detail) the entire history of my transness and related path through life with my Dad and step mother (my parents were divorced when I was 2.5 and he I kept all things of this nature hidden from him until coming out). At the end before I left, he made me cry by saying. "I really feel like I know you so much better. I've never been more proud of you than I am at this moment." The waterworks on the way home to my mom's were nothing short of spectacular.
Okay okay, but the best part didn't come until this morning in the form of a Facebook message from my Dad. After a few short messages of giving thanks to each other (which were notably wonderful on their own), he suddenly and completely blew me away. This is what he said...
(in reference to our visit)
Oh my god. This trip has been filled with tears of joy, but none until like now. I knew immediately that I had to share this message with you all because every time I read it I begin to cry towards the end, and I wanted for him to be recognized in any way possible to me as such a shining example of how amazing parents can be even after their child transitions... I welcome you to share your wonderful stories of love and happiness with your families, too. I think we would all love to hear about it.
Even if you might not have anything to add to this thread of love and acceptance, I hope it warms up your holiday spirits, and may we all smile bright for those of us who are reunited happily with our families- whether for the first time since transitioning, if they have known who we are for a while, or even if our best times are yet to come.
Happy holidays everyone.
So much love,
Jenny
Kia Ora Jenny,
Your dad sounds like a "New Age" dad...A real gentleman...
Metta Zenda :)
Jennygirl,
It is encouraging to know that positive outcomes are possible. We need that sometimes. I also believe you deserve some accolades for this result. Working with parents can be difficult and you put some effort in the communication. Well done.
Quote from: Jennygirl on December 24, 2013, 05:35:57 PM
Stay warm out there!
I'm 250 or so miles north of my home. It's like -14F out there and windchills are hovering around -40F!! But it's warm in this house and warmer inside me becasue of your post. Thank you.
Hugs,
Jen
That sounds like such a great amazing, I feel like my father will not respond the same way. He knows about me from when I was younger but thinks I out grew my "phase." I'm going to tell my whole family soon, I hope they respond just as yours did. Yours just seems like it is such a heart warming and self assuring experience :)
Thank you all for the wonderful responses... This Christmas visit will never be forgotten for me and the validation I have received here only adds to the great memory of it :) thank you so much!
My uncle got around to posting some photos from that night I visited with my dad... Here is a pic of my step mom, dad, me, and my younger half sis :)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2F4qicdOQ.jpg&hash=907d67d45fe198572ac0661ad7ed79064aac9f1c)
Your Dad is beaming and you all look genuinely happy Jenny. Well deserved and so sweet.
Thanks Tessa!
:D :D :D
Gorgeous!
Hi,
Sounds real cool to me and lovely with those around you as well.
...noeleena...
Congratulations to you and all your family. Acceptance like theirs is wonderful, give them a hug for me.
Karen.
Your dad sounds like an amazing person. :) reading that made me start to tear up a bit :p So happy you have found so much acceptance from your family.
Lexi
I wanna cry now. Youre so blessed to have such an accepting family and father...
Thank you everyone for the amazing responses. I sent this thread to my dad and he said he cried when he read it
:D :D :D
Happy new year everyone!!
I once told MaidofOrleans that I wanted her mother to adopt me. If she won't, then I would be equally happy with your dad :D
You are blessed Jenny. It sounds like both your parents and step parents are really loving open minded ppl :). Glad it went so well for you.