I hate asking my dad for that stuff that girls use every month, It's humiliating and unfair that I have to deal with these things, Honestly I couldn't but to cry it just fustrates me, And my mom not helping talking about it's a cleanse in our body and that she wants to teach me how to insert tampons, That's nasty and did not help, I wanted to punch a wall or throw something, I'm so built up in Anger and rage mostly because I keep forgetting that it even happens to me, I can't wait till it's gone!
Hey, Sorry for your pain man. I know it sucks, one day you can be worry free ! Have you ever thought about going on birth control? If you look it up on line there's ways that you can take it to extend the time between them? I have heard of some guys doing that though I have never myself. Research on google a little bit maybe you can see what I am talking about.
Though you need a doctor to prescribe to birth control!
Good luck man
Quote from: thatboyfresh on December 26, 2013, 04:07:54 PM
Hey, Sorry for your pain man. I know it sucks, one day you can be worry free ! Have you ever thought about going on birth control? If you look it up on line there's ways that you can take it to extend the time between them? I have heard of some guys doing that though I have never myself. Research on google a little bit maybe you can see what I am talking about.
Though you need a doctor to prescribe to birth control!
Good luck man
No I'm not because it makes your breast grow larget and I really can't stand the sight of that
I know your dad said he'd bring you to a gender therapist, have you gotten any further along in finding one?
You could tell your dad it is embarrassing for you to have to ask him for that stuff, and maybe he would agree to put a little money in a jar every month so you could buy the stuff for yourself when you go out without asking. When he notices the money is gone he could just stick more in it. That way you'd never have to discuss it.
Quote from: Simon on December 26, 2013, 05:32:30 PM
You could tell your dad it is embarrassing for you to have to ask him for that stuff, and maybe he would agree to put a little money in a jar every month so you could buy the stuff for yourself when you go out without asking. When he notices the money is gone he could just stick more in it. That way you'd never have to discuss it.
I don't ever go out and get them my dad does I personally don't even like going in that section, Tha's even worse but that's just me
Quote from: LearnedHand on December 26, 2013, 04:44:54 PM
I know your dad said he'd bring you to a gender therapist, have you gotten any further along in finding one?
I haven't had any luck finding one my school counselour said she'd help
Leave a note for him or send a text. I can't stand buying or asking for that stuff anymore than you can. I actually leave it as late as possible to do so, hoping someone else will notice. Sometimes I'd left it so long that I had to tell them to go to the shops there and then, because there was nothing left. Since I've moved out I've got to buy them for myself, but the road I have to cross to get to the shop scares me to death (I've been nervous crossing roads since my accident a year ago, and it's so much larger than anything in the countryside where I grew up), and I get depressed and lethargic at that time. It doesn't help that people volunteer to go with you if they know you're going, but I get too self conscious to buy them with company. I ended up "borrowing" some at the end of last time, and refusing to buy more until I went to my parents for Christmas, nodded at them in the shop and mumbled "I need those".
Some guys find tampons help as you can forget about them once they're in. I keep meaning to try, I tried them before but never trusted them to work and took them out before I left the bathroom. I was scared of getting it on me with them too, but a guy suggested wrapping paper around my hand first so that couldn't happen.
Don't forget that cis guys sometimes have to use them too. My grandfather had a prostate biopsy a few years ago and was given pads in case of any bleeding. He had to use them too (after my nan taught him how, he thought they stuck on himself like a plaster!) And I mean actual sanitary pads, not incontinence ones or anything.
Quote from: AlexanderC on December 26, 2013, 08:41:42 PM
Leave a note for him or send a text. I can't stand buying or asking for that stuff anymore than you can. I actually leave it as late as possible to do so, hoping someone else will notice. Sometimes I'd left it so long that I had to tell them to go to the shops there and then, because there was nothing left. Since I've moved out I've got to buy them for myself, but the road I have to cross to get to the shop scares me to death (I've been nervous crossing roads since my accident a year ago, and it's so much larger than anything in the countryside where I grew up), and I get depressed and lethargic at that time. It doesn't help that people volunteer to go with you if they know you're going, but I get too self conscious to buy them with company. I ended up "borrowing" some at the end of last time, and refusing to buy more until I went to my parents for Christmas, nodded at them in the shop and mumbled "I need those".
Some guys find tampons help as you can forget about them once they're in. I keep meaning to try, I tried them before but never trusted them to work and took them out before I left the bathroom. I was scared of getting it on me with them too, but a guy suggested wrapping paper around my hand first so that couldn't happen.
Don't forget that cis guys sometimes have to use them too. My grandfather had a prostate biopsy a few years ago and was given pads in case of any bleeding. He had to use them too (after my nan taught him how, he thought they stuck on himself like a plaster!) And I mean actual sanitary pads, not incontinence ones or anything.
Yea... But how often do you find not trying to be an ass just asking, My dad thinks its funny that I call myself a man yet has to deal with thoes
Quote from: Brandon on December 26, 2013, 08:51:39 PM
Yea... But how often do you find not trying to be an ass just asking, My dad thinks its funny that I call myself a man yet has to deal with thoes
Sorry, I didn't understand a word of the first part of that...
Men are awkward around this whole thing to begin with, he probably doesn't know how to react, or can't imagine himself (the first example of a man he'd think of) dealing with it.
I'm not trying to make light of your guy's situation with those products because I remember before my hysto being annoyed with it. I did want to say that if you pass most of the time that nobody in the shops really gives second thoughts to a man buying that stuff. I will pick some up for my wife if she needs it without a second thought...a lot of guys do.
There's also a lot of reusable products. Buy it once, never be bothered again.
Washable pads: http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=a9_sc_1?rh=i%3Aaps%2Ck%3Areusable+menstrual+pads&keywords=reusable+menstrual+pads&ie=UTF8&qid=1388114899
For those able to stand the thought: http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_1?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=menstrual+cup&rh=i%3Aaps%2Ck%3Amenstrual+cup
I haven't had to bother going to the feminine hygiene section since spring. A $30 investment has since saved me lots of time and money, and I never have to worry about running out of products.
Quote from: AlexanderC on December 26, 2013, 08:57:20 PM
Sorry, I didn't understand a word of the first part of that...
Men are awkward around this whole thing to begin with, he probably doesn't know how to react, or can't imagine himself (the first example of a man he'd think of) dealing with it.
I meant to say its not often that you find a man wearing pads, How do you think I feel, I feel awkward when I hear girls talk about that me and my boys just give em that look, I mean I just know figured out why you shouldn't ask a girl if their on their period, Yucky yucky, Heck my mom has me go in and grab hers sometimes
Quote from: Simon on December 26, 2013, 09:03:06 PM
I'm not trying to make light of your guy's situation with those products because I remember before my hysto being annoyed with it. I did want to say that if you pass most of the time that nobody in the shops really gives second thoughts to a man buying that stuff. I will pick some up for my wife if she needs it without a second thought...a lot of guys do.
Well I know that I get them for my mom sometimes
Quote from: LearnedHand on December 26, 2013, 09:31:04 PM
There's also a lot of reusable products. Buy it once, never be bothered again.
Washable pads: http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=a9_sc_1?rh=i%3Aaps%2Ck%3Areusable+menstrual+pads&keywords=reusable+menstrual+pads&ie=UTF8&qid=1388114899
For those able to stand the thought: http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_1?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=menstrual+cup&rh=i%3Aaps%2Ck%3Amenstrual+cup
I haven't had to bother going to the feminine hygiene section since spring. A $30 investment has since saved me lots of time and money, and I never have to worry about running out of products
Well since I'm going to transition soon I won't do that, Because I nly have on more year and by then Ill have a T letter
What I'm trying to get you to see if that you're not the only guy who has to use them. There are not only trans guys, but also cis guys who have to use them. And trust me, they're just as unhappy about it as we are.
I know how you feel, I can't stand it either. I don't know why they want to talk about it, or what's interesting about it, but they do. You're not the only one.
Quote from: AlexanderC on December 26, 2013, 10:13:11 PM
What I'm trying to get you to see if that you're not the only guy who has to use them. There are not only trans guys, but also cis guys who have to use them. And trust me, they're just as unhappy about it as we are.
I know how you feel, I can't stand it either. I don't know why they want to talk about it, or what's interesting about it, but they do. You're not the only one.
I understand that I'm just saying it's rare, And I shouldn't have to go through this at all it's really embarrasing and humiliating, Its like a slap in the face, And that I'm getting laughed, This is when I get suicidal the most
Quote from: Brandon on December 26, 2013, 10:19:47 PM
I understand that I'm just saying it's rare, And I shouldn't have to go through this at all it's really embarrasing and humiliating, Its like a slap in the face, And that I'm getting laughed, This is when I get suicidal the most
You might understand the words, but you're not grasping that your perspective has to change for you to be able to deal with it better. You aren't alone in this, you're in the same situation as trans and cis guys all over the world. We can't change the fact that, for now, it happens to us, but we can change the way we cope.
I'm the same. I get depressed, I don't talk if I can help it, I snap at my friends, I skip meals, and yeah, the last time I was so close to ending it all. It would never have worked, but that's not the point, at that moment I would have done and tried anything which might have. That was my lowest point in two years, and it wouldn't have happened if it wasn't for that. Not even my missus knows that happened.
You reckon you'll be on T in a year, what's that 14 times at most? Stock up now and you'll only have to ask 7 or 8 times more. How long does the stress of asking last? 5 minutes at most? That's 35 minutes of your life, not even an hour.
Ask over text, ask cryptically, think of a different name to it (I can only warn the missus by telling her that I'm laying [eggs] because I can't bring myself to say the words), listen to loud music when you're changing to distract yourself, stuff toilet paper up your nose, find what helps you cope, and do it. It won't get easier if you don't try things.
Quote from: Brandon on December 26, 2013, 04:35:21 PM
No I'm not because it makes your breast grow larget and I really can't stand the sight of that
I've been on birth control for over a year, my time of the month is super short and only one day is pad-worthy. And I have had literally no physical changes. Same as I was two years ago, just older-looking. Definitely no chest growth.
Look into the different options out there before saying no to them all. There's even non-hormonal ones if the estrogen puts you off.
Quote from: AlexanderC on December 26, 2013, 10:42:39 PM
You might understand the words, but you're not grasping that your perspective has to change for you to be able to deal with it better. You aren't alone in this, you're in the same situation as trans and cis guys all over the world. We can't change the fact that, for now, it happens to us, but we can change the way we cope.
I'm the same. I get depressed, I don't talk if I can help it, I snap at my friends, I skip meals, and yeah, the last time I was so close to ending it all. It would never have worked, but that's not the point, at that moment I would have done and tried anything which might have. That was my lowest point in two years, and it wouldn't have happened if it wasn't for that. Not even my missus knows that happened.
You reckon you'll be on T in a year, what's that 14 times at most? Stock up now and you'll only have to ask 7 or 8 times more. How long does the stress of asking last? 5 minutes at most? That's 35 minutes of your life, not even an hour.
Ask over text, ask cryptically, think of a different name to it (I can only warn the missus by telling her that I'm laying [eggs] because I can't bring myself to say the words), listen to loud music when you're changing to distract yourself, stuff toilet paper up your nose, find what helps you cope, and do it. It won't get easier if you don't try things.
I get what your saying but Bio guys don't get thoes that's my point yea they use em but not for the same reasons, I get it though, I really can't cope with being male and having thoes, Yea maybe temporarily but my thoughts are still there about everything, That's nasty feeling blood come out of you and it's fustrating, I can't really deal, And don't know how much longer I can take
Quote from: Brandon on December 26, 2013, 10:52:49 PM
I get what your saying but Bio guys don't get thoes that's my point yea they use em but not for the same reasons, I get it though, I really can't cope with being male and having thoes, Yea maybe temporarily but my thoughts are still there about everything, That's nasty feeling blood come out of you and it's fustrating, I can't really deal, And don't know how much longer I can take
Thats kinda the point, we arent bioguys, we have to make decisions and put things into place so that we can deal with things, sure it sucks, you bet your ass its unfair, but its life, and when youre stuck between and a rock and a hard place, you move that ->-bleeped-<-ing rock, if its too heavy, you ask someone to help you move it.
look into the pill, it'll stop it, problem solved, as others have mentioned theres zero hormonal alternatives, utilise them.
I'm on depo provera, a shot every 3 months and there is no problems. At the most there is a bit of spotting which you don't even need a pad for, you just need to wash your underwear a lot.
And no I haven't noticed any breast growth, I hear it makes you gain weight but I'm in the same size I was before I started depo. You exercise it won't be a problem. Think it's been 3 years now.
Brandon,
Can a mature women comment?
Life sucks.
It is hell for all of us, no one has it easy, no one has a smooth ride, there is nothing no one ever gives us.
It doesn't matter if you are trans or cis, straight or Gay, rich or poor, male or female.
Life sucks.
But you are lucky, luckier than most, you have men that I utterly respect and feel in awe of willing to help you.
You need to listen to them.
Yes your life is tough, yes you struggle but you are on a support site that wants to help you.
You are lucky.
But you have to let the help through.
Your life is tough?
I doubt that you would have survived 10 seconds of some of my past experiences when I was your age.
I had no advice. I had no one who cared.
I had an owner. He sure as Hell didn't care as long as I brought the money in.
I overcame it, you can as well.
I managed to be end up a happy and gorgeous woman; even if I have to say so myself.
You can be as incredible as the other guys are here.
If you listen to them.
Listen to them.
Please
Cindy
I use tampons which are best for me. I don't want to take any form of BC, don't want any more hormones in me. Pads between your legs keep reminding you that you are bleeding and feel wet all the time. I looked at those cups and decided quickly I couldn't handle those parts of me to get one in and out again, also it would be so easy to get the contents of the cup on your fingers and hands. I get cramps the before I start so I know every month when it will happen and I can have a tampon ready to put in. After that I can forget that I am bleeding, as I only know it is happening when I have to change. I have a Sam's card and buy the large box of tampons so I only have to buy them every few months. When I can start T they will be gone forever.
Quote from: mm on December 27, 2013, 03:22:56 PM
I use tampons which are best for me. I don't want to take any form of BC, don't want any more hormones in me. Pads between your legs keep reminding you that you are bleeding and feel wet all the time. I looked at those cups and decided quickly I couldn't handle those parts of me to get one in and out again, also it would be so easy to get the contents of the cup on your fingers and hands. I get cramps the before I start so I know every month when it will happen and I can have a tampon ready to put in. After that I can forget that I am bleeding, as I only know it is happening when I have to change. I have a Sam's card and buy the large box of tampons so I only have to buy them every few months. When I can start T they will be gone forever.
I'm not comfortable with using thoes, I don't want anything going up their that makes me cringe I don't even like the thought, I get cramps to so I know otherwise I forget that's he only reason I remeber, I keep forgetting that I still have to deal with thoes
Brandon, each one has to deal the problem with what works best for
them until they can stop the bleeding altogether. I told what I do. You can do what works for you.
Quote from: mm on December 27, 2013, 03:46:01 PM
Brandon, each one has to deal the problem with what works best for
them until they can stop the bleeding altogether. I told what I do. You can do what works for you.
I know I was just letting you know, But really I don't know what to do about that problem, I'll probaly just start working out again to distract me from that, I mean it worked before but sometimes I just get to dysphoric and caught in my feelings that it stops me and makes me want to do nothing
Would it be possible to get your parents to order stuff online for you? There's always drugstore.com.
Quote from: insideontheoutside on December 27, 2013, 04:04:27 PM
Would it be possible to get your parents to order stuff online for you? There's always drugstore.com.
It depends on what it is, If it's to stop em then no but maybe for other things
Quote from: Brandon on December 27, 2013, 04:19:17 PM
It depends on what it is, If it's to stop em then no but maybe for other things
I mean just the regular shark week supplies. Think of drugstore.com like a giant Rite Aid/Walgreens online.
Quote from: insideontheoutside on December 27, 2013, 04:23:54 PM
I mean just the regular shark week supplies. Think of drugstore.com like a giant Rite Aid/Walgreens online.
They probaly would, I never go with my dad to get them anyways
Quote from: Brandon on December 27, 2013, 04:26:24 PM
They probaly would, I never go with my dad to get them anyways
What I am gathering is it's not the supplies that bother you. It's the fact that you have to deal with having the damned thing in the first place. I think we've all been in that situation. I know, I know you say it makes you cringe to think about using tampons but if you never have tried one it's worth it. There is no mess, no stains, no wetness, you can play sports, you don't really have to look at it, you can't feel blood leaking out, and none of that god awful smell. It is worth giving a try. Just go small and get plastic ones (the cardboard ones aren't nearly as comfortable).
Also, with birth control you don't go up breast size that is a myth. There are many different types and I think you would do good to talk to your doctor about it before you cancel it out. I work in a medical clinic and get to hear about all different types of med's including bc. There's shots, pills, even patches. There's a shot that you can get every 3 months that someone already mentioned and you hardly get any bleeding at all . Also there are ones with very low hormone doses which can lighten what you have to deal with.