I was just thinking about how I figured out that transgender was a real thing, and realized that the same thing that helped me find out that I wasn't just insane, also caused me to stop going to church.
So yeah, my parents and younger brothers recently converted to Catholicism, and my older brother recently announced that he considers himself an Atheist or something like that. But my parents are constantly asking me why I don't go to church anymore, even though at least my mom has said she would accept whatever I choose to do with my religion.
The reason I stopped is a bit complicated I think. It actually started when the Lutheran church my family used to go to started to get weird and we left it due to the pastor being apathetic to the members of the church.. also everyone was dying from cancer. Then we started going to a Catholic church about an hour away from my house, and that was kind of nice, but around that time we hosted 2 Chinese students, and my transgender feelings started again for the first time in about 2 years(at the time), we ended up not continuing with that church after I kind of had a mental break down thing in our car outside of the Catholic youth group.
Then my family decided to start going to a local Baptist church, and my and my younger brother started going to their youth group. This was the first time I actually listened in church, but almost exactly a year ago, the youth minister and her father caught the group completely off guard with a discussion about LGBT, no warning, and didn't even tell our parents. Thanks to an awesome girl there, I developed my own opinion on LGBT, then a month or so later found out that what I had been feeling for most of my life, was called being a transgender.
Sadly, I think that the same discussion has kind of pushed me away from any sort of organized religion for the time being, but I think I am finally ready to tell my parents why I refuse to go to any church at this moment. I also hope this will help me ask my mom if I can start seeing a therapist.
Sorry for the long post, but it feels awesome to actually get these feelings out for the first time in almost a year... Also I am wondering how other Christians here are handling their transition? I kind of have come up with the idea that God obviously put the whole LGBT community here for a reason, and even if it really is the devil trying to trick everyone, God will use it for good in the end.
I was a long time member of the Southern Baptist church (raised hardcore Roman Catholic). When I came out they dropped me fast and now the convention signed the resolution against us. I was praised highly as a male doing tornado relief last May-August. I unloaded trucks, transported supplies and other jobs all day for free. I still have a firm faith in G-D, just not hypocritical man anymore. I continue to study at home, but there are times I miss going such as major holidays like Christmas. :)
I found a church that accepts me as I am and welcomes me. This church is called metropolitan community church and is often simply referred to by its initials MCC. It was started by Troy Perry in L.A. quite a few years ago and has grown nationwide. Many MCCs are TLGB friendly since Troy is gay, but not all are. I am one of about 5 transgender members at my church; most everyone else is gay. I love my gay brothers and sisters that worship with me.
My transition has turned out to be far more spiritual than I ever imagined and the many friends I've made at my new church have really helped me travel the road I'm on.
Church is really more a social institution than a religious one, after all whatever you believe is still what you believe no matter what building you are in. I had the expierence of going to many different churches when I was younger (my step grandfather was a catholic minister) and it didn't make me Christian, but the social community aspects of it weren't lost on me. Whatever you feel your personal connection with. God is has to be more important than someone else's interpretation of divinity anyway.
Still there are loving and accepting churches, and having that sense of community could be nice for you, which is something perhaps you could check out.
Hmm... I was just thinking about it again this morning, and then found out that there is indeed one church in my area that is a bit more accepting of these things it seems, mostly because the minister is really young.
I don't think my family would be very happy if I started going to that church, and I would feel a bit uncomfortable due to some comments they made about Lutherans, but they do have a nice youth group I have heard. Advantage of going there is I already know a few teens that go to the youth group, and one of them is the only friend that knows I have issues with my gender identity.
Also it is really the only church in my area that isn't filled with drama right now.
I understand how you feel, Avinia. I had many people voice the same thing to me. Sounds like some time in the future that you would like to start attending again. I attend a church which is affirming and accepting of all genders. I came out to the congregation as transgender two years ago. I have been received with open arms and support.
:)
If this is a contest for not going to a church except for weddings or death, I have NOT been to church since I was 12. I'm 71 now. Religiously I'm a Deist. I believe in the existence of God. I just don't believe in any of the organized religions.
Okay, I was going to go to church this week, but I just decided I should probably stay away for a bit longer... Just found out one of my favorite Christian rappers decided to sue Katy Perry for "stealing" a beat from a song made in 2008.. and accuse her of being a witch...
I am going to take a break from church for a few more months.. now time to go laugh some more...
I'm Catholic and I haven't been to church since December. I struggle a lot in my faith, sometimes turning away from it, but I do believe in God. My depression is just really horrible and I've suffered from that since I was a kid. I have reconciled my gender identity and sexual orientation with my religion, though. It's just so difficult to get to Mass since the church is on the other side of the city and I just don't feel motivated to...do much of anything. :/
I haven't gone to church for a long time, either. I think about 5 years. The social construct is for a programmed approach, not organic. When I realized that church really happens outside of church...when we had friends over for dinner and the Holy Spirit broke out among us several times, the box-church experience was suddenly open to our eyes, and we didn't like what we saw. Interestingly, even in non-denoms.
If you find a good church, stick with it. They are out there.
If not, worshipping Him at home and through our daily lives is part & parcel of believing in him and placing Him first. Which is what I have chosen. And I agree with Jessica, we do miss those special church functions too.
I used to go to church every week, and really got a lot from it.. I love that feeling when you walk out at the end of a good message and service, you just feel like your mind is refreshed and the coming week seems easier.. But I haven't gone to church in a few years since we moved here..? I guess I've gotten synical, but I'm so afraid the local churches here are anti- LGBT, and especially marriage equality, I just don't know how to justify attending a place of worship that believes that.? I don't believe in those old traditional teachings, I know that everything man touches becomes corrupt, according to the bible, and it has been translated so many times, and words added and changed, I just don't know what to believe anymore.?
I really envy you here that have found good churches, or are trying different ones, I wish we had more choices here, but its quite rural, except cities 1+ hour away.. Still hoping though, and praying...
I was raised Catholic but never got confirmed, leaving the RCC in 1984, long before understanding my gender identity or romantic and sexual orientations.
In 1988, I joined a United Church of Christ church, the Congregational Church of San Mateo. I'd attend off and on between then and 2011, when my transition really started. It was then that I actually found I have a church home. I rejoined that church in 2012 with my chosen name, and was baptised there in November 2013, making my chosen name my Christian name.
As I type this, I'm sitting in the dining hall at the Pacific School of Religion, where I am a seminarian working toward my Master's of Divinity so that I may eventually be ordained.
For me, coming out led me back to church. But my church is a very welcoming. Having two out-of-the-closet lesbian pastors there really helped, too.