I've been told over and over that once I settle into HRT, I'll be able to tell whether hormones are "right" for me or not, as if the hormones will be some kind of definite answer as to whether transitioning is the "right" path for me to take. (I'm still unsure how far I want to go, but this is the next step that I want to take; therapist and endocrinologist agree.) Trouble is, I'm not sure what I'm supposed to be looking for. Is it just a miraculous "this is right!" kind of feeling or are there some concrete indicators (less dysphoria, less depression, liking the feeling of having a different face, softer skin etc.)?
And perhaps the more important question is: how can I tell whether the hormones are "wrong"? Has anyone gotten on HRT for a while and quit because they felt worse than before or known that it was just a step too far?
I see a slippery slope in my immediate future...(yay?)
slippery slope, for me yes. I am so glad I started HRT and I was afraid for so long. Now I can not remember why I was afraid. I wanted just spiro then spiro and low does E. Well I asked for (moment of truth) full hrt. I asked my therapist at the time if she thought I would come off hrt after I started. She said give it 4 months and she did not think I would come off hrt. 6 weeks in and I knew there was no going back.
You will know if it is right for you. Your brain will be receiving the correct hormones and it is wonderful. It takes a few days to start and then slowly you will notice things start to change. There is a long list of things that are improved such as:
Dysphoria
colors
no odor
can smell much better, especially guys
mental focus
confidence
physical things like joints
skin
hair
boobs
happy
being able to sleep
I was told progesterone would not do anything but increase my bust. Well that too had some great effects such mood and happiness and reduced depression.
If it is not right for you then, I was told, negative effects increase.
I found all effects of HRT very subtle.
For me, the most gendered effect was a gradual emotional shift into being comfortable with a nurturing and accepting stance. I no longer felt like I had to "react" to everything. I found myself judging things and people less and wanting to support them more.
This felt very much like I wanted myself to feel. If I'd been an alpha male, I doubt I would have tolerated this, for example.
I'm not sure I quite believe the stories of the person who declares "this is awful" in response to hormones. The effects are really muted.
Quote from: suzifrommd on July 15, 2014, 08:27:22 PM
I found all effects of HRT very subtle.
For me, the most gendered effect was a gradual emotional shift into being comfortable with a nurturing and accepting stance. I no longer felt like I had to "react" to everything. I found myself judging things and people less and wanting to support them more.
This felt very much like I wanted myself to feel. If I'd been an alpha male, I doubt I would have tolerated this, for example.
I'm not sure I quite believe the stories of the person who declares "this is awful" in response to hormones. The effects are really muted.
I agree with Suzi. It is the emotional shift that was most noticed by me and what i was expecting with HRT.
Each will feel there own. Whats are the expectations?
Izzy
Quote from: Cynthia Michelle on July 15, 2014, 07:32:23 PM
slippery slope, for me yes. I am so glad I started HRT and I was afraid for so long. Now I can not remember why I was afraid. I wanted just spiro then spiro and low does E. Well I asked for (moment of truth) full hrt. I asked my therapist at the time if she thought I would come off hrt after I started. She said give it 4 months and she did not think I would come off hrt. 6 weeks in and I knew there was no going back.
You will know if it is right for you. Your brain will be receiving the correct hormones and it is wonderful. It takes a few days to start and then slowly you will notice things start to change. There is a long list of things that are improved such as:
Dysphoria
colors
no odor
can smell much better, especially guys
mental focus
confidence
physical things like joints
skin
hair
boobs
happy
being able to sleep
I was told progesterone would not do anything but increase my bust. Well that too had some great effects such mood and happiness and reduced depression.
If it is not right for you then, I was told, negative effects increase.
YEP!! that all rings true for me as well. The biggest change other than the mental stuff was how my physical pains that I had for so many years went away almost instantly the week I started hrt.
My first hit of spiro was marvelous.
Though I didn't really notice the E at first.
You'll know if they're compatible with you. Just be open and honest with yourself about how you feel as you experience it. HRT is a big deal step, but given how much I was like, "OH YEAH!" with the spiro, if you're not meant for it I'm confident you'll have an equal, and opposite, "OH NO!"
My personal thoughts:
The "immediate" effect after the first dose can be the placebo effect. You're finally on your way and doing something. Yay!
After a few weeks, the subtle changes start occurring. You might feel more emotional, less turmoil, etc etc. Some of the physical changes may start happening - softer skin, nipple soreness, libido may change, and sexual function as well.
At this point, you'll get an idea whether things are right. You'll either hate it, are happy enough to want no more changes, or you want to go all the way.
My therapist told me that if HRT was right for me I would have a positive reaction to HRT within 48 hours. When I actually started this was definitely true.
I then stopped after 4 days and had a terrible bout of depression... And felt slightly worse than usual until I restarted HRT after I finished with the sperm bank.
If HRT is wrong for you, my therapist said that panic attacks and other dysphoric feelings will clearly manifest within 48 hours. She talked about trials where cis-males were given estrogen to try and reduce some type of cancer, but it made them so psychologically unstable that it wasn't worth it.
Edit:
Just because horomes are right physiologically doesn't mean that transition is 100% right for someone.
Some people just aren't ready mentally or socially for the changes despite being physiologically trans*.
On of my therapists MTF patients just couldn't handle the fact that he was growing breasts so he stopped transitioning even though it was physiologically right. Another patient stopped because of family/social situation.
I was on low dose HRT for about 4 years and noticed a calming effect and a lessening of dysphoria. After 4 years the dysphoria came back so I started therapy and eventually accepted that I am a transsexual. I started taking a much higher dose of HRT.
It took about a month for me to feel anything and then suddenly WOW!! It was like someone flipped a switch in my head from morose, depressed, and sad to happy. That's when I knew that HRT was right for me.
Starting estrogen seriously kicked off a reaction in my brain of "Oh my God, what have I been missing my whole life?" (I started anti-androgens 3 days earlier, but they didn't really do much but make me feel a bit calmer.)
But seriously, estrogen was like a shot of dynamite to my brain. I don't know if anyone else gets this kind of reaction, but that first day, it was as significant as a switch being turned from "off" to "on" in my mind. After an entire adult life of feeling like my brain was stuck in this constant state of "dull grey drear" as I called it, suddenly I could feel pleasure again! Food tasted better, music "hit" me emotionally, I actually started having real emotions again, true happiness and true sadness and elation and depression instead of just a constant state of "meh" where I felt emotionally brain-dead. That might or might not have been the placebo effect, but whatever.
Over time, my sex-drive dropped, I started feeling calmer (but also more emotional, so I had both elation and freakouts,) and most importantly, I stopped feeling angry and tense and defensive all the time. It felt like my brain was taking one giant sigh and going "ahhhhh....." I just knew that it was right, that this was how I'd always wanted my mind to work.
The real test is when the physical changes start happening, though. When my skin first started softening a bit 2 weeks in, I was rubbing the back of my hand across my face all day because it just felt so good. The day that I finally saw a girl looking back at me in the mirror was seriously one of the happiest days of my life. Every single one of the changes, every single bit of feminization, just made me smile so much, and love myself for having that body feature so much.
Again... you'll be able to tell. If the physical changes and emotional changes make you feel more like your mind and body are "working" right, then yeah.
I still have some troubles with the public side of transition. Dealing with the perceived judgments of other people and dealing with clocking paranoia is a real pain in the rear end. But I knew pretty much within the first week of being on HRT that I was never going to be able to go back. Because even though I was able to tolerate testosterone for many years, my brain just never felt "right" on it. Where E made it finally feel like I was myself again. Everything just "clicked."
see, I find this hard to answer because HRT has been right for me so I wouldn't know what the effects would be like if it was not right. All I can say is that having been subject to testosterone most of my adult life, that always felt like it was wrong for me. So I guess you will know one way or the other. If it is wrong it'll become evident within a short while.
Thank you all so much for sharing your experiences. Very helpful!
Quote from: mind is quiet now on July 15, 2014, 09:14:55 PMWhat are the expectations?
My expectations from low dose HRT are that I can finally put the thoughts about gender to the back of my mind and that the physical feeling of anxiety and unease diminishes. At this point, I really just want to feel normal; physical changes are not too important to me right now. Once the mental side is cleared up and I have a bit of breathing room, I'll reassess what the next stage might be.
So far, no dynamite or lights switching on. It's early days though. If anything, the effects have been more negative than positive (feeling depressed, not happy, but this could just be an unrelated mood swing), and with any new drug, especially as one as powerful as estrogen, I'm a little cautious about trying to recognize the warning signs that something is going wrong. Going into this process rather fragile to begin with, I am a touch concerned that things could go from bad to worse faster than I can recognize. Hopefully that won't happen, but I want to tread carefully. :)
I'm not that far in, but for what my experience is worth...
I got the immediate emotional calm that people have mentioned. I also started being more in touch with my emotions, and I've become much more open with people and communicate so much more freely. I don't know whether this is the effects of HRT or a treating willingness to be my natural self, but all of these changes are coincident with starting hormones.
I think the physical changes could come as quite a shock too, though. When your undercarriage starts shrinking and stocks 'putting out' the stuff it used to, and when you start growing breasts, and think these things would freak out anyone who isn't transgender. Still being part time these changes are making my work life increasingly 'difficult', but I absolutely love how my body is slowly beginning to fit to my mental image of myself.
Quote from: xponentialshift on July 15, 2014, 11:37:45 PM
If HRT is wrong for you, my therapist said that panic attacks and other dysphoric feelings will clearly manifest within 48 hours. She talked about trials where cis-males were given estrogen to try and reduce some type of cancer, but it made them so psychologically unstable that it wasn't worth it.
Interesting because I've come across several studies where hundreds of prostate cancer patients were given high doses of estrogen only, by injection or patch for several months to years. So, must not be every man that reacts that way, otherwise this treatment would have been discontinued a long time ago. And this sort of treatment where only estrogen is given for prostate cancer has been going on for at least since the 1960's, from what I gather where in the past estrogen was given orally and the type of estrogen was not bio-identical but instead DES (Diethylstilbestrol). Thousands of men were treated this way.
Quote from: xponentialshiftJust because horomes are right physiologically doesn't mean that transition is 100% right for someone.
Some people just aren't ready mentally or socially for the changes despite being physiologically trans*.
On of my therapists MTF patients just couldn't handle the fact that he was growing breasts so he stopped transitioning even though it was physiologically right. Another patient stopped because of family/social situation.
Indeed. VERY true. Good point. ;)
Quick update - today was a good day. Feeling 100% great, almost euphoric this morning, my skin kinda tingles a little, occasional waves of sheer pleasure for no reason whatsoever. :)
Without incriminating myself, it feels a little like the rush of an illicit chemical. If I knew what that was, I mean, because, er, I've never done anything like that before. >:-)
Quote from: KayXo on July 16, 2014, 10:44:39 AM
Interesting because I've come across several studies where hundreds of prostate cancer patients were given high doses of estrogen only, by injection or patch for several months to years. So, must not be every man that reacts that way, otherwise this treatment would have been discontinued a long time ago. And this sort of treatment where only estrogen is given for prostate cancer has been going on for at least since the 1960's, from what I gather where in the past estrogen was given orally and the type of estrogen was not bio-identical but instead DES (Diethylstilbestrol). Thousands of men were treated this way.
This is not so often done these days. Androgen deprivation therapy is now usually achieved by other means and is usually a last resort for prostate cancer.
And if you think about it -for a normal natal male - if it's your life on the line or growing breasts, which one would you choose? People will tolerate a lot in many cases if it means they get to live, so the side effects of cross hormone therapy in these cases is better tolerated.
Quote from: Brenda E on July 16, 2014, 09:08:09 PM
Without incriminating myself, it feels a little like the rush of an illicit chemical. If I knew what that was, I mean, because, er, I've never done anything like that before. >:-)
Hahaha! Someone has been taking something starting with the letter E... :P
Glad to hear that things are getting better.
Quote from: Brenda E on July 16, 2014, 09:08:09 PM
Quick update - today was a good day. Feeling 100% great, almost euphoric this morning, my skin kinda tingles a little, occasional waves of sheer pleasure for no reason whatsoever. :)
Without incriminating myself, it feels a little like the rush of an illicit chemical. If I knew what that was, I mean, because, er, I've never done anything like that before. >:-)
I've been on e patches for a few days and that's how I feel. If it stays this good I don't ever want to take them off ;)
Quote from: Brenda E on July 15, 2014, 07:04:14 PM
Is it just a miraculous "this is right!" kind of feeling or are there some concrete indicators (less dysphoria, less depression, liking the feeling of having a different face, softer skin etc.)?
And perhaps the more important question is: how can I tell whether the hormones are "wrong"? Has anyone gotten on HRT for a while and quit because they felt worse than before or known that it was just a step too far?
I see a slippery slope in my immediate future...(yay?)
Brenda
Yes to all of the posts above. The only thing I would add is that my GD shut down, it completely shut down when I started HRT..
In terms of negative effects - the only one I experienced is that the physical changes moved more quickly and were more pronounced than I was ready for. In hindsight if I was a little lighter and had stayed on lower dose hrt longer, I think that I would have felt more comfortable, but there again it could be because I am non binary and desire a more androgynous physical outcome together with the end of my GD and all of the other HRT benefits (skin, hair, emotional richness, more acute senses, peace, greater connection etc).
Safe travels
Aisla
Quote from: Aisla on July 17, 2014, 03:27:41 AMThe only thing I would add is that my GD shut down, it completely shut down when I started HRT.
That's what I'm afraid of. It's started to happen already, and I find myself now thinking, "Oh good, the dysphoria has gone away. Maybe that means I'm not trans after all and it was just a phase, and oh my god what on earth am I doing transitioning when I'm not even trans...I must be making the worst mistake of my life..."
Quote from: Brenda E on July 17, 2014, 07:00:04 AM
That's what I'm afraid of. It's started to happen already, and I find myself now thinking, "Oh good, the dysphoria has gone away. Maybe that means I'm not trans after all and it was just a phase, and oh my god what on earth am I doing transitioning when I'm not even trans...I must be making the worst mistake of my life..."
Brenda
Don't worry. From experience if you stop HRT, the dysphoria comes right back, seemingly stronger than ever. I had the same thoughts as you!
Aisla
Quote from: Brenda E on July 17, 2014, 07:00:04 AM
That's what I'm afraid of. It's started to happen already, and I find myself now thinking, "Oh good, the dysphoria has gone away. Maybe that means I'm not trans after all and it was just a phase, and oh my god what on earth am I doing transitioning when I'm not even trans...I must be making the worst mistake of my life..."
Nup. It ain't going away. Anne Vitale has anecdotal retrospective information on E reducing GID, and subsequent return on cessation. It's not strong evidence given the nature of the report.
My personal experience in trying to fix it mentally - it'd go for a while then come back big time. Low dose has worked out well for me. I'm not stopping it as it's keeping me relatively sane.
It took me four years on testosterone to realize my discomfort I had in my increased body hair and my deepened voice. Aside from these, all other effects of hormones I've been quite happily content with - the biggest moment for me was that I realized I had became comfortable in my own skin, I don't know when this happened, I assume it happened gradually over the period of four years. It's amazing.
Pre-T, I had very crazy mood swings and suicidal tendencies that couldn't be controlled by different combinations of anti-depressants or countless therapy. On T, I have settled down completely and at peace with myself - it was proof that I needed hormones to level everything out in terms of psychological well-being and sense of self.
Not just for myself but for my family as well, since my pre-T behavior caused a lot of tension and arguments. Now, there's just laughter and all-round calm. ^-^
Quote from: Brenda E on July 16, 2014, 09:08:09 PM
Quick update - today was a good day. Feeling 100% great, almost euphoric this morning, my skin kinda tingles a little, occasional waves of sheer pleasure for no reason whatsoever. :)
Without incriminating myself, it feels a little like the rush of an illicit chemical. If I knew what that was, I mean, because, er, I've never done anything like that before. >:-)
Yea! I remember when your avatar had a frown, and I felt so bad for you. Glad you are feeling better. ;D
Quote from: Brenda E on July 17, 2014, 07:00:04 AM
That's what I'm afraid of. It's started to happen already, and I find myself now thinking, "Oh good, the dysphoria has gone away. Maybe that means I'm not trans after all and it was just a phase, and oh my god what on earth am I doing transitioning when I'm not even trans...I must be making the worst mistake of my life..."
I have always wondered what it would be like if I stopped. I know the dangers of stopping and would never do this. In the end, there is no point in testing something we already know the answer to.
It is interesting how individuals react differently. While there are quite obvious physical changes for the short time I have been on HRT, changes in my emotional state is subtle such as that described by suzifrommd. My loss of crippling dysphoria such chest tightness, headaches, and sleeplessness does not equate to an euphoric high or a heightened emotional sense. Without question, I am very pleased with where I am today. It could be possible that much of this is tempered expectations because I am not planning to transition anytime soon.
I had to stop hormones for a week or so after being on them for a month, and it was NOT fun. Felt brain-dead again... felt unfeminine, and it drove me up the wall.
When I finally got my next shipment in, it was seriously like "Oh thank you sweet Lord, I can FEEL again! I'm never going off of you again, sweet sweet hormones!"
It's amazing how finally getting the right hormone in our bodies makes such a huge difference
3 Months of HRT for me
The first two months there were the subtle changes:
~change of smell (my own and for example smelling the air around you while cycling in the park)
~Soften skin
~Breast development and increased sensitivity
~Sense of calm, ease
Since a month or so I really started feeling energetic and alive, something I always lacked. I feel like my own motivation and get out of bed to make something of the day .
Daily mundane things I now do without much thought to it and I enjoy planning and doing things that were out of my comfy zone.
Bad days are now less bad because I seem to deal with adversary much better now.
Some of this is due HRT and other things get better because I'm starting to feel happier with my body
It's not all rosey though;
I'm having trouble sleeping and can't get a good 8 hours like I used to...my sleep is scattered and sweaty. Endo told me it's probably nothing serious but I need to watch it
My libido is very low, nothing seems to excite me: looking at girls/guys doesnt get me interested, fantasizing is hard and watching/reading erotica is like watching the news. It's mainly a worry for the future: "Will I get some sex drive back?" I guess I now understand what asexual people feel somewhat.
All in all I think I made the right choice, it feels good and I am open to life
Vivien
Sometimes when sleep is less and there are night sweats, it could be lack of T and not taking enough E to compensate for that. Same thing for libido but libido would be expected to change and drop somewhat in intensity due to less T. I sometimes hear of these symptoms from girls who take androcur (cyproterone acetate), for instance.
Just my 2 cents but your endo has the last word and is the expert. ;) If this persists, then perhaps discuss this with him again in the future. I'm glad everything else is going so well for you. :)
p.s.: progesterone helped me to sleep better. Tends to do that in many other girls too.
Thank you Kay ^^
It's very possible that that's why I feel so awful at night and barely any libido left . I went to the endo yesterday but it was my first evaluation and he could only measure my physical changes and heartbeat. Ill get the review about the hormone levels of my yesterday visit in 3 months so it's a bit like you're looking into your past if you understand what I mean
Yea. Personally, if I felt both these symptoms and they persisted for at least a week, I would talk to my doctor and ask for something to be done ASAP. I wouldn't wait...
Well I take Anti-Androgen(Cypro) tablets and Estradiol patches . It probably doesnt tell enough
Just curious, does placement of the patches play a role? (I put them on the sides of my hips/bum usually)
Note: I did have a huge deficiency in Vitamin D before I started, something he said was pretty common with people with social anxiety and dont get much sun. He prescribed me pills for it but said I could go sun bathing if I preferrred that. Choice 2 it is, going out in a bit with some shades and sunscreen ^^
I read that bum gave slightly better levels BUT you should always ask doctor first and be sure they agree with placement.
I, too, recently was tested and it was shown that my Vitamin D levels were very low. I'm now taking some supplements AND sunbathing here and there just cause I like how I look when I'm tanned. :) But, with the estrogen in my system, the tan seems to last much longer AND I get lots of freckles mostly around the nose, under eye area. Apparently, estrogen increases skin pigmentation. I like it. No complaints so far. ;)
*high five*
Lets do an E-Sunbath together , wee :P
My skin actually lost pigmentation ( I have some natural tan) over the course of the years, so I felt somewhat 'ghastly', good indication what I felt was visible
Its been just over a month for me and I'm just now noticing some very slight physical changes. However there was one change near the start that was almost immediate. That was a decrease in amount of ejaculation, but increase in distance traveled. Is this bizarre? I don't understand such an odd change, but could the Finasteride, which can shrink the prostate, be playing a part in this massive increase in ejaculatory distance?
Quote from: AnnaCannibal on July 18, 2014, 06:16:00 PMHowever there was one change near the start that was almost immediate. That was a decrease in amount of ejaculation, but increase in distance traveled. Is this bizarre?
Too. Much. Information. (I can never unthink the mental image I just had of how, precisely, you managed to find that out :))
But yes, bizarre! And your theory sounds perfectly reasonable to me.
I had come back to report that I am still absolutely loving the general effects of low dose estrogen, but that kinda seems, well, a bit of a lame disclosure considering the vivid detail of the above!
LOL. My sides are so sore. I needed a good laugh. This has made my day!
Aisla
Quote from: Brenda E on July 18, 2014, 07:59:27 PM
Too. Much. Information. (I can never unthink the mental image I just had of how, precisely, you managed to find that out :))
But yes, bizarre! And your theory sounds perfectly reasonable to me.
I had come back to report that I am still absolutely loving the general effects of low dose estrogen, but that kinda seems, well, a bit of a lame disclosure considering the vivid detail of the above!
I thought it might be a bit much. But one thing that sure hasn't changed with HRT is I still have no shame. Good day!
:angel:
its somewhat of a you just know answer
it feels right and good calm and nice or worse
i was on hrt for almost a year and i got a confirmation its the right move..of corse it caused the anxiety and stress of medical concerns tests and doctor appointments every month or two but beetween those times of anxiety i could take a shower hold what had become of my breasts and just smile side to side almost yelling "i love you two!" and now i can say i miss being on hormones again
made me so happy
you just see the signs every day
if it makes you sad and you see those good changes occuring in a bad way and they make you feel bad about yourself it might not be good for you
but if you see those changes and you want to explode out of happyness it might just be right for you
Quote from: AnnaCannibal on July 18, 2014, 06:16:00 PM
Its been just over a month for me and I'm just now noticing some very slight physical changes. However there was one change near the start that was almost immediate. That was a decrease in amount of ejaculation, but increase in distance traveled. Is this bizarre? I don't understand such an odd change, but could the Finasteride, which can shrink the prostate, be playing a part in this massive increase in ejaculatory distance?
Weird... I'm on Finasteride also, and I was already shooting blanks by the end of the first month. (And man, that felt good! I've always hated the stuff, and felt completely gross every single time it came out before.) Anyway, might just be an individual thing.
Quote from: suzifrommd on July 15, 2014, 08:27:22 PM
I found all effects of HRT very subtle.
For me, the most gendered effect was a gradual emotional shift into being comfortable with a nurturing and accepting stance. I no longer felt like I had to "react" to everything. I found myself judging things and people less and wanting to support them more.
This felt very much like I wanted myself to feel. If I'd been an alpha male, I doubt I would have tolerated this, for example.
I'm not sure I quite believe the stories of the person who declares "this is awful" in response to hormones. The effects are really muted.
Suzi. what a GREAT post...I have some feelings like this, too, and you expressed much of what I FEEL, so very well...
What a GREAT post you have made here...
Quote from: Cynthia Michelle on July 15, 2014, 07:32:23 PM
slippery slope, for me yes. I am so glad I started HRT and I was afraid for so long. Now I can not remember why I was afraid. I wanted just spiro then spiro and low does E. Well I asked for (moment of truth) full hrt. I asked my therapist at the time if she thought I would come off hrt after I started. She said give it 4 months and she did not think I would come off hrt. 6 weeks in and I knew there was no going back.
You will know if it is right for you. Your brain will be receiving the correct hormones and it is wonderful. It takes a few days to start and then slowly you will notice things start to change. There is a long list of things that are improved such as:
Dysphoria
colors
no odor
can smell much better, especially guys
mental focus
confidence
physical things like joints
skin
hair
boobs
happy
being able to sleep
I was told progesterone would not do anything but increase my bust. Well that too had some great effects such mood and happiness and reduced depression.
If it is not right for you then, I was told, negative effects increase.
Cynthia, marvelous post.
I am just 5 weeks in, nicely always protruding nipples, rounder and slightly bigger breast area, NO more body odor wow that happened in just THREE weeks...
A little softer skin on part of my face
No more acne on my face...
Hair on my head feels smoother...and strangely enough, I have lost my desire to get a haircut anytime soon...I was NOT expecting this mental change in just 5 weeks...WOW.
Best of all WOW do I feel great, and right...Progesterone is amazing...and the estrogen is great, too.
I want to keep taking E and P because they make me feel SO HAPPY AND delightful!!!!
:)
Johanna
After the first week of being on hormones I knew for sure that transitioning was right for me. Everything about my state of mind with depression, severe anxiety & dysphoria, gone! The early signs of breast development & many other physical changes along with the absolute best part was the nearly complete caseation of morning wood was all pure bliss for me. But at the same time this brought on a great sense of angst as I now knew the obstacles that would be on the horizon for me in regards to putting everything in my life on the line. I can say it now after 7+ months and recently going full time that yes everything has been worth it.
3 months here, same experience, my depressive mood is good I've never felt this much energy and courage
I still have social anxiety in public when I have to pass people or be close to them. I get so tense and have to focus on keeping my composure.
Massive issues with being able passable