Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Kia Ora,
As usual this kind of thread comes with a   :icon_poke: "TRIGGER WARNING" :icon_punch: ...Just to be on the safe side....

Susan's is a "support" site where people can find some form of support for all the different obstacles that might arise along the path to self discovery ...

However, sadly it would seem, some struggle before, during and after transition, even if they manage through the use of surgical means or have been blessed by Mother Nature to 'blend in'...dissatisfaction in one form or other seems to follow them like a shadow clings to form...

Understandably unresolved/on going clinical depression/ bi polar /anxiety/or a combination of mental and physical ailments can play a major part in this 'post transition' dissatisfaction...

However I just want to find out how many members have actually found the peace/gender contentment that they longed for now they are post transition ?

Edit: Are you comfortable with where you are now at gender-wise ?

Metta Anatta :)

I'm quite satisfied. My life turned out better than I could have anticipated.

No.  I'm going to see how the orchi goes before I make the call about installing the whole shebang.

I've found gender contentment, but not physical contentment.

Eventually I will be more complete. 

Kia Ora,

I think internalised transphobia (ITP) is a crushing mental ailment and one which for many is hard to get over-one is never satisfied...Add to this, when the 'normal' trials and tribulations of life tends to wind ones emotions up and their mind goes to work  seeking out all the faults and flaws (real and imaginary) of ones being...

If early in ones transition one is showing signs of ITP, it might pay to have some "preemptive" therapy which hopefully will provide the necessary tools to help cope further down/along the track....

Metta Anatta :)

Interesting question.

I was content before. I wanted to be a woman but knew that was quite impossible, so I was pretty content being a man.

I'm content now. I love being a woman - it's the way I'm meant to live.

Yet I'm having SRS in a couple months because my body is the wrong shape. I could be content with the wrong shaped body, but life is not about being content. Life is about experiences, and I do not want to finish mine without experiencing what it's like to be completely female-shaped.

Does any of that make sense?

I haven't really transitioned properly yet, but I'm actually surprisingly OK with my body as is. I need to go on testosterone, that's the thing I'm 100% certain on. Top surgery, I'd want to if I could be brave enough to go through surgery, but if I couldn't...I think I'd learn to be happy despite that. The things I feel the worst about are things that can be fixed/improved with testosterone. Everything else, yes I have my bad moments/days, but I'm very blessed to not feel as bad as others do about it, so I think I could find ways of being OK with the body I have. So I'm on my way, it's a work in progress even now.

Well yes and no as far as my day to day life goes I'm content and happy being a woman. But I know I'll never feel like a whole person until I have surgery. But thankfully that don't seem that far off now. :)

Not content yet, but things are much better since top surgery.
People who know me have commented on the difference in my demeanor. I still have some "issues" but a surprising amount of previously constant stress/anxiety is gone. I couldn't relax before. Hobbies weren't very enjoyable, they were mostly used to distract myself, and I tried to be constantly doing something to keep up that distraction. Now hobbies are consistently fun and I do them because I enjoy them. And, this is new, I can now sometimes sit and just do nothing and feel mostly ok. It's awesome to wake up in the morning and not dread getting out from under the blankets.

Trying to be cautiously optimistic, but I mostly expect life will be even better with time on T and, hopefully, metoidioplasty someday. That's new too, expecting life to get better.

I am content with the idea that I'm finally heading in the right direction. As for everything else I am not content. There are still a few milestones I'd like to go through before I think I would feel content with where I'm at but that's years down the road.

Nope.

It's definitely gotten better for me recently, but I still feel like I'm constantly fighting against my various masculine features and social tendencies, and I still don't feel like a "real" woman yet. I haven't reached the point yet where I can just go about my day, and not actively think about "passing" or worry about not being "female enough."

I've still got a ways to go. Still need my hair to finish growing, still need more curves, still need to lose weight, still need WAY more female social programming, and still need to find a clothing style that suits me.

Absolutely. I'm still not happy with my looks, mind you, but it's in the same way my cis female friends aren't - I don't look in the mirror and see a man anymore (except on rare REALLY bad days), just when I'm having a low self-esteem time I think I'm an ugly woman. But gender-wise, I'm entirely a woman and comfortable with that.

Interestingly, I got to that stage pre-op but post-transition... somewhere around 2 years after I started transitioning, I think, being trans stopped being a defining characteristic in my head. These days I don't even think about it much except during conversations in trans spaces. Bottom surgery was a blessing in erasing the *physical* dysphoria, but the gender discomfort had been 99% banished before that.

Quote from: suzifrommd on April 19, 2014, 05:03:04 PM
Interesting question.

I was content before. I wanted to be a woman but knew that was quite impossible, so I was pretty content being a man.

I'm content now. I love being a woman - it's the way I'm meant to live.

Yet I'm having SRS in a couple months because my body is the wrong shape. I could be content with the wrong shaped body, but life is not about being content. Life is about experiences, and I do not want to finish mine without experiencing what it's like to be completely female-shaped.

Does any of that make sense?

Yes.  And what a perfect way to describe exactly what I'm feeling too.

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FRbRSPn6.jpg&hash=c6723471927dee5def621b4678f3e27390eb486f)

You tell me?

Quote from: Carrie Liz on April 20, 2014, 02:23:50 PM
It's definitely gotten better for me recently, but I still feel like I'm constantly fighting against my various masculine features and social tendencies, and I still don't feel like a "real" woman yet. I haven't reached the point yet where I can just go about my day, and not actively think about "passing" or worry about not being "female enough."

I've still got a ways to go.

I am a work in progress, still in transition, still incomplete, but always getting better it seems.  Thanks Carrie you have described where I am pretty well.
Julie

I'm satisfied with being a guy who likes to dress as a woman.  I'm glad I dealt with my gender identity issues because now I have a clear mind and some potential for interesting options in life.

Nope, living as a girl doesn't make me any happier overall.  :-\

I feel way worse about gender than I ever did even though i fit in more than i ever did.

I would say that i am very comfortable in most ways. Im lucky enough to be very passable where most people do not know i'm trans(probably due to the fact that i transitioned at 17) however, i am still very uncomfortable with whats 'in my pants'. I cannot wait until the day srs becomes a possibility for me.

Quote from: JessicaElle on April 23, 2014, 08:37:28 PM
I would say that i am very comfortable in most ways. Im lucky enough to be very passable where most people do not know i'm trans(probably due to the fact that i transitioned at 17) however, i am still very uncomfortable with whats 'in my pants'. I cannot wait until the day srs becomes a possibility for me.

Same regarding the passing situation and bottom dysphoria. At times its whatever but I still have my moments and can't wait till I have surgery too. Thankfully though being full time makes things much easier to deal with the fact I'm still pre-op. Life would be grand if I just had surgery. My paranoia would be no more if had my vagina already. I'm so scared of airport security and traveling just cause of this dyspohria idk it really sucks cause I love traveling!

Quote from: kelly_aus on April 23, 2014, 01:59:15 AM
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FRbRSPn6.jpg&hash=c6723471927dee5def621b4678f3e27390eb486f)

You tell me?

That's a beautiful picture! Seeing it actually made me smile, because you seem so genuinely pleased there.  :)