Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Transsexual talk => Male to female transsexual talk (MTF) => Topic started by: Shawn Sunshine on July 02, 2014, 09:11:43 AM

Title: One foot on the dark side of the force! It feels so strange!
Post by: Shawn Sunshine on July 02, 2014, 09:11:43 AM
Good morning.  :angel: Day 1 of my hrt regimine. I believe I have just taken my first step on a walk in the valley of the dark side of the force. My nurse practitioner at Lyon Martin Just prescribed me Spiro, the fire breathing dragon. She wants to start me off slowly and steadily.  Because I'm bipolar she wants to wait until I have a good mood medication before we start the other Bigger E cookie. But to be honest even after having this one oatmeal cookie, I feel a strange sense of calm. I had what you might describe.. is a slight euphoria last night after taking it, about 2 hours after. In fact the whole night and now this morning it feels as if I had taken maybe like 7 chammomille teas. No other changes to report at the moment. I'm going to be on the low end of Spiro's tail, At least for a couple weeks until they change it. But yea me! I feel just a certain kind of niceness and I don't think I've ever experienced it before.
Title: Re: I have one foot on the dark side of the force! It feels so good!
Post by: Miyuki on July 02, 2014, 09:43:27 AM
That's great news! ;D I still remember the first time I took spiro, how I immediately started to feel better, and all doubt was erased that I was doing the right thing. It's a pretty incredible feeling, so be sure to enjoy it. ;)
Title: Re: I have one foot on the dark side of the force! It feels so good!
Post by: JulieBlair on July 02, 2014, 10:17:50 AM
Well that is a big step!  As you begin to look how you authentically are the world becomes magical, which does indeed seem an apt metaphor.  Be patient, it takes a long time to go through puberty.  I'll hit the two year mark in thirty days, and change still continues be raise its smiling head.

Congratulations,
Julie
Title: Re: I have one foot on the dark side of the force! It feels so good!
Post by: Shawn Sunshine on July 02, 2014, 10:55:14 AM
Thank you. It had been a total of fouryears wrestling with this spiritualy and mentally...whether I wanted to transition or not. And I am 42 now.
Title: Re: I have one foot on the dark side of the force! It feels so good!
Post by: JulieBlair on July 02, 2014, 11:15:46 AM
Well, you got there seventeen years before me.  It takes as long as it takes to find the courage discard one life in favor of another that may bring happyness into the darkness.  I am just grateful that I get the great privilege to not only joyfully be myself in all aspects of my life, but that I get to be helpful too.   :D

I'm cheesy, but happy.  Who knows maybe authenticity will become your feel good medication.

j
Title: Re: I have one foot on the dark side of the force! It feels so good!
Post by: Rachel on July 02, 2014, 06:43:14 PM
Congratulations and welcome to the dark side.
Title: Re: I have one foot on the dark side of the force! It feels so good!
Post by: Shawn Sunshine on July 03, 2014, 05:44:45 AM
Where are my cookies from the emporerer? Or does that come later? In a another note.....I felt extra horny today....I can feel my testosterone surging. Guessing this is a normal reaction? I hope.it goes away soon.
Title: Re: I have one foot on the dark side of the force! It feels so good!
Post by: Shawn Sunshine on July 03, 2014, 05:51:55 AM
Quote from: Miyuki on July 02, 2014, 09:43:27 AM
That's great news! ;D I still remember the first time I took spiro, how I immediately started to feel better, and all doubt was erased that I was doing the right thing. It's a pretty incredible feeling, so be sure to enjoy it. ;)
well I feel tense now I can totally tell my T level is trying to reassert itself. How long will this last now?
Title: Re: One foot on the dark side of the force! It feels so strange!
Post by: Miyuki on July 03, 2014, 05:58:19 AM
And I happened to be looking at this thread the exact moment you posted. :D I'm not sure to be honest. My T levels were always on the low side, and once I started taking anti-androgens they didn't put up much of a fight. I never experienced any sort of testosterone surge when I first took spiro, but I wouldn't think it would last very long before your body gave in to the inevitable. Maybe something like a few weeks?
Title: Re: One foot on the dark side of the force! It feels so strange!
Post by: JulieBlair on July 03, 2014, 09:05:34 AM
For me it took six months for my T levels to recede to background levels.  I think your reaction is more psychological than physical.  That said your guy parts will stop working soon enough and your libido will ride off into the sunset for a while.  It is funny but I just woke up one morning a few months on and knew that the testosterone poisoning was finished.  It was that abrupt.  Of course by then if I bumped my nipples it nearly knocked me over in pain.  Your body will tell you, yell at you actually, that it is changing.  It is amazing and wonderful.  :)

j
Title: Re: One foot on the dark side of the force! It feels so strange!
Post by: Miyuki on July 03, 2014, 09:44:20 AM
Quote from: JulieBlair on July 03, 2014, 09:05:34 AM
For me it took six months for my T levels to recede to background levels.

Really, that long? I must've been lucky then. My levels were on the low end of normal to start out with (275 ng/dL). I never was properly tested again while on spiro before switching to Androcur, but it felt like spiro reduced my T levels almost immediately. And a few weeks after I switched to Androcur, I was tested, and my levels were within the normal female range.
Title: Re: One foot on the dark side of the force! It feels so strange!
Post by: Newgirl Dani on July 03, 2014, 09:51:40 AM
Quote from: JulieBlair on July 03, 2014, 09:05:34 AM
For me it took six months for my T levels to recede to background levels.  I think your reaction is more psychological than physical.  That said your guy parts will stop working soon enough and your libido will ride off into the sunset for a while.  It is funny but I just woke up one morning a few months on and knew that the testosterone poisoning was finished.  It was that abrupt.  Of course by then if I bumped my nipples it nearly knocked me over in pain.  Your body will tell you, yell at you actually, that it is changing.  It is amazing and wonderful.  :)

j

Jeez thanks Julie!!!  When I started to read this I was thinking "what is wrong with me "  I am on day 8 of Estradiol Valerate and Spiro (both med to low dose) and have not felt a thing.  At age 63 (almost) my T level is still in the 700's so I am now understanding the war has just begun and those T guys are just putting up their last stand  :)  I will knock them down.   Dani     and to Shawn Sunshine, way to go, your path has started, and cool name by the way.
Title: Re: One foot on the dark side of the force! It feels so strange!
Post by: Shawn Sunshine on July 03, 2014, 10:07:02 AM
HI Dani gratz on your journey too.  Today is better. I had like a surge of stiffness and sexual thoughts for a good four hours off and on during sleep. I feel a bit more calm this morning. I actually have low testosterone too as part of my intersex condition.  Mine was 195-220 on avetage
Title: Re: One foot on the dark side of the force! It feels so strange!
Post by: Newgirl Dani on July 03, 2014, 11:59:17 AM
Quote from: Shawn Sunshine on July 03, 2014, 10:07:02 AM
HI Dani gratz on your journey too.  Today is better. I had like a surge of stiffness and sexual thoughts for a good four hours off and on during sleep. I feel a bit more calm this morning. I actually have low testosterone too as part of my intersex condition.  Mine was 195-220 on avetage

Wow, my T levels still have to drop over 500 to even get down to your average!  Well I will just keep on adding reinforcements against that T army.   :)  That calm you speak of sounds like a welcome place to be, I'm still in hyper T-drive.
Title: Re: One foot on the dark side of the force! It feels so strange!
Post by: Shawn Sunshine on July 03, 2014, 12:07:48 PM
I'm in hyper t drive again now. That is also due to my landlord being very crabby and rude to me this morning. Need to go meditate Lol.
Title: Re: One foot on the dark side of the force! It feels so strange!
Post by: Newgirl Dani on July 03, 2014, 12:16:11 PM
Quote from: Shawn Sunshine on July 03, 2014, 12:07:48 PM
I'm in hyper t drive again now. That is also due to my landlord being very crabby and rude to me this morning. Need to go meditate Lol.

My best.  Dani
Title: Re: One foot on the dark side of the force! It feels so strange!
Post by: Shawn Sunshine on July 03, 2014, 05:04:27 PM
Hmm my testes hurt a little. Is that also normal? I take my third spiro tonight.
Title: Re: One foot on the dark side of the force! It feels so strange!
Post by: Eris on July 03, 2014, 05:09:43 PM
I read your first post and felt compelled to post this  :laugh:

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Ffc05.deviantart.net%2Ffs70%2Fi%2F2013%2F233%2Fa%2F4%2Fcome_over_to_the_dark_side_____by_shiniez-d6j3oi2.jpg&hash=1a50a63f13845de55895cacdd8de45219ca87475)
Title: Re: One foot on the dark side of the force! It feels so strange!
Post by: Shawn Sunshine on July 03, 2014, 05:32:51 PM
Yay! Can I haz themagical staff too?
Title: Re: One foot on the dark side of the force! It feels so strange!
Post by: AnneB on July 03, 2014, 06:10:49 PM
wiat, aren't you trying to get rid of that magical staff?  That's why yer on the Spiro, am I right?  ;)