Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Transsexual talk => Topic started by: brianna1016 on February 24, 2014, 01:24:03 AM

Title: Daddy Issues..
Post by: brianna1016 on February 24, 2014, 01:24:03 AM
Do you have them?

I know I do  ;) As I continue to unravel the mystery of why I am a transsexual, I can't help but think about how my life would have turned out if my father would have been there. He left for good shortly after I was born. Growing up I had 2 different stepfathers. One was a delusional sociopath who beat up on my mom and scared the crap out of me, the other was a textbook Mormon who I have nothing in common with. Neither of them did a good job "fathering" me. They barely even tried.  I've always had this very negative image of men. And look what happened. I'm pretty sure it would have happened anyway, but my lack of a positive relationship with the men who were supposed to be my father sealed the deal.
Title: Re: Daddy Issues..
Post by: FalseHybridPrincess on February 24, 2014, 01:27:44 AM
I grew up without a father too...

but why am I trans and my brother isnt :/
Title: Re: Re: Daddy Issues..
Post by: brianna1016 on February 24, 2014, 01:48:20 AM
Quote from: FalsePrincess on February 24, 2014, 01:27:44 AM
I grew up without a father too...

but why am I trans and my brother isnt :/
Yeah my brothers aren't trans either.
Title: Re: Daddy Issues..
Post by: Emi on February 24, 2014, 05:08:30 AM
My dad died when I was about 7 but I didnt know him very much. I saw him about once or twice a year.
I have a father in law and he's really nice with me, my 2 brothers, and my sister.
But look now I'm accepting myself as transgender, and one of my brother is the exact opposite ; an homophobic idiot bodybuilder...
I don't think our family make us who we are, it's just in our minds. We make ourselves.
Title: Re: Daddy Issues..
Post by: Jess42 on February 24, 2014, 09:41:39 AM
Well I can tell you that being trans isn't from the lack of the father being around. Mine was around and I'm still trans. I got taught all the "boystuff" and it didn't make a difference in the world. Got taught how to hunt, fish, throw a football, baseball and all those things. I hated and still hate touching fish and dressing animals unless I absolutely have to and as for the footall and baseball or sports in general, I would rather curl up with a glass of wine and a good book. Oh not to mention frogs, lizards and all the other creepy things boys like to catch and play with, I was with most of the other girls on that one for sure.
Title: Re: Daddy Issues..
Post by: Lauren5 on February 24, 2014, 09:50:07 AM
I feared that my gender identity would be dismissed, as, at first due to the military, starting in the spring of 2006 when my dad was deployed to Afghanistan, my dad was only home for 2 of the last 8 years, and it would be viewed as he was not there to "train me as a man," which was a huge worry that that would be what he and MHPs would think, and dismiss my gender identity, and tell me that now I'd have to start learning to be a man and forget I ever felt female at all.

It was a really scary though, that fortunately didn't become an issue.
Title: Re: Daddy Issues..
Post by: timbuck2 on February 24, 2014, 05:58:46 PM
I doubt having or not having a father around would effect someone being transsexual. My dad was always around. I was a rough and tumble kid who loved sports and action figures, while my brother was a soft spoken boy who loved dancing and reading but I'm trans and my brother is not.
Title: Re: Daddy Issues..
Post by: Edge on February 24, 2014, 06:44:59 PM
If "daddy issues" had anything to do with being trans, there would be a heck of a lot more trans people and we would be able to be cured with therapy, but there aren't and we aren't.
Title: Re: Daddy Issues..
Post by: sad panda on February 25, 2014, 04:56:11 AM
Oh yeah I have major daddy issues, I always start getting weirdly attracted to older men who give me fatherly attention.. it is so confusing, apparently they call that transference but it can feel so real... it's validating though bc I never had a normal relationship with my real dad. I never got to be his little princess or anything. good thing I am taken hahah otherwise I would probably want to seduce a bunch of married old men :/
Title: Re: Daddy Issues..
Post by: Hayley on February 25, 2014, 06:22:40 AM
I have quite a bit of daddy issues but I don't believe they are the reason I am trans. Yes I have issues with my father and my dad... And stepdad (long story on verbiage that I won't put out in public) but I had strong and amazing male role models in my life, grandfather and uncles. That being said it doesn't stop people(mother) from believing that is the reason for me being who I am.
Title: Re: Daddy Issues..
Post by: GnomeKid on February 26, 2014, 04:40:05 PM
I'm pleased to say that I do not.  My dad is pretty awesome.
Title: Re: Daddy Issues..
Post by: amZo on February 26, 2014, 04:43:00 PM
Personally, I think you should have mommy issues too.  :(
Title: Re: Daddy Issues..
Post by: mistressstevie on February 26, 2014, 11:07:22 PM
There is probably not any single element explaining  transexuality.  Humans are a remarkable diverse population with a wide variety of inputs to outcomes.  Understanding and personal acceptance will also vary for each.  This does make it an amazing trip to be enjoyed for the trek of discovery it is.   
Title: Re: Daddy Issues..
Post by: Polo on February 26, 2014, 11:20:05 PM
I've heard ( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Causes_of_transsexualism#Brain_structure (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Causes_of_transsexualism#Brain_structure) ) that transgender people have similar brain structures to their preferred gender, likely due to pre-birth development...

I'm not sure about Daddy issues, per se, but I did grow up without a father figure for most of my childhood, and it certainly did not have a feminizing effect on me  :P
Title: Re: Daddy Issues..
Post by: Michelle123 on February 28, 2014, 04:44:57 PM
I had a good father role model, didn't save me from being trans.  In fact, my Mom was not the best role model, so hard to say how much they are related.
Title: Re: Daddy Issues..
Post by: thevaliantx on March 02, 2014, 06:44:32 PM
My first cousin is a trans man (successfully transitioned years ago and is ALL MAN, lol!!).  I'm trans.  Both of our families had pretty much non-existent fathers.  My father, all he cared about was working and making a buck.  If anything got in the way of his career, or caused him to lose money (such as accidentally breaking something at home) he'd bring out the fists and pummel me.