Is it just me or you all out there?
It's that I feel very insecure in summer cos for example I can't conceal my adam's apple with a scarf in summer. It's weird to wear scarf in summer.
Furthermore in winter I wear a hood in morning to be less clockable and it works but in summer I can't do that.
I'm trying to rush as quick as possible to Thailand for my surgeries before we reach summer.
What about others out there, do you feel more insecure in summer?
The main issue I will have about summer is short sleeves revealing my upper arm & shoulder size. In winter I can bury them in a sweater. Ain't no way I'm wearing sleeveless anything.
I think I've gained enough weight over the years to not really have to worry about my Adam's Apple showing. :-\
I think it's the colder months that a little more bothersome for me. I no longer wear padded bras and I stopped using breast forms a year and a half ago, so the bulky clothes of winter are more likely to hide my meager nearly A-cup breasts. A cami with a shelf bra helps hold them up enough so that they're somewhat noticeable, so long as I'm not wearing a heavy sweater.
I don't feel any more vulnerable in the summer than I do in the winter. Don't tend to wear bulky clothes anyway. I'm relatively insecure all the time, but I mask it well irl.
Summers here are hot(!) and humid. My boobs are just getting perky enough to be noticeable. Which would probably be explainable if I were heavyset, but they look pretty odd/obvious on someone thin. So I'll be wearing a lot of short sleeve button down shirts instead of just t-shirts.
Yeah, I'm another who's the opposite... I feel like my most feminine traits are my long hair and big boobs, and bulky heavy winter clothing conceals all that and makes me look all blocky. It's bad enough that I feel too tall and yet like my legs are too short; layering on too many clothes just makes it look like I have zero curves.
(Of course, I have no visible Adam's apple and had GRS - though pre-op I thought it helped to have the top to distract from the bottom, too.)
Meh...I feel no different in the summer or winter. (Not in terms of gender this and that anyway). I just hate bitter winter cold and brutal summer heat.
The winter destroys my skin like sumtin crazy. Plus, I havent' had laser yet (but I will in two week; i only need one session) so the little bit of hair I have can freeze and be really noticeable on my face. Plus, My face is kinda andro but my body is really nice, soft and busty and winter tends to hide that. I have no adam's apple so that's no problem. Winter clothes suck and I hate them. But as soon as I hget laser I wont be apssing as a guy ever no matter what i do so, it's whatever now.
I often hate the way I look and feel like I'm being clocked no matter how I'm dressed. I just confuse people. Dressed in boy clothes, I often get referred to as a lady while out with my SO.......dressed up in my finest, I often feel that I'm being gendered in the opposite direction. Every laugh or snicker I hear, is aimed at me. But if I really pay attention, I usually find out it's completely unrelated, so I'm trying to deal with the whole background noise thing when I'm out......80% of it is probably in our heads :(
Quote from: ♡ Emily ♡ on March 13, 2014, 03:52:57 PM
Oh crap, it is 10 months today....
Congratulations :)
Summer is harder for sure. It's hard to hide things under a one piece bathing suit.
Just have fun & who cares.
Summer plus: I can show off my legs, which are one of my most feminine features.
Summer minus: I have to show off my hideous fatty arms, which are one of my most unfeminine features.
Still have some residual guy muscles and not ready for tank tops just yet. Maybe they'll melt away faster after the orchi?
The thing that I hate the most about summer is that I live in a very hot and humid place...
Can you say runny makeup? ...Waterproof never is as waterproof as it claims...
Everytime I look in the mirror, it's as if my face were melting. :-\
Hi.
Okay every one is different and that goes for us females as well. i dress in short's sandles tops with arms showing i'v nothing to hide i dress nicely of cause, yet im no different than other women and as for summer or winter i dont mind .
In answer to the ? of insecure or vulnerable , im a very strong woman very confident in myself and self assured to do what i have done over the last 20 years i'v had to be,
And to clocking thats nothing more than a laugh for me im looked at and i give mixed message's all the time in the main im seen and accepted as female just for some im seen as like a male in my facial features i dont mind . i know sunday just gone at a meeting a woman said to me your game to be dressed as a woman, = Edwardian dress wear 1900 -14, i said well i am a female she said oh sorry. ill bet she'll ask others now, my friends will tell her im a bit different still female though,
In the group she's a member i have friends there, ..... so next time ill be dressed again when we go there, I dont know wether you have lots of friends i do in all the groups im a member of and more beside, they know me so well so get involved with some groups you have interests in
...noeleena...
I can get away with dressing in summery clothes and fortunately don't have an apple as such to conceal. Not sure yet how I'll go in winter - as others have noted wearing bulky clothes for warmth might conceal what little shape I do have.
Quote from: Evolving Beauty on March 13, 2014, 02:52:11 PM
Is it just me or you all out there?
It's that I feel very insecure in summer cos for example I can't conceal my adam's apple with a scarf in summer. It's weird to wear scarf in summer.
Furthermore in winter I wear a hood in morning to be less clockable and it works but in summer I can't do that.
I'm trying to rush as quick as possible to Thailand for my surgeries before we reach summer.
What about others out there, do you feel more insecure in summer?
I DO wear scarves all summer. I have to. The area around my collarbone has tufts of male body hair that defies epilation and seems impossible to shave smoothly.
Quote from: KelsieJ on March 13, 2014, 08:45:43 PM
I just confuse people. Dressed in boy clothes, I often get referred to as a lady while out with my SO.......dressed up in my finest, I often feel that I'm being gendered in the opposite direction. Every laugh or snicker I hear, is aimed at me.
This is how it works for a MTF; being on hormones (for a long time) will emphasise your (newly) gained feminine traits by just wearing men's or androgyne clothes etc.
Whereas wearing your 'finest' feminine clothes etc will emphasise your masculine traits, which you're stuck with for life, such as a big head, a thick neck, broad shoulders, a big trunk, no waist, narrow hips, too thin, scragly = masculine legs, etcetc.
Dressing simply works the other way around for MTF....dress masculine or androgynously and you'll be read as female.
Dress very feminine and you'll be read as (a former) male.
It did that the first 2 years of transition for me. Like:
*SUMMER IS COMING*
But since I'm a pretty masculine lezzy I started to like being buff(I'm really not just bulkier) and I have very high self-confidence so I can rock pretty much anything I want.
Honestly I hate winter more because I don't like the bulky clothes feeling. I really do not like wearing boots to work and then changing into my office shoes once I am in the office. I love summer because I can wear more revealing clothes and with my BA have a little more to umm show off :)
Whee!!!! Summer!!! Tanktops and miniskirts. :) I'll be doing this for a lot of it:
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi144.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fr195%2Fmandonlym%2F6333_134378552663_2443046_n_zpsee7a9d4f.jpg&hash=5bb4cfa443c166282abc5867730c17b6b22e7979)
Napping in the park. Seriously though, in my years and years of experience, the major way people get clocked is when they're self-conscious and care too much about getting clocked. For the most part people don't notice other people on the street unless there's something to notice. And being self-conscious communicates that. Of course it's easier not to be self-conscious when we look and feel feminine, but over the years I've really let go of my masculine features and own what I have. Case in point:
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi144.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fr195%2Fmandonlym%2F20274_106794449332153_7868539_n_zps826b7c9b.jpg&hash=d5ce87b2f38befea34e92f6a3fcf4448291fc33d)
Notice the man shoulders? I was self-conscious when my ex posted this on Facebook but then I was like, those are my shoulders! I worked out to get them and I'm proud of them. :) Friends just think I did a lot of gymnastics growing up (which I kinda did so it's not too far from the truth).
It's your body. Look forward to the future but also own what you have as much as you can.
I am a little bit scared about the upcoming summer, because I think I am far from passable :( My androgenic alopecia is not yet fixed and my hairline is...well, obviously male :( My body is still somewhere in between - my breast are big enough so I cannot hide them in warm weather, but my fat is a lot and still in male pattern, which makes the picture not that pleasant... I hope until the summer comes, these problems to be solved somehow or I will be forced to stay at home like a prisoner...
Being in Miami, its always bloody summer. The only vulnerability I might have is going to the beach and sporting a swimsuit for the first time >_< and i love the beach so I don't know what I'm gonna do.. I don't like the idea of avoiding the beach for 6-12 straight months.
Other than that, I love summer because of summer dresses and short shorts xD
hmm I am actually looking for any excuse to drews more summery. I was uncomfortable in wintrr bc I needed a new wool coat but it was late in the season and i had no money. But yea I don't mind showing skin except my arms a little bit because I have some kerratosis on them and stretchhhhh marks :(
Ugg, I hate summers. I have to tough it out in "boy" mode one more time until I fully transition. In cold weather, I can wear coats and jackets and not bind the boobage.
I like both summer and winter
In early transition I liked winter... As it hid my more male features.. Now I look female.. So I can enjoy summer.
This summer coming.. Will be the first one as post op.. Can't wait to wear a bikini without wearing shorts over the bottom.
I love my body and I am not ashamed of it anymore... Summer I love wear short skirts and strapy tops..
Winter it pantyhose and high heel boots..
Early transition I wasn't too comfortable wearing the summer styles....I always seen something else in the mirror. It was nice when winter came and I could hide my ugly legs and muscles in arms. I now love summer and even wear a bikini a couple times a year....I wear tanks quite often and love to wear a summer dress every once in awhile....and love the knit mini's!!! Oh and I usually wear yoga pants all year but in summer will wear them more when out and about.
I'm still self conscious about my shoulders but I think its me more then reality...I know they don't slope like some women's....but many of the fit or thinner women I see also don't have sloped shoulders. Also all the tops I buy are small or even X-small...and they fit good but don't look overly tight.
About the only thing I like about dressing for winter are boots...luv luv!! and scarves. This winter though I am ready to retire the boots....its been such a long winter here!
This pic is my first summer FT...I was still very conscious of my body....especially my shoulders and ugly legs. It didn't help that I also had to wear a swim suit around a large water park with 1000's inspecting my appearance. This was also the first time I wore a dress in public....I actually bought it there and used it more for a cover up. I never viewed it as a dress....I later thought...geez this is a dress silly!!
Even though I was very self conscious of my appearance, I can look back at this and see that my shoulders were not that big. I am even smaller now...but have gained some belly fat. UGH!!!
Quote from: Dahlia on March 14, 2014, 06:00:09 AM
This is how it works for a MTF; being on hormones (for a long time) will emphasise your (newly) gained feminine traits by just wearing men's or androgyne clothes etc.
Whereas wearing your 'finest' feminine clothes etc will emphasise your masculine traits, which you're stuck with for life, such as a big head, a thick neck, broad shoulders, a big trunk, no waist, narrow hips, too thin, scragly = masculine legs, etcetc.
Dressing simply works the other way around for MTF....dress masculine or androgynously and you'll be read as female.
Dress very feminine and you'll be read as (a former) male.
Whiskey Tango Foxtrot? *facepalm* Oh noes, I purged the wrong wardrobe apparently. *facepalm again*
LOLZ! Too funny. It does make sense though.
It's kind of my strategy. Go for androgynous and only subtly feminine. For a host of reason, I can't go full girlie...
I tend to dress the way I want to dress... and no problems being misgendered since about six months into HRT. Mostly that *is* pretty feminine, although I admit I'm not sure I'll have the patience for flirty skirts this summer. :)
Quote from: Just Shelly on March 14, 2014, 01:39:54 PM
Even though I was very self conscious of my appearance, I can look back at this and see that my shoulders were not that big. I am even smaller now...but have gained some belly fat. UGH!!!
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi1229.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fee461%2Fshellydrae%2FDells6-20-1205855xxJPG.jpg&hash=d64415c1f785e3a7cb8bc314bc1f68751e09bf26)
That pic says to me "ex-college or Olympic female athlete mom", out of this context, I'd never even suspect and I am pretty good at "clocking".
Quote from: Dahlia on March 14, 2014, 06:00:09 AM
This is how it works for a MTF; being on hormones (for a long time) will emphasise your (newly) gained feminine traits by just wearing men's or androgyne clothes etc.
Whereas wearing your 'finest' feminine clothes etc will emphasise your masculine traits, which you're stuck with for life, such as a big head, a thick neck, broad shoulders, a big trunk, no waist, narrow hips, too thin, scragly = masculine legs, etcetc.
Dressing simply works the other way around for MTF....dress masculine or androgynously and you'll be read as female.
Dress very feminine and you'll be read as (a former) male.
I just discovered this fact. Went for a bike ride this morning. Didn't bother to get all dressed up and girly, so I dug up some boy clothes. And, well, HOLY CRAP! My body suddenly looked stupidly super girly.
Me I love summers because my body has always been very feminine. I have narrow shoulders, hips, long legs (my best feature), small oval face and a normal head size for a female of my height. I dress in a tank, short shorts, and sandals. Living in Florida we don't have real cold winters anyway but I stil dress feminine. I don't own any male clothes anyway. What little facial hair I have left is mostly gray so it doesn't show. My leg and arm hair is thinner than alot of cis girls I know. Actually I think my body shape is what has made it so easy for me to pass. Of course though I'm getting old and have noticed some cellulite on my upper thighs so I need shorts with at least a 4" inseam. Other than that I'm sleevless always in summertime although this year I'll have to start wearing bras because of my evolving breasts I didn't have last year, lol! :laugh: ;)
Quote from: Dahlia on March 14, 2014, 06:00:09 AM
This is how it works for a MTF; being on hormones (for a long time) will emphasise your (newly) gained feminine traits by just wearing men's or androgyne clothes etc.
Whereas wearing your 'finest' feminine clothes etc will emphasise your masculine traits, which you're stuck with for life, such as a big head, a thick neck, broad shoulders, a big trunk, no waist, narrow hips, too thin, scragly = masculine legs, etcetc.
Dressing simply works the other way around for MTF....dress masculine or androgynously and you'll be read as female.
Dress very feminine and you'll be read as (a former) male.
I hadn't made that connection before, but this makes perfect sense.
I wear Jeans no matter if it is 15 or 115.
I prefer summer over winter. But then again I got lucky body wise.
I live in Phoenix so it's pretty much short sleeves all year. I've been worried about it for a while.
If I can somehow manage my leg hair and lose some muscle on my arms I think I ll be fine...
In the winter, I have some turtlenecks I like. The added security of the covered apple is nice. I also have a pea coat which is nice because it has a small waist, and the bottom flairs out like a skirt.
As said earlier, skirts with leggings and boots are awesome!
In the summer, I've found that short sleeves will actually make my arms look bigger in some cases, while a cami will keep the shoulders relatively femanized, which is a nice surprise. Try one out! Find your color! Fat or thin, they're nice with a pushup bra underneath.
Quote from: WFane on March 21, 2014, 09:04:56 PM
In the winter, I have some turtlenecks I like. The added security of the covered apple is nice. I also have a pea coat which is nice because it has a small waist, and the bottom flairs out like a skirt.
As said earlier, skirts with leggings and boots are awesome!
In the summer, I've found that short sleeves will actually make my arms look bigger in some cases, while a cami will keep the shoulders relatively femanized, which is a nice surprise. Try one out! Find your color! Fat or thin, they're nice with a pushup bra underneath.
I love cami's and actually have several. I think they are a great alternative to my summer norm once in a while. I'm thin and now have breasts developing which will make this year more special and interesting. My narrow shoulders and my legs are my best features so anything that shows them off a little is a plus in my eyes.
I do feel much more insecure in the summer. My body shape is a dead giveaway. I can conceal my bodyshape with trench coats and jackets in the winter, but I can't do that in the summer.
I had a whole collection of gorgeous camis that I loved... and this past summer, I just couldn't wear them out without something over it anymore. No pushup bra needed; my breasts are already too big to wear them. It's a shame. I miss those things. (Still kept them as undershirts or at-home tops, but it's not the same.)
I'll just put it this way. If I 'am getting clocked, I don't care. It's the summer, I'am outside in the warm weather having fun.
Some of you brought up being self conscious makes you less passable. So when it gets warmer just focus on the season and live it. It's just something you look forward to half the year where I live, so I don't take warm weather for granted. Lol and if some peeps want to clock me, whatevs. I'am too busy enjoying the summer too care. ;D
Quote from: Marieee on March 21, 2014, 10:02:01 PM
I'll just put it this way. If I 'am getting clocked, I don't care. It's the summer, I'am outside in the warm weather having fun.
Some of you brought up being self conscious makes you less passable. So when it gets warmer just focus on the season and live it. It's just something you look forward to half the year where I live, so I don't take warm weather for granted. Lol and if some peeps want to clock me, whatevs. I'am too busy enjoying the summer too care. ;D
Very very veeeerry well said. Live your life as who you are and have fun this summer girls. Most of you know how to dress to show off your more feminine areas. This distracts the goo goo eyes from the not so femine ones, lol! :laugh: ;)
Very well said, Marieee!
I know what I look like, and I'd only be lying to myself if I thought I wasn't being clocked regularly. But I'll be damned if I'm gonna go through the rest of my life hating parts of me.
Quote from: Dahlia on March 14, 2014, 06:00:09 AM
Quote from: KelsieJ on March 13, 2014, 08:45:43 PM
I just confuse people. Dressed in boy clothes, I often get referred to as a lady while out with my SO.......dressed up in my finest, I often feel that I'm being gendered in the opposite direction. Every laugh or snicker I hear, is aimed at me.
This is how it works for a MTF; being on hormones (for a long time) will emphasise your (newly) gained feminine traits by just wearing men's or androgyne clothes etc.
Whereas wearing your 'finest' feminine clothes etc will emphasise your masculine traits, which you're stuck with for life, such as a big head, a thick neck, broad shoulders, a big trunk, no waist, narrow hips, too thin, scragly = masculine legs, etcetc.
Dressing simply works the other way around for MTF....dress masculine or androgynously and you'll be read as female.
Dress very feminine and you'll be read as (a former) male.
It probably depends a lot on the cut of the clothes. Most clothes are designed with a small woman in mind, and just expanded for the bigger sizes. So even many cis women look awkward in them. I looked pretty awkward in female cut shirts and (this doesn't have anything to do with the cut,) but skirts - I looked really awful with my huge muscular tree trunk legs. There's this pic at my sister's graduation... Ugh. Really awkward. But I think feminine stuff can still be pulled off, you just have to find stuff that flatters.
But also there's the fact that most women don't really seem to dress all that feminine most of the time. (Course that depends where you live.) Add that to the fact feminine clothes are designed to get attention, and you get scrutinized a lot more.
Quote from: FA on March 22, 2014, 10:47:42 AM
This is how it works for a MTF; being on hormones (for a long time) will emphasise your (newly) gained feminine traits by just wearing men's or androgyne clothes etc.
Whereas wearing your 'finest' feminine clothes etc will emphasise your masculine traits, which you're stuck with for life, such as a big head, a thick neck, broad shoulders, a big trunk, no waist, narrow hips, too thin, scragly = masculine legs, etcetc.
Dressing simply works the other way around for MTF....dress masculine or androgynously and you'll be read as female.
Dress very feminine and you'll be read as (a former) male.
It probably depends a lot on the cut of the clothes. Most clothes are designed with a small woman in mind, and just expanded for the bigger sizes. So even many cis women look awkward in them. I looked pretty awkward in female cut shirts and (this doesn't have anything to do with the cut,) but skirts - I looked really awful with my huge muscular tree trunk legs. There's this pic at my sister's graduation... Ugh. Really awkward. But I think feminine stuff can still be pulled off, you just have to find stuff that flatters.
But also there's the fact that most women don't really seem to dress all that feminine most of the time. (Course that depends where you live.) Add that to the fact feminine clothes are designed to get attention, and you get scrutinized a lot more.
Yeah I agree ... what Dahlia said just depends on the person, I think MTfs can dress femininely but they may not have had the experiences to learn about dressing for their figure yet. But every body can be emphasized tastefully in the right way to look feminine.. it's just kind of like being a curvier girl.
I enjoy both summer and winter, but I prefer summer, because I can expose my body as much as possible. A problem is that some people here do not like too much exposure of body, regardless of gender. Even nowadays, I wear miniskirt with thigh-high socks, but a few already commented that longer skirts would look better.
My only vulnerable trait is my low voice, but nowadays people do not seem to care about my voice or even about my gender.
barbie~~
I don't mind either season...but I couldn't wait for my first winter since going full time. For me, it was more about style than it was showing a figure. Getting to wear Uggy boots, leggings, cowl neck sweaters, long skirts with boots, fuzzy mittens, colorful Columbian coats...omg! I didn't care what it hid or showed....the point was that I could now wear all these great things. Winter used to be jeans and sneakers....day after day after day...all winter! But getting all warm and bundled up as a female was simply incredible! And still is for that matter! Sadly, it did cause me to store up some extra winter fat that needs to leave before summer arrives! LOL!
Yeah my major problem is how toned my arms are. I get asked if I body build. So embarrassing. So I can't wear sleeveless or strap anything. It makes summer shopping a bit of a pain
Nope. I feel I look much better not in bulky clothes :).
Quote from: sad panda on March 22, 2014, 12:39:17 PM
Yeah I agree ... what Dahlia said just depends on the person, I think MTfs can dress femininely but they may not have had the experiences to learn about dressing for their figure yet. But every body can be emphasized tastefully in the right way to look feminine.. it's just kind of like being a curvier girl.
It actually makes a lot of sense........ I'm very lucky that I have female bone structure below the neck - i don't have blocky shoulders, I actually have more of a defined waist than my cisgender SO and my feet are in the cisgender female size range and my hands are the same size as hers. My problem is that I'm just overall too bulky at 5'10..... I've gained 40lb through transitioning and giving up smoking. I'm finally starting to lose it but it's been a real struggle and I don't know if I'll ever get back to my ideal weight :(
What I think gets me clocked is my face, but I don't see the value in FFS because it just gets you a bit closer but it can't do miracles.
Quote from: KelsieJ on March 25, 2014, 03:06:31 AM
It actually makes a lot of sense........ I'm very lucky that I have female bone structure below the neck - i don't have blocky shoulders, I actually have more of a defined waist than my cisgender SO and my feet are in the cisgender female size range and my hands are the same size as hers. My problem is that I'm just overall too bulky at 5'10..... I've gained 40lb through transitioning and giving up smoking. I'm finally starting to lose it but it's been a real struggle and I don't know if I'll ever get back to my ideal weight :(
What I think gets me clocked is my face, but I don't see the value in FFS because it just gets you a bit closer but it can't do miracles.
Yah or even head size (and just overall body size too) is a big cue and FFS can't fix that. I think those 2 things are the reason it was impossible for people to clock me, cuz if your head and body are the size of a cis girl even looking sorta masculine wouldn't be a deal breaker. I have a slightly masc face just not big enough to confuse anyone as a girl, just looks modellesque, unfortunately it does look weird as a boy :/
Quote from: sad panda on March 25, 2014, 11:05:41 AM
Yah or even head size (and just overall body size too) is a big cue and FFS can't fix that. I think those 2 things are the reason it was impossible for people to clock me, cuz if your head and body are the size of a cis girl even looking sorta masculine wouldn't be a deal breaker. I have a slightly masc face just not big enough to confuse anyone as a girl, just looks modellesque, unfortunately it does look weird as a boy :/
Omg yes i resonate with this. I have such a large head and it really just makes me look terrible!!
Quote from: Sarah Anne on March 24, 2014, 11:25:56 AM
I don't mind either season...but I couldn't wait for my first winter since going full time. For me, it was more about style than it was showing a figure. Getting to wear Uggy boots, leggings, cowl neck sweaters, long skirts with boots, fuzzy mittens, colorful Columbian coats...omg! I didn't care what it hid or showed....the point was that I could now wear all these great things. Winter used to be jeans and sneakers....day after day after day...all winter! But getting all warm and bundled up as a female was simply incredible! And still is for that matter! Sadly, it did cause me to store up some extra winter fat that needs to leave before summer arrives! LOL!
OMG this is so so right!! Even though I don't like to wear all this bulky crap...at least I have fun coordinating and "trying" to be stylish!....and boots! don't get me started....I have 7 pairs but wear only 3 most times. I didn't have the money for Uggs so had to get a knock off....at least they looked good for most of the winter...they then went to sh** I would've made it all the way if winter would of been normal UGH!! it will be -2 degrees tonight...had a high of 19 today...yay!! :(
I still enjoy summer and showing off some of my figure....though after this winter it is a little more rounder :) well maybe curvy is the right word...ya sure I'll stick with that!!